


you and me and this temptation

by arcanine, euphowolf



Category: Love Live! School Idol Project
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fashion & Models, Angst, F/F, Romance, Slow Burn, emotional cheating, side nozoeli
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-20
Updated: 2019-08-02
Packaged: 2019-09-23 11:17:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 101,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17079317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arcanine/pseuds/arcanine, https://archiveofourown.org/users/euphowolf/pseuds/euphowolf
Summary: “Okay,” Tsubasa says, cheerfully. “Who’s ready to get started?”Maki and Nico simply look at each other. Neither of them make a move to reply.This is going to be a disaster.It's going to be a long couple of months.[Because the only thing worse than being forced to work with your boss’ nightmare girlfriend is accidentally falling for her.]





	1. Collision Course

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was born from some choice music and an impromptu headcanoning session that quickly spiralled out of control. With one person in the middle of a major writing drought and the other fresh off of finishing a multi-chapter fic already, neither of us expected to ever write a long-form NicoMaki fic again, but somehow this collab happened! We’re both really enjoying writing together, and we're so excited to show the fandom exactly what can happen when two diehard NicoMaki fans team up. If you've come across either of our fics before you might be able to guess, but if not then rest assured: this is full on endgame NicoMaki. It might just take a little while to get there...
> 
> Disclaimer: Needless to say, cheating is never okay and you should always communicate with your partner early on instead of letting small problems grow into big ones. We promise now that there won’t be any physical cheating happening in this fic. Tsubasa is a lovely character and we definitely didn’t write this with the intention of putting her through any emotional stress, so if Tsubasa happens to be your favorite, please don’t hold this AU against us!
> 
> Title stolen from the lyrics of a song by queen of pop Carly Rae Jepsen.

**i.**

“Whoa! This color looks so good on you!”

Nico puts the cap back on the lipstick and reaches for her makeup brush. Just a little more blush and the woman in front of her has completed her transformation from a cute housewife to a hot goddess with killer cheekbones. Nico studies the woman's face and she smiles. She doesn't like to brag, but she's probably the best beauty advisor in the world! Or the country. At the very least, she's the best in the mall.

“There,” Nico says. “All done!”

The woman shifts in her chair. “Really? Does it look okay? It's not too much, is it?”

“You look _amazing_! I’m going to turn you around to face that mirror and if you have a single doubt about how good you look, Nico will personally take you to get your eyes tested.”

The woman laughs. Nico moves her chair so she's facing the mirror. “Ta da!”

“Oh my god.” The woman leans closer, tilting her head to examine her reflection. “I… I look…”

“ _So_ good,” says Nico. “Seriously. Make sure you take a ton of pics at your daughter’s engagement party, because you're gonna be looking back at them for years thinking, _wow, I'm so beautiful, thanks Nico!_ ”

“I can't believe how different I look? You're like - like a miracle worker or something. Thanks, Nico!”

Nico shakes her head. She can't help but grin. This is always the best part - seeing how happy the customers are after she’s helped them out. She tries so hard to be humble, but it's difficult, when so many people praise her for her talents and skills. She’s practically a fairy godmother, granting wishes left and right.

“I just helped you find the shades that work for your natural beauty. The rest was all you. Oh, but you have to promise to try out those products I recommended. I want you to feel this amazing every single day! Now let's go get you all checked out so you can get to your party on time and-”

Something on the other side of the store catches Nico's attention. She freezes. Her heart skips a beat. An odd mixture of fear and excitement shivers through her entire body. She'd recognize that face anywhere. That haircut. That figure. That - _oh_.

Nico relaxes and chuckles to herself. Ever since the new product launch last month, she’s been constantly caught off-guard by the life-sized cardboard cutout of Tsubasa Kira installed at the front of the store. It surprises her so often that it's a miracle she hasn’t died of a heart attack yet.

Not that she minds. She nearly screamed with joy when Nozomi asked her to lend a hand in setting it up. It’s a perfect likeness. She’s already taken a million selfies with it, and she can't even count the time she's lost gazing at it, having fantastically vivid daydreams about what she’d do if she ever met the real, non-cardboard Tsubasa. Sure, some people might say that Nico is a _little_ over-excited, but who can blame her? This is Tsubasa Kira, the founder and CEO of Kira Cosmetics, after all. Even just the (highly realistic!) cardboard cutout of her commands a captivating and impressive aura. Nico fully intends to take it home with her once the campaign is over.

Nico hears the soft sound of a throat being cleared. She straightens up and beams at her customer, deflecting her look of concern with a winning smile. “Sorry! I totally spaced out there. Let me ring you up. Can I interest you in signing up for a membership card? It’ll only take a second, I promise…”

The woman enthusiastically accepts the offer. Nico enters her information into the computer, fondly imagining which corner of her apartment she’ll put the cutout in when she gets ahold of it.

Yep, there are plenty of perks that come with being an employee of Kira Cosmetics, and not just ones related to the privilege of working - however indirectly - for Tsubasa herself. Nico’s drastically reduced her makeup expenses ever since she started the job half a year ago thanks to some sweet discounts, and Nozomi doesn’t mind when she takes home some of the leftover inventory. The hours are strenuous but manageable, and the pay is much better than anyone would expect a retail job at a mall to be. She's getting experience while doing what she loves, and she's proud to be contributing to her idol's growing cosmetics empire, even just a little.

Finishing up the transaction, Nico swipes the credit card with a practiced flourish and hands it back. She leans back to admire her handiwork one more time from a different angle. She really _has_ outdone herself this time. Like she does every time.

“Thank you so much!” the lady gushes again. She takes her new makeup bag - free, with a purchase of over 8000 yen - and clutches it to her chest as if it’s a family heirloom. “I can’t _wait_ to tell my friends. We’ll be back for sure, Nico!”

Nico waves her off, humming cheerfully to herself as she puts the last of her makeup brushes back into place. It’s not long before her counter’s back to its usual pristine condition and she's all ready for her next customer. It's been a busy afternoon, with Nozomi up in the office working on boring managerial paperwork stuff, but Nico's handled it pretty well. Honestly, cardboard Tsubasa’s probably her good luck charm; she’s already hit her commission goal, and there’s still another week left in the month. Nico pivots so she can admire the standee yet again - and that’s when she realizes.

The cutout isn’t at the front entrance anymore. In fact, it never should have been.

She turns around quickly, her mind racing. That’s right. They moved it to the other side of the counter last week to make room for a different display. She can see the back of it from where she’s standing, so it’s definitely where it belongs. But then... what the hell did she see earlier?

The sound of approaching footsteps shatters her train of thought. Another customer. She doesn’t have time to puzzle over this now. She steels herself as a quiet but firm voice calls out to her.

“Excuse me, miss. Could I ask you for a recommendation?”

“Sure!” Nico spins around. She gasps. She steps back into the counter and her entire collection of neatly arranged makeup brushes clatter to the ground.

The person in front of Nico looks _exactly_ like the cardboard cutout, or - more accurately - the cardboard cutout looks exactly like the person standing in front of Nico, so that means that unless the new campaign features a highly sophisticated robot or a lifelike hologram then - then it’s really her. It’s really -

“Tsubas- uhhh, no - I mean Kira! I mean- ”

Nico leans down to grab the makeup brushes and hide her flushing face. She can't believe she almost called the CEO of the esteemed company she works for by her first name. What is she even doing here? Doesn't she have more important places to be?

A beautifully manicured hand reaches out to help.

“Tsubasa’s fine,” she says, picking up the brushes as Nico simply gapes at her. “Sorry I surprised you. I don’t usually get time to drop by and see how things are going in my stores unless there’s a special event, but I was in the area today so…”

Tsubasa smiles and it's dazzling. Nico was wrong. The cardboard cutout can’t even compare to the angel descended from heaven standing before her. She looks even more perfect in real life than she does in her photos, with her flawlessly styled short hair and her sharply angled face. She’s wearing an immaculate, white business jacket which clings snugly to her slender yet powerful physique. She’s stylish. She's effortless. She's more blinding than the sun. Nico’s completely speechless.

“So how long have you worked here, uhhh-” Tsubasa’s eyes flick down to Nico’s nameplate, then back up to her face. “Nico?”

Her name. On Tsubasa’s lips. Every single one of Nico’s dreams are coming true. Through sheer force of will, she manages to squeak out a response.

“That’s me! Nico. Nico Yazawa.” She’s unable to stop herself from giggling hysterically. “I've only been here for six months, so I’m still learning the ropes. A-And can I just say, it’s such an honor to meet you! I’m a big fan! I mean, I really love your products-”

“I can tell.” Tsubasa puts the last of the brushes back on the counter. “It was so nice watching you work. I was actually going to try get you to recommend me something and _then_ introduce myself, but you kinda spoiled my fun when you recognized me straight away.”

Of _course_ Nico recognized her. She’s been following Tsubasa’s career for years. A model at the age of 17 who went on to become the youngest CEO of a cosmetics company at the youthful age of 22. Beauty guru, entrepreneur, and even philanthropist, all in one - she’s everything Nico’s ever aspired to be and more.

Nico’s far too sophisticated to mention any of that though. The last thing she needs is her hero thinking she’s some sort of stalker.

“I follow you online,” she explains instead, which is a gross understatement. “And well…” She gestures to the cardboard look-alike and Tsubasa’s gaze follows the motion.

“Ah.” Tsubasa chuckles. She walks over to get a better look at it, and Nico trails after her in a daze. She shakes her head as she examines the cutout, a rueful expression on her pristine face. “You know, I told marketing this wasn’t a good idea, but they insisted. I haven’t the faintest idea why. It’s a little creepy, don’t you think?”

“Not at all!” Nico blurts out, then winces when Tsubasa raises an eyebrow in surprise. “Uh, I mean- It’s good for brand recognition! You’re an inspiration! The face of the company! A makeup superstar!”

She’s babbling, she knows, but her mouth won’t listen to her brain. Thankfully, Tsubasa just looks amused.

“So you’ve been here six months? Did you start working here straight after high school?”

“Um,” Nico mumbles, “Well, uh. Actually, we’re the same age…”

Tsubasa looks taken aback and that kind of thing _might_ add to Nico’s complex about looking young, if this wasn’t the best day of her entire life. Now’s hardly the time to get weighed down by details. In the documentary of Nico’s life, this iconic moment will definitely be a highlight. If Nico had her camera, she'd vlog this moment and upload it to her YouTube channel.

“ _Oh_ ,” says Tsubasa. “My mistake. I didn’t mean to-”

“That’s alright!” Nico cuts in quickly, to save both of them the awkwardness. “So, yeah, I was doing makeup at a beauty salon before this, but to be honest, I always wanted to work for _you_. So when I heard there was an opening here…”

“You jumped at the chance?” Tsubasa finishes. She’s eyeing Nico more carefully now. She looks so deep in thought that Nico kind of feels like she's being examined under a microscope. “Hm. And you do your own makeup?”

“Always! Today I mostly used the Kira Cosmetics Winter Sparkle palette from a few years back - a total classic, by the way - but I also used a few free samples from the new spring collection and-”

Nico laughs nervously then presses her lips tightly together. It’s probably not a good idea to tell her boss of all bosses how many makeup looks she creates using leftover free samples.

Tsubasa studies her for a long moment before she speaks. “This might sound crazy,” she says, “but can I meet with you next week?”

Nico’s mouth goes dry. Her heart speeds up. She should never have mentioned the samples. What if she gets fired? Or sued? Or sent to jail? Nico can’t afford a lawyer. She can barely afford to buy _lunch._

“I’m starting a new ad campaign and I’m really trying to keep things _fresh._ It’s so easy to use the same models and the same crew, but then all you get is something that looks the same as every other brand, you know?”

“Yeah,” Nico nods as though she’s an expert on that kind of thing. She isn’t sure where Tsubasa is going with this, but at least it sounds like she’s not in trouble. Yet.

“I have a photographer. And I have a model in mind, if she’ll agree. But I’m still looking for a makeup artist...”

“Oh,” Nico says, “but it’ll be easy to find one, right? I mean, working in the makeup industry and all that.”

“You’d think,” agrees Tsubasa. “I’ve met with so many people that are great at what they do but I’ve been so… so uninspired. I don’t want to hire someone just because they can name drop a bunch of celebrities they’ve worked with. I want someone with a genuine passion for Kira Cosmetics.”

“Of course.” Nico bobs her head rapidly up and down. “Yeah. That’s totally understandable.”

“Like I said,” says Tsubasa, “This probably sounds crazy. But seeing you with that customer made me realize something _._ I was looking in entirely the wrong place. Why was I meeting with people who have barely even glanced at my products, and not considering someone who works with them every day?”

Tsubasa smiles with a confidence that's equal parts intimidating and awe-inspiring. Nico stares. She's still not quite following -

“The work would be irregular. And the model I have in mind has quite the busy schedule, so it might take a few months to shoot the whole campaign. But we’d make sure the pay more than compensates for any shifts you miss here while you’re out on location-”

“Wait, uh, did you say... while _I’m_ out on location?”

“You clearly have the skills and the enthusiasm. I'd have to start you off on a trial run, but don't worry too much about it, it's really just a formality...”

Nico takes a step back. There must be something wrong with her ears, because it _sounds_ like Tsubasa just asked her to be the makeup artist in her new campaign. But that’s ridiculous. It isn’t possible. She’s probably having auditory hallucinations.

But if she’s hallucinating, then why is Tsubasa gazing straight at her with such an eager gleam in her eyes?

“So? How about it, Nico? Is Monday a good time for you to come down to the office?”

Nico’s mouth drops open. She searches frantically for a trace of humor, a hint of irony in Tsubasa’s visage and finds none.

“Y-You mean, you really - you want _me_ to…”

“I want you to work on this campaign for me, yes.” Tsubasa’s lips curve upward as she tilts her head. “You don’t want to?”

“No! Nothing like that!” Nico shakes her head frantically. “But… But I’m not qualified? I mean, don’t you want people with, like. You know. Professional experience?”

“You seem more than qualified to me.” Tsubasa’s eyes light up suddenly. “But I suppose we can always conduct an interview first.” Without warning, she drops into the seat meant for customers in the middle of a makeover. She sits up, crossing her legs, and her tone instantly takes on an air of authority. “Name and age?”

Nico snaps to attention. Oh god, she’s interviewing _now_? But she hasn’t even had time to prepare!

“Nico Yazawa. 24 years old!”

“Education level?”

“Um…” Nico struggles to remember what she wrote on her resume. She doesn't think she exaggerated ( _much_ ). “After graduating high school, I went to a two-year beauty school in Tokyo.”

Tsubasa steeples her fingers and gives Nico a stern look. Although they’re the same height, and Tsubasa’s sitting down, Nico still has the distinct feeling that she’s being towered over.

“And I can count on you to work hard on this campaign, and for Kira Cosmetics?”

“You can! Nico will impress you at the trial run! I'll work harder than I’ve ever worked in my life!”

Tsubasa leaves her hanging for so long that Nico’s _sure_ she’s botched it all somehow, and that she’s lost her only chance at the job of her dreams. Finally, though, a sly, cat-like grin spreads over Tsubasa’s face.

“Then as far as I’m concerned, you’re the right fit for the job.”

Nico wants to yell and live-tweet and break into a celebratory musical number all at the same time. Is this really happening? She’s dreamed about meeting Tsubasa. She’s dreamed about working as a real makeup artist on a real photoshoot. But she never imagined - not even for a second - that both these things could happen all at once.

“Thank you,” she says (nearly shouts) fervently. “You don't know how much this means to me.”

Tsubasa nods, graceful as ever. “The pleasure’s all mine. Do you have any questions?”

“I…” Nico worries at her lower lip. Questions? She has so many she doesn't even know where to begin. Logistics. Pay. If she's allowed to document the whole process to show off to her 600 subscribers. But there's one that's more pressing than all the others combined.

“I don't mean this in a bad way,” she starts hesitantly. “But, I'm just wondering… Why me?”

Tsubasa makes a thoughtful expression. “I don’t know exactly. I just have a good feeling about you, Nico. You seem easy to be around, which is good because the model I have in mind can be… well, a little _difficult_. She’s not exactly a… people person.” She says this fondly, and her eyes take on a faraway look. Nico gets the impression that whoever this woman is, she’s important to Tsubasa.

“Well,” Nico offers, puffing out her chest a little, “You’re in luck! Nico’s the most people-est… person around! I can make friends with _anyone_!”

“I don’t doubt it,” Tsubasa says, winking. “You’ve already charmed me.”

Nico kind of wishes that she’d stop doing that, because she feels like she’s about two seconds away from passing out onto the shiny tiled floor.

“Oh! I’m late.” Tsubasa spies the clock on the wall and hops off her seat. She reaches into her jacket pocket for a business card and holds it out to Nico. “I should get going. Anju will fill you in on more details when you call.”

Nico takes the business card with trembling hands. It’s got a simple design, gold on cream, with “Kira Cosmetics” and the main office’s number embossed in flowing script. She’s going to frame it when she gets home.

“Any last-minute questions before I jet off?”

Nico looks up. She licks her dry lips as she carefully tucks the business card away. Today has been nothing short of momentous. She’s crossed at _least_ three items off her bucket list. She really shouldn’t push her luck any further, not when she’s already been so blessed.

But she’s unable to resist the temptation. Nico finds herself reaching behind the counter for her personal notebook and a pen. She clicks the pen twice anxiously as she faces Tsubasa again.

“Could… Could I get an autograph?”

True to her nature, Tsubasa takes it in stride. “Of course,” she says grandly, and Nico breathes a sigh of relief. She flips to a blank page and then presents it to Tsubasa.

There’s a loud vibrating sound as Tsubasa finishes signing. She hands back the notebook and pulls out a phone.

“Sorry, I’d better take this. Hello? I’m on my way right now. No, don’t cancel the reservation - I’ll be there in ten minutes. One second-”

Tsubasa covers the speaker with one hand and nods graciously at Nico once more. “See you next week then, Nico.”

Tsubasa waves and she turns and Nico can only stare after her as she walks out of the store, her fancy heels clicking on the shiny floor.

“The mall. Getting you a present, actually. It’s a secret. I’ll tell you over dinner, if you’re good-”

She disappears into the busy flow of shoppers. Nico’s still staring long after she’s gone.

 

 

 

**ii.**

She's late again. Maki doesn't know why she’s surprised. After spending almost two years dating someone who's won multiple awards for her outstanding entrepreneurship, she should be used to it. Tsubasa has meetings. She has business trips. Conference calls and interviews and photoshoots. She works hard and Maki _respects_ that.

But it doesn't make her any less pissed that she left her lab early to sit in an empty waiting room outside Tsubasa's office all by herself. _Again._

Maki checks her phone for the seventh time and she sighs. She knew this was a bad idea. To this day, she still doesn’t know why she agreed to it.

Maybe it was the sparkling wine, or the sweeping view of Tokyo from the rooftop restaurant. Maybe it was the fact that it’d been over a week since they’d last found the time to eat together, or the way Tsubasa had asked her. The hopeful gleam in her eyes when she'd taken Maki's hand over dinner and said, “I want you to model in my new campaign.”

Of course, Maki hadn't agreed immediately. In fact, her first instinct had been to wait for the punchline, because obviously something so crazy could only be a joke. But Tsubasa had stared at Maki earnestly as she squeezed her hands, until it was painfully obvious. She was actually being _serious_.

So Maki reacted like any normal person would. She voiced her concerns out loud. “Are you _crazy_?”

“Actually,” Tsubasa said, “I'm kind of a genius.”

Maki might have rolled her eyes at such a bold statement, but despite her huge success, Tsubasa doesn’t often brag. So Maki listened tentatively. She listened, but she was ready to object, to shut down the laughable idea at the soonest opportunity.

“The concept,” Tsubasa said, “is _Forever_. It’s a new line of smudgeproof, waterproof products. Makeup that stays with you. Makeup that you can depend on.”

“Okay,” Maki said. “But what does that have to do with _me_?”

“You’ve been with me for almost two years now. You’re the person that I depend on.” Tsubasa looked at her so adoringly that Maki couldn't stop the blush from creeping onto her cheeks. After so long, her girlfriend still knew exactly what to say. “Isn’t that just the cutest concept? Marketing ate it right up. When I told them our two year anniversary is coming up, they were practically begging me to get you to agree to it.”

At that, Maki’s mood darkened again. She bristled at the thought of Tsubasa discussing their relationship with strangers in suits.

“Don't look so worried. They already knew. It’s not like I'm planning on announcing it to the world or anything. I just-” Tsubasa let go of Maki's hands as the waiter approached, topping up their wine glasses with an elegant twist of his hands. “Oh, thanks so much.”

Maki waited until he’d left to continue. “I don’t understand. This doesn’t make any sense. You know so many perfectly good models.”

“I know. But it’d really mean a lot to me if it was _you_.” She’d fluttered her pretty eyelashes, a move she knew perfectly well that Maki was weak to. Tsubasa in full charm mode had always been hard to say no to.

Maki groaned and shifted in her seat. “I mean, even if I agreed - which is not what I’m doing, by the way - you’d still have a major flaw in your logic. I’m not a model. I have zero experience.”

Tsubasa laughed like Maki just cracked a one liner. “ _Please_. You’re gorgeous. You’re in great shape. You have perfect posture and the camera _loves_ you. Every single person that sees the campaign is going to want to be you. You might not have experience, but I'm confident that you'd perform well.”

Maki tried her best to stay strong. She willed herself not to be weakened by the compliments and opened her mouth to protest again.

“Besides,” Tsubasa brushed her leg against Maki's. “Haven’t you been lonely lately?”

Maki almost dropped her fork. She recovered smoothly, stabbing at a stalk of broccoli and examining it with great interest. “Not at all. Not even _slightly_.”

Tsubasa hummed in a way that made it perfectly clear that she was entirely unconvinced. “Poor lonely Maki. You’re always complaining that we never spend enough time together. So imagine how fun this will be. You can meet me on set, we’ll have lunch together...”

“I have a job, you know.”

“That you barely take _any_ breaks from. Come on. Your research isn't going to sprout legs and run away. You can ditch your lab coat every once in a while.”

Maki opened her mouth to insist that she did in fact take breaks, but then she remembered the gasp of shock she elicited from her co-workers when she’d said she was going out for lunch. She bit her lip to stop herself from pouting.

“I thought you liked my lab coat...”

There was a smug glimmer in Tsubasa’s eye then, one that said she knew perfectly well she was wearing Maki down.

“I do, babe. I just think it’d be nice to see you all dressed up, too.”

Maki took a large sip of her wine, if only to stall for a moment. She knew her defense was crumbling. She was running out of reasons to refuse.

“Wouldn’t you rather have a professional model?” she suggested weakly, but Tsubasa had an answer ready.

“I want _you_ ,” she insisted, her tone dripping with sincerity. “I want to show off my beautiful girlfriend to the whole world. If you’d let me...”

It was a testament to how well Tsubasa knew Maki, the way she leaned back in her chair and gave her time to think. Maki’s thoughts had raced as she created a mental checklist, weighing up how much this meant to Tsubasa against her own misgivings.

In the end, Tsubasa won. Just like she always did.

“So... it’s really called Forever?” Maki asked reluctantly.

Tsubasa’s smile was jubilant. “Yeah. Forever. It's cute, right?”

Maki had smiled back, but she couldn’t shake the uncertainty that was twisting in her stomach.

And that uncertainty has only increased over the past week, now that she’s had time to really think it through. It took her awhile, but Maki’s come to realize that this is more than just another makeup campaign to Tsubasa.

Honestly, the name should have been a dead giveaway. _Forever_. It sounds like a promise - or rather, a contract. Either way, there’s a lot more riding on this than sales and brand reputation. If it goes well, they’ll be closer than ever. But if she screws this up, then maybe they’ll never shake the distance that creeps in on all those days they spend apart. So it’s kind of a big deal. It’s a lot of pressure.

And since Maki dragged herself away from her very important job and made the effort, shouldn’t Tsubasa do the same? Would it kill her to be on time for once?

Maki hears footsteps in the corridor. She sits up straighter.

“ _Finally_ ,” she mutters, as the door swings open.

The girl who steps into the room is around the same height as Tsubasa, but that's where the similarities end.

She’s younger. _Much_ younger. From the ribbons in her dark hair and her obvious fondness of pastel pink, it's quite clear that she's not old enough to be here on business. She must be looking for someone. Perhaps she’s a daughter or a niece of the receptionist?

Their eyes meet and the girl looks briefly confused. Maki feels her cheeks get hotter when she realizes she must be glaring. She lowers her gaze and attempts to smooth her expression to something more neutral. She slumps further down into her chair, willing herself not to stare as the girl approaches the receptionist.

Maki’s expecting her to say she's lost. She’s expecting her to burst into tears and ask for directions to a nearby junior high school. So it's kind of a surprise when she leans over the desk and says, “I have a meeting with Kira Tsubasa.”

Her voice - despite its high pitch - sounds surprisingly professional. There's a polished precision in the way she says it, like she's been practicing the phrase in front of a mirror.

The receptionist shifts awkwardly in her seat, glancing briefly in Maki’s direction.

“Kira’s... running a little late,” she says, and Maki tries hard not to sigh out loud. “But she'll be with you soon. Please have a seat.”

“Sure! No problem. Thanks.”

The girl drops daintily into a chair. She has some common sense at least, leaving a seat between the two of them - a respectable distance apart in the small waiting room.

Maki picks up a magazine with Tsubasa's face on the front and pretends to read it. With an article about exfoliation as the perfect ruse, she sneaks a long glance sideways. It’s not like she’s particularly interested or anything. She just has many, _many_ questions.

For starters, why does Tsubasa have a business meeting with a child? Did she forget that she’d already arranged to meet Maki? And why is this girl taking a photo of herself? Why do young people insist on doing that in every possible situation?

At a closer glance, she might be older than Maki originally thought. She’s wearing slightly too much makeup, but it’s possible that some people might consider her to be cute, if they were into that whole long eyelashes and pouty pink lips thing (which Maki _isn’t_ ). The girl turns her head and catches her staring. Maki forces the magazine upwards to hide her flushing face. She hears the girl shuffle in her seat.

“Hey… are you waiting for Tsubasa too?”

Oh god. Big mistake. They made eye contact and now she thinks Maki wants to engage in conversation, when in fact she wants the exact opposite. She wants this girl to disappear. She wants her to take her questions about work experience elsewhere so that Maki can have Tsubasa’s full attention when she finally arrives and Maki tells her that modelling is canceled and this whole thing is far too much of a hassle.

Maki counts to five in her head before she lowers the magazine reluctantly. The girl is staring at her with big, expectant eyes, and Maki knows it’s her own fault. She should’ve never let her defenses down and entered a public space without her headphones.

The girl leans a little closer. The receptionist glances over towards them. Maki knows that she has to say _something._ And probably something nicer than, _I feel like I've spent the last year waiting around for Tsubasa._

So she offers the bare minimum - a curt nod and a hum of confirmation. She reaches for the magazine again and pretends to take great interest in a highly intellectual article about taking better selfies, but the girl, it seems, is terrible at reading the mood. Out of the corner of her eye, Maki sees her entire face light up.

“Me too!” she exclaims, at a volume that is completely inappropriate for the quiet waiting room. “I’m, like, super nervous. It’s my first time here and I’m kinda freaking out!”

Maki regrets missing the chance she had to lie and end the conversation early. She tries to make up for it now by responding with a noncommital grunt and rustling the magazine’s pages meaningfully, but it’s too late. The girl starts chattering away. Teenagers are even more annoying than Maki remembers them being.

“I still can’t believe I actually have an appointment with _Tsubasa_. I mean, isn’t she just so cool? She’s the CEO of an international company and she’s only in her 20s! And her makeup has basically changed the industry forever. She’s a _visionary_.”

Great. Not only is Maki being forced to wait again, but now she has to talk to another one of Tsubasa’s groupies. She doesn’t understand how anyone can be so excited about makeup. The girl's fervor is practically religious in its intensity.

Normally, Maki would just let it slide. She’s no stranger to random passersby praising her girlfriend - occasionally, she even enjoys it. It is kind of flattering, knowing how so many people flatout worship the person she's in a relationship with. But Maki's not feeling especially charitable right now, and for some reason she has the insane urge to destroy this kid's hopes and dreams.

“If she’s such a visionary then how come she’s making us wait?”

Maki doesn’t feel great about bad mouthing her girlfriend, but she does feel a smug sense of satisfaction as the girl’s hopeful expression flattens. But that still doesn't stop her. She regains her composure quickly, a look of determination crossing her face.

“I’ll wait for as long as it takes! I’m sure whatever Tsubasa’s doing right now is super important. You might not know this, but she usually has a lot of projects on the go at once. It’s amazing that she can find time for all her campaigns and new product launches and charity work and-”

“Are you some kind of _stalker?_ ”

This time, Maki's glare is intentional. She knows she should have a little more patience, but everything about this girl is irritating, from her stupid pink jacket to her implication that Maki lacks knowledge about her own girlfriend. The way she gasps in offense - covering her mouth dramatically like she’s acting in some low budget TV movie - is also pretty damn annoying.

“Of course not! I just happen to be a big fan. It wouldn’t kill you to show a little respect for the legend who’s been named _Vogue’s_ ‘Top Influencer To Watch’ two issues in a row.”

Maki can tell that the receptionist is eavesdropping intently from behind her desk, but she can’t stop herself. It’s now become her civic duty to set this high schooler straight. She does lower her voice a little, if only because they’re in a public space and if she doesn’t force herself to whisper she might scream instead.

“That means nothing. She runs a _makeup_ company. It’s not a big deal. She’s not curing cancer.”

The girl’s face goes white, as if Maki just insulted her dead grandmother. She’s unable to speak for a solid ten seconds, but then she balls up her fists and narrows her eyes.

“She’s donated millions of yen to at least two cancer research associations. So yeah, she _is_ kind of curing cancer.”

Maki feels her face grow hot. Tsubasa never told her that, or at least, she doesn’t recall hearing about it. And it bothers her, that some upstart fan could know more about the person she's dating than she does. What kind of terrible girlfriend does that make Maki?

The girl smirks when Maki has no response. “Bet you didn’t know that,” she taunts gleefully.

Maki grabs her phone. She swipes angrily across the screen and unlocks it, imagining the devastated look on the girl’s face when she shows her a picture of the two of them together. When she shows her _proof_ that she knows Tsubasa best.

“If you're looking for articles on Tsubasa then don't even bother. I've read them all. I know more than you ever will.”

Maki drags her hand roughly through her hair. She drops her phone back into her pocket, because on second thought, she’s not even going to give this smug girl the satisfaction of adding another Tsubasa fact to her tiny, crazy mind. The only thing she plans to give this girl is a long, hard stare that thoroughly suggests that she re-evaluates her priorities in life.

“Do you know how creepy you sound?”

“Do you know how rude and uneducated _you_ sound?” The girl jabs a finger in Maki’s direction.

“ _Un-Uneducated_?” Maki splutters, rage flaring in her chest. She graduated top of her class from one of the best universities in the country. She’s a _scientist._ She’s not going to accept that kind of an insult from a teenager who dresses like they’re still in elementary school. “You-”

Maki stops herself. She steadies her shaking hands and presses her lips tightly together and takes a deep, soothing breath. She doesn’t have to sink to this irritating brat’s level. Tsubasa will be here soon. She’ll confirm that there is no meeting and this kid is nothing more than another mini-Tsubasa wannabe stalker and they’ll call security and everything will be right in the world. Maki sinks back into her chair and enjoys the silence. Nothing but the sound of the receptionist, tapping away on her keyboard and sneaking glances at the two of them approximately every thirty seconds. Yes, Maki’s far too mature to engage with this girl any further. Conversation over.

“Ha!” The girl points obnoxiously. “Giving up? That means I win!”

Maki turns to glare so fast that the magazine in her lap clatters to the floor.

“Are you six years old?”

The girl strikes a horrifyingly cutesy pose. “Actually, I’m 24.”

Maki snorts. “If you’re going to lie about your age, try something more realistic. 17 maybe?”

“No, I really am. Wanna see my ID? I have two different kinds, you know!”

Maki leans over the empty chair between them so she can look the girl right in her offensively big eyes.

“I don’t want to see your fake ID. I don’t want to see your badly edited photos or your homemade t-shirts or your amateur Tsubasa fansite! I just,” Maki grits her teeth, “Want you. To stop talking.”

Maki leans back. There’s a long moment of promising silence where she dares to dream that her message has actually got through.

“You know, my fansite is actually super professional...”

Maki bites her lip to stop herself from screaming.

“So you're 24,” she says, her voice dripping with disbelief. “Then aren’t you a little old to be acting so… so gross and obsessive?”

“There’s no age limit on appreciating the Young Business Woman of the Year! I’m sorry that you’re too closed-minded to understand.”

When Maki doesn’t respond, the girl ( _woman?_ No, Maki highly doubts that) huffs and retrieves the fallen magazine from the floor. She smoothes out the creases in the cover and places it on the table gently, like it’s some kind of sacred object.

“Look,” she says. “The bottom line is, Tsubasa’s amazing. She’s not just beautiful, smart, and talented - she’s also _super_ nice. We’re lucky to even be in the same building as her.”

Maki can’t argue with that. She understands that more than anyone. That’s why she fell for Tsubasa in the first place. Young and brilliant and often generous to a fault - who could resist? But it's different, hearing it from a (highly irritating) outsider. Like the world is telling her to be more grateful for her flawless girlfriend when they don't know the first thing about who Tsubasa really is - how careless she can be sometimes, how hard she is to keep up with.

“She's not _perfect_ ,” mumbles Maki, more to reassure herself than to argue any further. The girl overhears her anyway and huffs as she draws herself up to her full, thoroughly unimpressive height.

“And how would _you_ know?” she demands imperiously. “Who the hell are you, anyway?”

Maki utters a humorless bark of laughter. She hears the receptionist cough loudly; she probably knows just as well as Maki that that was the wrong question to ask. Maybe if Maki were in a better mood she wouldn't be so irritated, but as it stands now, she's going to take a real pleasure in putting this girl in her place. That'll show her for being so nosy - and for making Maki feel insecure about her perfectly stable and thriving relationship.

“Well actually,” she drawls, savoring the moment, “I'm-”

She’s interrupted by the sound of the door opening. Maki clamps her mouth shut with an audible click of her teeth and both of them stand up reflexively as Tsubasa comes sweeping in.

“Are they here-” Tsubasa begins breathlessly. The receptionist flicks a finger to the side and Tsubasa notices them. “Oh!”

“Finally,” grumbles Maki, relief washing over her. She ignores the mortified glare the girl shoots her. Tsubasa's here, which means this particularly creepy fan will be escorted from the premises at any moment.

Tsubasa looks between the two of them, commanding all the attention in the room effortlessly as she catches her breath.

“I'm so sorry that I'm late. We were going through contracts with my lawyer and there was a lot of small print and-” Tsubasa shakes her head. “Let's not get into all that. I'm so glad you're both here!”

“B-Both here? What the hell’s going on? What-” Maki gestures towards the girl like she's a bad stain on the carpet. “What is this?”

Maki only realizes how harsh her tone is when Tsubasa winces. But her perfect smile is fixed back in place within moments.

“This is Nico Yazawa, the talented makeup artist who's going to be working with you on your photoshoots. And Nico, this is Maki, our beautiful model.”

The girl - _Yazawa_ \- smiles, but Maki can see the panic behind her eyes, and she relates to that. Maki physically recoils in horror. Her heart starts racing at several times its regular pace. Just looking at this girl makes her feel like a soda can that’s been shaken too many times. This has to be a joke, right? Or a nightmare? There’s no way this can really be happening. The receptionist covers up a snort of laughter with a loud, fake cough.

“I need to speak to you,” Maki says, looking desperately at Tsubasa. “ _Alone_.”

“Why don't we all go into my office? I'll explain everything-”

Yazawa takes a step forward. Maki steps in front of her and blocks her off.

“Tsubasa,” Maki says, her voice hard and flat. “ _Now.”_

“No respect...” a small voice behind her mutters. “Doesn't know who she's talking to…”

At that point, Maki snaps. That's the only way she can explain her actions. She's had enough of this condescending pain in the neck who looks like a child but is apparently a makeup artist approaching her mid 20s and she just wants to shut her up. She just wants to put her in her place.

And that's why she does it. That's why she steps forward and kisses Tsubasa on the lips in an entirely clumsy manner, to the complete surprise of everyone in the room, herself included.

It's entirely worth it for the absolute horror she sees on Yazawa's face when she breaks off the kiss to look over her shoulder.

Tsubasa steps back, her cheeks glowing pink. It’s rare for Maki to see her looking so taken aback. But it's also rare that Maki initiates such a public display of affection. She recovers quickly, turning towards Yazawa, who has gone so pale she might as well be transparent.

“Well, I wasn't planning on telling you right away but uh…” Tsubasa takes Maki's hand and gives her a half-fond, half-bewildered look. “Maki’s my girlfriend.”

Yazawa’s mouth drops open. She's shocked into a stunned silence and Maki barely knows this girl, but she wants to take a photo of her dumbstruck face and frame it.

“Gi-” she stutters, “girl...friend?”

“ _Girlfriend_ ,” Maki repeats, smugly.

Tsubasa glances in Maki's direction, forehead wrinkled in confusion. “Nico,” she says, with a soft, soothing smile. “Forgive me for taking up even more of your time, but... do you mind if I talk to Maki over there for a moment?”

“Sure,” Yazawa says, in a daze. “Sure… take your time.”

Tsubasa leads Maki by the hand to a corner that's occupied by nothing more than a large potted plant. She turns to Maki, her green eyes wide with concern.

“Are you okay?” she asks in a hushed whisper. “Did something happen?”

“That's my line,” Maki hisses furiously. The brief enjoyment she got from Yazawa’s appalled expression is fast disappearing. She jabs an accusatory finger in the direction of the unwelcome intruder. “Why is she here?”

“Like I said earlier, I chose her as lead makeup artist for our campaign…”

“No. No way.”

Tsubasa blinks. She glances over at Yazawa again, then back at Maki, and it’s evident that she’s still trying to catch up with the situation.

“That girl,” Maki steps closer for emphasis, “is a _nightmare_. ”

Tsubasa’s eyes widen with surprise. “What do you mean?”

“She's like… _obsessed_ with you.”

“She's a loyal fan.”

“She's a _stalker_.”

“She's _passionate._ And a total sweetheart.” Tsubasa's disappointed frown deepens. “I don't know why you're being so negative about someone you've just met, Maki. You're always so quick to judge.”

Maki clenches her fists. She doesn't like the implication that she's being unreasonable, especially when Tsubasa hasn't personally experienced how rude this Yazawa is.

“Why does it have to be her? Don't you have a bunch of other people to choose from?”

“I found her working in one of my stores at the mall, and I've never seen someone so dedicated to my products. She knows them practically better than I do. This is probably a big deal for her, so I'm sure she's just excited. You remember what it feels like to be excited about something, don't you?”

Maki makes an intentionally grumpy expression. “No,” she says. “Not really.”

“And I'd feel so terrible if I asked her to leave now. Couldn't you just give her one little chance?”

Maki crosses her arms tightly across her chest. She considers it a whole half a second before she says no again.

“I know what this is,” Tsubasa says, voice soft like she's soothing down a small child from a temper tantrum. “You're not mad at her. You're mad at _me_. But I promise I'll make it up to you.”

Maki sighs. She has to admit that from a safe distance away, Yazawa does look pretty harmless. There is a (very small) part of Maki that knows that her terrible mood might not have helped with their first impressions. Maybe she _is_ just painfully enthusiastic and out of her depth. Maki does have a tiny bit of sympathy for anyone who has to spend their life working at the mall.

“Come on, Maki.” Tsubasa's voice is pleading. She brushes her thumb gently across the back of Maki's hand. “Can't you please just try? For me?”

And here's the thing. Maki fully intends to refuse. Her lips have already begun to form a firm and final “no,” and she's ready to settle this ordeal once and for all.

But the pragmatic side of her mind betrays her, as per usual. She remembers how excited Tsubasa is about this project, how she’s supposed to be trying to support her partner, not shutting her down at every turn. She’d resolved not to be a killjoy, so why is she being so contrary when they haven’t even _started_ yet? Tsubasa’s clearly hand-picked this girl to be part of her team, and Maki probably owes it to her girlfriend to at least give her a chance.

She casts her gaze dubiously back to the other side of the room, where Nico Yazawa is waiting. The diminutive girl still looks lost and dejected, like a small puppy that’s just been kicked by its owner. Now that Maki thinks about it, there’s no way someone so volatile and ill-mannered could last long in Tsubasa’s employ anyway. Sure, she has no idea how skilled this Yazawa is, but judging by her behavior, she seems entirely unprofessional. Maki’s confident that Tsubasa will be searching for someone better within two weeks.

She sighs and slumps her shoulders in resignation. “Fine. But just so you know, I think it’s a terrible idea.”

Tsubasa presses a quick kiss to Maki’s cheek. “I _knew_ you’d come around.” Before Maki can respond, her girlfriend is already striding back over to Yazawa, pulling Maki along with her. “Sorry to keep you waiting!”

Maki notes with some satisfaction that the Yazawa’s eyes zero in on their intertwined fingers as they approach. She makes a point of squeezing tighter.

Surprisingly, though, Yazawa doesn’t make a scene. She takes a very visible deep breath, then plasters on the most artificial smile Maki’s ever seen in her life.

“Not at all,” she simpers. “And can I just say again what an _honor_ this is. Thank you _so_ much for this opportunity. I can’t wait to work with you and your… girlfriend.”

Tsubasa cocks an eyebrow at Maki, as if to say _See? She’s harmless!_ and Maki just shakes her head. She can’t believe Tsubasa, who’s usually so discerning, has been fooled so easily. She almost wants to ask the nosy receptionist to back her up, but the woman’s eyes are studiously glued to her computer screen. At least _she's_ enjoying herself. She’s plainly biting back laughter.

“We're thrilled to have you here,” Tsubasa says. “Right Maki?”

But Maki’s not compromising on this one. She came here as a favor to Tsubasa, not to make nice with some obsessed fan of her girlfriend. She simply scowls in a way that she hopes shows her complete opposition to this turn of events.

There’s an awkward pause that stretches on just long enough for Tsubasa to realize that Maki doesn’t plan on agreeing. She clears her throat and begins guiding them towards a room down the hall. “Come on! Let’s take this into my office. We have a lot to discuss.”

They file inside. Yazawa abandons her superficially polite facade momentarily for an expression of genuine delight as she enters, looking as excited as an elementary school student on a field trip. Maki’s been here several times before, but even she has to admit that the office is always impressive, with a wide view of the surrounding buildings, multiple prestigious awards hung on the walls, and an expensive mahogany desk. Maki’s pleased to see that Tsubasa’s added a small, framed photo of her to the various small knick knacks sitting on her computer stand.

She reluctantly takes a seat next to Yazawa as Tsubasa walks around to the other side of the desk and removes some papers from a drawer. Maki watches her as she flicks through them, once, then twice. She frowns and flicks through them again.

“Oh, you’re kidding...” Tsubasa mutters. She laughs and shakes her head. “It only printed out half of Nico’s contract. I promise I’m usually way more organized than this… just give me like one minute, I’m so sorry-”

Maki tries to catch her eye and shake her head but Tsubasa dashes out of the room and Maki wants to laugh and cry and scream all at once. She stares down at her lap, because she knows where making eye contact got her last time.

Yazawa’s the first to break the silence.

“So,” she says, and the nervousness in her voice is palpable. “I think we got off on the wrong foot…”

Maybe that would have placated Maki earlier, but it’s too late. Yazawa’s already shown her true colors, and Maki’s never been a bad judge of character. She crosses her arms pointedly.

“Let’s get one thing straight. I’m only doing this for Tsubasa.” Not that she even really wants to. The more she learns about this campaign, the worse it gets. It’s unfair to her girlfriend, she knows, but Maki feels like she’s somehow been scammed into agreeing. She shakes the thought away and makes a show of examining her nails. “We’re clearly not going to get along, so don’t even bother. You just do your job, and I’ll do mine.”

Yazawa's expression darkens immediately. “Why are you such a-” She stops herself and glances nervously towards the door. Then she sighs and slumps down in her seat. “Whatever. Fine by me.”

They lapse into silence once more. Maki examines her nails again, desperately trying to listen out for the distant sound of the printer in the reception area whirring into action. She can't believe Tsubasa would just leave her alone with this monster.

“You know,” Yazawa says suddenly. Maki looks over at her involuntarily. “We're going to have to work together for a long time.”

Maki rolls her eyes. “Your point?”

“It'd be better for us if we could just get along.”

Maki sneers at the very thought. As if she could ever “get along” with someone so infuriating. But, deep down, she knows that Yazawa is right. Which is even more annoying.

“You probably won't last that long anyway," she says defensively. "And then Tsubasa can find a _real_ professional.”

Yazawa frowns. Her whole body goes taut, like she’s gearing up for a fight. “Excuse me?”

“You're just some beauty advisor from the mall, right?” Maki crosses her legs as she warms to her argument. “There's no way you'll be able to keep up. My _girlfriend_ ,” she relishes the way Yazawa cringes at the word, “has high standards. She'll drop you in a heartbeat once she realizes you're not good enough - if you don't quit first.” She sits back in the chair smugly, awaiting the other girl's reaction.

For a moment, Yazawa looks like she's about to burst into tears. Her eyes grow wide and her lower lip trembles, and Maki feels a sudden rush of guilt. Yazawa looks down at her lap and Maki wonders what Tsubasa will say when she comes back and finds her new makeup artist sobbing. She shouldn't have said that. Maybe she took that last bit a little too far...

“Hey, Uh...” Maki reaches out her hand tentatively, in hope that an awkward, comforting pat on the shoulder might stop this from becoming some big exhausting drama. “I - I didn’t _mean…_ ”

Yazawa jerks back as soon as Maki's fingers collide with her jacket. She brushes the gesture off effortlessly, and when their eyes meet, Maki almost shivers. Any hint of hurt or uncertainty is gone. There's a fierce determination in Yazawa’s gaze that makes Maki shift back in her seat.

“I’m not going to quit,” Yazawa says, her voice strong and unwavering. “I don’t care how grouchy and stuck up you are. This is the best opportunity I've ever had and I'm not backing down. I’m going to hide those dark circles under your eyes and highlight those pretty cheekbones and you’re going to look so gorgeous that no one will ever _dream_ of dropping me from this campaign.”

“Wait,” Maki touches her face self-consciously. “What do you mean _dark circles_ -”

“If _you_ want to leave, then go right ahead, and if not then listen up: I’m not a quitter. I’m Nico Yazawa - the number one makeup artist - and nothing you say is gonna stop me from signing that contract, so you can go ahead and deal with that, _Maki_.”

Something about the way that Yazawa says her name gets under Maki’s skin. She could challenge Yazawa about who gave her the right to use it so carelessly, but her throat hurts. Her mouth is dry. She’s too exhausted to fight anymore.

“Of all the people Tsubasa could have chosen,” she groans, pinching the bridge of her nose in an attempt to curtail her growing headache, “why did it have to be you?”

Nico sounds equally despondent. “Trust me. I'm not exactly thrilled about working with you and your bad attitude either.” She grimaces. “Why someone like Tsubasa is dating someone like _you_ I have no ide-”

Yazawa stops talking abruptly as Tsubasa comes rushing back into the room, holding the missing papers up triumphantly. She _must_ have heard at least some of their conversation, but Tsubasa’s good at focusing on the positives. She’s good at filtering out things that have no place in her well thought out plan.

“Okay,” Tsubasa says, cheerfully. “Who’s ready to get started?”

Maki and Nico simply look at each other. Neither of them make a move to reply.

This is going to be a disaster.

It's going to be a long couple of months.


	2. Foundations

**i.**

This is the best day of Nico's life. There's no doubt about it.  

She arrives early at the company’s private studio, located on the basement floor of the Kira Cosmetics office building, and lets herself in with the shiny white key card Tsubasa had given her at the meeting on Monday. She flicks on the light and gasps when she sees the spacious room, the darkened floodlights, the camera stands already in place. She knows it's overkill to show up more than 30 minutes early, but she can't help herself. And no one will fault her for being excited, right?

Well, maybe one person will. One stuck up, grouchy, irritatingly attractive person who Nico has _not_ been looking forward to meeting again.

But at least she isn't here to dampen the mood yet. At least Nico has this moment.

She does an excited lap of the studio, stopping dead still when she spots the door marked “Dressing Room”. All she can do is stare. This is it. This is where she belongs. And yet despite the explicit permission she’d been given to enter, Nico can't help but feel intimidated. It's only one tiny step, one effortless twist of the door handle, and yet something about it seems scary. Nico takes a breath. If she could stand up to Tsubasa's terrible girlfriend, then surely she can handle a slab of fancy mahogany.

Nico pushes open the door and she can’t resist letting out a squeal of delight. It's even better than she imagined. She feels like she's behind the scenes on a movie set as she admires her adorable reflection in the huge mirror that's surrounded by twinkling light bulbs. And the makeup! Nico works in a Kira Cosmetics store five days a week and she's still overwhelmed by the outstanding selection on offer.

Her heart skips a beat when she spots an especially fancy case that’s been set aside. She approaches it reverently, hardly daring to breath. Could it be? With trembling hands, she takes and reads the attached sticky note.

_We’ll primarily be using the new line for this campaign. Feel free to give it a whirl! Love, Tsubasa._

Nico all but collapses onto the plush, comfortable sofa sitting in the center of the room. She reads the note three times in a row, admiring Tsubasa’s neat, elegant handwriting. She still can’t believe that Tsubasa Kira herself _personally_ asked her to do makeup for this campaign. And she gets to be one of the first people to test out a brand new line of products. Nico gazes at the elegantly packaged makeup laid out before her and she knows that nothing will ever be better than this. She doesn't have much time, but she can probably test a few things out for entirely selfless research purposes.

Tsubasa mentioned that her new campaign would center around the resilience of the makeup - how you could wear it anywhere, do anything and it would never smudge. Nico dabs some shimmering taupe colored eyeshadow on the back of her hand, and it's impressive, really, how Tsubasa didn't exaggerate. She rubs at the streak and it barely even smears. That’s the work of a true genius right there. Nico can’t resist uncapping the liquid eyeliner to try that out too.

Nico’s taking a photo in the mirror to send to Nozomi, her mama and her sisters when she hears the studio door opening. She jumps and her heart speeds up and then she remembers that she’s not trespassing. That she’s actually allowed to be here. Nico checks her reflection (perfect makeup and a dress that says ‘cute’ _and_ ‘ready to impress’ - easily a solid 10) and she strolls towards the door, eager to make a good impression on whichever crew member has arrived first.

She hurries out of the dressing room, thoroughly prepared with a cheerful smile and a sophisticated swish of her hair, but when she steps into the studio, she finds herself face to face with the last person on the planet she wanted to see.

The smile falls from her face.

Maki Nishikino takes a full step back. The takeaway cup in her hand slips and she makes a scrambling effort not to drop it, steadying her grip on it just in time. Nico doesn’t know why she looks so surprised. _Surely_ she made it pretty clear that she wasn’t going to quit. A frown forms on Maki’s face. Nico’s starting to think that she’s incapable of any other expression.

“I didn't think anyone was here yet,” Maki says awkwardly, adjusting the lid on her coffee cup. “I’ll, uh… I’ll go wait upstairs with Tsubasa.”

“No!” Nico says, quickly. She fixes her smile back in place and gestures towards the spacious studio. “It’s fine if you want to… I mean, don’t let me stop you…”

Maki looks at Nico's outstretched arm and she crinkles her nose in distaste.

“You have mud on your hand,” she says. “Make sure you wash them before you start on my makeup.”

“Mud?” Nico stares down her hand. By the time she’s worked out that it's makeup, Maki’s already turned and opened the studio door.

“It's eyeshadow!” Nico calls after Maki, but she doesn't turn back.

Nico curses under her breath as she hears the elevator chime. She storms back into the dressing room, rattling open drawers in search of the makeup remover she spotted earlier. She huffs as she wipes furiously at the back of her hand. She _was_ going to try and make an effort to be civil, but that's clearly going to be tougher than she thought. She still can’t believe that Tsubasa could be dating such a horrible person.

Sure, Maki is pretty, there’s no denying that. In fact, she’s so pretty that it kind of pisses Nico off. Her skin is smooth and her hair frames her face perfectly and she carries herself with this annoying confidence that makes it totally clear to the whole world that she _knows_ that she's hot. Nico's only surprised that she's never heard of Nishikino before; she follows all the major fashion magazines religiously, yet the name's never come up. Maybe she's a new model? Either way, Nico can't deny that when she stands next to Tsubasa, the couple practically _radiates_ power.

But good looks hardly make up for personality, and Maki may just be the rudest person she’s ever met. And that’s including all the customers at the mall who don’t buy anything after getting a free makeover.

Nico hears muffled voices outside the door and she takes a deep, calming breath. Now’s not the time to get all hung up over some model with terrible social skills. She has a job to do. She has the chance to impress the CEO of the greatest cosmetics company in the world!

She strides confidently out of the dressing room and finds both Tsubasa and Maki in the studio, along with a tall, vaguely foreign-looking woman with blonde hair. Nico gets the impression that she’s seen her before, but she can’t put her finger on why her face is so familiar.

“Nico!” Tsubasa notices her approach and waves enthusiastically. “I’m sorry, did we keep you waiting?”

Nico's never going to get over how radiant her smile is. “Not at all, I just got here,” she lies, even though she's spent the last half an hour in makeup heaven.

“That's a relief.” Tsubasa turns to the blonde woman and gestures between them. “I'd like to introduce you to Eli Ayase. She's the best photographer I know, and we're very lucky to have her on board for this campaign.”

 _Of course_. Nico should've recognized her immediately! Eli Ayase - internationally renowned for her prestigious, high fashion photography and her artistic eye. Nico’s hands start to shake. She's starstruck all over again just standing before her.

“It's such a pleasure to meet you!” Nico bows down low. “Your work is _amazing_! That magazine spread with the couture ballet fashion line? _So_ good I almost cried. The way you captured their movements was so-”

Nico tenses up. She can feel everyone watching her. She’s totally doing that over-excited babbling thing again, but she can't help it. She's elated to be in the presence of genuine fashion royalty! It'd be an arrestable offense to just overlook Eli's talents.

Eli dips her head good-naturedly. “You flatter me,” she laughs. “Tsubasa’s the real genius. But it’s nice to know I have a fan.”

“Totally!” Nico giggles, her fingers twisting at the straps of her small bag. She knows she shouldn't ask. She knows she should be professional, but life has presented her with such a wonderful opportunity. It'd be super ungrateful to just ignore it, right? She unzips her bag and runs her fingers over the smooth notebook she keeps inside.

“T-This might sound strange, but…” She pulls the notebook from her bag and holds it out in front of her. “Could I get your autograph?”

Someone snorts. Loudly, derisively. Nico swivels her head around, just in time to catch Maki raising her coffee cup up to her lips in a poor attempt at hiding a smirk. Nico feels insulted on Eli's behalf. She’s a rising superstar. Nico’s reaction is only natural. Why isn’t _Maki_ asking for her autograph too?

Nico makes a show of finding an empty page, taking time to flip past her small but impressive collection that she's gathered from various meet and greets.

“Here,” she says, with a pointed glance at Maki. She slides her finger over the heart her idol had drawn underneath her most recent signature and beams. “Right next to Tsubasa’s.”

Eli looks mildly bewildered as she takes the notebook.

“This is kind of new for me,” she says, and Nico can hardly believe that. Eli Ayase is a legend! She's surprised people aren't stopping her on the streets on a daily basis. “But it's very nice of you to ask…”

“Why don't you get Maki's autograph too?” There's a wide grin on Tsubasa’s face as she suggests it. “Since it’s her first time modelling.”

“No way,” says Maki.

“No thanks,” blurts Nico at the exact same time.

A thick silence settles between all four of them. Maki has the nerve to look insulted. As if Nico would ever let someone like that sully her sacred autograph collection!

Eli hands the notebook back and Nico wants to press it close to her chest and soak up the creative power these signatures hold, but she should also probably focus on actually doing her job and - wait.

“ _Wait,_ ” Nico says, turning to look at Maki. “It’s your first time modelling? But I thought-”

Maki crosses her arms tightly across her chest and Nico stares at her in disbelief. She’s not a model? No, that can't be right. Nico follows more than two hundred _professional_ models across various social media sites, and while most of them (if not _all_ of them) are nicer than Maki, there’s no denying that she'd fit right in alongside any of them in a magazine spread. It’s early in the morning and she’s clearly wearing no makeup, a simple shirt and a pair of shorts, and yet somehow she looks so _polished_. How is she _not_ a model?

“It's a long story,” Maki says, flatly. She shoots a look of pure irritation at Tsubasa, who winces as if she just realized she’s made a mistake.

“...Okay!” Tsubasa claps her hands together, clearly eager to change the subject.  “Are you ready to start, Nico?”

“Oh, uh, yeah!” Nico bobs her head automatically. “Definitely?”

“Great, great.” Tsubasa nods at Eli. “Why don’t you get set up? Just some simple beauty shots today, nothing special. The usual lighting should be enough.” The photographer hums in acknowledgement and turns to set her equipment down.

Tsubasa elaborates on the shoot as Nico and a reluctant Maki follow her towards the dressing room. “We’re just doing a test shoot today, to get a feel for how we all work. This might be a little different from what you’re used to in most photoshoots-” She stops and chuckles before she corrects herself. Nico tries not to feel self-conscious. “We do things a little differently from industry standard. It’s a collaborative process. Obviously, I have a vision for what I want the campaign to look like - but today, you’ll have free reign, so just concentrate on what _you_ think is best.”

Nico nods, trying not to let the pressure get to her. She can do this. Her customers _always_ leave feeling happy. And she’s probably watched more makeup tutorials than anyone else on the planet.

“Take a seat, Maki,” Tsubasa gestures towards the chair and Maki moves tentatively towards it. Nico's never seen someone take so much time to walk approximately ten steps forward. “I'm going to leave you in Nico’s capable hands while I go down to wardrobe and find you something pretty to wear.”

“What?” Maki says, standing up again. “I thought you were going to stay?”

Tsubasa's fingers brush briefly over Maki's shoulder and she nudges her back down into the seat. “I'll be back soon. Behave yourself, okay?” She grins and leans closer, whispering something into Maki's ear that makes her promptly flush pink.

Maki looks tongue-tied for once as she twists in her seat and watches her girlfriend move fluidly across the small dressing room. Tsubasa pauses at the door and looks back over her shoulder.

“She's all yours, Nico,” she winks.

And then she’s gone. The door falls closed behind her. In the wake of her absence, all Nico can think is how much she doesn't want Maki. Tsubasa can keep her, thank you.

But she does have a job to do. She has important people to impress and there's no way she’s going to let an insufferable girl who’s not even a real model hold her back from achieving her full potential.

“Right.” Nico opens a drawer, rustling around for something to start with. Moisturizer. Primer. _Anything._ She does this all day, every day. She's extremely confident in her skills, so why are her hands all shaky? “Right,” she repeats. “Do you mind if I-”

“Is the mud gone?” Maki asks, flatly.

The primer in Nico's hand clatters onto the table and she scrambles to pick it up. “What?”

“Are your hands clean?” Maki asks, her tone slow and patronizing, like she's talking to a small child.

“Of course they are! And I told you it was _eyeshadow_! You-” Nico takes a breath. She turns to face Maki, a bright, beaming smile on her face. “Nico's going to work her magic now,” she says in her sweetest tone. “So sit back and relax. In fact, feel free to be absolutely silent.”

Nico leans back and looks at Maki - humming softly as she examines her pretty features and makes mental notes about what she'd like to do. It unnerves her a little, how the redhead gazes unflinchingly, almost defiantly back at her. Most people get weirded out having a stranger so close to their face and avoid eye contact. But apparently, not this girl.

“Stop staring at me.”

The brusque command surprises Nico into looking away first.

“I'm working! It's part of my process!” she insists, forcing herself to meet Maki's gaze again.

“It's annoying.”

Nico's about to reply, but her attention is drawn to the movement of Maki's mouth. She knows the perfect color to match those lips, and that’s all it takes for her to focus again. She works at the _mall_. She can handle a bad attitude and lack of manners. She does that every day.

“Get used to it,” Nico says briskly. “Now give me your hand.”

“W-What?” Maki looks scandalized.

“We’ll start,” Nico chirps, sliding into her usual customer service mode, “with a spectacular two-in-one primer that lays the perfect base for your-” She pauses. That’s right. She’s not actually trying to make a sale here. “Put this on your face,” she orders flatly instead, pouring some into Maki’s open hand.

Maki rolls her eyes and begins dabbing it on her skin. Right away, Nico realizes her mistake. She thought it would be easier to make her do it herself than to risk getting snapped at for invading her personal space but… Maki’s doing it all wrong. It’s all uneven and careless. If Nico didn’t know any better, she’d think that Maki’s never watched a makeup tutorial in her life.

Impossible, of course. Surely being aware of basic makeup technique is a _requirement_ for dating Tsubasa Kira of Kira Cosmetics. Maybe she’s being insolent and heavy handed on purpose. Either way, she’s going to aggravate her skin before they even get started if Nico doesn’t stop her.

“Not like that!” Maki freezes. “You need to be _gentle._ Can I just-” Nico reaches out a hand automatically to take Maki’s chin like she would for any other customer, but Maki jerks her head away.

“No. I can do it myself,” she huffs, and it takes all the willpower in Nico’s body to resist sighing in frustration.

“Look, can you just let me do my job?” she snaps. It comes out harsher than she expects it to, but she’s past the point of caring. “I know you don't like me, but I do this for a living. I'm supposed to make you look _good_ , so just make it easier for both of us and stop resisting.”

Maki considers her suspiciously. Nico can almost see the gears turning in her head as she weighs up the options. She exhales in relief when Maki eventually inclines her head in a fraction of a nod.

“Just make it quick.”

Maki visibly tenses, bracing herself as though Nico's about to do something terrible. From her over-dramatic reaction, you'd think Nico was about to pour an ice cold bucket of water on her or something (though, just saying, Nico probably would enjoy that.)

“You can't rush art,” Nico mutters. Then she quickly gets to work again, before Maki can change her mind.

Maki’s skin is soft. That’s the first thing Nico thinks when she feels it under her fingertips. The second thing she thinks is how much it pisses her off, that Maki's skin tone is so naturally smooth and free from blemishes. Everything after that is just further annoyance at Maki’s general attitude as she sits stoically and resumes her intimidating stare. Nico tries not to let it bother her. This is fine. This isn’t weird. This isn’t awkward at all. Maki’s just another customer, albeit an excessively grumpy one who also happens to be romantically entangled with Nico’s hero.

“You know,” Nico ventures finally, because she’s a naturally friendly person and honestly the complete lack of conversation is beginning to creep her out, “you should ask Tsubasa for a bottle of this. I think it'd really improve the condition of your skin if you used it every day.”

Maki frowns and Nico knows immediately that she's said the wrong thing. _Of course_. If Nico told her she was stunningly beautiful, she'd probably still find a way to take it as an insult. (Not that Nico ever _would_ say that. Just, you know. Theoretically.)

Maki narrows her eyes. “What’s wrong my skin?”

“Nothing,” Nico says, quickly. She turns away to grab a brush and the prototype of the long-lasting foundation that will launch with the campaign. “It's just… well. Moisturizer is your friend, you know?”

“I moisturize,” Maki protests, touching her face defensively.

Nico snorts and bats her hand away. “How often? Like once a month?”

The foundation is the perfect match for Maki’s skin tone. Nico can’t help but think that it would apply a lot more smoothly if she stopped glaring.

“I moisturize,” Maki says, again. “I just have other priorities in life. I’m... busy.”

“With what?” Nico asks. “What do you even _do_?”

“I’m a lab technician.”

“ _Oh._ ” Nico wasn’t expecting that. “So like… a fancy scientist with goggles and a white coat?”

Maki rolls her eyes. “If you want to dumb it down to your level, then yes. That's exactly what I do.”

Nico swipes her makeup brush a little too roughly. “I was taking an interest!”

“I'd rather you didn't. Just stop talking.”

“Fine!” Nico presses her lips tightly together.

There’s a heavy silence. Nico's going to make a playlist of upbeat music as soon as she gets home. She imagines blasting it out at the next photoshoot, turning the volume up higher every time Maki makes a negative comment until her voice has been drowned out completely.

“Can you move your head a little-”

“That counts as talking.”

Nico prods Maki’s head sideways with a sharp finger instead, and Maki makes an over-dramatic sound of protest.

Nico growls in frustration. “I’m not psychic! What else do you expect me to do?”

The other girl takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly, as if _she’s_ the one whose patience is being tested. “Just get this over with.”

“I’m _trying_ to,” Nico snaps back, and uncaps the concealer. Judging by the bags under Maki’s eyes, she’s going to need a _lot_ of it.

Eventually, Nico gets into the groove of things. Setting aside the location, the range of products available, and of course her irascible client, this isn’t too much different from her normal duties at the mall. She does have to keep in mind that this isn’t a normal makeover, that Maki’s face is getting done up specifically to be photographed, but that presents an interesting challenge more than anything else. She works efficiently, settling into her usual routine like clockwork.

She's not sure if it's the amazing products or her own skill or a killer combo of both, but the blusher and the highlighter apply perfectly. Of course, Maki’s natural beauty might help a little too. But any success here is mostly down to the wonderful talents of Nico and Tsubasa. Seriously, this new line might be Kira Cosmetics’ best yet. Maybe if Nico does a _really_ good job she might be allowed to take a set home when the campaign is over.

Nico’s in the process of finishing up on Maki’s eyes (she doesn’t like to flatter herself, but she’s _sure_ the wings on Maki’s eyeliner are the sharpest she’s ever drawn) when a firm knock surprises them both. Thankfully, Nico's skilled at keeping a steady hand and she doesn't smudge the perfect eye makeup or prod Maki in the head with the mascara wand. The door swings open and Tsubasa comes waltzing back in with clothes draped over her arm.

“I’m back!” she calls, her voice cheerful. “How are we doing here?”

Maki lets out a soft, dissatisfied grunt. “About time. You took forever.”

Nico’s about to make a snide comment about how that isn’t any way to speak to your girlfriend -  except it’s hard not to notice the way that Maki’s shoulders relax, just the tiniest bit, at the sight of Tsubasa. It’s the first time she considers that maybe, just _maybe_ , Maki isn’t as bothered by Nico’s presence as she is by the whole modelling situation in general. Nico can kind of sympathize with that. This is her first time doing a photoshoot too, not counting all the hours she’s spent being the adorable lead model in _many_ solo selfie sessions.

So she bites back any unprofessional comments and remembers her manners. She straightens up and flashes her teeth.

“It's going great! Maki and I are getting along _really_ well!”

Maki's forehead wrinkles as she looks up at Nico incredulously. Nico firmly ignores her and continues to beam at Tsubasa. Sure, she might be exaggerating just a tiny bit, but hey, progress is progress.

Tsubasa glances at Maki for confirmation as she lays the clothes down. Nico braces herself for the worst, but Maki just shrugs. Tsubasa seems satisfied with that. She leans back against the sofa and examines the two of them thoughtfully. Nico feels like her entire life's work is being judged. It’s super nerve wracking. She holds her breath.

“You've done a good job,” Tsubasa says, after a long moment where Nico's heart almost beats out of her chest. “Maki looks great.”

Nico sighs out a breath of relief. “I think so too! I know it's kind of a natural look but I really hope it'll translate well on camera and I - oh. Look up again, Maki.”

Nico almost faints on the spot when Maki actually does as she's told without a single protest. She picks up the mascara and nods reassuringly at Tsubasa. _See_. They're not snapping at each other constantly. In fact, they’re practically the best of friends.

Tsubasa moves in for a better look while she’s working on the finishing touches. Nico worries at her lower lip and tries to focus, but it’s a little difficult when Maki’s so tense and the CEO of her favorite brand in the entire world is lingering so close to her shoulder. Nico concentrates harder than she ever did in school and prays that she’s making a good impression. Thankfully, Tsubasa seems to approve.

“I love what you’ve done with the eyeshadow. It’s blended so well.”

Nico’s chest swells with a burst of pride. “Really? I’m so glad! I used a lighter, almost golden color for the base since Maki’s got very striking, very prett- uh, _nice_ eyes, so I wanted the eyeshadow to enhance them. Make them stand out, you know?” She runs the brush against Maki’s eyelashes. It’s annoying, how naturally long they are. “Then I mixed in a darker shade, and just a touch of glitter to really make it shine.”

Tsubasa nods knowingly, and if Nico were the presumptuous type she _might_ just assume that she looks impressed. The prospect fills her with giddiness. This is still probably the best day of her life. This whole thing is _so_ worth it, even if she has to deal with Maki Nishikino.

“There. I think-” Nico takes a step back. She has to be confident. Now’s not the time to doubt herself. She looks at Maki’s face and she nods. “I’m all done.”

Maki turns her head towards the mirror. Tsubasa hovers over her shoulder, leaning close to Maki, examining her reflection alongside her.  

Maki's eyes widen in soft surprise. Nico braces herself for some dissatisfied comment, but for once, Maki doesn't say anything. She just looks and looks, her mouth turning down in a small, confused frown as she tilts her head from side to side. Her frown subsides eventually, and if Nico didn't know better, she'd almost think there was the smallest hint of a smile on her pretty pink lips. But she does know better. Based on her knowledge of Maki, it’s probably safe to assume that she imagined it completely.

Tsubasa claps her hands decisively. “Okay! So Kotori couldn’t make it in today, but we’re just going to go with Maki’s natural hair since it’s a test shoot so… I think we’re pretty much good to go!”

“Wait. Is that… okay?” Nico asks. “You don’t want me to change anything or - or like-”

Tsubasa shakes her head. “Don’t change a thing. I love what you've done. Now-” She extends her hand to Maki and pulls her up to her feet. “Let’s get you dressed! I brought a few options over to try so-”

Tsubasa pushes Maki’s shirt up. Nico sees a glimpse of her smooth, pale stomach and her cheeks burn instantly. She really doesn't mean to look, it just kind of happens. She doesn't have time to look away.

“What are you doing!” Maki squeaks and tugs her shirt back down. She folds her arms tightly across her chest, glaring sharply at Nico as though _she_ was the one who just tried to undress her.

Tsubasa blinks, puzzled. Then realization dawns on her.  “ _Oh_. Sorry. I’m just so used to the other models-” She lifts her hands away in a placating gesture and chuckles. “Guess I’d better save that kind of thing for when we're at home, huh?”

Maki blushes so hard that it shows through the makeup. Nico isn’t far behind. When she imagined herself becoming best friends with Tsubasa, involuntarily picturing her being intimate with her girlfriend never exactly came up.

“I’ll just-” Nico points towards the door. “I’ll, uh - wait out there.”

Nico moves faster than she ever has before. She propels herself out of the dressing room and into the studio, only stopping to catch her breath once the door has closed firmly behind her. She's sure that models undressing in front of makeup artists is pretty common in this industry and yet... she can’t help but feel super awkward for intruding on a moment that she really shouldn’t have.

“Are they almost done?”

Nico jumps and turns towards the soft voice. _Right._ Eli. Nico totally forgot she was out here. She looks effortlessly cool, sitting on one of the folding chairs, messing around with a camera. She’d turned on some of the floodlights and rearranged a few tripods while they were gone, but she’s clearly been waiting a while. Nico says a quick prayer that the dressing room walls are soundproof. She wants to make a good impression, and it'd be beyond mortifying if Eli heard her fighting with Maki.

“I think so!” Nico squeaks. “They’re just undress-uh, finding something for Maki to wear. So, yeah. Um. Shouldn’t be long now.”  

Eli nods and flashes that brilliant smile and Nico feels her cheeks get hotter. Is _everyone_ in the fashion industry ridiculously hot? Eli’s not exactly her type, but those blue eyes have probably charmed more than their fair share of unwitting civilians.

“Tsubasa mentioned that this is your first gig. How are you feeling?” Her tone is kind and reassuring, and Nico’s relieved to hear no judgement in it.

“A little nervous,” Nico admits. She takes a seat when Eli gestures for her to sit down. “I mean, I’ve been doing makeup pretty much my whole life but…”

“This is different,” Eli finishes for her sympathetically. She pats Nico’s shoulder. “Well, don’t worry too much. Tsubasa thinks very highly of you. She told me that you’re a perfect fit for this project, so… just try and enjoy it, alright?”

Nico nods. “T-Thanks.”

Eli is definitely a lot more approachable than she seemed at first glance. Nico’s just gearing herself up to ask her about the creative vision behind one of her more controversial photoshoots when the door swings open. They both snap to attention and rise out of their chairs.

“Presenting... supermodel Maki Nishikino!” Tsubasa calls out. She rushes through the door moments later, tugging Maki behind her.

Nico’s mouth drops open.

“Wow,” Eli says. “You look great.”

‘Great’ is an understatement. Maki looks _gorgeous_. She looks like fashion royalty in a designer summer dress that fits her perfectly, highlighting every curve of her body. Under the darker lighting of the studio, Nico’s makeup work accentuates the brightness of her eyes, the color in her cheeks. She can’t even begin to deny that Maki is perfectly suited to modelling. If Nico saw her on the front cover of a magazine, she’d want that dress, that lipstick. If she saw her online, she’d hit follow instantly. And if she saw her in a bar then… no. _Gross_. Even in a hypothetical world, she'd never try and flirt with such a haughty princess.

Nico’s still staring when Maki makes eye contact. It’s so sudden that Nico can’t help but jolt a little. Her heart flips uncomfortably in her chest as she holds the model’s sharp, unwavering gaze. What the hell is Maki’s _problem_? Nico feels totally paralyzed. She can’t look away.

“Doesn’t she?” Tsubasa agrees, breaking the spell. She takes Maki’s arm and leads under the lights, so she’s standing in front of the camera. “It’s finally time to get started.”

Nico watches Maki tug at the hem of her short skirt and she looks so nervous that Nico almost feels sorry for her. But she probably has nothing to worry about. Maki’s definitely one of those annoyingly photogenic people that looks good from every angle. Even knowing how awful her personality is, Nico kind of wants her to do well. But only because she wants Tsubasa and Eli to be happy.

“I’m just going to take a few test shots,” Eli says. Her camera flashes and it’s super exciting. Nico’s never been this close to a real photoshoot before. She inches closer and she’s wondering if she’s allowed to snap a few memories with her phone when Tsubasa approaches her and pats her firmly on the shoulder.

“Great job today, Nico. No need to stick around! We’ll be in touch when we confirm the dates for the next shoot.”

“Oh! But I thought-” Nico bites her lip. She can’t believe she almost tried to argue with Tsubasa Kira. “Right! Yeah. I guess I better get going and get to my real job.” She laughs.

Nico doesn’t know why she feels kind of disappointed. Of course she can’t stick around all day. She has a long shift and a _lot_ to tell Nozomi between customers. Besides, she doesn't want to be a distraction. She might have been granted an all access pass to this sparkling world, but that doesn't mean that she belongs here. Nico gathers her things together and heads towards the door. Tsubasa’s attention is already back on shoot.

“Now, I want both close-up shots and a few full-body ones. We want to emphasize how this line will _complement_ , not overshadow…”

Nico wonders if it’s too late to thank Tsubasa again for the opportunity. She allows herself one last curious glance in Maki’s direction. And just like before, Maki glares right back.

Nico feels a hot flash of irritation. She _might_ have been the bigger person and offered a supportive thumbs up, but if that’s the way that Maki wants to play it, then Nico’s totally fine with that. Sometimes, there’s a bump or two in the road to your dreams coming true. And though Maki Nishikino might be a particularly annoying hurdle, no grouchy model is going to stop Nico from enjoying every moment of this amazing opportunity.

“Eyes to the camera,” Eli says, firmly. Maki turns to face the lenses with a haughty flick of her hair.

Nico bows once more before taking her leave. Tsubasa's too in her element to notice, and Nico pauses on the way out to admire the commanding way she directs the photographer into action.

But the lingering thought on her mind as she exits the company studio and walks towards the elevator isn't of Tsubasa, pointing an elegant finger and describing her vision for the next photo.

For some reason, she can only picture Maki, standing there under the floodlights with her signature scowl on her flawless face.   

And out of all of the strange things that have happened lately, that might just be the weirdest.

 

 

 

**ii.**

“See you tomorrow.”

Maki pushes through the door and out into the brisk night air. It’s been awhile since she’s stayed late at the lab like this. With the work mostly finished on their latest project, there hasn’t been much to do recently but wait around for funding approval. Which makes it the perfect time, unfortunately, to moonlight as a model.

She feels her brow furrow at the mere thought of the campaign. If there’s one thing she's learned over the last few weeks, it's that nine hours hunched over the bench in her lab is _infinitely_ less stressful than thirty minutes in front of the camera. Maki makes an effort to relax the muscles in her face. Tsubasa always makes fun of her for looking too serious. She says she should smile more before she “scares any nearby children.”

Maki can’t help it, though. She gazes gloomily at her reflection in the rearview mirror as she starts up her car and backs out of the parking space.

She didn’t think this whole campaign thing would drag out for so long. She’d hoped she could just turn up and look pretty and it would all be over within a couple of hours. Maki knows that Tsubasa spends her entire working week doing this stuff, but she didn't realize how much time she spends fussing over unnecessary details. How many endless discussions about lighting and lipstick shades she'd have to listen to. How much thought they’d give to things that hold no significance in the real world.

And the worst part is that, despite how much she’d emphasized the whole “spending time together” thing, Tsubasa isn't even _there_ most of the time. Maki drags herself diligently to the studio twice a week and gives up _two whole hours_ of her life per session, and yet ever since the first shoot, Tsubasa's been too busy to spend more than a few minutes on set. She’s dropped by to offer varying excuses - explaining that they’re in the middle of some intense negotiations for a new overseas deal or that there’s a social media crisis she has to deal with right away. And each time, Maki’s felt more and more _irritated_.

She isn't the type to be clingy or possessive. She understands that Tsubasa is busy. But Maki made time in her _own_ hectic schedule to fit those sessions in, and she can't help but feel like she's been cheated out of the quality bonding time her girlfriend had definitely promised.

Tsubasa didn't even show up at all the last time. Her receptionist had discreetly handed Maki an apologetic letter written in that familiar, flowing script when she arrived, which surely undermines the whole concept of the project. What’s the point of Maki even being there if her girlfriend doesn’t bother to show up? Why should Maki make the effort when the only person waiting for her when she arrives on set is that exasperating makeup artist?

Just the memory of her existence stirs a rush of annoyance in Maki’s chest. She flips through the radio channels, stopping when she finds a song that's soft and soothing, and she focuses on the melody until it calms her. She promised herself that she wouldn't waste any more of her energy thinking about that irritating Tsubasa-worshipper outside of those painful hours that they're forced to spend together. When she’s on set, however, she's perfectly happy to make her dislike of Nico Yazawa very, very apparent.

Without Tsubasa there to move her along, Nico’s been outstaying her welcome on set, sticking around for longer and longer after every session to fawn over Eli’s photography technique. She’s failed to pick up on any of the hints Maki dropped that she should leave. In fact, the brat seems to get a special pleasure out of watching her suffer in front of the camera, needling her about how her posture is too stiff or how she really needs to lighten up. And as much as Maki would love to be the bigger person and just ignore her, she can’t.

Something about the way that Nico watches her makes Maki extra conscious of her fumbling movements and her tense expressions. It makes her feel like an amateur, which, sure, okay, she _is_ , but does Nico have to make a big deal out of it all the time? Eli manages to do her job without snide remarks about how _real_ models would never take so long to find the perfect “smolder” or “smize.” It might sound a little arrogant, but Maki's used to being good at things. She's not used to being treated like an unintelligent novice. And the only person she's doing this for - the lone reason she's suffering through all this - doesn't even have ten minutes to spare to check in on her?    

Tsubasa has a lot to answer for. And Maki plans to make her discontent clear when she returns from her latest business trip. But for now she plans to drive home, grab her favorite takeout and enjoy a peaceful evening alone. She's got a surprisingly accurate, if not overly dramatic, medical drama to catch up on. The pleasant thought of it is enough to lighten her mood for the rest of the drive home. In fact, she's looking forward to it so much that when she finally stumbles through the front entrance to their home and sees a familiar pair of flats lined up neatly at the door, she feels an odd mix of disappointment and annoyance.

She hears the sound of clattering in the kitchen and the melody of a soft voice humming. Her takeout feels heavy in her hands as she makes her way towards the noise.

It feels like the first time in a long while that she's seen Tsubasa dressed in something other than business attire. Maki knows she’d never be caught dead in that baggy old sweater and tacky apron in front of her admirers. It should be a heartwarming sight, coming home to her girlfriend cooking dinner, and Maki hates herself for feeling agitated by it. Sure, her dreams of a peaceful evening might have slipped away, but she shouldn't be so ungrateful. She should be happy. Tsubasa sweeps some vegetables from the chopping board into the pan. Maki clears her throat and steps into the kitchen.

“Hey,” she says.

“Oh,” Tsubasa jumps back from her cooking in surprise. “You scared me. I didn’t know you were home!”

“That's what I was going to say,” Maki says. “When did you-”

“We wrapped things up a little early, so I flew back in this afternoon!”

“Great.” Maki musters up a smile. “That's… really great.”

She drops her takeout awkwardly down onto the counter. Tsubasa looks towards it and frowns.

“You ordered food?” Her voice is high and overly cheerful. “But I'm already making dinner.”

Maki crosses her arms defensively. “I didn't know you were going to be here.”

“Right. Sorry. I wanted it to be surprise!” Tsubasa turns back to stir her sauce. “Plus, I figured you never check your phone at work anyway…”

“It is,” Maki says. “A surprise, I mean.”

Tsubasa turns her head to smile, and Maki feels a twist of guilt. It’s nice that she's home. And thoughtful of her to make dinner, especially after travelling all day. Maki really should be less selfish. More _appreciative._

She steps behind Tsubasa, leaning down to kiss her cheek. “Welcome home,” she says.

“Thank you.” Tsubasa rests briefly against her, then nudges her backwards. “Now get out of my kitchen. Dinner’s nearly ready and it’s going to be good. You can save your inferior takeout for tomorrow. Go set the table for me.”

Maki nods, because she knows better than to argue with a decisive Tsubasa. She chides herself for her initial reaction as she lays out the chopsticks. She did want to spend more time with Tsubasa. She _missed_ her. And it’s nice to eat dinner together for once. They're usually both way too busy to even catch a glimpse of each other before bed. She can wait another day to find out whether that one patient survives in her medical drama. It’s not like it’s a big deal or anything.

When they finally sit down together and finish clinking glasses over the table, Maki feels herself relax. The delicate, flaky fish fillet ends up tasting better than her cheap takeout curry ever would. When she's not halfway across the country or stuck in a million meetings, Tsubasa is actually a superb chef - just another thing to add to her laundry list of talents. A certain ill-mannered makeup artist would probably be thrilled if she knew.

Maki stabs a cherry tomato with a little more force than necessary. Nico Yazawa is _not_ permitted to be in her head outside of working hours.

Right on cue, Tsubasa swallows the bite she's chewing and wipes delicately at a corner of her mouth. “So, how was that shoot I missed?”

Maki feels her whole body tense. The kindest answer she can offer is a dismissive grunt of dissatisfaction.

Tsubasa tilts her head to the side. “That bad?”

“What do you think? You left me alone with that demon again.”

“Who, Nico?” Tsubasa laughs. “But she's so nice! You’re not still pretending that you hate her, are you?”

“I'm _not_ pretending.” Even Maki's aware of how petulant she sounds. “And Yazawa’s _not_ nice. In fact, she's the furthest thing from it.”

Her girlfriend shakes her head. “I thought you’d moved past that by now. What do you have against her?”

“She's impossible to work with! She's always looking down on me like,” Maki makes her voice sound high and squeaky, _“Oh, a real model would never pose like that, Maki. Your posture’s all wrong, Maki. The great legend Tsubasa will never be satisfied if your face looks like that, Maki._ ”

“So... she’s offering you advice? I think she’s probably just trying to help.”

“It’s not advice! It’s like she’s laughing at me for not being good enough. It’s like-” Maki pauses, trying to think of the perfect example Nico being a nightmare, but it’s hard to narrow it down to just one when Maki’s offended by her entire existence. She shakes her head. “You just don’t see it. Because she’s all gross and smiley with you and Eli and with me she’s like - she’s just-”

Maki grabs a piece of fish aggressively between her chopsticks. She can’t even _begin_ to describe what Nico is like to someone who views her as a perfect angel. And from the way Tsubasa’s looking at her, Maki’s pretty sure that she’s still not convinced. She wishes Tsubasa would see what she sees. Wishes she could make her understand.

“Look, _anyone_ else would be better. And probably more experienced. She hasn’t even _done_ this before.”

“Oh, come on, Maki. Let’s try to be fair.” There’s amusement in Tsubasa’s expression. “You at least can’t deny that she makes you look good, right?”

Maki crosses her arms, but she doesn’t respond. As annoying as it is, she definitely can’t argue against that particular point. In the dressing room, Nico prattles on about frivolous topics, even though Maki has made it clear on multiple occasions that she’d much prefer silence. She constantly criticizes the quality of Maki’s skin and bombards her with invasive questions about Tsubasa. Yet despite how scattered and distracted she seems, Maki never once fails to be surprised when she looks into a mirror and sees her own face. Nico appears to have a natural eye for makeovers, and while Maki’s sure that anyone could do it with a little practice, she’ll begrudgingly admit that she’s emerged from the past few sessions more attractive than she’s ever looked in her life. The stills that Eli showed her, with the colors touched up and the features enhanced, looked so good that they almost made _Maki_ believe that she'd been modelling her whole life.

Spotting an opening, Tsubasa pounces. “There, see? Even if she’s a little cold to you-”

“ _Not_ cold. Rude. And obnoxious.”

Tsubasa arches her eyebrows but finishes her train of thought. “Even if she’s cold to you, don’t you think that might have something to do with your attitude?”

Maki pauses. “My attitude,” she repeats slowly. Under the table, her fists clench. She can feel it coming, that methodical, patient strategy Tsubasa employs when trying to win an argument. Because she knows so much better. Because she’s always rational and reasonable. Because she’s always _right._

And Maki just doesn’t want to hear it tonight.

“Yeah,” Tsubasa says. “You’re clearly out there giving off the impression that you hate her, which I really don’t understand because-”

“Maybe,” Maki interrupts sharply, “you’d understand if you were actually there. You know. Like you said you’d be.”

Tsubasa’s eyes widen in surprise. For a few beats, the only sound is the distant drip of the kitchen sink. Maki drops her gaze, smoothing out the creases in the napkin in her lap.

“I’m sorry things have been a little hectic lately,” Tsubasa pronounces at last. Her voice is calm and even. If she’s hurt by Maki’s outburst, she doesn’t let it show. “It’s a very busy time of year in the industry. I have a lot of meetings and I just need to be there for the company right now.”

“I _get_ that,” Maki insists. She’s heard it a million times. A year ago, she might’ve even been proud. “I just wish…” Her voice trails off. She’s not sure _what_ she wants.

They both look down at their plates. Maki picks at her food. She hates the tension, hates that they’re even talking about this in the first place. When she sneaks a glance over at Tsubasa, she looks deep in thought. She’s never been one to speak without first weighing all the pros and cons. It’s how, Maki reflects a little bitterly, she maintains her perfect reputation at all times.

Finally, Tsubasa clears her throat. It’s a small, uncomfortable sound.  

“You’re right. I’m sorry. I haven’t exactly been fair to you.” She hesitates, then puts her hand on the table palm up in a conciliatory gesture. She seems to relax when Maki reluctantly reaches out and takes it. She runs her thumb over the back of Maki’s hand as she continues, “But I am trying. This campaign is really important to me, you know. I want it to be a success. For us.”

“I know,” Maki says, her voice softer. “Why do you think I’m even doing this?”

Tsubasa squeezes her fingers gently. “And I appreciate that. A lot. I know it’s not exactly in your comfort zone.” She brightens suddenly and leans in closer, looking eager. “The next shoot is on Wednesday, right? I promise I’ll be there this time. No meetings.”

Maki wavers, seeing the sincerity in Tsubasa’s green eyes. After a long moment, she feels herself nodding. “Okay.”

Tsubasa flashes a relieved grin and lets go of Maki’s hand. She leans back in her chair and lifts her champagne flute. “Now, no more business talk at the dinner table. It’s so rare I get time to cook for you. Let’s just enjoy it.”

Maki raises her glass as well, and they clink them together lightly. The alcohol is dark and bitter on her tongue when she sips from it.

True to her word, Tsubasa changes the subject after that. The talk turns to discussion about their mutual friends, then the meal they’re eating, then the weather. Tsubasa politely inquires into Maki’s recent labwork. Maki does her best to be responsive, but there’s a persistent sense of futility that drags down every attempt at conversation, no matter how she tries to ignore it. She spends the rest of the meal searching for something to say.

When they’re finished eating and clearing the table, they relocate to the living room sofa. Tsubasa flips idly through the channels on the TV before settling on some cheesy romance movie. Even then she’s on her phone, answering emails and muttering over her schedule. She leans lightly against Maki’s shoulder and the warmth should be comforting, but it somehow only makes her feel more empty.

Not a word passes between them. They’ve lived together for over a year now. And they’ve been in a relationship for almost two. Their conversation should flow easily. But tonight, Maki feels so awkward. Like work and the whole campaign thing is consuming all her energy and she has nothing else left to offer.

As she stares blankly at the television screen, she wonders again what’s wrong with her. They’ve spent so many nice evenings together since they started living here. This is no different to their usual after dinner routine. Maki doesn’t know why she feels so _off._

Tsubasa yawns loudly and stretches when the movie ends and the credits begin to roll. Maki sees her sleepy face and despite her misgivings she feels a warm, familiar tug of fondness. She’s the only person who gets to see Tsubasa Kira, CEO of one of the most successful new businesses in Japan, at her most vulnerable.

Tsubasa catches Maki’s glance and smiles. She rests her chin against Maki’s shoulder once more. “Ready for bed?”

Instantly, the agitation returns. Maki stiffens a little and drags her fingers through her hair. She shakes her head. “I'm not really tired...”

“Nobody said you have to sleep.” There’s a suggestive sparkle in Tsubasa’s eye. She snakes an arm around Maki’s waist and whispers in her ear, “It’s been awhile, hasn’t it?”

Maki pulls away. She doesn’t mean to - her body just sort of reacts on its own, and before she knows it, she’s scooting further down the sofa, half out of her girlfriend’s grasp. She doesn’t miss the flash of hurt on Tsubasa’s face.

“S-Sorry,” she stutters. “I’ve got… cramps. PMS, maybe?” Her excuse rings hollow. “I think I'm going to stay down here for a bit.”

Tsubasa gives her a long, long look. Maki expects her to get angry, to lash out, anything. But after a few beats of stillness, she simply shrugs. “Suit yourself. Don’t stay up too late.”

She stands up deliberately, and Maki forces an unconvincing smile as Tsubasa plants a light kiss on her forehead. Maki watches as her girlfriend makes her way to the doorway. She’s only on the other side of the room, but somehow she feels much further away.

“Thanks again for dinner,” she calls after her, if only to lessen the sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Tsubasa turns and looks back over her shoulder.

“Sure. Well... goodnight then.”

“Yeah. Sleep well.”

It’d be so easy to follow her. So easy to join her and at least end the night on something positive. But Maki stays rooted to her seat. She hears Tsubasa’s footsteps on the stairs.

And just like that, Maki spends another night alone.

 


	3. Picking Up the Pieces

**i.**

Nico’s almost always the first to arrive on set, but that’s not for any strange reasons. She’s just a model employee, that's all. Sure, maybe sometimes she likes to sit in the fancy makeup chair and pretend _she's_ the lead model in the campaign, but that’s only because she’d definitely appreciate the opportunity way more than Maki would. It’s not like she’s causing any trouble.

She switches on the lights and grins to herself as she surveys the studio. It’s been two weeks already, but the sheer _novelty_ of it all still hasn’t worn off. She hopes it never will, even when she has a studio of her very own one day. Just think - her very own army of photographers, makeup artists, and beautiful models who are much less annoying than a certain redheaded amateur.

Nico steps towards the white screen, picturing the scene unfolding before her. Eli at the camera, swooning over Nico’s creative vision. An agreeable model dressed in stunning high fashion. A model who respects Nico, who listens when she gives directions. She points her finger the way Tsubasa always does and deepens her voice a little.

“Perfect! Face the camera a little more. There - hold that pose!” She can almost see her imaginary subject gazing seductively into the lenses, can almost hear the clicking of the shutter going off…

Wait. That’s not what a camera sounds like.

Nico practically jumps a foot in the air when she realizes that what she’s hearing is the ping of the elevator just outside the studio door. Without thinking, she ducks behind the large white photography screen, her heart racing. _Crap._ She’d hate to be caught doing something so embarrassing.

She hears the whir of the cardkey against the lock.

“...Don’t get it! What’s the point of me even being here? I might as well just go home!”

Nico freezes. She’d recognize that smooth voice anywhere. In fact, she has recurring nightmares about that haughty tone.

“Let’s not be dramatic.” _Of course_ Tsubasa’s here too. And she doesn't sound happy. It’s just Nico’s luck to get stuck (accidentally!) eavesdropping on some lovers’ quarrel. “The meeting doesn’t start until eleven-”

“You promised me! You promised you'd be here this time!”

“I am here, Maki! I’m here _right now_. Why is nothing I do ever good enough for you?”

Nico’s never heard Tsubasa raise her voice before. She knows she shouldn’t be here, but she doesn’t know how to sneak out without being seen either. The silence stretches out, long and uncomfortable. Nico tries not to move. She tries not to breathe.

“Why don’t you just go?” Maki's voice is flat and low.

“What? The meeting doesn’t start-”

“Just go! And next time I want to see you, I’ll contact your secretary and schedule in a meeting since that’s clearly the only thing you care about!”

“I don’t know why you always have to be like-”

The dressing room door slams hard, rattling in its frame, and Nico can’t help but flinch. She’s not entirely sure who’s stormed in there until she hears a long, weary sigh.

It’s the first time Tsubasa’s ever sounded anything but confident. The CEO mutters something under her breath, too quietly for Nico to catch, and her footsteps echo against the floor as she walks, presumably back towards the door. Nico lets out the breath she was holding and her shoulders sag in relief. She feels bad about sneaking around, but it's better than revealing she's been here the whole time. Fully ready to go about her business as usual after Tsubasa leaves, she takes a step back from her hiding spot.

This turns out to be a fatal mistake. The tripod behind her clatters to the floor.

“Is someone there?” Tsubasa's voice is stern and intimidating, with no trace of her earlier distress. Nico would be impressed, if she weren't so terrified.

Nervously, she steps out from behind the screen, her hands up in surrender as if she's about to get arrested. This is it. This is when she gets fired and all her dreams go up in smoke.

“S-Sorry,” she stammers. “I didn't mean to- I was just-”

For a heart-stopping second, Tsubasa’s expression is thunderous. She looks so angry and shocked that Nico braces herself reflexively. Slowly, though, recognition seems to dawn on her, and her grim countenance is replaced by a professional smile.

“Oh,” she says. “Nico. I didn’t realize you were here.”

“I wasn't listening in!” Nico says, hastily. “I mean, I guess I heard a few things but I was already here and there wasn't really a good time to say hi so I kind of just thought I'd better stay out of the way and I-”

“It's okay,” Tsubasa says, though her tone of voice suggests that she's not particularly pleased. She clears her throat softly. “I'm sorry you had to hear that.”

“No, it's-” Nico pauses. It's clearly not fine. Nico can _feel_ the tension radiating from Tsubasa. “Should I- Is there anything I can do?”

Tsubasa doesn’t miss a beat. “That’s so kind of you to ask, but there’s no need to worry.”

“But-”

“Really,” she interjects, and this time, there’s a subtle note of warning. “It’s quite alright.”

Nico wavers, but when she sees the way Tsubasa’s emerald eyes flash, she backs off. Of course Tsubasa Kira can handle it on her own. She doesn’t need the help.

“Okay.” Nico swallows and casts about for a convenient way to excuse herself from the conversation before she loses her job. “I should, um, get to work anyway so...”

Tsubasa nods and her posture seems to relax fractionally. “I should get going too. Thanks as always, Nico.” She pauses, as if trying to decide what to say, then flashes a chagrined smile. “Oh and… you might wanna give it a few minutes before you head in there.”

Nico hears a loud clatter from the dressing room, and they both wince. “R-Right. Will do.”

Tsubasa nods one last time and strides towards the exit. Nico watches her leave; her gait is as light and elegant as ever.

Nico turns around and dubiously eyes the studio behind her. She’d been so focused on all the commotion that she hadn’t even considered the prospect awaiting her behind the closed door of the dressing room. If Maki’s attitude was bad before, she’s _definitely_ not looking forward to seeing what the model’s like when she’s actually upset.

She’s all ready to heed Tsubasa’s advice and wait out the storm in the relative safety of the empty set. It’s the perfect time for her to catch up on her favorite gossip magazines anyway. But the whole plan is ruined when she peeks at the time on her phone and realizes that she was scheduled to start ten minutes ago. Eli and Kotori, the cute hairdresser who can tease out a perfect head of curls in record time, usually arrive much later than Nico, but it still won’t be long before they get here. She really doesn’t want to go in, but she has to have Maki ready for them. It’s her duty!

And despite her apprehension, there’s maybe a teeny part of her that feels a tiny bit sorry for Maki. Like, sure, maybe it’s been awhile since Nico’s been in a relationship, but if she’s honest, she kind of thinks Tsubasa _could_ have tried to follow her girlfriend and make up with her before leaving. Only kind of, though. What does she know? She’s not a dating guru. She’s just the makeup artist. A makeup artist with a job to do.

Nico takes a deep breath. She should probably just knock on the door. Maybe Maki will be too upset to even answer. And then… well, Nico’s not sure what will happen then. But for now, she’ll knock and she’ll see what happens. Nico moves across the room and stares at the dressing room looming before her. She’s totally going to go for it. She’s ready. Yep, any moment now.

Nico closes her eyes and envisions herself as a beautiful heroine on a daunting quest to slay a dragon or something. As a super smart princess who's totally on her way to save the world. As a strong, confident makeup artist who doesn't need to be afraid of someone who (let's be honest) she doesn't even like.

She raps her knuckles against the wood.

“Maki?” She says, as gently as she can manage. “It’s Nico. Your, uh... makeup person.”

Nico winces at how stupid that last part sounds. _Of course_ Maki knows who she is.

There’s no movement from the other side of the door. Nico listens intently, her whole body frozen in place. She’s not sure if Maki will even answer. She hates that she has no idea how to handle this. Beauty school didn’t train her up on dealing with this kind of thing!

Nico’s just about to give up and go back to playing with the cameras again when she hears it. A muffled sniffle, followed by the sound of footsteps approaching. There’s a scraping noise as the lock on the inside slides open.

“It’s open.”

Nico braces herself. She channels her inner superhero princess badass dragon-slaying warrior and turns the handle.

Maki’s sat back in the chair. Her shoulders are slumped, and when she turns her head, Nico feels something stir in her chest. Her big sister instinct kicks into full force. She sees the downhearted girl before her, and she looks so lost and so defenseless that Nico almost rushes across the room to comfort her.

Then Nico remembers who she's dealing with. She takes a tentative step closer _._ She’s used to Maki being a pain in the ass, but she doesn’t have any idea how to approach her when she looks so defeated. When she's clearly just stopped crying.

But Nico needs to figure it out soon if they’re going to be ready on time. Covering up those puffy eyes and blotchy cheeks is going to be a tough job, even with the perfect products and her world class skills. Nico’s never seen Maki look _worse_. And usually she'd be happy to point out that her skin looks like crap, but right now, she’s pretty sure that Maki’s too pathetic to fight back. Nico needs to take soft, soothing baby steps here. This one seems delicate.

“Hey,” Nico ventures. “Are you...”

She knows she should ask if Maki’s okay - if she needs anything or how she’s feeling - but it feels weirdly intrusive. They've never asked after each other's well being before. That’s just not how things work between them. And it’s not like Maki would believe that she cares anyway. When you've spent the last two weeks wanting to strangle someone, it's kind of hard to get across sincere concern. (Not that Nico _is_ sincerely concerned or anything. She just wants to do her job, okay?)

“You’re late, Yazawa,” Maki says, sharply. “Can you get to work already? And finish this as fast as you can?”

 _Typical_. Even at her lowest, Maki still finds time to be rude. Nico’s half-tempted to inform her that actually, she’s been here for more than half an hour, but she resists and springs into action instead. No one has to tell her twice to hurry up and get this whole awkward thing over with. She nods and uncaps her primer. She learned her lesson about getting Maki to do anything herself that first time, and ever since then she's just jumped right in, face touching and all.

But when she reaches out her hand, Maki breathes out the saddest sigh in the known universe, and it’s probably the most pitiful sound Nico's ever heard. She can't do this. She can't pretend everything's fine when Maki's stubbornly blinking back tears that threaten to undo her handiwork.

“Okay,” Nico says. “We're talking about it.”

Maki sits up straighter in her chair, feigning a look of confusion. “Talking about what?”

“ _You_. You're clearly upset. Come on. Tell Nico what's wrong.”

“I’m fine,” Maki says. Her body betrays her with another one of those shuddering aftershocks. The kind that only happen when you've been sobbing your heart out. Nico shoots her a look of disbelief and Maki's mouth twists, like she's painfully aware that no one’s ever going to believe her lie. “Okay, maybe it’s not the best day of my life, but it's none of your-”

“None of my business? Here's the thing, Maki. I have to do your makeup and there's no point in me wasting my time if you're just gonna cry it all off again, so it kind of _is_ my business.”

Maki sighs. “What do you want me to say? I'm pissed off. Do you want me to lie on the couch and tell you about my childhood?”

“I _am_ a good listener,” Nico says. She starts on Maki's makeup again, hoping it'll serve as a distraction. “To be honest, I couldn't care less about your childhood. But sometimes it helps to get this stuff off your chest, you know? And it's not like you care about my opinion anyway. I can't exactly see a lifelong friendship in our future once we're done with this campaign.”

“That’s right. We’re _not_ friends. So I don’t have to tell you anything.”

Maki settles back more firmly in her seat and crosses her arms, as if signaling a definitive end to the conversation.

“Suit yourself,” huffs Nico.

Oh well. At least she tried. If Maki’s too stubborn to accept her generous offer, it’s her loss. Nico’s fully occupied trying to cover up the puffiness of her eyes anyway.

She’s just finishing up with the concealer when she notices Maki chewing on her lower lip. She’s way more fidgety than usual today. She keeps shifting her legs and touching her hair and honestly, it's irritating. Nico almost says something when her fingers start drumming impatiently against the armrest, but she refrains from commenting on it as a special favor. She’ll leave Maki to stew silently, if that's what she wants. Nico’s used to doing her work without a single word exchanged between them anyway.

So it's a complete surprise when Maki suddenly breaks the silence.

“What do you… think of me and Tsubasa? Us dating, I mean.”

Nico nearly drops the brush she’s holding. This is new. She can’t remember if Maki’s ever spoken to her in a civil tone before. She can’t deny that it’s a welcome change though. She mulls over the question as she sets down the concealer and turns to find the blush, buying herself some careful contemplation time before she answers.

“You guys look great together! I can totally picture you on the front cover of a magazine as some hot, millionaire couple!” Maki's eyes narrow. Nico feels her cheeks get warmer. “Oh, I don’t mean hot as in _hot_ , I meant… um, it'd sell magazines, that's for sure! Yeah, I'm sure that most people would probably consider you to be a very attractive couple.”

Maki almost seems disappointed. “That's all?”

“Uh... no, I'm sure that you-” Nico pauses to think. It seems harsh to say she's sure they get along well, considering she just overheard them arguing. “I guess I don’t really know that much about you? So honestly, it’s kinda hard for me to understand _why_ Tsubasa's dating you.”

 _Crap_. She regrets her flippant words as they leave her mouth. She cringes, waiting for Maki to retaliate, or to close herself off completely.

But to her complete shock, Maki just kind of slumps over a little. “I don’t know why, either.”

Nico’s eyes widen. Her jaw drops open. Thankfully, Maki’s too busy examining the carpet to notice.

“Tsubasa’s great.” She says it quietly, uncertainly, as if trying to convince herself. “She works so hard, and she's so talented, and passionate… Anyone would be lucky to have her but…” She chuckles darkly. “I can't think of anyone but myself.”

She glances up and Nico gulps. Maki's never been this candid with her before. Actually, she's pretty sure this is the most the other girl has spoken to her since they've started working together.

“W-Well,” she starts, her mind racing for some sort of reassuring platitude. “I mean, it’s probably difficult for you too, right? Since she’s so busy all the time.”

Maki coils a strand of hair tightly around her finger. “Tsubasa’s always been so nice to me... She deserves someone who can support her. And I can’t even do that.”

Nico flounders for a moment. At a total loss for what to say, she turns around and begins blending the eyeshadow to give herself time to think. It's her job as a makeup artist to build people up - to make sure they leave feeling _way_ more confident than when they arrived - but Maki's not exactly a regular client. If she agrees that Tsubasa’s wonderful, Maki might get pissed off again. And disagreeing would be _sacrilege_. And while she could try pointing out all the good qualities that surely made Tsubasa fall for Maki in the first place, Nico's not sure she could think of anything other than how attractive she is, even if she tried.

But when she takes a close look at Maki again, she sees how dejected she is. How guilty and unsure. It’s hard to kick someone while they’re down like that, and Nico’s never been the type to ignore someone in need of help.

“I don't think that's true,” Nico says finally. She resumes putting makeup on Maki’s face, because she’s an efficient worker. Because it’s easier to slip into a calmer state of mind with a brush in hand. Customers talk about their problems all the time with her; she’s basically a therapist in her own right. This is nothing unusual for her - even if she’s counselling her boss’ girlfriend instead of a middle-aged mother searching for pity discounts. “At least you’re here, right?”

Maki’s pretty eyes narrow in confusion. “What do you mean?”

Nico gestures vaguely. “You know, the whole modelling thing. You’re putting time and effort into it, even though you’d clearly rather be somewhere else. Isn’t that, like, the very definition of being supportive?”

Maki’s brow furrows as she ponders the question, which doesn’t make it any easier to apply eyeliner. Luckily, Nico has a steady hand.

“Not really. She asked me to do it.”

“You could’ve said no, though? That has to count for something, right?”

“I…” Maki opens her mouth, frowns, then closes it. She shakes her head. “I couldn't. No way. Not when it’s so important to her.”

“Aha! So you admit it!” Nico poses triumphantly.

“Admit…  what?”

“You’re not even slightly into this, but you're still here trying to make her happy. Sounds like pretty good girlfriend behaviour to me.”

“I still feel like I'm ruining everything. I'm not _trying_ to be a pain, I just…” Nico’s hand is close enough that she feels Maki’s soft sigh as much as she hears it. “Forget it. You don't need to hear all this.”

Maki looks down at her lap and Nico tries not to let on how absolutely dumbstruck she is. Maki’s usually so self-assured, so pretentious and condescending. It's the first time Nico's ever considered that she might actually be _insecure._ That maybe outside of this whole modelling thing - when she's not stressed out and totally out of her comfort zone - Maki might occasionally be _nice_. Maybe deep, deep down Maki does have a good side. After all, Tsubasa doesn't seem like the type to fall for someone based on looks alone.

“Head up,” Nico says, and Maki complies without a fuss. There’s a sadness in her eyes that's painful to see. And despite every rude comment Maki's ever said, Nico wants to help her to feel better.

“I get it, you know,” she says sympathetically.

Maki narrows her eyes warily. “You do?”

“Yeah.” Nico brushes away a stray strand of hair from her face. “You wanna spend time with your girlfriend but you're stuck with me. I mean, obviously even being in the same room as the adorable Nico-Nii is actually a _gigantic_ privilege and-”

“Your point?” Maki cuts in flatly.

Nico straightens herself up. _Right_. She did have one. “I can totally see why you'd be upset.”

Maki gives her a doubting look, but she doesn’t immediately dismiss her. Nico takes it as a sign to continue.

“If I had a girlfriend like Tsubasa, I'd definitely wanna spend as much time with her as possible. And if she couldn’t make it, I’d be all like,” Nico pouts and clutches her eyebrow pencil to her chest, “‘don't you love Nico? Aren't I cute enough for you? Don't you-'”

“ _Stop_.”

Nico relaxes her dramatic pose and nods. “What I mean is, _anyone_ would feel the same way. You’re, like, majorly putting yourself out there and you want her to appreciate that, right? You want to know she cares too.”

Maki nods. “I _know_ she does. It's just hard sometimes. Tsubasa's just… so ambitious. She's always moving towards something. And I don't want to be the one that's dragging her down.”

“Why don't you tell her that?” Maki looks surprised, like she hadn't even _considered_ that as an option. “Tell her how you're feeling. I’m _sure_ she'll understand. And even if you guys end up fighting about it or whatever, it's still better than keeping it all locked up inside, right?”

Maki doesn’t answer right away. Her lips curl downwards, as if she’s trying hard to puzzle something out. Nico lets her think, taking her sweet time selecting the perfect shade of pink for her lips.

Finally, Maki speaks. “Yeah. I guess that makes sense...”

Nico holds back a smirk as she pivots and brandishes the small container of lip gloss she’s holding. “Of course it does. Relationships are _all_ about communication.”

“It sounds so simple when you say it.” Maki shakes her head and laughs, brief and bitter. “I must sound pretty stupid to you, huh?”

“Why do you care what I think?” Nico chirps. “I'm just an annoying, meddling makeup artist, right?”

Maki smiles and it takes Nico by surprise. It's probably the first glimmer of warmth Maki’s ever thrown her way. It’s a smile that, despite everything, Nico feels pleased to see. Sure, she often wants to hurl the nearest heavy object in Maki's direction, but that doesn't mean she wants to see her _cry_.

“You've got that right,” Maki says.

Nico _should_ feel offended, but weirdly, all she feels is relief. She likes it better this way, when Maki’s all self-assured and acerbic. The whole depressed, angst-filled thing doesn’t really suit her.

“Okay,” Nico pulls away for a better look, then nods in satisfaction. “My work here is done!”

They both look at Maki's face in the mirror. If she hadn't known already, Nico would never have guessed that Maki had been crying not even an hour earlier. Any trace of tears has been hidden away and covered up perfectly. It had been no small feat to tame those blotchy cheeks and swollen eyes, and Nico allows herself to feel some pride at her success.

“It's… good.”

Maki says it so quietly that Nico's sure she misheard. But she almost looks awe-struck as she touches her cheek tentatively and examines her reflection, like she's making sure it's really her image behind the glass. Nico’s not the big headed type, but she swears she gets better every time. She's getting so used to Maki’s face that it's almost second nature these days, knowing what shades will suit Maki and what brush strokes will flatter her face.

“I didn't even notice how fast you were working…”

Nico can't resist a dig at her. “It goes by faster when you're actually talking, you know. Instead of sitting there just glaring at me the whole time.”

Maki has the decency to look a little guilty, though she makes no move to reply. Nico’s tempted to rub it in further, but she decides not to push her luck. Maki could still get her fired any time she wants to.

“Anyway.” Nico begins putting the brushes and cosmetics away. “Kotori and Eli will probably be here soon. I should head out.”

Maki tilts her head to one side. “You’re not staying?”

“Nah. I have a shift at the mall.” She pauses and then smirks at the model. “What, are you gonna miss Nico-Nii’s company?”

Maki scowls immediately. “Hardly. I’m just glad you won’t be around to criticize me again.”

“It’s not my fault that Maki’s stiff as a board! If you just listened to me, maybe Eli wouldn’t have to spend so much time doing retakes.”

Maki crosses her arms defensively. “I'm trying! It's not my fault I don't spend every waking hour obsessing over this stuff like you do.”

“I'll give you some top tips next time! Since I'm so good at giving advice and all.”

“Great.” Maki rolls her eyes. “I can't wait.” And maybe it’s just Nico’s imagination, but her sarcastic tone doesn’t have quite the bite it usually has.

“Crap. I should get going.” Nico notices the time and quickly finishes clearing the dressing room table. She feels Maki’s eyes on her as she goes to grab her bag. She nods politely at Maki and reaches towards the door handle.

“Oh, and hey…”

Nico turns back. Maki’s still standing there next to the chair, and from this distance, Nico’s able to properly appreciate the affect the makeup has. Her eyes are captivating. Her face, framed by her pretty red hair, practically glows with a quiet elegance. But it's not like Nico’s paying any special attention to Maki’s face or anything. It’s just hard to tear her gaze away, for some reason.

Maki bites her lip, like she’s debating on whether to say something. Nico half-expects her to change her mind, to just clam up and close herself off again.

Instead, her expression clears and her eyes soften. She opens her mouth to speak, and when she does, her tone is shy but determined.

“Thank you. Nico.”

Nico’s heart flips in her chest. She’s not sure if it’s the genuine gratitude or Maki saying her name or some weird combination of both. But what she does know, is she’s completely unprepared for the way it makes her feel - warm and tingly and weird. _Super_ weird.

Maki's mouth is all soft and relaxed - some might even say she's _smiling._ And it’s such a rare sight that Nico doesn't really know what to do. When she finally locates a response from somewhere in her bewildered brain, her voice comes out higher than she expects.

“No problem! Well, uh... good luck!”

Nico leaves no time for any further conversation. She flashes a quick grin and rushes out through the door. It closes firmly behind her, but Nico still finds herself jamming at the elevator button with a fierce intensity. It’s really not that strange. Maki being civil just took her by surprise, that’s all. Nico’s reaction was totally natural. She’s basically forgotten about it already.

But she’s all the way outside the building before her heart stops pounding.

 

 

**ii.**

Impossibly, the photoshoots get easier.

Maki’s not entirely sure when she stops dreading the sessions, but at some point, she starts to accept that Tsubasa won't be there every time. She starts to listen to the advice she's been stubbornly brushing off for weeks, starts to appreciate that she's working with professionals who genuinely do know what they're talking about. The photographs improve greatly when she takes directions. When Maki looks at the screen at the end of the session, she can actually picture them in the campaign. Even Eli starts to smile more - she looks less severe with every passing session. Every time she gives a satisfied nod, Maki feels pleased that she has her approval.

And somehow - in an entirely unexpected development - the makeovers start to feel less like torture. Maki wouldn't stretch as far as to say it’s fun, but it's definitely tolerable. It’s not entirely terrible. After Nico went out of her way to make her feel better at an embarrassingly low point, Maki starts to answer a few of her constant questions, if only to make the time pass quicker. And strangely enough, Nico's actually somewhat easy to converse with. Sure, she's smug and she jumps erratically between topics and she often says things Maki completely disagrees with, but… she's good at keeping the conversation flowing. In fact, Maki would say that more often than not she's surprised when Nico says she's finished. Of course, that’s probably just due to her months of expertise gained from conning middle-aged women into buying cosmetics, and not any particularly special reason.

But it does help Maki relax a little. In some roundabout, indirect way, she even starts to enjoy herself. It’s a good break from her rewarding, yet taxing research work, and she gets to help out her girlfriend’s company. Plus, she muses as she gazes at the latest prints from their previous session, she can’t deny that she kind of _likes_ looking so good.

“These came out great,” Eli says, crossing one long leg over the other.

Maki leans forward to admire the shots of herself in a long smart coat, her high ponytail (extensions, courtesy of hair wizard Kotori) being blown about by the wind machine that Maki finally feels she's conquered.

“Yeah. Thanks to you, Eli.”

Nico clears her throat from somewhere behind Maki.

“Fine,” Maki says, faking a sigh. “Thanks to you too, Nico.”

She glances over her shoulder to smile, but Nico’s response is ungrateful. She narrows her eyes suspiciously and plants her hands firmly on her hips.  

“Okay, fess up. Who are you, and what have you done to Maki?”

Maki _wants_ to look offended, but she can't hold back her grin. “Don't be rude. I'm just trying to be nice.”

“No way.” Nico crosses her arms. “The _real_ Maki is never nice. Right, Eli?”

“I’m _always_ nice! Right, Eli?”

Eli looks back and forth between them, laughing warmly.

“Of course you're nice,” she says soothingly, and Maki flashes a triumphant smile in Nico’s direction. “But you _do_ seem a little bit happier than usual lately, especially today. Did something good happen?”

Eli's as observant as always, or maybe Maki just needs to work on her poker face. It isn't exactly a secret, but she doesn't usually make a habit of bragging about her work. Still, she can make an exception today. It's a special occasion, after all. So she takes a deep breath and decides to come clean.

“Yeah, actually. At work. My team and I have been waiting on funding for our project for _months_ and we were finally offered a research grant to get started.”

“Oh, that’s wonderful!” Heat rises to Maki’s cheeks as Eli beams at her. For as much modeling and posing she’s been doing lately, Maki’s still not quite used to being under the spotlight. And the sincere way in which Eli and Nico begin to congratulate her is decidedly unfamiliar.

“So? What are you researching?” Nico chirps. Maki knows she’s probably just asking out of politeness, but she really does sound genuinely interested. “Curing cancer?”

“No,” Maki absent-mindedly tugs at a stray strand of hair. “It’s a little complicated... It’s a biomedical study investigating the effects of enzyme blockers on Lewy bodies-” She winces as she notices the confused glance the other two exchange between them. She’s forgotten how it feels to explain her work to anyone besides Tsubasa. “We’re trying to slow the symptoms of dementia.”

“Oh! Wow.” Nico nods vigorously, but Maki's pretty sure she lost her at enzyme blockers. “That sounds super important and... sciencey.”

Maki stifles a snort of laughter. “Hopefully. It could be a real breakthrough if our findings are positive… Either way, it means I'll have a lot more work to do, which is good. Things have been a little slow at the lab lately so…”

“Perfect timing!” Eli chimes in. “Since we're basically done here anyway.”

“Done?” Maki turns her head sharply towards Eli. “Like… the whole thing?”

Something sinks in Maki's stomach. It’s not like she's disappointed or anything. But it kind of seems a shame that they're finished right she was finally getting the hang of things. When she was finally starting to relax a little...

Eli shakes her head. “I have enough material for the _print_ campaign. But we still have to shoot the commercial.”

“Of _course_!” Nico jumps in, like it's the most obvious thing in the world. “No campaign this size would be complete without one! Don't you listen to anything Tsubasa says?”

Maki crosses her arms defensively. “Of course I do.” She vaguely recalls her mentioning something like that before. But she wasn’t exactly paying attention at the time. “I- I was just asking about the _studio_ stuff...”

Nico looks unconvinced, but Eli steps between them before she can fire back some snarky response.

“This calls for a celebration,” she declares.

Maki blinks. “Oh. Uh, I already went out for lunch yesterday with my team at the lab...”

Nico makes loud, obnoxious snoring noises while Eli shakes her head.

“No I mean, let’s all celebrate. The three of us!” She checks her thin, classy wristwatch. “It’s almost 5, so how about an early dinner and some drinks? I know a great place a few blocks away.”

Nico hums noncommittally. “That does sounds fun, but I was going to meet a friend after this so...”

“Bring them along! The more the merrier!” Eli looks genuinely enthused by the idea now. “You don’t mind right, Maki? We can invite Tsubasa too-”

“She has a meeting,” Maki interjects quickly. She tries to sound indifferent, but her response comes out a little icy. She’d already asked her girlfriend to join her for dinner with the intention of telling her the good news earlier, but as usual, she’s tied up with work.

There’s an awkward pause, where both Nico and Eli are silent. The pity in Nico’s eyes puts a small dent in Maki's good mood, but Eli quickly recovers her initial enthusiasm. She smiles so brightly that Maki finds it hard to feel sorry for herself. Despite Eli's cool, unflappable appearance, she’s surprisingly excitable today.

“We can still have a fun night out,” she insists. “The company's really happy with our progress so far, so I'm pretty sure we've all earned a few drinks.”

“Sure,” Nico nods her head. “I'm in!”

Maki makes a soft sound of careful contemplation. She squeaks in surprise when Nico nudges her shoulder.

“Come on, Maki. We can't celebrate your success if you're not there.”

Maki tries to disguise her confusion. She's learned to accept Nico’s more irritating mannerisms lately, but that doesn't mean she's ready to jump at the chance hang out with her when it's not mandatory. And last time she checked, the feeling was mutual. So why is she being so insistent about this?

Still, Maki can’t help but entertain the idea. Her gaze drops to her hands, folded neatly in her lap, as she considers her options. She doesn’t have any plans for the night. Takeout for dinner three times in a row is pretty pathetic. And Eli seems so adorably fired up that Maki doesn't know how to say no. She has no reason to refuse.

And - if she’s being honest with herself - it does sound kind of fun.

Maki clears her throat. She lifts her chin and meets their expectant stares, turning her gaze towards Nico.

“Is your friend like you?”

“Not really?” Nico cocks her head, obviously baffled by the question. “Actually, we're opposites in a lot of ways-”

“I guess it's fine then,” Maki interrupts. She has to resist a smirk when Nico stiffens indignantly.

“Great,” Eli says, diffusing the mood with practiced ease. “Let's go!”

***

The diner, according to Eli, is only a ten-minute walk away. She walks a few steps ahead with Nico, discussing some fashion thing or another, while Maki trails behind. She breathes in deep, enjoying the fresh spring air. Their shadows, cast by the setting afternoon sun, stretch long ahead of them. It’s almost peaceful, in a way.

Eli half-turns her body so she can look back at Maki. “It’s just up ahead!” she calls out eagerly. A minute later, they’re standing outside an unassuming establishment on the corner of the street. Maki attempts to peer into the big, tinted windows but all she can make out is her own reflection. Her face, all smooth and striking from the photoshoot, startles her all over again. This is the first time she’s ever actually worn so much makeup out in public.

“Are you heading in? Or are you just gonna keep admiring yourself? You’re not _that_ hot, Maki.” A sardonic, high-pitched voice cuts through her reverie. She looks away quickly from the windows to glare at Nico.

“I don’t see _you_ going anywhere,” Maki hisses, an involuntary blush creeping up her neck.

Nico simply shrugs and points to her phone. “My friend’s on her way. I’m gonna wait for her out here. Why don’t you two go grab a table?”

“Good idea,” agrees Eli. “It gets pretty crowded during dinnertime. Let’s go, Maki!” She holds the door open gallantly and Maki crosses the threshold, if only to escape Nico’s teasing.

The diner is dark and atmospheric, smelling of rich fried food and filled with the low murmur of other customers seeking an early evening meal. It’s not the kind of high-end restaurant Tsubasa always takes her to, but it seems to have its own charm anyway.

One of the waiters spots them right away and bows courteously.

“Table for four,” Eli tells him. He beckons them to follow him with a cheerful wave, grabbing some menus along the way. Soon they’re seated across from each other in a slightly sticky booth towards the back.

Eli regards her kindly as the waiter brings them water. “Thanks for coming along, Maki.”

“I didn’t really have a choice,” Maki replies, but she smiles, so Eli knows she’s not serious. When she flips open her menu, her stomach growls loudly. She’s actually pretty pleased to be here, but maybe that’ll all change when Nico steps inside. “Thanks for inviting me. I know I haven’t exactly been the best company so far…”

Eli shakes her head. “Anyone would be nervous starting out.” If she has an opinion on Maki’s generally terrible mood in the earlier photoshoots, she’s kind enough not to share it. “And you seem so much more relaxed now. I'm glad.”

Maki shifts in her seat uncomfortably. “I still don’t really know what I’m doing...”

“But you look like you don't hate it now. Which makes it much easier to get good shots.”

“I-I never _hated_ it!” Eli’s polite smile tells her she’s not fooling anyone. Maki tugs at a strand of hair in agitation and decides she’d better give it up. “Anyway, I hope at least some of them are useable now.”

“Definitely. They look great.” Eli takes a sip of water, then frowns and sits up. “Excuse me a sec. I'm just going to go to the bathroom before Nico gets back.”

Maki nods, partially relieved, and waves her off. Eli is friendly, talkative, and most of all, professional - just like Tsubasa’s other friends. She’s definitely way more pleasant company than a certain irritating makeup artist, but if Maki’s being honest, interacting with superhumans like that for too long gets a bit exhausting. She has no problem with spending a quiet moment alone. As long as Eli gets back before Nico and her friend get here-

“There you are. Hey, where’s Eli?”

Maki lets out a resigned sigh. Of course. In a twist of terrible timing, Nico and her friend arrive moments after Eli has left the table, leaving Maki with the burden of explaining her absence _and_ making the initial small talk.

“She’s in the bathroom,” she grumbles as she turns her head to address Nico. She wastes no time in getting a good look at the woman Nico’s brought along - but not because she's curious about what kind of friends Nico has. She’s just always wary of new faces, that's all.

Nico’s friend, it turns out, is not very similar to Nico. For starters, she’s more than five feet tall. And her blouse and flowy skirt are much more age appropriate than anything Maki’s ever seen Nico wearing. And though Maki doesn’t often notice these things, it’s hard to ignore that certain features of her upper body are much more… _prominent._ She offers a kind smile as she takes a seat in the empty space next to Eli’s jacket. Nico hesitates for a second before sliding in beside Maki.

Nico’s friend smiles cheerfully. “So you must be the famous Maki Nishikino. Nicocchi’s told me so much about you.”

Maki frowns. “She _has?_ ”

“No,” Nico says, her cheeks turning pink, “I have not.”

Her friend's smile grows wider. “I’m so happy to hear your modelling’s improved lately. I heard you’re not even that stiff anymore.”

“I never said that!” Nico points an accusing finger. “She just knows all kinds of weird stuff. She’s, like, psychic or something. I definitely don’t talk about you!”

Nico’s friend hums. “But the other day you were saying-” Maki hears a soft scuffle and she’s pretty sure Nico kicks her friend under the table. She reacts far more gracefully than Maki would, and simply clears her throat. “It’s nice to meet you. I’m Nozomi Tojo. Call me Nozomi.”

“Nice to meet you too. I’m-” Maki glances at Nico. “Well. I guess you already know.”

Maki’s expecting a snappy response, but Nico shrinks down in her seat and hides her face behind a menu.

“It’s a pleasure,” Nozomi replies sweetly, flashing a set of neat, perfect teeth. She sips daintily at her water and looks around. “This is a nice little place. Thank you so much for letting me intrude.”

Maki dips her head. “I didn’t pick it,” she says, and she’s about to elaborate, but Nozomi's gaze wanders and it's suddenly quite clear that her attention is elsewhere.

Nozomi’s mouth drops open. Color rushes to her cheeks. Maki turns her head to see what’s caught her eye and she spots Eli a few booths away, completely still and staring back. She approaches the table, her blue eyes bright and wide, and Maki has no idea what’s happening. Eli moves towards them, almost in slow motion. She stops when she reaches their table.

“Is that… is it really you?” Eli’s voice is soft with awe. Maki’s never seen her _blush_ before.

“Well, well. It’s a small world, isn’t it?” Nozomi's blushing too, though she seems to have collected herself a little after whatever initial shock she had. A slow smile spreads across her face. She glances over at Nico, who looks just as confused as Maki feels. “This is the photographer you were talking about?”

“You two know each other?” Nico sputters, her eyes shifting between Nozomi and Eli, who’s still standing there dumbfounded and rooted to the spot.

“We may have crossed paths before,” Nozomi supplies in a lilting tone. She cocks her head playfully as she addresses Eli once more. “Are you going to run off before we can talk properly again?”

Eli blinks. “N-No, I-” Maki can hardly believe her ears. Cool, calm, collected Eli Ayase was… stuttering? She gestures helplessly towards the booth when her words fail her. “May I?”

Nozomi giggles and makes room for her. Eli doesn’t take her eyes off of the other woman as she slides in beside her. And just when Maki thinks things can’t get any weirder, Eli actually _takes her hand_ , like she’s some sort of English gentleman courting a fair maiden.

“I didn't think I'd ever see you again,” she murmurs. The upbeat pop song playing in the diner fades in Maki’s mind and she can almost hear fireworks and a romantic violin concerto.

”I always knew fate would lead you back to me,” Nozomi says dreamily, placing her other hand on top of Eli’s as well.

Maki turns towards Nico. She can’t be the only one that’s weirded out that this slightly shabby diner has suddenly transformed into the backdrop for one of those romance novels her grandma used to read. Instead of surprise or mild disgust, however, Nico’s brow is furrowed in thought, as if she’s slowly piecing something together.

A waiter materializes next to their table, and Maki strongly considers asking him if _he_ knows what’s going on because apparently she’s the only one out of the loop. Unfortunately he’s completely useless as a source of information and entirely oblivious to the mood. “Are you all ready to order?”

Nico holds up a hand to halt him. “Sorry, we’re gonna need a few more minutes.” Something seems to have cleared up for her, because now she’s grinning broadly at the couple across the table.

“Of course,” The waiter gives a polite bow. “If you'd like any drinks, please order them over at the bar.”

Maki picks up her menu again. Neither Nozomi or Eli make an effort to do that same. They just keep gazing deep into each others eyes like they’re the only two people in the room. It's so weird and mushy that it’s almost obscene.

“So, what’s your name?” Eli asks. “I know I didn’t catch it before.”

Maki almost knocks over her water. She stares in confused horror. They don't know each other's names? Even though they’re holding _hands_? Now Maki’s even more confused. She hasn’t even ordered yet, but she’s pretty sure this is the weirdest impromptu dinner of her entire life. Maki shoots a thoroughly questioning look in Nico's direction, but she's no help at all. She looks like she’s about to burst into laughter at any moment.

Nozomi smiles shyly. “I’m Nozomi.”

“Nozomi…” Eli breathes as if in prayer. “What a beautiful name.”

“And you’re Eli? Nico told me who she was working with but… to think it would be you…”

Maki’s about ready to throw her menu across the table at them, but she’s not sure they’d notice. She feels like an extra with no lines in some romantic comedy she can’t quite follow the plot of. She’s been nothing but respectful of whatever this is so far and tried her best to stay quiet, but her patience is wearing thin.

“What’s going on here?” she demands. “Is anyone going to fill me in?”

“Ah-” Eli blinks. She pulls back her hand, like she’s just remembered there are other people at the table. “I’m so sorry. This must seem a little strange-”

“You’ve got that right,” Maki mutters. Nico snorts in mirth beside her.

“It’s a bit of a long story...” Nozomi giggles. She exchanges an adoring glance with Eli. “Well, about a month ago-”

“Can you pause this beautiful gay moment for just one second?” Nico interrupts. She gestures at the waiter, who’s hovering disapprovingly nearby. “We should probably order something before we get kicked out. You guys drink anything, right?”

There’s a unanimous murmur of agreement that makes Maki bite back her comment about how much she hates cheap beer. This definitely doesn’t seem like the kind of place that would serve her signature drink, so she forces herself to nod too.

“Great,” Nico beams. She prods Maki’s shoulder with a pointed finger. “Come help me carry the drinks. And I swear, if you two haven’t decided what to eat by the time we get back-”

“We will,” Eli says. “I promise.”

Nico stands decisively and moves towards the bar, and Maki’s too baffled to do anything but trail closely behind her. She’s not too fond of being ordered around, but it seems like her safest option here. She’s pretty sure her head might explode if she’s left alone with those two for even a few seconds. When she dares to look back at them over her shoulder, they’re murmuring to each other, their faces close, their hands clasped.

“Maki, come on!” Nico pulls at her elbow as she shoves her way between two other customers. Maki mutters an apology under her breath while Nico waves to get the bartender’s attention. “Four highballs, please!”

Maki opens her mouth to protest, but the bartender is already turning away. Nico shakes her head and chuckles as they wait for him to fill their drinks.

“I still can’t believe it. This is soooo weird. Did you see Eli’s _face_? I thought she was gonna get down on one knee!”

“Yeah, what the hell was that? Do you anything about it?” Maki eyes her suspiciously, but Nico just gives her a cryptic smile.

“Nozomi told me a little when it happened but well... “ She nods her thanks as the bartender slides over four tall mugs and deftly dodges the question. “It’ll be more fun if they tell the story. Now help me with these drinks!”

***

“Eli,” Nozomi declares, brandishing some fries like a weapon, “was my knight in shining armor.”

Eli shakes her head, embarrassed. “I wouldn’t put it that way…”

“An enemy approached me.” Nozomi strikes a dramatic pose. Her hand only narrowly misses her half-empty glass of water. “And a beautiful, gallant woman rode in on a white horse with her sword drawn-”

Eli rests a hand on Nozomi's outstretched arm. “If you’re going to make things up then _I’ll_ tell them what happened. We were both in the same bar about a month ago-”

“Don’t you think my version’s a little more fun?”

“But mine’s more _accurate_ -”

“ _Hey_ ,” Maki interrupts them both. She doesn't often take interest in other people's personal lives, but this has dragged on long enough. “Can you just tell us what _actually_ happened already?”

Nozomi puts down the fries. “I might have been joking about the shining armor but...” She smiles at Eli and it’s almost sickeningly sweet, “she really did save me.”

“I just interrupted because a creepy guy kept hitting on her,” Eli translates. “It really wasn't as great as she makes it sound.”

“I couldn't find my friends. This guy wouldn't back off. And the prettiest girl in the room swept in and completely destroyed him.”

Eli laughs and shakes her head again. “I politely asked him to leave.”

“But she probably would’ve broke his nose if she had to,” Nozomi says.

Nico sits up straighter. “I can totally picture that! I definitely wouldn't mess with Eli.”

“So wait,” Maki clarifies. “You just happened to overhear this and jump in?”

“Actually…” Eli takes a sip of her highball. “I-I’d already noticed Nozomi a little earlier. It was kind of hard not to.”

Nozomi looks up, her emerald eyes shining. “I noticed you too.”

They promptly resume that whole sparkling romantic gaze thing again, and it makes Maki wonder how she and Tsubasa look to outsiders. Certainly not like _that,_ she's sure. She knows it’s natural for that initial spark to fade over time, but... have they _ever_ looked at each other like that? Maki bites her lip and considers it. Nico shakes her from her thoughts, making eye contact and pulling a grossed-out face that makes Maki snicker.

“So basically,” Nico says, “you two were checking each other out across the bar all night before that whole thing happened?”

Nozomi's cheeks are pink. “Sometimes… people just have a way of catching your eye.”

Nico quirks a skeptic brow. “Uh huh...” She looks over at Maki, then nods sagely. “I guess I could understand if it was someone like... Tsubasa for example. I bet it was love at first sight, right Maki?”

Maki frowns. She doesn't like the assumption. “Not really. We just met at a party my parents were throwing. We kind of spotted each other across the room and she came over to talk to me...”

Nico hmphs loudly and crosses her arms before Maki can say anything else on the subject.

“Why,” she asks grouchily, “does this never happen to me? Nico’s easily the cutest one at the table. Don’t I deserve a date too?”

Maki frowns. She's never considered the idea of Nico dating before, and she can't deny that she's a little curious, if only because she seems like such a handful. But it shouldn’t be hard for her to land a date. From a purely objective perspective, Nico’s not unattractive. Even if her personality is lacking, there must be _someone_ out there who'd willingly go out with her.

“Don’t worry, Nicocchi. I'm sure you'll find a nice girlfriend one day.”

There it is. Maki resists the urge to tense up. Nico's main hobby seems to be stalking female celebrities, so it’s definitely not a surprise. Still, the word _girlfriend_ sticks in her mind.

Nico plasters a smile on her face. “You know Nico can’t settle down because the whole world would be jealous!” Before Maki can scoff, she hastily changes the subject. “So anyway, back to the story! Eli saved you from the guy but you didn't even get her name?”

“We did talk a little but Eli had to leave.”

“I was there with work friends,” Eli explains. “But before we could exchange numbers I got dragged away-”

“Leaving me with nothing but a half-empty drink and hopes we would meet again,” finishes Nozomi fondly. The way they're leaning against each other so familiarly already makes them look like they've been dating for ages.

“I’m here now,” Eli asserts, taking her hand again. Nozomi gives her a tender look.

Nico mimes gagging. “Okay, I've had enough of this and my drink is empty.” She slides her glass across the table. “Your turn to get refills.”

Eli gets up good-naturedly and pulls Nozomi to her feet as well. “Same drinks?”

Maki clamps her mouth shut to resist complaining about the low alcohol content and cheap taste of what they ordered as Nico nods beside her.

“And don't take too long!” Nico calls after the two as they walk off hand in hand. They're too busy flirting with each other to notice. She sinks back into her seat in defeat and gives Maki a rueful shrug. “They're not coming back any time soon, huh?”

“Not a chance.” Maki shakes her head and leans back too. She knows that if she really wanted to she could take a bathroom break or check her messages or even fake a phone call to Tsubasa. But the weird thing is, she doesn’t want to. She feels strangely relaxed, sitting next to Nico.

“They definitely didn't waste any time, huh?” Nico laughs.

“I know. I’m _exhausted_. It probably took me and Tsubasa six months to get to where they got in fifteen minutes.”

Nico gasps. “You mean you weren't charmed by Tsubasa within three seconds of meeting her?”

“Oh, Tsubasa was charming... Uh. She _is_ charming.” Sometimes _too_ charming, Maki wants to add, but she bites her tongue.

Nico nods, her eyes shining with that unsettling fervor that appears whenever anyone mentions Tsubasa.

“She _totally_ is,” she agrees in a dreamy voice. Before Maki can say more, however, Nico frowns and looks guilty. “Shoot, I forgot. Are you two-” she searches for a way to phrase it, “alright now?”

Maki considers the question carefully before she nods. “We talked. Things are... better.”

And it's true. Things aren't perfect, but the atmosphere between her and Tsubasa has definitely improved lately. Simple though it was, Nico’s advice really helped her out.

“Really?” Nico's face lights up. “I’m so glad to hear that!”

Nico seems so genuinely enthusiastic that Maki can't hold back a reflexive smile. She doesn't get how Nico could be so happy for someone she really barely even knows, but it's nice. Maki’s so touched that the next words just kind of slip out before she can think about them.

“Thank you,” she says, softly.

Nico’s mouth falls open. “Huh?”

Maki’s cheeks get hotter. “I-If you didn’t hear then you missed your chance. I’m not going to say it again.”

Nico leans in closer, a smug smile on her shiny pink lips. “Are you thanking Nico for being a perfect angel? Or a super talented makeup artist? Or-”

“For being there when I needed someone,” Maki says, quickly. She only says it to stop Nico from getting carried away, but she flushes harder when she realizes the truth of it.

Nico’s clearly as dumbstruck as Maki is. All she says is, “ _oh._ ”

“It, uh. It helped.” Maki twists a strand of hair between her fingers. “Talking to you. It helped a lot, actually. So, um… Like I said. Thank you.”

She braces herself for Nico's usual boasting, but when she finally looks up again there’s no trace of self-satisfaction left in Nico’s expression. Her eyes are soft and warm. There’s no phone in her hand, no schedule in her lap. All her attention is focused on Maki, and it's kind of intimidating. It makes her want to sink into the ground and shrivel up from embarrassment.

“Anyone would do the same.” Nico shrugs. “It wasn’t exactly a big deal-”

“No they wouldn’t.” Maki grabs her napkin and begins playing with it nervously, if only to give her fingers something to do. “The way I acted when we first started… it wasn’t nice. And even though you were annoying and weirdly obsessed with my girlfriend, you - you didn’t deserve that. So you really _didn’t_ have to be nice to me...”

For a moment, Nico just stares. Then a sly smile creeps onto her face.

“I can’t believe it. Did Maki Nishikino just acknowledge that she acted like a huge jerk?”

“N-No!” Maki says. “I-I just-”

Nico beams. “I totally agree. You _were_ a huge jerk. But I'll accept these as an apology!” A small hand sneaks over to Maki's plate and swipes her last two fries.

“Hey!” She reaches out, but Nico pops them into her mouth before Maki can stop her.

“They’re cold.” Nico makes a face. “Too bad. I’m never gonna forgive you now.”

“Ah,” Maki blinks. She's so confused. Does Nico forgive her or doesn't she?

Nico laughs and nudges her shoulder. “Just kidding _._ Nico’s so kind hearted, that she’ll forgive you, even though you called her annoying during your heartfelt apology!”

“So we’re… uh-” Maki pauses, and Nico looks at her expectantly. She's closer than she was before. Maki can smell the sweet scent of her perfume. “You don’t totally hate me?”

Nico smiles and it's startlingly sincere. “I don’t wanna get mushy or anything, but… you’re not as terrible as I thought you were. I'm proud of you, Maki. For the science stuff. _And_ for winning Nico's award for the most improved model in the whole campaign!”

“The _only_ model,” Maki clarifies.

“Not the point,” Nico chirps. She leans back again and looks at Maki, her big eyes warm and bright. “It’s gonna be kinda weird, you know. Not seeing you all the time.”

“I know what you mean,” Maki says. “But we still have the commercial. That's more than enough time for us to get pissed off at each other.”

“Yeah.” Nico smiles. “So... I guess I'll see you when your girlfriend summons us again?”

“And hopefully not a minute before.” Maki smiles back.

It's weird, how a few weeks ago she would’ve been _horrified_ at the thought of spending a single second alone with Nico. But right now, it doesn't seem like the worst thing in the world. She's almost going to miss going to the studio on a bi-weekly basis. But of course, things are better this way. Maki has a lot of work to do. She can't afford any distractions from her research.

There's a soft moment where Maki wants to say something else. To apologize to Nico again - properly this time. To somehow prove that she's more than just a grumpy ass who's only here because her girlfriend forced her to be.

“Drinks!” Maki jumps as two dripping highballs are slammed into the table in front of them. When she looks up, Nozomi’s eyeing the both of them with an enigmatic smirk while Eli hovers behind her. “Oh. Did I interrupt something?”

“Nope!” Nico fakes a yawn and stretches. “I'm just waking up from a thousand year slumber. Since that's how long it takes to buy a drink, apparently.”

Nozomi tilts her head thoughtfully and slides Nico's glass away from her. “Sounds like _someone's_ being ungrateful.”

Nico scoffs and grabs the drink back forcefully. “And _someone_ took forever.” She prepares to take a swig but Eli holds up a hand to halt her.

“Wait!” Nico stops just in time and Eli nods, relieved. “This is the last time we'll all see each other for awhile. How about a toast?”

Nico rolls her eyes. “What are you, 40? Who _toasts_ anymore?” But she holds off when Nozomi cocks one eyebrow and makes a strange, groping motion with one hand.

Eli clears her throat. “To friends,” she says, and holds up her glass. The others echo her and raise their drinks as well.

Maki pauses. She scans the faces at the table. There's Nozomi, who she's just met today. Eli, who she's only ever associated Tsubasa's work with.

And then there's Nico. Nico, who's always been a huge annoyance, who was practically the worst person she's ever met in her entire life - right up to the moment she tried her best to comfort Maki when Tsubasa walked out on her again. Nico, who's grinning at her now with no trace of irony or insincerity in her bright eyes.

“Well, Maki?”

Maki hesitates. They all barely know each other. It's kind of a stretch to call them _friends_.

But she can't help but smile anyway. She lifts her glass and clinks it against everyone else's.

“To friends,” she repeats softly.

Somehow, the word feels just right.

 


	4. Impulse

**Chapter 4**

**i.**

The biggest downside to having all your dreams come true is that it makes reality seems so… _ordinary._ Working at the mall feels different now. Nico got used to strolling into the Kira Cosmetics head office like she belonged there. She loved being greeted by several perfectly made-up receptionists every morning. And she really appreciated being able to work in peace, without being interrupted by middle aged women desperately searching for discontinued mascara or unruly toddlers crashing into her legs.

It’s not that she dislikes the mall. No matter what happens, she’ll always be grateful she can work a job that brings people joy and pays her bills at the same time.

But it’s been almost two weeks since their last day at the studio and Tsubasa still hasn’t scheduled in the dates for the commercial. And though Nico knows she thoroughly impressed everyone with her outstanding talent during the campaign so far, there’s a tiny part of her that worries that she might have been forgotten.

Of course, she knows that's silly. She's Nico Yazawa - her rise to the top has been totally inevitable since the day she was born. She's way closer to her dreams than she was just a month ago. Tsubasa Kira even followed her back on multiple online platforms! Nico knows they'll call. And when the time comes, she'll be ready. But for now, she'll focus on her real job. She'll arrange these lipsticks in record time. She won’t even think about which colors would flatter a certain redheaded model and which ones would look hilariously terrible on her. She'll _focus_.

Nico’s totally zoning out when the phone rings. It’s twenty minutes before closing time, so the sound makes her tense up. Sure, she enjoys her job, but that doesn’t mean she _wants_ a long enquiry that’d keep her at work past the time she’s being paid to be here. She’s a dedicated worker though, so she drops the bronzers she was neatening up and hurries her way back towards the counter to help out whoever needs her assistance.

Nozomi gets there first. “Kira Cosmetics, Tojo speaking. How can I- _oh._ Hello. I wasn't expecting to hear from _you_. What-”

Nico watches as Nozomi’s expression passes through confusion and suspicion, landing eventually on a sly smile. Her eyes zone in on Nico. And that makes her feel kind of terrified.

“Of course,” Nozomi says. “I’ll just go get her.”

Nozomi holds the phone out and Nico points at herself, a questioning look on her face. She’s pretty popular with her customers, but it’s rare they ask for her personally over the phone. She mouths “who is it?” but Nozomi just smiles wider. She’s no help whatsoever.

Nico puts on her best customer service voice and reaches for the phone. “Hello, this is Nico Yazawa. How can I help you today?”

“Nico,” A raspy voice says. Nico almost drops the phone. She scrambles and catches it just in time and by some miracle it doesn’t crash to the floor. It’s been two weeks since she last heard that voice, but she’d recognize it anywhere. And the last place she’d ever expect to hear it is on the other end of her work’s phone line. “Nico? Are you… there?”

“Maki?” Nico squeaks. She’s momentarily speechless, but she also has a _lot_ of questions. If she wrote them all out on a piece of paper, it’d stretch out longer than the length of her entire body. She feels Nozomi’s eyes on her as she considers which one to ask first. “W-Where did you get this number?”

“From the website,” Maki says. “Obviously.”

Right. Sure. _Obviously_ that explains everything _._

“Did you, uh. Did you have a makeup enquiry?”

“Did I…” There's a long pause before Maki speaks again. Nico hears a flat bark of laughter. Something about it seems off. _Blurry_. “Sure. Why not.”

“Okay… well, obviously you’re in the hands of a total expert so ask away!”

Another long pause. Nico hears the clink of a glass and the low murmur of voices. Where is she even calling from?

“Yeah, I have a _makeup_ enquiry,” Maki finally says. This time, Nico knows she’s not imagining the slight slur in her words. “If your _makeup_ genius girlfriend stands you up _again_ for her stupid _makeup_ company, are you-” she stumbles, takes a deep breath, “are you legally allowed to break up with her?”

Nico’s heart gives an erratic lurch.

“Y-You don’t mean that,” she chuckles weakly, distinctly aware that she’s just been thrusted into a very private and personal matter. Normally, maybe, she’d be totally up for some drama, but delving into Maki’s and Tsubasa’s relationship just feels _wrong_ , so she tries her best to change the subject. “Um, are you okay? You sound…” _Drunk_ , she thinks. “Upset.”

“Well, I'm not,” Maki snaps without missing a beat. “I'm _fine_. With my wine. Oh, wait - that rhymes!” She giggles and a glass clinks again. No doubt about it. _Definitely_ drunk.

“Where _are_ you?”

Nozomi hums from somewhere nearby. Nico's got to admit, she's doing an excellent job of pretending to be engrossed in a stock list.

“At a restaurant. I told them I was waiting for someone, but she never showed up. Pretty embarrassing, huh?” Maki laughs, but she doesn't sound even slightly amused.

Nico’s mind races as she tries to put the pieces together. She really doesn't want to get caught up in the middle of all this. From a professional perspective, it's entirely inappropriate. The best course of action would be to wish Maki luck and hang up, then pretend the whole thing never happened.

But Nico’s always been too nice for her own good. She can’t just leave a pretty girl alone and hurting - even if that girl happens to be the grumpy girlfriend of her boss. Plus, if the tables were turned and Nico was the one all drunk and melancholy, she'd totally appreciate a shoulder to cry on. And it sounds like right now, Maki could really use a friend.

Against all her better instincts, Nico takes a breath. “Do you… want some company?”

“No,” Maki grumbles. “I think Rin and Hanayo are busy tonight so-”

“I meant _me_ ,” Nico clarifies. “The talented superstar, giver of great advice, total angel Nico-Nii.”

“ _Oh._ ” Maki sounds taken aback. “That's not why I called or anything. There's no need to-” There’s a rustling noise. Nico can totally picture Maki running her fingers through her hair. “No, I-I’m probably gonna leave soon. I... think I'm kinda drunk?”

“Really?” Nico gasps in mock surprise. “I couldn't tell at all.”

“Drinking is nice,” Maki says, and her voice is all defensive. “It never stands me up.”

Nico chuckles. “I might not be Tsubasa, but I could totally come over there. I'll probably catch you up pretty quickly. I’m kind of a lightweight anyway, so... What’s the address?”

“Honestly, I’m _fine_. I don't want to drag you into all this again. I just…” Maki sighs, soft and dejected. “I just… didn't know who else to call.”

A pang of sympathy shoots through her chest. Nico cups the phone closer. “Where are you, Maki?” she asks, as gently as she can.

A breath, two breaths. Nico knows that Maki’s too stubborn to accept the help and honestly, it’s none of her business anyway, but for some reason she clenches the handset with all the strength she can muster and _wills_ for a positive answer from the other end of the line.

“Ginza.” Just when Nico’s about to prod her again, Maki whispers a single word so quietly that Nico almost doesn’t catch it.

“What?”

“It’s in Ginza.” She speaks faster now, with more conviction. “Let me look up the actual address. Do you know the Chanel building?”

Nico gulps. That’s an expensive part of Tokyo that she hardly ever sets foot in. Still, she jots down the address when Maki reads it off for her and glances at the clock.

“I’ll be there in about half an hour. Just wait for me, okay?”

“I'll be here,” Maki says. “Thanks, Nico.”

The line goes dead. It takes Nico a long moment to actually put down the receiver. A tiny part of her wonders if Tsubasa would disapprove of her meddling, but surely she wouldn't want her girlfriend to be all alone and upset... right?

Nozomi pops out from behind a shelf, making her jump. “Going somewhere?”

“God, could you make some noise next time?” Nico complains, but then she shakes her head. Priorities. “Look, I need to leave a little early. It’s an… emergency.”

Nozomi eyes her thoughtfully. Nico fully expects some prying questions, but after a cryptic quirk of her mouth, Nozomi only nods.

“Sure. We close in fifteen anyway. I’ll cover for you.”

Nico resists the urge to squeal with delight. There’s a lot you get away with when your best friend is also your manager.

“Thanks a ton. I owe you one!” She pauses for a quick hug before dashing off to the locker room to get changed.

Nico twirls in front of the mirror before she leaves, examining her reflection carefully to make sure she looks her best. She'd just thrown on a cute striped shirt and some short overalls on her way to work, and while _of course_ she looks adorable, she doesn't want any snobby types looking down on her. But her only other option is her mildly foundation stained uniform, so she doesn't exactly have a choice.

She checks the mirror once more. It’s just Maki. It really isn’t a big deal.

But as she rushes out of the room, her heart pounds with an odd mix of excitement and anticipation anyway.

***

It takes a lot to intimidate Nico, but she can't deny she feels a tiny bit out of place as she makes her way towards the elevator inside the Chanel building. But her Mama always taught her that confidence is everything, so she holds her head up high, smiling gracefully at the shop assistants as she passes them. If she moves fast enough then no one will spot that her designer handbag is a knock off. She's totally living out her rich girl fantasies right now.

When she steps out of the Chanel branded elevator into the restaurant lobby, she's hit with the scent of fresh food. This place is so upscale it even _smells_ fancy. She glances around, but it's too big to find Maki from the entranceway. She _does_ spot some _amazing_ looking desserts and a bunch of super well dressed people, which makes Nico feel a little out of place. She totally would've dressed for the occasion if Maki had give her some advanced warning! She swallows her insecurities and scans the menu on the wall, almost choking when she sees the prices. 20,000 yen for a standard dinner set? Are you _kidding?_

“Can I help you?” Nico jumps as a waitress in a waistcoat and a crisp white shirt appears behind her. There’s something instantly off-putting about the way she greets Nico. She totally _reeks_ of snooty. Nico takes a breath and draws herself up so she has perfect posture. _Rich girl vibes,_ she thinks. She can totally pull this off.

“Yeah, hi, I'm looking for my-” Nico hesitates, “my _friend_. Maki Nishikino.” The waitress stares back at her blankly. “She's young, red haired, pretty...”

“If you’ve lost someone, try customer services. They’ll make announcement on your behalf.”

“No, she's _here_ ,” Nico gestures to the restaurant. “She's been waiting for a while. I think she's been, uh. Sampling your wine list?”

“Ah.” Recognition flashes over the waitress’ face. Her sharp gaze shifts from Nico's face to her exposed legs and her cute sandals. “Right. Well. Follow me please,” Nico nods and trails after the woman, equal parts amazed by how good the food around her looks and grossed out by how much it costs. “You’re late, you know. We've been keeping your dinner warm for quite some time.”

“Oh, no, I wasn't-” Nico shakes her head. It's not even worth trying to explain. She plasters a smile onto her face. “My sincerest apologies,” she says in her fakest, fanciest voice. “I'll certainly try to do better next time.”

The waitress smiles back. Nico gives her props for trying, but her expression is equally false. She gestures to a table in the corner of the room, by a large open window. “Is that your _friend?_ ”

People are chatting all around her, but Nico’s eyes are drawn immediately to the only table with one occupant, to the back of Maki’s pretty red hair.

“That's her,” Nico dips her head politely. “Thanks.”

“We’ll bring your first course out shortly,” the waitress says, zipping off with her nose in the air before Nico can say anything else.

Nico takes a breath. She's way out of her depth here. But when she watches Maki’s shoulders slump forward, she knows what she has to do.

She moves closer.

“Mind if I join you?”

Maki looks up in surprise and Nico’s heart lurches. The first thing she notices is that Maki looks _beautiful._ Which isn’t really out of the norm - she’s seen enough of Maki all dolled up for photoshoots. But this time, it feels different. More _personal_. Maki’s hair is carefully curled and tied into a low ponytail. Her ice blue dress hangs gracefully off her shoulders, a form-flattering, fancy little number that ends halfway down her calves. Nico’s eyes are drawn from the small, tasteful earrings that twinkle when she turns her head to the thin, silver necklace hanging delicately around the nape of her neck. Her gaze trails down to the pretty pendant that sits just above the curve of Maki's chest. She promptly flushes and glances away quickly.

“You actually came,” Maki says in disbelief.

“Of _course._ ” Nico settles down gingerly into the plush chair. The table laid out in front of her has more cutlery than she's ever seen in her life. “I said I’d be here, didn't I?”

Maki’s expression darkens. “Well it’s not the first time I've heard that today, so…”

Nico winces. Right. That’s why she’s here. She looks again at Maki’s gorgeous outfit, how it perfectly complements her pretty features and makes her look right at home in possibly the most expensive restaurant in all of Ginza. Nico vaguely remembers hearing about this place, and she’s aware that getting a table here isn’t easy. That just makes everything feel even more like a waste. Maki’s all dressed up for someone who never came.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Nico ventures. She doesn’t quite know how to bring up the elephant in the room - Tsubasa’s deeply felt absence.

Maki averts her gaze and doesn’t answer. Instead she reaches for an empty wine glass and fills it with way more dexterity than Nico would have expected, given her obvious intoxication. She slides it across the table. “Try this. It's so good.”

Nico glances at Maki’s pink cheeks, then carefully moves the half-empty bottle of wine out of the range of her hands. “I can tell you've been enjoying it.”

“I didn't invite you here to judge me.” It's the first time Nico's ever seen Maki pout like a child. She has to admit, it looks kind of cute on her.

Before Nico can press any further, the voice of a waiter interrupts them.

“Some seared scallops to start you off,” he declares as he expertly places the dishes on the white tablecloth. The smell is so good that Nico’s stomach growls, and she bites her lip. Maybe if she doesn’t actually eat any of it, she won’t have to foot the bill.

Her hesitation doesn’t escape Maki’s attention. “Just eat,” she says as she unfolds the dinner napkin and spreads it neatly across her lap. “It’s fine.”

Nico swallows. “I’m not hungry,” she lies. Actually, she hasn’t eaten anything since noon. On a normal day, she’d be just settling in now with a nice, home-cooked meal and tuning into her favorite primetime celebrity gossip show.

“You’re practically drooling, Nico. Look,” she adds, when Nico still doesn’t pick up one of the many forks laid out in front of her, “Tsubasa already paid for a meal for two. And she’s not coming. So you might as well have it.”

Nico wavers as she considers the pros and cons, but in the end she loses to the steaming scallops right under her nose. She’s only human after all, and when else is she going to get a chance to eat something so expensive?

She nods, more to reassure herself rather than Maki. She flattens her own napkin in her lap, observing Maki closely to see which of the millions of forks she reaches for. When she grabs a small spoon, Nico mimics her and takes a bite. The shellfish meat is cooked to perfection and practically melts in her mouth.

“Holy _crap_ ,” she exclaims, loud enough to earn a curious glance from the couple on the next table. “This is… This is amazing!”

Maki just shrugs back at her like it's the most obvious thing in the world. “Try the wine,” she says, between delicate bites. “Trust me.”

Resolve weakened, Nico gives in and reaches for her glass, and Maki’s not wrong about how nice it is. It’s fruity and sweet and even though she's not sure it tastes _that_ much different from a cheap bottle from the convenience store, it definitely complements the food perfectly. Maki smiles when Nico nods in approval and it _almos_ t feels like a nice, normal dinner between friends.

“Do you and Tsubasa _always_ eat like this?” Nico asks in amazement.

The smile on Maki’s face promptly disappears. “I don’t know. I guess so. Tsubasa likes to go all out.” She glares broodingly at her plate. “When she’s around, at least.”

Nico feels guilty at how quickly Maki tenses up. It reminds her that she can’t get too comfortable. It’s a beautiful restaurant, but she didn’t come here for a free dinner. She came here to _help._ Nico spends a few extra seconds chewing on some perfectly seasoned scallops before wiping carefully at her mouth and clearing her throat.

“What happened?” she asks tentatively. “Did she have to work again?”

Maki’s lips set into a thin, hard line. “Yeah,” she says. “Kind of.”

“Oh?” It’s proof of how they’re better acquainted these days, the way Nico _knows_ to be gentle rather than pushy. While Maki sits there quietly considering what information to share, Nico takes the opportunity to observe the other customers. She’s rated at least twenty people on their expensive fashion choices and sipped her wine multiple times before Maki finally speaks.

“She’s in Okinawa. Scouting out locations for the commercial.”

“Oh my god.” Nico sits up straighter in her seat, a rush of excitement bubbling in her chest. “We’re shooting the commercial in Okinawa?”

She stops short as Maki’s frown deepens. Nico shakes her head. There’ll be time to brag to all her followers about this later.

“Uh, I mean… Come on, Maki. Aren’t you gonna tell me why I’m here?”

“ _You’re_ the one that insisted on coming,” Maki mutters. She sighs and traces her finger moodily down the side of her wine glass. Knowing the signs, Nico bides her time, chewing deliberately on an artichoke and simply enjoying the flavors.

It’s not long before Maki opens her mouth again.

“We had this planned out for weeks,” she starts.

Nico leans in a little closer to hear her. The candle in the middle of the table casts a flickering glow over Maki’s features as she slowly opens up.

“We were supposed to have dinner, then go to the opera. They're great seats. We’ve had the tickets booked _forever._ But I guess going to Okinawa was more important...”

Maki reaches for her wine again and Nico cringes.

“That doesn’t really sound like Tsubasa,” she says quickly, before Maki can down the glass. “N-Not that I know her well or anything.”

Maki sets down the drink and takes a deep breath. “She was supposed to get back earlier today, with plenty of time for dinner. Her flight got cancelled, that’s all. There’s some stupid storm, and she won’t be able to leave the islands until it clears.”

“Oh.” Nico cocks her head, a little bemused. “Then… it’s not her fault, right?”

“I _know_ it’s not her fault,” Maki snaps. Her fingers drag across her scalp, messing up her elegant hairstyle. “I know it’s not her fault but it’s just like, did she have to pick _this_ weekend?”

“I’m sure she’s sad about it too,” Nico insists, earnestly. “I bet she’s sitting in the airport just as bummed out as you are-”

“It just happens _all the time,_ ” Maki interrupts. Then she makes a face. “I’m just tired of it, you know? I was really hoping today would be-” She stops herself and shakes her head. “ _Ugh_. I probably sound so selfish right now.”

“No!” Nico hastens to say, although privately she thinks that Maki is _maybe_ blowing things out of proportion a tiny bit. She tries her best to look at it from Maki’s perspective as she thinks about what to say. “There’s nothing wrong with being a little selfish anyway.”

Maki blinks at her. “What do you mean?”

“You know!” Nico gestures with her spoon. “Like… relationships are supposed to be about giving _and_ taking. It’s not a crime if you want Tsubasa to put you ahead of her work sometimes. That just proves you really love her, right?”

Nico tries not to read too much into the way Maki flinches. She opens her mouth and hesitates. After a long pause, she finally nods. “Yeah. Sure. I love Tsubasa.”

Nico claps her hands together. “Well, there you go! I’m _sure_ it kills her too that she’s missing your boring opera-”

“Not boring,” Maki mutters.

“Fine. Whatever. Your _fascinating_ opera. Either way, there’s nothing you can do now. But you can talk to her when she gets back. Book tickets for an even more boring opera. Tonight might not have worked out, but that doesn’t mean it’s the end of the world or anything! You can listen to old people music any time.”

The corner of Maki’s mouth twitches a little. “Maybe someone should get you a ticket. Since you’re clearly so uncultured.”

“No offense, but I’d rather do like, literally anything else.” 

“Your loss,” Maki says, but there’s no reproach in her tone. She regards Nico across the table, her eyes contemplative, and it makes Nico feel just a tiny bit self-conscious.

She’s about to ask if she’s got something on her face when Maki speaks again, her voice soft.

“Thanks. I think I needed to hear that.” Her teeth catch at her bottom lip. Then, even more quietly, she adds, “You always know what to say.”

She smiles and Nico’s heart flips several times in succession. Something about the candlelight and the classical music and how ridiculously pretty Maki looks tonight makes Nico feel _weird._

“A-Anyway,” Nico stammers, “let’s enjoy this. It’s not every day you get to have Nico as a date! I think that’s our food now!”

Right on cue, two waiters appear - smoothly removing their empty plates and replacing them with another course of food in record time.

Maki nods, and for the first time all night, she doesn’t look totally unhappy. “Sure,” she says. “Let’s eat.”

***

Dinner turns out to be perfect. Nico’s pretty sure she’s never eaten a better meal in her life. Sure, the portions are small, but there are so many perfectly flavored dishes that it’s not long before she’s completely stuffed. Maki, too, loosens up a lot - especially when they start on their second bottle of wine.

By the time they’re finished with their beautiful Chanel-branded dessert platter (which Nico snaps several pictures of to Tweet about later), Maki’s the most relaxed Nico’s ever seen her. If Nico didn't know better, she’d never guess that she was on the verge of tears a mere hour ago.  
  
“That’s gotta be it, right?” Nico groans, collapsing back against her chair. “Nico’s not gonna make it. Please tell me there’s no more.”

“We’ve had...” Maki pauses to count on her fingers, her flushed face screwed up in concentration, “five courses. Yeah. Five. That’s all of them.”

“Thank _god_ ,” Nico sighs in relief. “I couldn’t eat another bite.”

A waiter passes by and spots their empty plates. “How are you finding your dinner? May I take these?”

Nico beams up at him. “Yes, please! And oh my god, the food was _so_ good!”

“I’m so pleased to hear it. Please stay seated for a few more moments.” The waiter winks theatrically at Nico before he whisks their plates away and leaves.

Nico frowns in confusion. She’s puzzling over whether he was hitting on her or not when she turns and finds the snooty waitress from earlier lurking by their table with _another_ plate in her hands. Baffled, she can only watch as the waitress places a small, elegant cake, topped with a single candle, directly in front of Maki.

“Happy birthday from all of us here.”

Nico’s jaw drops. She almost gasps out loud. “Hold up, wait a sec. It’s your _birthday?”_

Now the snooty waitress really _is_ looking at her like she’s stupid. “Didn’t you request this, madam? It was ordered alongside your pre-payment.”

“Sure. Right.” Nico fakes a laugh. “Gosh, I’m so forgetful. T-Thank you.”

Nico nods quickly, hoping the waitress will take the hint and leave. She does, but not before she gives Nico a long, probing glare.

“What the hell, Maki?” Nico hisses, the second she’s out of earshot. “What the _hell?_ You didn’t tell me it’s your freaking _birthday?”_

“It’s not a big deal.” Maki shrinks down into her seat. “P-Please don’t make a scene.”  
  
Nico quaffs the rest of her wine and takes a deep breath before projecting her harmonious singing voice. “ _Happy birthday to_ -”

“ _Shhhhhh,”_ Maki flushes and lurches forward. She blows out her candle quickly, before Nico can sing anything else. “See? All done. No need to make a fuss.”

“Now’s not the time to be shy, Maki! It’s a special day! It’s your- oh.” Nico deflates as realization dawns on her suddenly. “That’s why you were so upset that Tsubasa’s not here…”

Nico’s stomach sinks. It all makes sense now. That’s why Maki wanted today to be different. That’s why she didn’t want to be alone. She wanted to spend an evening with her girlfriend, but she ended up so lonely and desperate that she had to call someone she barely knows to keep her company. Nico really does feel sorry for her, but she also knows dwelling on that won’t help anything. She only has a few hours left, and it's now her mission in life to make sure that Maki has a really great birthday.

“It’s like you said,” Maki twirls the ends of her hair between her fingers, “there’ll always be another time...”

“No,” Nico says, firmly. “You were right. She didn’t have to go _this_ weekend. You wanted to go to the opera on your birthday. You...” She sits up straighter, as a great idea flings itself to the surface of her slightly cloudy mind. “Oh my god. Let’s go to the opera.”

“What?” Maki furrows her brow as she tries to make sense of what Nico is saying. “We can’t? I mean, it’s already started-”

“Who gives a crap about that? You guys reserved seats already, right? We can still walk in and catch _some_ of it, at least. Don’t these things last for a hundred years anyway?”

“You don’t want to go to the opera. What did you say before? You’d _literally rather do anything else?_ ”

“Yeah, but _you_ want to.” Nico slaps the table for emphasis and earns a dirty glare from the couple seated near them. “It’s your birthday, and if you wanna listen to stuffy old music then you deserve to! Besides, the seats are probably comfy, right? Worse case scenario I’ll have a nap or something.”

Maki screws up her face, scandalized. “You can’t just _nap_ at the _opera_ ,” she complains, but there’s an undeniable trace of intrigue in the way she leans in.

“Come on, Maki. Where is it?” Nico prods excitedly.

She sighs in resignation. “It’s just 2 blocks away.” She checks her watch. “We could probably make it in time for intermission if we leave now…”

“Great!” Nico leaps out of her seat. “Let’s do this!” She gestures for Maki to join her, but she still looks hesitant.

“Will they even let us in? I’m kinda drunk and you’re-” She takes in Nico’s bare legs and her short overalls like she’s just noticing them for the first time. “A little... casual?”

Nico huffs. “Well, I didn’t know I was going to need a dress when I woke up this morning. Plus,” she gestures towards Maki’s gown, “you’re fancy enough for the both of us! Let’s go!”

She stretches out her hand and Maki takes it, climbing to her feet with a mildly clumsy wobble. Nico links their arms together, because high heels and two empty wine bottles aren't usually a winning combo. Because she's careful and considerate and keeping Maki upright is a priority. If Nico's heart flutters, it's only because Maki’s warm and tall and she smells nice and being close to _anyone_ feels good when you're a tiny bit tipsy.

Nico catches sight of their reflection in the darkened window and she bursts into laughter. Maki looks around for the source of her amusement and sighs when she sees what an odd pair they make.

“We are so getting kicked out,” she mutters as they make their way to the exit. But Nico’s not fooled.

She knows a smile when she sees one.

***

In an amazing turn of luck, they don’t get turned away at the door, though Nico is forced to endure a judgemental once-over from the usher. They make it to the seats in the VIP section just before intermission ends. Right away, Nico can tell she’s way out of her league. For starters, the whole opera is in German, and when she tries to complain about it, Maki has the nerve to tell her that “you don’t need to understand the language to appreciate the music.”

Despite the obvious linguistic barrier, Maki seems super into it, so Nico does her best to just leave her alone. She closes her eyes and she tries to doze off, but the singers’ voices are so loud and jarring and okay, _maybe_ she’s a little drunk which makes it extra hard to sit still. Nico starts with super good intentions, but she ends up bothering Maki the whole time anyway, whispering questions about the plot and keeping up a running commentary, undeterred by the not-so-subtle annoyance of the surrounding audience members.

And here’s the thing: Maki doesn’t seem to mind. Oh sure, she shushes Nico every so often and one time even claps a hand over her mouth to keep her from getting too loud, but she’s not _angry_. In fact, she seems to take pride in sharing her ostentatious knowledge. Nico's not usually a fan of snobby smart know-it-alls, but there's something sweet about how hard Maki concentrates on filling her in on the ridiculous plot. There’s something cute about the way she laughs hard enough to earn them both a particularly passive aggressive glare from an old lady sitting behind them when Nico does some high quality lip-syncing to a song by a man with a deep, booming voice.

In a plot twist that no one would ever see coming, Nico has fun at the opera. She has a _great_ time with Maki. And it might be presumptuous, but she's pretty sure Maki has a good time too. Nico feels weirdly proud of being able to turn this entire evening around for her. She really _can_ make anyone smile. Someone should give her a medal or something.

When they stumble out into the warm, spring night, they’re both breathless with badly restrained laughter. Nico can totally hear some mutters of disapproval around them but she can’t bring herself to care. She’s too busy making sure Maki doesn’t fall over, though if she’s being honest, she’s pretty giddy and unsteady herself.

“I can't believe,” Maki says between breaths, “that you tried to dance along to an _opera_.”

“Well, someone needs to liven it up!” Nico declares. “Are you honestly still pretending it's not boring?”

“ _Boring?_ ” Maki’s so offended that she off-balances again, and Nico has to tighten her grip. “You were enjoying it more than anyone.”

“I was trying to be supportive. Since it's your 900th birthday and all-”

“ _Plenty_ of young people enjoy the opera,” Maki gestures around, but the majority of the nearby crowd are _at least_ twenty years older than them. It takes her a moment to realize, but when she does she pouts. “M-Maybe not _here_ but the sample size isn't - um. Crap. What’s the word?”

Nico giggles. “Let's get you to a taxi, genius.”

She steers them out of the crowd and down a quieter side street - pretty impressive, considering the inebriation _and_ their current height difference is working against them. Their footsteps are loud and uneven, and the way they're zigzagging across the pavement is enough to make Nico crack up. In fact, she doesn't stop laughing until Maki speaks again.

“You know,” she says, and her voice is softer now. “A few hours ago I thought this was the worst birthday of my life. And now…”

Nico runs up ahead of her and strikes a pose in the middle of the sidewalk. “You’re so glad that Nico showed up and saved the day?”

Maki hums skeptically. “I don’t know about that. All you did is drink my wine.”

“Exactly! It’s all thanks to me that you didn’t fall off your chair and totally embarrass yourself.”

Maki rolls her eyes. “Well, thanks for being a hero,” she drawls. Nico’s all ready to demand some real sincerity when Maki stops short and looks her in the eye, clearing her throat.

“But… really. I had a lot of fun. I’m glad you came, Nico.”

The world seems to slow down. Nico’s breath catches in her throat. She’s seen Maki in a dozen different outfits, all perfect eyeshadow and pouty, pink lips, under some of the most sophisticated lighting equipment in the world. Even with her bad attitude, Maki’s looked good since the first time Nico ever laid eyes on her.

But at this very second, Nico knows. She knows that, standing under the streetlight, her chin lifted slightly, her mouth pulled into the softest, shyest smile, Maki’s never been more beautiful.

“Nico?”

Maki’s long eyelashes flutter and Nico returns to reality.

“N-No problem,” she chokes out. She coughs and averts her gaze quickly, making a show of turning towards the street. “Now, where are all the taxis, anyway?” she demands loudly.

Her heart’s still racing, even after she’s turned away. Just what in the world is wrong with her tonight? This is Maki she’s talking about. Snooty scientist Maki, who up until just a few weeks ago basically treated modeling like a huge joke. The only reason she’s here at all is because Maki needed a stand-in for Tsubasa.

Tsubasa, who isn’t here. Tsubasa, who only seems to be letting Maki down lately.

It’s utter blasphemy, she realizes. But though Nico’s sure Tsubasa would've made a beautiful, sophisticated date for Maki, she can't picture the two of them doubled over in laughter together in their plush opera seats. In fact, she can't picture Tsubasa being here at all.

It's a terrible thing to think, but it's the first time Nico's ever considered that maybe Tsubasa could learn a thing or two from her about being a good girlfriend. That if Tsubasa’s so busy she needs to conduct a business trip on her own girlfriend’s birthday weekend, then maybe they shouldn’t be dating at all.

Nico feels a stab of guilt. She's definitely not in a position to judge, _especially_ considering how much Tsubasa’s done for her. Nico needs to watch her step. She needs to remember her place in all this. She’s pretty sure the CEO of an internationally renowned company wouldn’t be thrilled to know a lowly Beauty Advisor is meddling in her personal life.

But if Tsubasa actually made time for Maki, then maybe Nico wouldn’t have to be here picking up the pieces.

A small, white car pulls up to the curb where they’re waiting, and Nico breathes out a sigh of relief.

“Finally!” she exclaims as the door pops open. She gestures for Maki to get inside. “Text me when you make it back alive, okay?”

“Sure, I’ll- oh.” Maki frowns. “I don't have your number.”

There’s an awkward fumbling as Maki unlocks her phone and hands it over to Nico, who quickly types in her contact information. “There you go! Now you have no excuses.”

Maki nods and takes the phone back. “What about you? Do you want to share the taxi?”

“Nah, I'll just get the subway or something,” she says, and Maki’s nose crinkles. “It’s fine. I ride it every day. Thanks again for a fun night. And Happy Birthday!”

“Thank you.” Maki’s gaze is warm even in the dim light. She hesitates, dithering almost comically between Nico and the cab. “Well… Bye, then.”

She lingers on the curb for a moment longer before turning away. Nico watches as she carefully lowers herself into the back seat, and she’s struck with the feeling of incompletion, like there’s something she forgot to say.  She knows she should get going, but her feet remain rooted to the ground.

She opens her mouth and, before she can stop herself, she raises her voice.

“Maki!”

Maki looks back at her, her earrings catching the light as she tilts her head expectantly.

Nico swallows. She has no idea what’s gotten into her. She doesn’t even know what she wants to say. She just knows that she can’t let the night end quite yet, not on this note.

She drinks in Maki’s dress, her curled hair, her bright, inquisitive eyes one final time before she speaks.

“You looked nice tonight.”

Maki doesn't say anything. She just nods after a moment and shuts the door. Nico waves as the car drives off, even though she can't see through its tinted windows.

The flush of Maki’s cheeks and the soft surprise on her parted lips stay on Nico’s mind long after the taxi lights have faded away into the darkness.

 

 

 

**ii.**

Maki’s phone buzzes against her thigh and she resists the urge to check it immediately. Instead, she keeps smiling and nodding at her uncle, who’s been bragging about his new clinical trials for the past ten minutes. Family dinners are always like this. Regardless of the occasion, they’re always an opportunity for her relatives to try out-do each other with their achievements. When her parents mentioned they were arranging one to celebrate Maki’s birthday - four days late to fit around all of their schedules - she’d prepared herself to be quizzed on all aspects of her life. But, right now at least, she seems to be off the hook.

Her phone vibrates again insistently and this time, she gives in and peeks under the table.

_oh, family dinner? Nico bets it’s super fancy~_

Maki bites back a loud sigh and rolls her eyes. With one hand, she thumbs back a reply. _They’re just talking about the hospital. I can barely keep my eyes open_

Nico texts back a string of snoring emojis. _does Maki ever have any fun??_

Maki frowns as she pictures the annoyingly smug expression Nico must be making. _Frequently. Lots of it._

Nico fires back instantly. _Opera music and stuffy family dinners are ur idea of fun???_

Maki has no idea how she manages to type so fast. Since that night at the opera, they’ve exchanged a handful messages, enough for Maki to realize that Nico’s just about as annoying over text as she is in person. There doesn’t seem to be a moment when she doesn’t have her phone on hand, and if Maki takes too long to reply, she's overwhelmed with an alarming number of enquiries as to what she could possibly be doing that's more important than engaging in frivolous conversation.

Honestly, though, Maki can’t say she entirely hates it. Texting Nico is fun. It gives her someone to talk to, something to do when she’s filling in the gaps of her day. She’s never really had that before - Tsubasa usually prefers calling.

Of course, texting Nico has its downsides as well.

“...isn’t that right, Maki?”

She’s shocked back into reality as Tsubasa nudges her and gives her a warning glance.

When Maki looks up sheepishly, the entire table - her mother, father, aunt and uncle - has turned to face her. She hastily drops her phone back into her lap, ignoring the way it buzzes several more times.

“R-Right,” she says, with no idea what she’s just agreed to. Thankfully, no one seems to notice how distracted she is.

“But what about the import costs?” presses her uncle. “Have you taken that into account? Is the profit margin even worth it?”

Tsubasa flashes a brilliant smile. “Well, maybe not, if you don’t have the right contacts…”

Maki relaxes as the conversation moves on. She takes a moment to admire how handily Tsubasa commands everyone’s attention and respect. It hadn’t been easy, getting her conservative family to accept that she’s dating a woman, but Tsubasa can charm her way into just about anything. Of course, her being the CEO of a multi-billion yen company hasn’t exactly hurt her chances. But Maki’s always been proud of the way Tsubasa seems to flourish in social situations where others might falter.

And, Maki reflects dryly, it’s nice to actually sit with her at a dinner table. It’d hurt so much when Tsubasa told her that she couldn’t make it to her birthday dinner - so much that she’d even resorted to calling _Nico Yazawa_ of all people for help. Normally, she’d just ask her best friends, Rin and Hanayo to join her. But the dinner was a two-person affair, and at the time, hopped up on wine, she'd reasoned that Nico was the only person who really had any idea that her relationship with Tsubasa isn’t exactly all sunshine and rainbows right now. Before she knew it, she was on the Kira Cosmetics website searching for local store numbers.

Thankfully, by some miracle, her rash decision hadn't turned out terrible. Nico might be irritating sometimes, but Maki never really expected her to be so reliable. So _kind._ Twice, she dropped her selfish relationship complaints on someone that really shouldn’t care at all. And both times, Nico went out of her way to not only listen, but to cheer her up too. Thanks to her, Maki ended up having one of the nicest nights she’s had in a long, long time.

And despite Maki's initial mortification when she'd woken up with a dry mouth and a pounding headache, it’s a memory that warms her chest when she thinks back to it.

She wasn’t even angry when Tsubasa had rushed in the next morning and apologized profusely.

“It happens,” she’d said. “Flights get cancelled all the time. It’s not your fault.”

Both she and Tsubasa had been surprised at just how much she meant it. Tsubasa had lingered a little longer on the topic, obviously suspicious of her good fortune, but she’s always been one for moving forward. Instead of prying further, she’d made a conscious effort to clear her schedule, making sure nothing would get in the way of her being here tonight.

And Maki's thankful of the support. She's thankful that this year’s birthday dinner is running much smoother than last year’s, when they’d initially revealed that they were dating. And even if the conversation is a little dull, at least she has a distraction.

Her screen lights up with yet another notification.

_so speaking of fun, are u free this weekend?_

Maki regards her phone with great suspicion. _Maybe. Why?_

The typing bubbles pop up, then fade away. Maki straightens up to check that the coast is clear and that no one is paying any attention to her, then goes back to scrutinizing her chat with Nico intently. This might be the first time Nico’s taken longer than a minute to respond.

Finally, her phone buzzes again. _Nozomi wants to go somewhere on Saturday but Eli’s gonna be there too and they’re soooo gross together and I don’t wanna 3rd wheel. Wanna come?_

Maki reads the message several times over. She waits for the punchline, for Nico to tell her she’s just kidding, but it doesn’t come. After a long minute, she decides that maybe Nico is seriously inviting her to hang out.

Cautiously, she asks, _Where?_

_idk she wont tell me just said to bring comfortable shoes and were taking the JR_

Maki grimaces. She hates public transportation and avoids it at all costs, preferring to drive or even take a taxi - which had annoyed Nico for some reason when the subject had come up.

She sits back in her chair and contemplates the invitation. On one hand, it seems like a pain. Sure, Nico’s been witness to some of her more embarrassingly vulnerable moments, but are they close enough to hang out so frequently? She likes Eli well enough, but Nozomi has a sly streak that reeks of danger. She seems nice too, but it does makes Maki a little wary, having no idea what she's committing to.

But she doesn't exactly have anything better to do. And at this point, she probably does owe Nico a favor. It pains her to admit it, but there's a small part of Maki that genuinely wants to accept right away. They did have fun last time they were all out together.

After several false starts to a response, Maki settles on a non-committal, _I'll think about it._ Then she turns off her screen and tucks her phone neatly out of sight before Nico can type a reply. In an excellent display of self-control, Maki resists the urge to check it again. It's time for her to get involved in the conversation that's happening around her. Even if it is just boring business talk.

“...Our financial projections are definitely looking good for this year,” Tsubasa says confidently. “And I’m sure the new campaign will exceed our expectations, although of course, I am a little biased.” She turns her head towards Maki and beams.

Maki forces herself to smile back, as a weight sinks in her stomach. The campaign. Her family doesn't know about the campaign. She did mean to tell them, of course. It just... slipped her mind, that’s all. She opens her mouth to say something, but her mother gets there first.

“What are you working on this time?” she asks politely.

“Oh, you know. Maki’s campaign.” Tsubasa looks around the table eagerly. Her smile falters when she’s met with nothing but blank stares in return. Too late, she catches Maki shaking her head subtly from side to side in the corner of her eye. “You didn’t…”

“Are you trying your hand at marketing?” her father asks. There’s a mild concern in his eyes that Maki suspects has something to do with his strong opinion that the cosmetics industry is frivolous in comparison to medicine. “Well... as long as your research is your priority, there’s no harm in learning new business skills.”

The rest of the table falls so quiet that Maki’s very tempted to go hide in the bathroom. But when she feels Tsubasa’s eyes on her, she knows she has to speak up.

“A-Actually,” Maki mutters, “I’m trying out modelling...”

There’s a long, stilted silence where no one reacts.

“Modelling?” Her father repeats, slowly.

“Well,” her aunt says, giving Maki a skeptical once over, “I suppose she does have the figure for it...”

“I haven’t quit my job at the lab,” Maki clarifies, quickly. “It’s just a… a side project.” She winces when she sees the look in Tsubasa’s eyes. She knows she’s said the wrong thing. “No, uh - I mean-”

She flushes and searches for a better way to explain, highly aware of all the eyes upon her. Just when she’s seriously considering feigning a sudden illness, however, Tsubasa puts a hand on her shoulder.

“I asked Maki to assist me with a new line scheduled for later this year,” she says smoothly. “She’s been _very_ supportive. I don’t know what I’d do without her.”

Maki isn't quite sure if she's just imagining the hint of reproach in Tsubasa's tone but either way, she's grateful for the save. Her girlfriend has always known how to deal with her family. For better or worse, they basically eat out of the palm of her hand.

Her father looks utterly unconvinced, but there’s a spark of interest in her mother’s eye already. Tsubasa latches onto this and pulls out her phone.

“She’s absolutely stunning. I have some photos saved…”

Tsubasa angles her phone towards Maki's parents. Her mother gasps. “Oh my. Doesn’t she look beautiful?”

She beams proudly at Maki, who feels her cheeks burning as the phone is slowly passed around the table. She receives a mixture of nods of approval and questioning looks as the phone makes its way back to Tsubasa. This isn't exactly how she wanted her family to find out she was trying out something so embarrassing, but at least it’s over with quickly. They've all had a look now. At least there's not any -

“I have more!” Tsubasa turns towards Maki's parents again and Maki shrinks down in her seat. Her aunt’s chair scrapes across the floor as she leaves her seat to peer over their shoulders. Even the butler who's topping up their drinks leans in to have a look. Her mother's practically cooing in delight, and it's great that she approves and all, but it kills Maki, just a little, that she can't see which photos they’re looking at. What if they're the humiliating ones where she's pouting or flicking her hair or _\- oh no_. Please god, not the ones where Eli and Nico kept yelling at her to be more seductive.

“Will you send me these?” Her mother asks excitedly. “I _must_ show my friends. And I'll print out a copy for Grandma-”

“Of course,” Tsubasa chirps.

“No,” Maki says, quickly. “Don’t show Grandma.”

Her mother tilts her head. “Why not? These are wonderful. My little Maki's all grown up _and_ she's a model!”

“Don’t be so embarrassing,” Maki groans. “Please don't show everyone.”

“Well, I think you should be quite proud of these,” her aunt says.

Her father makes a soft grunt, and Maki prepares herself for the worse. “At least they look… professional.”

Her uncle nods, and Maki’s surprised to find he’s joined the crowd of people around Tsubasa’s phone. “You must have an excellent photographer.”

“The best there is,” Tsubasa says, proudly. She leans back into her seat, placing her phone down on table. “We have a wonderful team. I know Maki's especially fond of our makeup artist.”

Maki's whole body tenses. Fond of _Nico_? Why would anyone think that? Just because they've been texting a little doesn't mean that Nico's her favorite person in the world or anything. She's about to snap back with some defensive statement and then she realizes that Tsubasa's just teasing her.

Because she still thinks Maki hates Nico.

She doesn't know about the opera.

It's not that Maki's been keeping their weird new friendship a secret. It's just that most of her civilized conversations with Nico have been _about_ Tsubasa - specifically Maki being pissed off at her - so it's not exactly been a priority on the list of things to tell her girlfriend.

And she did mention she invited a friend to join her for her birthday dinner when Tsubasa couldn't make it. _Someone from work_ , she said, because it was easier. She would’ve told Tsubasa it was Nico if she'd asked. But she didn't so... Maki just thought she'd save it for another time. It's kind of mortifying, after all, admitting that she went to the effort to drunk dial someone she's openly complained about hating multiple times.

And now might have been a good opportunity to admit that things are a little different lately. To admit that her phone has buzzed multiple times during this conversation with messages from that very makeup artist she’s supposed to hate. But her family members are all here. And it'd take a lot of explaining to catch them up.

So Maki does what’s easiest. She crinkles her nose in distaste at the mention of Nico, and feels a prickling of guilt when Tsubasa laughs and continues to assume that nothing has changed.

***

The rest of the dinner is a welcome blur of good food and sweet wine. Maki was honestly expecting her family to make more of a scene about the whole modelling thing. Maybe the updates she'd shared about her research had reassured them that she hadn’t sacrificed her intelligence to model. Or maybe they’re finally starting to see her as an adult who can make her own decisions. Maybe Tsubasa's charisma is so powerful that not even the often strongly opinionated Nishikinos would ever dare to disagree with her.

Whatever the reason, she's pleasantly surprised when she realizes they’ve made it through an entire family dinner without anyone trying to talk her out of it. She’s even a little disappointed when her uncle glances at his watch and announces that they’d better get going soon.

It’s just been so _nice_ , celebrating her birthday with her parents and her girlfriend, and the alcohol has made her so warm and relaxed. She hugs her parents goodbye in the hallway as they linger, waiting for the taxi to take Maki and Tsubasa home.

“Thank you for joining us today,” her father says.

“It’s always a pleasure.” Tsubasa flashes a charming smile, and Maki shakes her head as her father asks her yet _another_ question about her brilliant business model.

Maki turns to her mother and smiles. “Thanks for this. Dinner was great.”

Her mother pulls her in for another hug. “I’m so glad you had time in your busy schedule. Research, modelling…” She cups her by the cheeks fondly. “You really are all grown up now.”

Maki blushes. “Come on. You know I’ll always make time for you two.”

“You say that,” teases her mother. “But I know you’d rather be at the opera or something. How was that, anyway? Your father and I have been meaning to go…”

“Oh, I’d definitely recommend it,” Maki says, nodding gratefully as a housekeeper hands her jacket over. “I mean, I probably missed half of it because Nico was being super rude the whole time but-”

Maki stiffens, her arm caught awkwardly in the sleeve of her jacket. She steals a quick glance at Tsubasa, wondering if her girlfriend had heard that slip of the tongue. She’s still deep in conversation with her father, and Maki feels mysteriously like she’s just dodged a bullet. But sadly her relief is short-lived.

“Nico? Who’s that?” Her mother smiles with innocent curiosity.

Tsubasa’s ears prick up this time and she turns her head. Her gaze meets Maki’s and her face flashes with intrigue and confusion and... something else. Something more complex.

“Nico...?” Tsubasa questions, her voice a soft, barely audible murmur.

Maki’s eyes dart between her parents and her girlfriend. The taxi’s headlights flash through the window as it pulls into the driveway.

“She’s a friend from work,” Maki blurts out. “We’d better get going-” She grabs Tsubasa’s elbow and half-pulls, half-shoves her out of the house.

The taxi driver holds open the car door for them as they clamber in. Tsubasa is oddly quiet as Maki waves goodbye to her parents, who stand in the driveway to see them off. She keeps her gaze trained out the window long after they’ve pulled out of the mansion grounds, pretending to take an intense interest in the scenery flashing by. The farce doesn’t last for long.

“You didn’t tell me you went with Nico,” Tsubasa says suddenly, breaking the heavy silence.

There’s no reason for it, but Maki finds herself feeling defensive anyway. “I told you it was someone from work…”

“Yeah. I thought you meant Rin or Hanayo.” She pauses, then adds in a lower voice, “Besides, the campaign is just a ‘side project,’ right? Not a real job or anything.”

“I didn’t mean that.” Maki struggles to make her voice soft. She hesitates, then reaches out and puts her hand on Tsubasa’s arm. “You know how my family is. I panicked.”

Tsubasa shakes her head, brushing off Maki's touch. “This is nothing new. You’ve never taken my work seriously.”

“That’s not true!”

“You’ve always looked down on the cosmetics industry. Since it’s just…what was it? _Cashing in on the insecurity of women everywhere_.”

“Are you ever gonna let that go?” Maki sighs in exasperation. She made one little comment in an argument years ago and Tsubasa has never forgotten it. “That was a long time ago. A-And I don’t think that now.”

“Uh-huh.”  

“No, really.” Maki furrows her brow in concentration as she searches for a way to explain herself. “Helping with the campaign…It changed my mind. I never knew how hard you worked.”

Tsubasa’s posture seems to relax just a fraction. “Go on…” she says slowly as she crosses her arms and leans back against the leather seat. Maki grimaces. She’s going to need to be a lot sweeter - something she’s kind of forgotten how to do. She closes her eyes and tries to channel Nico’s unending imagination for praising Tsubasa.

“I didn’t see it at first. I never understood why you were so busy. But I get it now. I get that a lot of thought and effort goes into coming up with new products, that you have to run a business _and_ keep up your brand’s high standards.”

Tsubasa shrugs dismissively. “But it’s not science. Or _medicine_. I know your family thinks-”

“I’m not my family,” Maki insists. “What you do is important. A-And I’m sorry it took so long for me to appreciate that.”

Tsubasa studies Maki quietly, and although she doesn’t respond, Maki knows she’s listening. So she keeps trying. She presses on desperately.

“I think it’s actually really great that so many people love your makeup. I think you’ve really made a difference in a lot of women’s lives and I-”  She stops when she sees that Tsubasa’s shoulders are shaking. It takes a confused second for Maki to recognize that she’s laughing.

“W-What?” she demands, scooting back against the side of the car, the tips of her ears burning.

Tsubasa reigns in her mirth with considerable difficulty and wipes her eyes. “Nothing, nothing.” She shakes her head. “It’s just rare for you to be so… honest, I guess.” When she looks at Maki again, her expression is considerably softer. “I kinda like it.”

Maki flushes hard. She kind of just wants to sink down into the slightly sticky car seats and disappear forever. Instead, she takes a deep breath and tries to keep her gaze steady.

“I mean it, you know,” she says, and Tsubasa nods.

“I know.” She takes Maki’s hand and brushes her thumb across the back of her knuckles. “But it’s nice to hear it.”

It makes Maki a little guilty, hearing how easily Tsubasa lets her off when she has at least some right to be angry. She squeezes back, hoping her girlfriend will understand just how much she appreciates her good temperament. Tsubasa smiles at the gesture.

“Now that you’re done telling me how much you love me,” she starts, and chuckles when Maki rolls her eyes a little. “What’s this I hear about Nico?”

Maki cringes. She'd forgotten about that slip of the tongue. She should just explain. It’s not like she has anything to hide.

“She, uh, came to the opera with me. Like I said. She was the only person available. That’s all.”

Tsubasa raises a skeptical eyebrow. “And when did you two become friends? I thought you hated her.”

Maki winces. “I never _hated_ her…” she begins hollowly, but when Tsubasa gives her an disbelieving look, she relents. “Okay. Maybe I did, just a bit.”

The corner of Tsubasa’s mouth twitches. “You tried to get her fired.”

“Well, maybe I was wrong about her.” Maki feels her cheeks heat up the moment the words leave her mouth. “B-But it’s not like we're best friends or anything.”

“You like her enough to invite her to the opera,” Tsubasa points out, grinning.

“She wasn't my _first_ choice,” Maki says, defensively. “I was desperate!”

Tsubasa hums. “But you had fun, right?”

Maki feels a rush of warmth at the memory of the two of them stumbling down the street drunkenly, looking like some ridiculous comedy duo. “Yeah. I did.”

“You made a friend all by yourself?” Tsubasa smiles teasingly. “We’ll make a social butterfly out of you yet.”

“It’s not a big deal. Nico’s just… persistent.”

Tsubasa smirks at the description, but she seems satisfied with Maki’s story. “Well, it’s a good time for you to discover your gregarious side,” she remarks, then flashes her teeth eagerly. “We’re still on for the business party this Saturday right?”

“Yeah, I-” Maki freezes. The stupid party. She’d forgotten. Nico's vague, mildly suspicious invitation immediately comes to mind, and her stomach sinks. But it's not like she gave an actual answer yet. She’d left it at _I'll think about it,_ and despite her usual incessant messaging, Nico hadn’t pressed for a more definitive response.

Tsubasa notices the change in her demeanor and cocks her head. “What’s up?”

Maki bites her lip. She hates those parties that Tsubasa’s always taking her to, with all those middle-aged men milling around expensive ice sculptures and posturing either suggestively or aggressively at Tsubasa, depending on whether they’re seeking a marriage or a business deal. Usually she sucks it up and just goes along, if only because it makes Tsubasa so much happier when she does. It’s not like she’s busy on the weekends, anyway.

But, if she has a legitimate excuse for not going…

“Actually,” Maki begins cautiously, “Nico invited me to hang out with her that day. With Eli and her other friend too. Kinda weird, right?”

“Oh.” Tsubasa sounds taken aback. “Where?”

“I-I’m not sure.” She plays with a stray strand of hair instead of making eye contact. “It’s probably nothing anyway. I haven’t replied yet. I’ll just say no.”

“Don’t!” Tsubasa reaches out and pushes her wrist away as Maki makes a movement to pull out her phone from her purse. When Maki startles and looks up, she nods encouragingly. “You should go.”

“R-Really?” Maki regards her girlfriend with caution. This almost feels like a test or something. “No. I couldn't. I already said I'd-”

“I don't mind,” Tsubasa shrugs elegantly. If she's hard to read on a good day, it's almost impossible to tell what she's thinking in this dim light. “Go have fun. You never enjoy those parties anyway, right?”

Maki winces. She always tries not to complain about those social events too much, but apparently she's more transparent than she thought.

“No. Your work is important,” Maki says, with as much determination as she can muster. “S-So I should support that.”

Maki feels mildly offended at the way Tsubasa giggles.

“It’s cute that you're finally taking an interest, but I still think you should go. I'm glad you're making friends.”

“But-”

“ _Honestly_ ,” Tsubasa’s tone is warm, but decisively final. “It's rare to see you with such an active social life. Maybe my campaign _is_ having a positive influence on you after all.”

Maki hesitates for a moment longer, but her resolve weakens. She didn’t want to go to the party anyway. She pouts and flops dramatically against Tsubasa’s side, leaning into her warmth. Tsubasa shifts to make room for her and puts a gentle arm around.

“I really am sorry, you know.” Maki mumbles into her shoulder. “About that stupid ‘side project’ comment.”

“Don't worry about it,” Tsubasa says softly. She runs her fingers through Maki’s hair, and it’s a soothing feeling. A silence settles between them for the rest of the car ride, only this time, it’s a comfortable one. She can’t remember the last time they were so relaxed, so at peace.

Things haven’t been easy lately. In fact, there’s been a whole bunch of times when Maki’s felt certain that relationships are more trouble than they’re worth. But right now, she feels hopeful that things will get better.

And a part of her knows that she has Nico Yazawa to thank for all of it.

It’s weird, knowing that in just over a month, someone she couldn’t stand the sight of has become one of the most supportive people in her life. Of course, she’d be far too embarrassed to ever admit that to Nico, but it’s nice to have someone who listens. Someone on her side.

Yeah, Maki really is grateful. She doesn’t know how to thank Nico. But accompanying her to some mystery location so she doesn’t have to be a third wheel on her own is probably a good place to start.

She doesn’t message Nico when she’s in the taxi. She waits until she’s home, until she’s finished showering and brushing her teeth and she’s lying in bed. Nico’s surely asleep - it’s so late that Tsubasa’s already passed out next to Maki, breathing slow and steady. There’s no way she'll check her messages before morning, but Maki still waits until the last possible moment, until she can’t put it off any longer, before she finally she types out a reply.

 _I can come_.

It’s just three little words. Nothing unusual, nothing groundbreaking. But the _promise_ in them fills her with excitement anyway. Maki lays in the dark thinking about it long after she puts down her phone.

It’s a long time before she can fall asleep.


	5. Freefall

**Chapter 5**

**i.**

Nico never thought things would end this way. She always pictured herself as a glamorous old lady, surrounded by flowers and adoring fans. She never once considered that she'd meet her demise at the bottom of a 250-foot drop.

“Will you stop saying we're going to die?” Maki hisses from beside her, as their car climbs further up the roller coaster track. Even in a life-threatening situation like this one Maki’s trying her best to sound cool and collected, but Nico hears the way her voice trembles.

“I'm too small,” Nico whines. “What if I fly out?”

She's not ready for this. It's not even ten in the morning. She knew they should've gone for the teacups first!

“Did we measure you on the height chart?” Nozomi calls out, her voice loud over the chains pulling them up the track.

“We'll all be fine,” Eli says. “We'll all be-” Her voice trails off as their car finally reaches the apex. “Oh, fuck…”

Nico registers dimly in the back of her mind that it’s the first time she’s ever heard Eli curse, but it’s a short-lived observation. It’s the last thought she’ll ever have.

“It's fine,” Maki says hurriedly. “It's physics. It's-”

Nico's not sure which one of them screams louder as the track drops abruptly beneath them. They hurtle downwards at what is almost definitely a million miles per second, and Nico resolves that if they manage to get out of this alive, she’s going to personally kill Nozomi with her bare hands.

When their feet finally touch the ground again, all of them are breathless. Nico's entirely surprised that her heart hasn’t given out with how fast it’s beating.

“That,” she declares, hopping off her seat, “was _amazing!_ ” She takes one look at Maki and bursts into laughter.

Maki frowns, her cheeks still tinged pink from the ride. “W-What?” she demands as she struggles to undo the seatbelt.

“Your hair’s, like, _everywhere_.” Nico giggles and helps Maki out of her safety straps. Maki quickly runs a hand through her messy red locks, trying to smooth out the wind from them. She fakes a scowl, but there’s no hiding how bright and excited her eyes are.

Nico can’t help but smile to herself. She feels a lot better about inviting Maki out now.

She’d had her doubts at first. Of course, most people would jump to be in the presence of the one and only Nico Yazawa. But Maki isn’t “most people.” And when Nozomi had revealed that they were going to an _amusement park_ of all places, Nico was sure she’d change her mind and refuse to come.

But she hadn’t. She’d shown up at Tokyo station at the ungodly hour of 7 am and when Nico caught sight of her, an inexplicable rush of warmth bloomed in her chest.

Of course, Nico only invited her to improve team relations. That’s the only conceivable reason, at least. She hadn’t thought about it too much when she was pacing around her small living room nervously, checking her phone every two minutes, but obviously she’d only wanted what was best for Tsubasa’s campaign. It’s better if they all continue to get along, right? Getting Maki to come was just killing two birds with one stone - team bonding and avoiding being a third wheel, all at once. She’d felt sure it was perfect plan!

But she’s had this nervous flutter in her stomach all week just thinking about it, if only because Maki’s moods are entirely unpredictable. When she’d shown up looking irritated and bleary-eyed, Nico had felt certain this whole thing was a terrible lapse of judgement. Maki seemed less than enthused throughout most of the train ride over, enough to make Nico wonder if anyone would really mind if they _accidentally_ lost her at the station or in left her behind on the train.

But right now, she feels reassured that this might just be a fun day after all. Maki actually seems like she might be pleased to be here. Well, as much as someone as stubborn as her can be pleased about anything.

“That wasn’t too bad,” Maki comments after she’s stood up and brushed herself off. She’s mostly regained her composure, though her breathing is still a little fast.

Nico snorts. “Are you sure? Because I think I heard you screaming literally nonstop the entire ride.”

“T-That wasn’t me!”

“Just admit it! You were _terrified._ ”

“I was not!” Maki scans their surroundings. “Hey, where are Nozomi and Eli?”

Good point. They've made it all the way to the exit gate without realizing that their friends are missing. Nico turns around and spots them lagging far behind. They pause, allowing the other passengers to leave ahead of them.

“What took you so long?” Nico complains when the couple finally catches up. Then she sees how pale Eli’s countenance is. “Oh. Uh, are you okay?”

Nozomi lends Eli her shoulder as they step off the ride platform. She smiles reassuringly. “She’s fine. Elicchi just didn’t expect it to be so… exciting.”

Eli shakes her head weakly and waves her hand in a half-hearted manner. “I’m… okay…” she groans. It’s thoroughly unconvincing. “I just need a moment.”

Nozomi titters. “She’s not good with fast rides,” she confides in a mock whisper.

Eli buries her face in her hands. Nico and Maki exchange smirks; it's still a shock how the outwardly calm and collected Eli could be so adorably lame.

“Wanna sit down for a minute?” Maki asks.

Nico tries her best not to pout. She doesn't want to be all selfish and unsympathetic, but there's an even wilder looking roller coaster calling out her name in the distance and now that she's started on the adrenaline train, she can barely stop herself from charging over there.

Thankfully, Eli lets out a shuddering breath and straightens up. “No. It’s fine. Let’s just… ride something gentler next.”

Nozomi links her arm through Eli’s. “My brave knight,” she teases. Nico fights the urge to gag.

“Come on, let’s go,” she snaps. Without thinking, she grabs Maki’s elbow and pulls ahead. It’s not until Maki digs in her heels a little that she remembers who she’s walking with. Normally she wouldn’t hesitate to hang off any of her other friends’ arms if she thought it’d help them move faster, but Maki’s an entirely different story.

Just because they don’t know each other that well. At least, that’s the only reason that comes to mind.

Out of the corner of her eye, Nico sees Nozomi gazing at her with a pensive expression. Which is totally is odd, because she hasn’t done anything to warrant such a suspicious look! Nico grips Maki’s elbow harder and faces forward, determined to ignore whatever Nozomi’s got going on in her head. Maki tenses under her touch, but Nico pretends not to notice. Why is everyone being so weird today? They really need to get on another ride soon.

“Swings next!” she orders, marching forth once more. And despite the sudden strange vibe that’s settled between them, her friends follow.

***

The sun remains pleasant and warm above their heads throughout the day as they make their way through the park. After the mishap with the first roller coaster, they’re careful to alternate between the slower rides and the thrillers. Even with that, though, Eli tires out quickly, much to her embarrassment. More often than not, she ends up sitting out on the side catching her breath, with Nozomi more than happy to keep her company.

And that leaves just Nico and Maki. Not that it’s a problem or anything. Nico doesn’t mind too much. It's nice to have someone to ride with, someone to talk to while they wait. And honestly, it’s a pretty convenient system. Trying to get all four of them on the more popular attractions is a pain. With just the two of them, they move through lines much faster. Nico has no complaints at all, except for the vague fluttering in her chest that won't go away.

Being alone with Maki like this is a little strange. Sure, they've been in each other's approximate vicinity multiple times, with the campaign, and the after-shoot drinks that one time, and then that whole impromptu opera thing. That part is nothing new.

Usually, however, Maki is either scowling or on the verge of tears. Nico has to practically drag conversation out of her, and even then she's less than forthcoming. Maki always makes things so much more difficult than they need to be. If she were any less interesting, Nico wouldn't bother at all.

But the Maki Nishikino next to her right now is more relaxed than Nico's ever seen her. She tries to play it cool at first, of course, acting like she's too mature to be fazed by a mere roller coaster. After a few rides, though, she gradually loosens up. Her whole demeanor changes. With a loose, carefree grin, a playful twinkle in her violet eyes and not a hint of a wrinkle between her eyebrows, Maki practically looks like a whole other person. When they stop to watch a group of the park mascots stage a mock fight, her face lights up with a childish delight, and Nico catches herself wondering if Tsubasa always gets to see her like this.

“You can ask for a picture, you know.” She elbows Maki in the ribs, nudging her forward, but Maki backpedals furiously.

“I don’t want one,” she insists, but Nico is already waving at the masked superhero team to get their attention. Ignoring Maki’s protests, she drags her over and positions her next to the leader in red. He obliges enthusiastically, beckoning with over-the-top gestures at the other heroes until they’re all crowded around a scarlet-faced Maki.

Despite her loud complaints, when Nico examines the picture afterwards, she’s pleased to find Maki’s smiling. It’s a little blurry and the resolution isn’t great, but it’s still maybe one of the nicest photos Nico’s ever seen of her, and that includes the ones Eli’s taken with her fancy camera. A confusing smugness rises in her chest at the sight of Maki’s flushed cheeks and sheepish grin.

“I look terrible.” Nico jumps and looks up to see Maki peering over her shoulder. “Delete it.”

She reaches out to take the phone, but Nico dances away.

“Nope. It’s mine now~” she sings. “I’m keeping it forever!”

Maki gives chase immediately, and they both laugh as they weave through and around the other park guests. Nico only skids to a halt when she sees how Nozomi is staring at her. For once, she’s not gazing adoringly at Eli. Her brows furrow in concentration. She looks deep in thought, and for some reason, that sends a shiver of unease up Nico’s spine.

“Right,” she declares, abruptly shoving the phone into her purse. Maki pulls up, puffing from the exertion. Nico gets the impression she doesn’t exercise much. “What should we go on next?”

Maki wavers, as if considering whether badgering Nico further about the photo would be worth the effort. Finally, she sighs and scans the horizon and points at the drop tower.

“That one.” Nico blanches, which doesn’t escape Maki’s notice. She smiles slyly, raising an eyebrow. “Oh? Too scared?”

Nico shudders, then clenches her fists. There’s no way she’s going to lose this game. Even if that means enduring a 200-foot free fall. “Hell no. Let’s go!”

“I think Eli and I will give this one a pass,” Nozomi calls out. Eli nods in relieved agreement next to her. “We’re going to go browse the shops. You two have fun!”

It’s super weird, the way she gives Nico a long, meaningful look. Nico’s face heats up. She has no idea what Nozomi is implying, but she knows instinctively that she doesn’t like it. Not one bit.

“We will,” she huffs. “Come on, Maki!”

Nico sets off without another word with Maki trailing slightly behind her, muttering about the photo. She can feel Nozomi’s eyes on her back as they walk away. Tempting though it is, she resists the urge to turn around and call out that whatever she’s thinking is totally wrong. Nozomi’s a caring friend, but she’s not the type to keep her _concerns_ to herself. Somehow, Nico knows it’s only a matter of time before she sticks her nose where it doesn’t belong.

***

“You and Maki seem to be getting along well.”

When Nico turns her head, Nozomi's expression is exactly how she pictured it. Warm and knowing, with just a hint of concern. Nico resists the urge to sigh. She knew this was coming. But she didn't think it would happen in the line for the crepe stand. It all makes sense now. _That's_ why Nozomi kindly insisted Maki and Eli should sit down and wait for them to go grab food.

Nico shrugs in a nonchalant manner. “Well, you know. We _are_ friends now.”

Nozomi hums softly. “It's a shame Tsubasa couldn't make it today, isn't it?”

“Yeah, it is,” Nico agrees, and she means it too. She'd pay good money for a ride photo with Tsubasa in it, mostly because she strongly believes she'd still look perfectly composed and flawless even hurtling down a drop at 100 miles per hour.

“How long have they been dating again?” Nozomi asks. “Maki must be very close to her _girlfriend_.”

“Two years,” Nico answers flatly. She peeks ahead at the line, hoping the young mother with two children will hurry up and make her order. “They’re a great couple, right?”

For a moment, she dares to dream that Nozomi might just accept that and move along. But, sadly, that's never happened in the entire history of their friendship.

Nozomi gives her an annoying sympathetic look. “Is that what you really think?”

Nico sighs. In her experience, confronting Nozomi directly is a much faster route than trying to avoid her, and she’s not in the mood for any cryptic mind games. She just wants to pick up the crepe with the highest sugar content and enjoy it. She crosses her arms pointedly. “If you have something to say, then just get it over with.”

“I just,” Nozomi says in her gentlest tone, “wouldn't want to see you to get hurt.”

“And how exactly am I gonna get hurt here?” Nico snaps. “From making a friend? Eli's my friend. _You're_ my friend. There's no way expanding my social circle could ever cause me to _get hurt_.”

“Then how come you know exactly what I'm talking about?”

Something sinks in Nico's stomach. She opens her mouth to say something - _anything_ \- and the young woman at the crepe stand finally ushers them forward.

“I just know how your mind works,” Nico hisses, as the woman turns to make their food. “But you're totally wrong so stop making it weird! Just because you're all gross and mushy now doesn't mean- oh, thank you!” Nico graciously accepts the first crepe. She lowers her voice. “It doesn't mean I am too.”

Nozomi gives her a knowing look, and Nico wonders if she'd press further if their hands weren't full of delicious snacks for the four of them to enjoy. “Okay… But if you ever need to talk-”

“I don’t need to talk. I just want to eat this before all the cream melts.” And before Nozomi can continue her questioning, she grabs the food tray and carries it back to the table where the other two are waiting, taking a seat a safe distance away from Maki so Nozomi can't make any further entirely unjustified implications. Nozomi follows, and though she drops the subject for the meantime, Nico knows it's too much to hope that she's heard the last of it.

After their snack, they continue through the park at a more leisurely pace. Thanks to how early they arrived, they were able to get through all the major roller coasters in the morning without waiting around too long. Now they have plenty of time for the smaller, less violent attractions, which Eli can ride without losing a year off her life. It gives Nico a chance to put some distance between herself and Maki too, just to prove to Nozomi that she's making a lot of fuss about nothing. The important point is that all four of them are having fun together. Team bonding is the priority here, remember? They chase each other in bumper cars and spin around on the merry-go-round and everything is great.

That is, until they make the mistake of riding the teacups.

Now, Nico appreciates a good whirl as much as the next thrill seeker. But they totally underestimate just how deadly a bunch of pastel colored teacups can be. When all four of them grasp the center wheel and begin rotating it with all their strength, there’s so little resistance that they're immediately flung flat against the sides of the vehicle with all the force of a grade-A centrifuge.

By the time the ride finally stops, Eli seems all but dead to the world. They stumble out of the attraction dizzily, leaning all over each other and giggling madly. When Maki trips and catches herself against Nico's shoulder, it’s hard to ignore how warm she is. How soft her hands feels against Nico’s skin.

“We'd better take a break,” suggests Nozomi, after they've all regained their breaths. “Let's see…” Her lips curl upward mysteriously. “How about the ferris wheel?”

“That should be okay…” Eli says, weakly, and Maki nods too. Nico scowls when Nozomi tips a mischievous wink in her direction. What’s that supposed to mean, anyway? Whatever it is, Nico’s not playing right into Nozomi's hands.

“Let’s all ride together,” she suggests quickly, shooting a triumphant look in Nozomi’s direction. She refuses to feed Nozomi's fantasies any further, plus being stuck in the air in a slow moving carriage with Maki for ten minutes is a decidedly awkward prospect. Maki’s weird today and Nico doesn’t want to be alone with her. Especially not when her shoulder’s still kind of tingling from the heat of her touch.

Nico feels certain that she made the right choice as the ferris wheel starts to move and the whole park slowly comes into view. The setting sun casts a warm, orange glow over the mountains in the distance. It's dim enough that twinkling lights start to flash on, illuminating everything around them.

“What a beautiful view,” Eli gasps, leaning to look further out of the window.

Nozomi reaches gently for her hand. “Not as beautiful as you.”

Eli turns back, her cheeks flushed pink. “Nozomi…”

Nico groans loudly. “Do you two have to do this now?”

Nozomi stops making eyes at Eli for the briefest of moments. “Now, now Nicocchi. Everyone knows the ferris wheel is the most romantic ride in the park. You didn't _have_ to join us.”

“Well I didn't want to ride it on my own...” Nico mutters. “I thought you two might be able to control yourself for a few minutes.”

Eli sits up straighter and nods demurely. “There's no reason we can’t all enjoy this together. Right, Maki?”

“Huh?” Maki looks up from her lap.

Nico didn't notice before, but she's been pretty quiet since they started moving. She flashes a mischievous smile in her direction. “You're not _scared_ , are you Maki?”

Maki shakes her head quickly. “Of course not. I've been on every ride here. Why would I be scared of a dumb ferris wheel?”

Nico leans over Maki to point at the children's section. “Maybe we should've taken you on a tiny baby ride instead?”

“Will you _stop_. I'm not scared.”

Nico cackles as Maki brushes her off. She straightens herself up when she notices Nozomi watching them from across the small car.

“So Maki,” Nozomi asks. “Do you come to amusement parks often with your _girlfriend?_ ”

Nico only resists glaring because Eli would see and ask what's going on. She's totally had enough of Nozomi’s unnecessary suspicion.

“It's not really Tsubasa's thing,” Maki says. “Or mine, actually. I haven't been to an amusement park since my... 7th birthday?”

“Seriously?” Nico turns her head quickly to gawk at Maki.

“I asked to go again the next year, but my parents thought I was too old, so…” Maki chuckles, but Nico doesn’t feel any humor. She got the impression that Maki's parents were a little strict based on some things she'd said before, but that's probably the saddest thing she's ever heard.

“Well, at least you're here now,” Eli says, warmly.

“Yeah,” Maki says. “It's been a fun day.”

“Better than the opera?” Nico chirps.

“Not _quite_ as exciting.”

Maki winks and Nico giggles, and the smile they share is so warm and private, that she doesn't want to fill the others in on what happened that night. When Nozomi’s ears perk up, she pointedly avoids eye contact by looking out over the park. It's kind of funny, that it's their little secret. At least, for Nico it is. Maki probably mentioned it to Tsubasa, and Nico wonders what she said to her. How she’d described that kind of crazy night.

“That view really is incredible,” Nozomi says, and this time Nico doesn't protest when she leans in closer to Eli. It must be nice, being able to sit beside someone you love at a time like this. Nico really needs to make some single friends. Or to find an adorable girlfriend to ride ferris wheels with. It kind of sucks, being the one that's always alone.

At least Tsubasa's not here too. Something about the thought of Maki snuggling up to her girlfriend the way Eli is with Nozomi makes her stomach churn more than the teacups ever could. But that's probably only because Nico's not sure she could survive being trapped here with _two_ gross, loved up couples. Yeah. That's got to be the reason.

“Look,” Maki points at a tall ride in the distance, “there’s the one that made Nico cry.”

“I didn’t cry!” Nico snaps. “More like Eli crying on the merry-go-round...”

“I _liked_ the merry-go-round,” Eli insists. “Though maybe it could’ve gone a little slower…”

“I think Elicchi was very brave today,” Nozomi says, proudly. “And her terrified face was _adorable_.”

“Oh!” Maki exclaims suddenly, pulling out her phone. “That reminds me. I saved some of the ride photos. Everyone’s faces were so- oh.” She freezes.

“Everything okay?” Eli asks.

“Oh. Yeah. Fine. I just, uh. Missed a couple of calls from Tsubasa, that's all.”

“Do you need to call her back?” Nozomi asks.

Maki shakes her head. “There’s probably no signal up here. I’m sure whatever it is can wait for another five minutes.”

Nico stares down at the ground below, trying her best to ignore the sinking feeling in her stomach. Of course Maki has a _wonderful_ girlfriend at home waiting on her. That’s not news to anyone. It’s completely out of line to feel irritated at the thought of Tsubasa calling and asking her to come home but… honestly, Nico doesn’t want this day to end.

It’s not even like she’s being selfish. She just wants Maki to stay here as long as she can, in this parallel universe where she smiles and takes stupid pictures with mascots and actually enjoys herself. Where no one makes her cry. She wants the Maki she’s seen today to stick around. She wants her to be this happy all the time.

“Hey,” Maki surprises Nico out of her thoughts, as the ride slows to a standstill. “I think we’re at the top now.”

Nico averts her eyes as Nozomi and Eli lean towards each other. “Y-Yep. I think so.”

Maki pointedly ignores the couple kissing in front of them and stares out over the park instead. “It’s so pretty from up here,” she breathes, and when she looks up, her eyes are bright and warm and contented. Nico’s never seen her look so _soft._ “Today really has been fun. Thank you.” She glances over at the other two, who are too lost in their own little world to hear her, and chuckles. “All of you.”

She’s talking to everyone. She _just_ specified that. Nico might’ve been the one to send out the official invitation, but they’ve all had a great time together. And yet there’s something about the way Maki keeps her eyes fixed on Nico - something about the warmth of her smile -  that makes her think that maybe Maki’s thanking her just a _tiny_ bit more.

Nico doesn’t quite understand the complicated emotions that are stirring in her chest, but she does know that her whole body's tense and it feels like they're about to freefall directly down to the ground and she's definitely had too much adrenaline today. The ferris wheel car feels claustrophobically small. They’re so far from the ground, and Nozomi and Eli are sharing another chaste kiss, and Maki’s practically rubbing knees with Nico and she’s far too close and Nico’s not sure how much more of this she can handle. She needs to get out of here soon. The air pressure must be different up here or something. Yeah, that’s got to be it.

Nico’s the first one to hop out when they make it back down to the ground. She excuses herself immediately, weaving through the crowds and the dimly lit pathways towards the bathroom, where she spends a good few minutes just breathing in fresh air that isn’t shared by lovey-dovey couples and girls that make her feel weird. This isn’t what team building is supposed to feel like, right? Nico’s sure this whole heart-pounding bizarre euphoric nausea thing isn’t a regular occurrence when it comes to growing closer to your co-workers, but she’s not sure what else it could be.

By the time she makes her way back to the others, it’s completely dark outside.

“There you are!” Nozomi comes rushing over towards her. “Thank goodness. We were about to call security and report a missing child.”

Nico glares. “I just needed a minute. I felt kinda light headed and- hey, where’s Maki?”

Nico spots Eli lingering a few steps away, but she’s alone. Maki didn’t leave already, did she? She might be a little ill-mannered sometimes, but surely she wouldn’t just take off without saying goodbye.

“She went to call her girlfriend,” Nozomi says, as they move back towards Eli. “I’m sure she’ll be back - ah! Perfect timing. Maki - over here!”

The relaxed smile on Maki’s face has gone, and that’s concerning. She didn’t have another fight with Tsubasa, did she? Nico hopes she didn't cause any problems by dragging Maki away for the whole entire day.

“Is everything okay?” Eli asks, obviously detecting the tension too.

“It’s fine.” Maki shrugs. “She was just asking when I’d be back.”

Nico’s heart sinks. It’s childish, she knows, but she just can’t stand the idea of going back to Tokyo right now. It’s been such a perfect day. She doesn’t want to go home. She just wants to stay in this amusement park forever and live off of popcorn and corndogs for the rest of her life.

She doesn’t want Maki to leave.

It’s a stupid thought that lingers despite her best efforts to push it away. She tries not to let it get to her, but it does. But she can't let anyone else know that. Nico turns and faces away from her friends so they can’t tell how disappointed she is.

“It _is_ getting pretty late,” she yawns, stretching her arms theatrically. “We’ve got a long ride back. And Tsubasa’s probably been waiting for you all day…”

She waits for Maki to agree and start ushering them towards the exit. She’s already steeling herself for the inevitably uncomfortable atmosphere of the train ride home when a hand grabs her elbow.

“What are you talking about? You wanted to see the fireworks, right?”

Nico can’t believe her ears, but when she turns around, Maki’s staring at Nico so earnestly, her fingers gripping tightly against Nico’s skin.

Startled, Nico can only splutter. In her peripheral vision, she can see Nozomi’s eyes widen as well. There’s a long moment where they just stand in the middle of the pathway and stare at each other, the other park guests stepping around them.

Maki lets go of Nico’s arm, almost as an afterthought. “We should hurry if we want to get a good spot for the show,” she pronounces, and a blush dusts her cheeks. It’s a relief to see that smile again. To see that excitable, energetic twinkle in her eye that Nico has grown quite fond of today, if only because it’s nice to know Maki isn’t just a boring, opera-loving mutant. “They’re going to start soon.”

Nico’s heart flutters. Her whole body feels light. She doesn’t even care that Nozomi’s going to get the wrong idea, because there’s no way she can stop the huge, dopey grin spreading across her face right now.

“Yeah. Okay.” Hopefully, she doesn’t sound as giddy and stupid as she feels. “Come on!” She charges ahead, because _of course_ she wants to see the fireworks.

They find a great spot, sitting right next to the paddle boats area. The lights from the surrounding rides reflect prettily off the rippling water. They all crane their necks up in anticipation, and Maki even shows off a little by pointing out some constellations.

And when the loud explosion of sound and light blazes across the sky, it’s enough to make them all gasp in wonder. It’s a beautiful burst of colors that melts into the night and leaves afterimages sparking in Nico’s eyes. She loses herself in them, her heartbeat mingling with the crackle and deep booms echoing throughout the park.

At one point, she looks to her left. Nozomi and Eli are leaning into each other, sharing a soft, secret moment. Warmth swells in her chest to see her friends so happy, so at peace. They really _are_ made for each other.

She steals a glance to her other side, where Maki is sitting, hugging her knees to her chest and gazing upwards. She’s totally preoccupied with the fireworks, and Nico takes the opportunity to observe her enamored expression. The lights play over her skin, painting it in shades, casting it in shadow. Nico thinks back to how she’d thought Maki was a professional model when they first met. Anyone would’ve been fooled, with a face like that.

Maki shifts. They lock eyes, and for once, Nico feels no instinctive urge to look away. For some reason, it feels right, to be sharing this experience with Maki, both their mouths curved up into tiny smiles as fireworks continue to shoot into the air above their heads. Nico just wants to freeze this moment in time forever.

Of course, it has to end. The last round of fireworks is spectacular, a rapid succession of mascot characters and gigantic explosions of dazzling color and heat. The audience members around them chatter excitedly, and when the show ends, they begin to collect their things, shattering the spell and bringing Nico back to reality. Maki blinks and breaks off her stare first. She twirls at the ends of her hair, a nervous habit that Nico’s long used to seeing.

Nozomi arches her back, then stands up. “Ready to go?” she asks cheerfully as she helps Eli to her feet.

Nico stands too, and Maki follows soon after. They all take one last look upwards, watching the smoky aftermath of the fireworks fade away. When she peeks sideways at Maki, the other girl seems so relaxed, so contented. And right now, that’s all that Nico cares about.

“Let’s go,” she agrees.

It’s a perfect end to a perfect day.

And long after Nico’s dragged herself to bed, she can still feel herself smiling.

 

 

 

**ii.**

Maki's in a good mood lately.

She's been aware of it obviously, but it doesn't really register until she's sitting in the waiting area outside Tsubasa's office and she finds herself actually on the verge of humming. She clamps her mouth shut before she can do anything embarrassing - that nosy receptionist from before is seated at the front desk and she doesn't want her reporting any suspicious behavior to Tsubasa. Not that she has anything to hide, of course. She just doesn’t want the hassle of explaining herself.

But why is she in such a good mood, anyway? No particular reason. If she really thinks about it, there are multiple contributing factors. Like her research, which is going very well. Her two-year anniversary with Tsubasa’s coming up soon. Her favorite character in that medical drama survived a complex, only slightly exaggerated surgery. The weather’s nice today. Just _so_ many things to be happy about.

The entrance door swings open and a familiar, short figure walks into the room. Maki’s heart flips over in her chest and her lips tremble as she fights the automatic smile that threatens to spread across her face.

“You’re late,” she intones smugly, before Nico Yazawa can even approach the receptionist.

Nico freezes mid-stride and whirls around. She puts her hands on her hips, and Maki almost laughs at how offended her posture is. “No I’m not! I’m right on time!”

Maki makes a big show of glancing at the thin watch on her wrist. “Late. By two minutes.”

Nico huffs. She stomps over towards the chairs where Maki's sitting and drops down into the seat next to her. Maki angles her arm a little so that Nico can see for herself, tapping her finger against the time displayed on the small screen.

“Your watch is just fast,” Nico grumbles.

“Make that three minutes,” Maki corrects, and Nico’s grumpy expression is so funny that she can’t resist a grin.

“Oh whatever! Is Tsubasa in yet?” Nico kicks her legs, which aren’t quite long enough to touch the ground when she’s sitting down.

Maki shakes her head. “She had an interview with some magazine. Hopefully it didn't overrun.”

“That’s exciting!” Nico grins. “I guess soon it'll be you in the magazines instead!”

Maki shifts in her seat. Even now, she still can't quite comprehend that. “Well, at least we know I'll look good.”

For some reason, Nico finds that amusing. “You’re pretty confident, huh? Maybe you should take a lesson or two in modesty from Nico.”

“ _You_?” Maki snorts. “Last time you barely stopped bragging about how you were still adorable when you were hanging upside down.”

“That wasn't bragging, Maki. That was just stating facts.”

Nico's so smug that Maki can't wait to bring her back down to reality, but when she spots the receptionist she pauses. The smartly dressed woman isn't even _pretending_ to work. She's just staring at the two of them and her mouth hanging is open. There's clearly something fascinating about their conversation, though Maki can't imagine what could be so - _oh_.

 _Right_. The last time she saw the two of them was their disastrous first meeting. And now. Now things are different.

“Amazing!” Nico leans closer and tugs on a strand of her hair. “Your hair’s still sticking up a little from all those roller coasters, huh?”

“W-What?” Maki bats her hand away, smoothing down her hair on reflex.

Nico giggles and pokes out her tongue. “ _Kidding_. You look cute today. That's a pretty shirt. It's a good color on you.”

Maki feels heat rise to her cheeks as Nico's fingers skim briefly across the material of her new blouse. She'd spent a long time in front of the mirror picking out a nice but appropriate outfit this morning. Just because she always wants to look her best in public. Not because she wanted to impress anyone in particular. But... Nico noticed. And she thinks it looks nice. And that makes Maki pleased and uncomfortable and embarrassed, all at once.

“T-Thanks,” Maki stutters out. “Your dress is nice. I-I mean, you look like you might actually be out of high school now.”

For a brief moment, Maki swears she sees Nico blush. But she brushes it off and narrows her eyes so quickly that Maki's sure she imagined it.

“Don't be so rude. Nico's a super mature style icon! A trendsetter! I walked by the opera place the other day and saw three grandmas wearing overalls. All thanks to me.”

Despite her best efforts, Maki can’t hold back her laughter. “You did not.”

“It’s true!” Nico insists, but she doesn’t keep a straight face for long. They both make a cursory attempt to stifle their giggles, which absolutely does not succeed. Maki doesn’t care though, even if the receptionist is full-on gawking at them like they’re animals at the zoo.

Being around Nico is just like this. Normally, she’d be embarrassed, but Nico just has this way of making bystanders’ opinions less important, somehow. Probably because she’s so shameless herself. Maki's pretty sure she's never met anyone so casually self-assured before. Even Tsubasa has a less natural, more carefully polished air.

Maki frowns a little at the thought. She's been doing this a lot lately, comparing Tsubasa and Nico to each other. She catches herself doing it at the oddest moments. Like, when Tsubasa takes so long to respond to a message that she and Nico have gone through three wildly different topics by the time she finally replies. Or when a conversation with Tsubasa filters out into an awkward silence again and she can’t resist pulling out her phone to text Nico instead. When she updates Tsubasa on her research and she displays only polite interest, even though she clearly knows much more about the medical field than Nico, who bombarded her with a million questions and made both Eli and Nozomi text her congratulations.

It's the little details too. Nico's never late. Her friends are nicer and much less pretentious than Tsubasa's. She never has to check her schedule before agreeing to do something. She _listens_ to Maki. When she's not being all irritable, she smiles all the time. A real, genuine smile that’s so different from the ones Maki sometimes has to force when Tsubasa asks her how her day was.

Maki knows it’s unfair to Tsubasa to think this way, especially when their relationship with has improved so much in the past few weeks. At least, Maki _thinks_ it has. She’s been feeling a lot happier in general, which Tsubasa’s definitely noticed. Her girlfriend keeps commenting on how cheerful she looks lately, and how good her complexion is. Maki doesn’t have the heart to tell her that has more to do with finally following a few of the skincare tips Nico insisted on, and not because she’s been less stressed.

Anyway, the point is - she and Tsubasa are fine. They haven’t had any arguments for a long time, and Tsubasa’s made a real effort to be home more. Things are looking up, and even if Maki doesn’t feel particularly _excited_ when she’s around Tsubasa like she did when they were first dating, that’s normal, right? For that excitement to just fade away over time?

Tsubasa’s trying. And she’s trying. Which is why she’s perfectly content to wait in her girlfriend’s office to talk about the upcoming trip to Okinawa. Besides, at least Nico’s here to keep her company.

“So are you free again soon?” Nico bumps Maki’s shoulder with her own. “Me and Nozomi are totally planning for next time already.”

“Oh?” Maki sits up straighter and tries not to look too eager. Excitement flutters in her stomach at the phrase _next time._ “What do you have in mind?”

Nico makes a pensive noise. “We’re not sure yet. But I kinda wanna see Eli freak out again… I know!” Her eyes light up deviously. “What about skydiving?”

“W-What?” Maki recoils in horror. “You’re joking, right?”

Yes, she’d had way more fun than she ever expected at the amusement park, but that doesn’t mean she’s ready to just throw herself out of a plane. She’d like to make it out of her leisure activities alive, thank you very much. There's no way she's going to do it. She’ll write herself a medical note using terms Nico won't understand if she has to.

After a suspenseful moment, though, Nico snorts. “Chill, Maki! I can't afford it anyway.” She grins cheekily. “Your face is totally priceless right now, though. Keep it just like that for a sec…” Nico whips out her phone.

Maki blushes and dodges away from the camera. “Stop it!” she complains, but the laughter in her voice gives her away and Nico isn't deterred by her protests in the slightest. They scuffle for a bit, and it’s so unseemly and rowdy that they don’t even notice when the door swings open.

“Oh, you’re -” The clack of heels against the hard floor stops the both of them in their tracks, and they look up to see Tsubasa frowning at them. “You’re here,” she finishes in bewilderment as she eyes them.

Nico shoots out of her seat and snaps to attention like she’s some army recruit who’s just been caught goofing off by a superior officer. “T-Tsubasa!” she squeaks breathlessly.

Maki rises more slowly. “Hey,” she says, as casually as she can manage. It doesn’t dispel the awkwardness that suddenly pervades the room. Maki can already feel her humor souring.

“Hey.” Tsubasa moves closer to Maki and leans in for a quick peck on the cheek. Maki’s highly conscious of how carefully Nico’s watching them when Tsubasa finally steps back.

“Thanks for coming, Nico.” Just like that, Tsubasa enters business mode again. She gives Nico a gracious nod, which Nico eats up. She goes all wordless and wide-eyed, and honestly, it kind of irks Maki. Nico does this every time she gets within 10 feet of Tsubasa. She knows that Tsubasa is Nico’s idol or whatever, but doesn’t it get old at some point?

“You didn’t wait long, did you?” Tsubasa turns towards Maki. There’s a hint of chagrin in her voice - and something else. A test of some sort. Of what, Maki doesn’t know.

“No.” Maki shrugs. She tries for a reassuring smile and wonders vaguely if she succeeded. A quick glance at the front desk tells her that the receptionist is still observing them with great interest. “Shall we go to the office?”

Tsubasa inclines her head and they follow her down the hall. Nico, predictably, looks exactly as awed as she did the last time they were here. Her admiring expression does seem to falter for half a second when she spies the photo of Tsubasa and Maki together on the desk again. Maki finds herself wishing Tsubasa wouldn’t display it all the time. It’s embarrassing, now that she thinks about it.

“Eli couldn’t make it today - she’s been pretty busy lately,” Tsubasa explains as she sits down in her big leather chair. Like before, Maki and Nico take a seat across from her. “But I thought we could go over some details of the Okinawa trip anyway, even if it’s a bit far off.”

At that, Nico brightens. “Of course,” she exclaims eagerly. “And I just wanted to say, thank you _so_ much for letting me be part of this, I’m so excited to have this opportunity and I promise I’ll make Maki look even better for this commercial!”

Tsubasa chuckles indulgently. “I know you will. Besides,” she adds, glancing over at Maki, “I know Maki will appreciate the company too, righti?”

Maki tries not to read too much into the question, or the way Nico looks at her sharply as well. “I-I guess so.”

Tsubasa seems satisfied and turns back to Nico. “Like I said, we’re still a few weeks off, but it takes so long for legal to process liability and insurance paperwork, especially when we’re taking a plane and it’s an overnight trip…” She pats the hefty sheaf of papers stacked on her desk ruefully. “Do you mind terribly?”

Maki’s never seen someone look so excited to do paperwork before. Nico quickly gets to signing, while Tsubasa gives a quick rundown of each section. With not much else to do, Maki crosses her arms and settles back into her chair. She’s not sure why Tsubasa bothered inviting her too. In fact, she’s not even sure why they’re having this meeting at all. It’s not like Tsubasa doesn’t have assistants who can take care of all the explaining for her.

Tsubasa takes notice of her boredom and flashes a smile at her. “Sorry, babe. Won’t be much longer.”

Maki winces at the pet name. “Is there a reason you asked me to come too?”

“I have to have a reason to spend time with my girlfriend?” Tsubasa pouts playfully.  When Maki raises her eyebrows, she relents. “Actually, I wanted you both to see something.”

Maki straightens up curiously as Tsubasa scoots back a little to unlock some cabinet drawers beside her. Nico peeks up in the middle of writing her name for the tenth time too.

“Here we are.” Tsubasa pulls out what looks like a glossy, fancy magazine and lays it down on the desk. “Our designers finished it last week. We’re rather pleased with it.”

Nico gasps aloud.

It’s a makeup catalogue. _The_ makeup catalogue.

“It’s _incredible_!” gushes Nico as Maki scrutinizes the shiny, black pages. She didn’t recognize herself on the cover right away, but there she is, gazing out into the distance. The dark background highlights her pale skin and brings out the color in her cheeks. The title is in bold white letters above her head: _Forever_. And in smaller print: _Kira Cosmetics Summer Collection vol. 4_.

Tsubasa gestures grandly. “Go on, take a look!”

Maki leans forward as Nico turns the first page reverently, like she’s touching some holy makeup gospel. She’s got to admit, it looks impressively professional. The theme of the campaign comes across well, and if Maki says so herself, she looks _good._ But she didn’t realize she was going to feature so heavily. There are so many pages. So many photos.

Maki blushes as she spots an image herself from that one shoot where Eli and Nico kept annoying her by bellowing instructions about seduction and sex appeal. Her lips are all pouty and her eyes are heated and there's no denying Eli’s made her look hot, but it's so embarrassing. Maki didn't even know she could make an expression like that. She leans over and turns the page quickly.

“Hey! I was looking at that!” Nico protests. “I didn't get to read what my recommended shade would be!”

“Too late,” Maki says, feeling calmer as she settles her gaze on a more conservative ad. She glances up at Tsubasa. “Did you _have_ to use that one?”

“Of course.” Tsubasa reaches over and flips the page back. Maki groans as the image affronts her again. “You're _gorgeous_.”

“You do look really good,” Nico agrees, and for some unknown reason, her cheeks color. “I-I mean, it sells the product so well!”

Tsubasa doesn’t seem to notice her faltering. “I agree,” she says, casting an admiring eye over Maki’s pictures. “Let’s hope our customers do too.”

Nico opens her mouth and Maki expects another glowing affirmation of Tsubasa’s genius, but surprisingly, she just looks down at the brochure again. Maki furrows her brow at the uncharacteristic silence. Normally, Nico never shuts up.

The rare moment of quiet doesn’t last long. Nico sneaks a glance at Maki and she grins mischievously. “So my question is,” she says, leaning back against her chair, “if Maki’s embarrassed by the makeup catalogue, then how is she gonna handle the bikini shoot?”

“What, you don’t think I can pull it off?” Maki fires back immediately. Despite the sharpness of her voice, she feels a grin tugging at her own lips. “Because I definitely can.”

“Guess you’ll have to prove it,” Nico sing-songs.

“I’m sure Maki won't have any problems looking good in a bikini,” Tsubasa interrupts, and the way her gaze sweeps over Maki is not even slightly work appropriate. “And I'll personally be making sure she looks perfect in every shot.”

“Oh, cool!” Nico breaks eye contact with Maki and turns to face Tsubasa excitedly. “So you're gonna be there the whole time too?”

“I wouldn't miss it. Of course it's a business trip, but I’m hoping we'll get a little time to ourselves...” She catches Maki's eye and she winks. “That’s why we have our own room, right Maki?”

Maki shifts uncomfortably in her seat. She wishes Tsubasa wouldn't do that. She doesn't want Nico to think they're one of those gross couples who go overboard with the PDA and make everyone around them feel awkward. She doesn’t know how to respond so she just kind of shrugs it off, flipping the page once again. The next image brings an automatic smile to her lips.

“Oh. Remember this shoot? The one with the-”

“Wind maker!” Nico fills in. “That was so funny.”

Maki feels her face heat up. “I-It wasn’t that bad.”

Tsubasa leans forward. “Am I missing something?” she inquires politely, and before Maki can intervene, Nico angles herself eagerly towards her.

“Listen to this,” she starts gleefully. “Eli wanted to capture like the whole wind in the hair thing but we _totally_ underestimated how powerful the wind machine was. As soon as we turned it on, Maki’s hair extensions went flying off and got caught in the fan and-” She shakes with laughter, and even Maki can't hold back a quiet chuckle. “It was really funny!” Nico finishes finally, after she regains control of herself.

It takes Tsubasa a moment to respond. Maki spots the way her green eyes dart between the two of them, and something about it doesn’t feel right. Tsubasa recovers smoothly with a polite tinkle of laughter, but Maki knows her girlfriend’s real laugh well enough to recognize that this one sounds far from genuine.

“I wish I could’ve seen it. Although,” Tsubasa adds, with a soft frown, “I’m worried. Are we paying you enough? To stay behind and help so much, I mean?”

Nico shakes her head vigorously. “Oh, no, it’s my honor, really, I love hanging around on set and-”

This time, even Nico seems to notice the way Tsubasa's brow raises. She clamps her lips shut and blinks in confusion, her eyes wide with concern.

“Nico helped a lot,” Maki jumps in. She’s not sure why, but she feels the need to defend her. She doesn’t want Tsubasa to think they were just slacking off the whole time. “She gave me a lot of directions and stuff. But most of the time she had to run off to the mall right after, right?”

Nico latches on gratefully to the lifeline Maki’s thrown her. “Uh, right! I haven’t forgotten my day job.”

“Well, I’d never accuse you of that.” Tsubasa’s smile stretches wide, but it’s easy for Maki to recognise that she’s forcing it. “Thanks so much for being there, Nico.”

“N-No problem! I’m glad you think I did an okay job with the makeup and-”

“ _And_ for keeping Maki company this whole time.” Maki freezes as she hears her own name. Tsubasa keeps her voice light and pleasant, but there is a palpable temperature drop in the room. “It was quite the unexpected development but…” Tsubasa gestures between the two of them. “It’s just so _nice_ seeing you two so close.”

The smile on Nico’s face falters. It’s the first time Maki’s ever seen her look at Tsubasa with anything other than dazzling adoration.

“Uh…” Nico laughs nervously.  “Yeah, um. It’s always fun making new friends and stuff!”

“I’ll bet,” Tsubasa muses. “Maki’s barely off her phone lately. I’ve never seen her text so much.”

Maki’s whole body tenses. She wants to say something, but it feels like the words are stuck in her throat. She can’t do anything but stare.

“Oh, sorry!” Nico lowers her head. “I, uh, I text all my friends a lot and sometimes I get carried away and-”

“No, no, it’s great. I’ve introduced Maki to so many important people in the industry, but she never seems to like them. I think it’s wonderful she’s found a friend in someone so… _down to earth_. And I loved that photo you posted of the two of you on the ferris wheel. _So_ cute _._ ”

Nico’s mouth opens and closes again. She shifts in her seat - shifts further away from Maki - and that doesn’t feel right.

From the minute, they stepped into the office, Maki’s had a creeping feeling that something about this was off. This meeting didn’t have to happen. Normally, Tsubasa would just email Nico the contracts. She could’ve just shown Maki the catalogue at home.

Whatever’s going on, Maki doesn’t like it. If Tsubasa’s implying Nico’s acting less than professional by being friends with Maki, then that’s completely unfair. _Tsubasa’s_ the one who’d pushed Maki to be nice to her in the first place. And Nico’s been nothing but whole-hearted and enthusiastic about this whole project from day one. Maki isn’t sure what kind of game her girlfriend is trying to play, she resolves to put it to an end before it gets any more dangerous.

“A-Are we done here?” she blurts out. She winces at the way Tsubasa looks at her. “I’m hungry. I wanna go for lunch.”

Tsubasa turns to Nico, reverting back to her business-like air once more. “Did you sign everything?”

“Y-Yep.” Nico seems visibly shaken, but she pulls herself together to reply. “And, uh, actually I need to get ready for work too, so…”

“Of course.” Tsubasa flashes her teeth in an almost friendly manner. “You can find your own way out, right?”

Nico nods and springs to her feet. “Thanks for inviting me down here. I promise I’ll work extra hard next time!”

“See you later,” Maki says. Nico meets her eyes briefly, then looks away. Something about it unsettles Maki. She almost looks guilty.  

“Yeah, see ya!” She walks towards the door, then spins back around to bow in Tsubasa’s direction. “Thanks again for this opportunity.”

Her hurried footsteps echo along the corridor. After the sound has faded out to silence, Tsubasa sighs. “You know, sometimes I wonder if I should’ve hired a professional...”

“ _What_?” The remark is so unexpected that Maki can’t hold back the outrage in her tone. “Aren’t you always saying what a great job she’s doing?”

“Don’t get me wrong, she’s a sweet girl. And she’s very talented. I just wish she’d be a little more…”

Maki frowns. “More what?”

“It just feels like a fan club meeting sometimes.” Tsubasa examines her nails. “I wish she’d relax a little more around me.”

Maki’s stunned. For a full thirty seconds, she can’t even formulate a coherent thought; she just stares dumbly at her girlfriend, who gazes back calmly in return. When she finally collects herself, she has to clench her fists under the desk to keep her voice from trembling.

“I don’t think that’s fair. You know how much she admires you.”

Tsubasa tilts her head quizzically. “Well yes… and I’m grateful, of course. But even you said it before - isn’t it a little creepy?”

Maki thinks back and she flushes. She hates it when Tsubasa uses her own words against her.

“That was _different,”_ she protests. Considering Nico was railing off Tsubasa facts and running around collecting autographs back then, it’s only natural that Maki wrongly came to that conclusion. “Besides, I didn’t know her then.”

“And you do now?”

Tsubasa shapes the question so carefully that Maki doesn’t answer immediately. She has the distinct impression that there’s something more that Tsubasa’s searching for, something that she can’t quite grasp.

“We’re friends,” Maki says finally. “And _you’re_ the one who wanted me to get along with her. Remember?”

It comes out a little harsher than she intended, and she doesn’t miss the way Tsubasa’s face falls. There’s no reason she should be so guarded, so defensive with her girlfriend. Seeking to soften the blow, she adds quickly, “I just mean - I’m glad I took your advice. You were right. I was being too judgemental.”

Tsubasa lets out a tinkling laugh that doesn’t exactly sound humorous. “Maybe _you_ were right, though. She’s not exactly suited for the business world.”

The anger that flares up in Maki’s chest is sudden and hot.

“Stop that.” She hardly registers how Tsubasa’s eyes widen in shock. “Nico works harder than anyone else on the team. And she does it for you. Did you even think about how she’s been working part-time at the mall all this time just because she loves your products so much?”

In the ringing silence that follows, Maki realizes just how much she’s raised her voice. She bites her lip and drops her gaze down to her hands, clasped tightly in her lap. She hadn’t meant to make a scene. She just couldn’t stand how Tsubasa was treating Nico.

“You’re right.”

Maki glances up in surprise, just in time to catch Tsubasa frowning apologetically, her cheeks flushed with embarrassment.

“I shouldn’t have said that. Nico’s great. I guess I just-” She hesitates, then shakes her head. “I don’t know what came over me.”

Maki has the distinct impression that Tsubasa had been about to say something else, but she decides not to pry. She still feels pretty pissed off, but she doesn’t want to start some exhausting fight. She just wants to move on from this subject. She wants to go for lunch and talk about dull, predictable things like groceries and the weather.

“It’s fine,” Maki says, with a smile she hopes will smooth things over. “And the pictures turned out good, right?”

Tsubasa smiles at that, with a little more of her usual composure. “They really did.” They both gaze distantly at the catalogue. Tsubasa seems lost in thought, and Maki can only hope that her words were enough to placate her; Tsubasa’s always been tough to read. For a few beats, all that can be heard is the ticking of the clock.

“Well, let’s get lunch,” Tsubasa announces abruptly, breaking the silence. Maki can see that whatever she was thinking has been tucked neatly away in the back of her mind. Tsubasa’s always been good at compartmentalizing. “Let me just run down to the restroom and then we can go?”

Still unsettled, Maki only nods. Tsubasa breezes out the door, leaving Maki behind in the empty office. She sighs and slumps down in her chair. Has interacting with Tsubasa _always_ been this exhausting?

Her eyes lands on the makeup catalogue once more. It’s still strange, knowing that her face could be in a bunch of strangers’ homes or displayed in malls all over the country in just a couple months. Even more uncomfortable is the title that burns like a beacon across the cover.

 _Forever_. Absently, she traces the letters with one finger. There’s so much weight behind such a simple word. That had occurred to her before, too, back when Tsubasa first told her about the campaign. But seeing it before her now, emblazoned proudly on the brochure for everyone to gawk at, makes it seem so _real_. And for some unfathomable reason, that scares her, more than anything else.

She wonders why Tsubasa even asked her for help. What Tsubasa hopes to gain from it.

For the first time in awhile, she wonders why she agreed to model at all.

“Ready to go?” Tsubasa pops her head into the office, startling Maki out of her reverie.

Maki nods as she pulls her hand away from the catalogue hastily and stands up. Tsubasa smiles at her lovingly as they both step out of the room together, and Maki tries to remind herself how good this whole project is for them. How it’s supposed to deepen their relationship and make everything okay again. She should be grateful for it.

But as they walk out, she can’t help but look back over her shoulder again at the catalogue, at her own face looking so unfamiliar beneath the bold, bright letters of the title. She can’t shake the unease that settles deep in her bones as Tsubasa takes her elbow.

Forever is a long time.


	6. Epiphany

**i.**

“How’s Maki?”

Nozomi catches Nico off-guard while she’s tidying up the eyeshadow display. It's just two little words, but Nico feels a strange sensation stir in her chest anyway.

“Maki?” Nico flutters her lashes innocently as she turns around. “She's fine, I think? Why don't you ask her yourself?”

Nozomi tilts her head, but Nico isn't going to fall into her trap this time. She whirls pointedly, going back to organizing the brushes, because she's an amazingly dedicated worker who has no time to spare for idle gossip.

“I just thought you'd know,” Nozomi says, “since you're so _close_ and all.”

Nico rolls her eyes. Why is everyone so eager to point out how close her and Maki are lately? There’s nothing weird about the way things are between them. It’s perfectly normal. Or, you know, as normal as any friendship that started with both people hating each other can be.

She presses her lips together, willing herself not to take the bait. She’s too engrossed in her very important work to reply. She has no opinions on anything other than blending brushes. She's calm and relaxed. She has absolutely nothing to say on the matter.

“Have you told her you like her yet?”

Nico slaps her palm down on the glass counter and whips her head around.

“I don’t. _Like her_ ,” she hisses with as much outrage as she can muster.

“Well of course you do.” Nozomi’s smile is wide and sly. “She’s your _friend,_ isn’t she?”

Nico’s only resists throwing an entire pot of makeup brushes in Nozomi’s direction because she knows she’d have to clean them up after. Frustration doesn’t even cover what she’s feeling right now. Nico’s had a flourishing social circle for years now and no one has ever got on her case about anyone else. So why is everyone so obsessed with Maki? She's tried to shrug off these overt insinuations to no avail, but Nozomi's never been one to let things go. At this point, Nico's only option is to put her foot down once and for all.

She puts her hands on her hips and faces Nozomi directly.

“Listen. There's nothing going on between us. You've got it all wrong and honestly? I'm starting to get embarrassed for you.”

“I'm just trying to-”

“I know,” Nico cuts in firmly. “But you need to stop. _Now_.”

“Alright.” Nozomi wavers, then smiles sheepishly. “But will you answer me one tiny little question?”

Nico sighs. “What?”

“If there's nothing going on between you two,” Nozomi says deliberately, her eyes focusing on something in the distance, “then... what’s Maki doing here?”

Nico’s heart leaps in her chest for half a second, before she realizes that Nozomi’s just trying to scare her. She beats down the urge to check where Nozomi’s looking. “Ha ha,” she intones sardonically. “Nice try.”

Someone clears their throat behind her.

Nico can literally feel the blood draining from her cheeks as slowly turns her head. A shock of red is the first thing she catches sight of.

Maki’s standing in front of the makeup counter, twirling at the ends of her hair nervously. She seems like she might bolt any second. Nico kind of wishes she would, because maybe then that weird flip-flopping feeling in her stomach would go away too.

“M-Maki!” she squeaks, her voice cracking. She spins around and backs up, nearly knocking over one of their stools in the process.

Nozomi greets her in a much more composed manner. “Long time no see, Maki. To what do we the pleasure?”

Maki shifts uncomfortably. Her eyes dart toward Nico. “I was in the area. Just, uh, doing some shopping. And I thought I’d drop by.”

“How nice.” Nozomi’s grin could rival the Cheshire Cat’s. She scans the store and spots a couple of women looking over the promotional discounts on the other side. “Well, those two look like they need help. Nico, why don’t you see if Maki needs anything?” She raises her voice. “Ladies, let me tell you about our current offers…” And before Nico can protest, she’s already striding off, leaving Nico and Maki standing awkwardly on opposite sides of the counter.

Nico forces herself to sound casual. She tries to ignore how sweaty her palms suddenly are.

“So, uh, did you want to get some makeup?”

“Oh.” Maki picks up a lipstick and examines it briefly, before putting it back in entirely the wrong place. “No. I, um. I wanted to ask you…”

Nico waits as Maki searches for the end of her sentence, fumbling with the strap on her purse. She tries to ignore the way her pulse excels to twice its regular speed at the sight of her familiar, pretty face.

“Ask me…?” Nico prompts. She tugs on the edge of her makeup stained shirt to straighten it up, wishing she was wearing something nicer than her uniform.

“Is today your half day at work?”

“Huh?” Nico blinks. It takes her a moment to process Maki’s question. “Oh, yeah it is! I get off in like,” she glances at the clock, “an hour? Why?”

“No reason,” Maki says, looking away quickly.

Nico bites her lip. It's rare that she finds herself so speechless, but she's not even sure where to start. Did Maki have another fight with Tsubasa? Or did she come to talk about something work related? And why did Nozomi have to go and be all preoccupied with customers? Why is she just leaving Nico to flounder and attempt to decode what the hell Maki's doing in this particular mall, when there are so many amazing places to shop on the other side of the city where she lives?

“Actually...” When Maki speaks again, it’s an unsure murmur. “There is a reason. I could kinda use your help.”

“Help?” Nico repeats, slowly. “With what?”

Maki glances over her shoulder nervously as two trendy young women step into the store. “Can you meet me out front when you're done? Uh, if you’re free, that is.”

“I mean…” Nico checks the time again. “It’s going to take awhile. Are you sure you wanna wait?”

Maki gives the smallest nod imaginable. “It’s fine. I’ll just… look around.” She waves her hand towards the vicinity of the rest of the mall.

“Alright… S-See you later then.”

“Yeah.”

Maki pivots before Nico has the chance to speak again. She shuffles away so fast she’s almost running. Nico watches stupidly as she leaves the store.

In her periphery, she sees Nozomi returning to the counter. She doesn’t wait for her to open her mouth, just holds up a hand.

“Don’t.”

Nozomi doesn’t giggle or tease her, like Nico expects. She just sighs and turns to organize some samples. “I hope you know what you’re doing, Nicocchi.”

Nico shakes her head as she puts away the lipstick Maki was examining.

 _Me too,_ she thinks. _Me too._

***

“So? What’s going on?” Nico doesn’t even bother to greet Maki when she walks out of the store and finds her loitering by the entrance. She just falls into step with her, and they both automatically start walking.

Maki takes a deep breath before she answers. “My two year anniversary with Tsubasa is coming up.”

Nico keeps her face carefully neutral at the revelation. Just because she’s been taken by surprise, of course. She forgot that they’d been dating for so long already.

“Congratulations! What are you two planning? Anything special?”

Maki jerks her shoulders impatiently. “Um, a dinner, I think. But that’s not important right now.” She grimaces. “I need… to get her a present. A good one.”

Nico stops in the middle of the mall. Something clicks in her head and she can’t resist rubbing her hands together gleefully. _Now_ she knows why Maki’s here today.

“Oh, I get it,” she gloats, and she points in triumph at Maki. “You want Nico-Nii’s help finding a gift. Because you suck at gift-giving.”

Maki stiffens immediately. “T-That’s not true!”

Nico wags her finger. “Now, now Maki, it’s not good to lie.” She puffs out her chest and pounds it. “Nico would be _thrilled_ to help. I _am_ the foremost expert on all things Tsubasa Kira, after all!”

“Oh yeah?” Maki raises a skeptical eyebrow. “Says who?”

Nico begins rattling off all the Tsubasa facts she knows. “Tsubasa’s favorite color is silver. She started modeling at the age of 10. When she was younger, her family had a golden retriever whose name was-”

“Okay, okay, I get it!” Maki cuts her off quickly. She doesn’t look nearly as impressed as Nico thinks she should be. “So - you’ll help?”

Nico pretends to ponder, but she can’t keep up the facade for long. She breaks out into a grin. “Of _course_. I know this mall like the back of my hand. Come on!”

She grabs Maki’s elbow, pulling her along. Nozomi was worrying about nothing after all. Helping Maki find an anniversary present for her brilliant girlfriend? What could be less dangerous? She’s already getting excited, just thinking about all the possibilities.

This is going to be great.

***

“This is hopeless,” Maki sighs from behind Nico.

“No! Don't give up yet!” Nico says, her gaze skimming past a selection of unsuitable knitwear. “We'll find something!”

They’ve gone through five different stores already, and passed by a dozen more. Coming up with an appropriate present is proving to be more of a challenge than Nico expected. Tsubasa’s super classy, and she deserves a classy gift - that much is simple. But it can’t just be any fancy object, not when it’s for celebrating an anniversary. It has to be _meaningful_. It has to be _special_.

And that’s the part that’s giving them trouble.

“What about...” Maki hums thoughtfully. “Hmm. What do you think of these?”

When Nico turns around, Maki's holding a pair of socks. They're pink with the words _kiss me_ printed around the top in bold black writing and Nico's never seen anything more terrible in her whole life. Maki examines them intently, a small frown of consideration on her lips. There's no trace of humor in her expression. She's serious. She's dead serious.

And that's when Nico knows she’s lost it.

“Maki,” Nico says, “put the socks down.”

“No,” Maki pouts and clutches them to her chest. “They're all I've got!”

“I am _not_ letting you buy those for Tsubasa,” Nico says, holding out her hand. “Give them to me.”

Maki grumbles as she hands them over, but Nico’s just saving her from herself. She feels so much better when those monstrosities are back where they belong. Maki clearly needs more help than she thought. Nico links her arm through Maki's and whisks her out of the store before she can find something even worse.

“You need to relax,” Nico says. “You’re totally overthinking this _._ ”

“How can I relax?” Maki snaps. “I have nothing! No ideas. I don't even know what my own girlfriend _likes._ ”

Maki looks so lost and so stressed that Nico guides her gently out of the way of the stream of busy shoppers and nudges her down onto an empty bench.

“Look,” Nico says, sitting down beside her. “It's not about _what_ you buy. It's about what it _means._ Like… okay! What's your favourite memory of Tsubasa? You met at a fancy event or something, right?”

“Right…” Maki sounds equally dubious and dejected. She leans forward and rests her chin in one hand as she dredges up the memory. “My parents had some business party and invited all the big names that year. Tsubasa was one of them. I noticed her pretty quickly.”

“Oh?” Nico says, perking up. She loves romantic stories like this.

“Yeah. Mostly because she was one of the few people in the room who wasn’t a middle aged man.”

Nico giggles. “So… what? She waltzed in and swept you off your feet?”

Maki makes a face. “Not exactly. At first, I was kinda…” Nico feels herself smiling. She can totally imagine _exactly_ what Tsubasa had to go through, trying to win over someone like Maki. “I thought she was probably just being nice to try and make a business deal with my parents or something.”

“Oh my God. You were totally rude to her!”

Maki flushes easily. “No I wasn’t! I was just…” She spots Nico’s eager expression and sighs. “You’re not going to let this go until I tell you everything, huh?”

“Aw, you know me so well now!” Nico sits back in her seat and makes herself more comfortable. “Tell me every detail.”

Maki shakes her head in exasperation, but she settles into the story anyway. “So the party had these stupid swans carved out of ice. Like, these huge, ugly sculptures everywhere, and Tsubasa came up behind me and commented on how pretty they were and I told her that, well... that they were tasteless and out of season. I mean, it _was_ the middle of April!” she adds, when Nico smirks.

“Anyway, she looked pretty surprised at first. But then she laughed and she agreed with me. A-And when she smiled, I…”

“That's when you knew?” Nico asks, excitedly.

“Do you want me to tell you or not?” Maki huffs. When Nico presses a finger to her lips, she continues. “She offered to get me a drink. I kinda resigned myself to talking to her because at least she was around my age and, well… she wasn’t very subtle about flirting. And I guess we hit it off. We ended up outside in the hotel garden by this really pretty fountain and-” The tips of Maki’s ears go red as she pauses.

Nico tries to picture it - a starry sky, a secluded garden, the sound of rushing water. Two beautiful girls sharing smiles in the moonlight. It sounds like a scene from a movie. Like the perfect place for love to bloom.

A dull ache forms in Nico’s chest as she thinks about the two of them falling in love for the first time, but only because it makes her feel so lonely. Why does this kind of thing never happen to her? When's a hot rich girl going to come along and sweep _Nico_ off her feet?

But when Nico sees the soft flush of Maki’s cheeks, she knows this isn’t about her. This is about finding the perfect present for Tsubasa. It’s about showing her how much Maki cares.  

Nico knows what she has to do. It's a challenge, sure, but if she can just get Maki to keep opening up like this, she's confident they can come up with something. After all, Nico _is_ the biggest Tsubasa fan in the known universe.

“That's a nice story,” Nico says.

Maki smiles. “It was a nice night.”

“So now you've just gotta keep all that stuff in mind. Keep channeling that good energy and I'm sure you’ll find something!”

“Yeah,” Maki agrees, though she still looks a little uncertain. “I mean, probably…”

“No!” Nico points sternly. “Stop doubting yourself. No more freaking out on me. You can totally do this!”

“Okay,” Maki nods. “B-But you're gonna stay, right? You don't have to go yet?”

A sly smile crosses Nico’s face. “I'll stay if you admit that you'd be totally lost without the help of the adorable Nico-Nii!”

To Nico's surprise, Maki doesn't even try to protest. “I definitely would be. So please. Help me.”

There's something weird about seeing Maki ask for something so honestly. She looks so cute and earnest that Nico can't even pretend she's going to say no. She stands up and extends her hand towards Maki.

“I suppose I can stay a little longer. But we'd better get going. Gotta get this done before the mall closes, right?”

Maki groans, but a look of determination crosses her face as she takes Nico's hand and allows herself to be tugged to her feet. “Let’s do this.”

Shopping around is easier now that they actually have a general mood in mind. Maki's more focused now. At least, she’s not genuinely considering ugly socks or generic gift baskets anymore. They don’t spend as much time lingering over scented candles or expensive wine as they did earlier either - though they don’t pass up the free samples when they pass by a fancy sweets store.

“So she really hired a boat for your second date?” Nico asks around a mouthful of chocolate and caramel.

“It was romantic,” Maki grumbles defensively. “Plenty of people hire boats.”

“Oh, buy her this then,” Nico says, pointing at an _I heart my yacht_ mug. “You'd look great in this hat that comes with it!”

“It was one time,” Maki insists. “Besides… I think these are more Tsubasa's style.”

She points at a ridiculous “Mr. and Mrs.” paired mug set, and Nico gapes at her in outright horror. She _can’t_ be serious. These are even worse than the socks. You’d have to be completely insane to even consider-

It's only when Maki’s mouth twitches that Nico realizes she’s joking. And honestly, she isn't expecting that. Nico picks the mugs up and pretends to examine them carefully, playing along.

“Maki, you genius!” She swoons in mock adoration. “Stop the search. Let's go buy them right now.”

“Wait.” Maki stops Nico with a firm hand on her arm. “I bet I can find something worse.”

Mystified, Nico watches as Maki zips off around the corner, but when she spots her shuffling back carrying a large, hot pink cushion in the shape of a heart, she puts two and two together. Quickly, Nico turns around to grab the ugliest apron she can find off a nearby shelf and holds it up proudly when Maki approaches.

They get a little carried away after that. Somewhere between garishly decorated picture frames no one in their right mind would purchase and hideously patterned “his and hers” blankets, they forget that they’re actually supposed to be looking at _good_ gifts. It becomes a competition to find the absolute worst objects in the mall. Nico can barely hold back her laughter as they hurry through the aisles pointing out the most tacky items they can find with entirely serious expressions.

It’s really, really fun. And that surprises Nico. Even now, she still finds herself taken aback by how natural spending time with Maki feels. It makes total sense that they had a good time at the amusement park (because who wouldn't, you know?) but this is just a standard, everyday shopping trip. Nico doesn't really understand why she feels so elated right now. Why she feels so thrilled when she pops around the corner wearing a fake plastic moustache and Maki cracks up laughing.

Honestly, it scares her a little. Because as crazy as it sounds, she kind of feels like she could go _anywhere_ with Maki and still have a really great time. And that's just plain weird, isn't it? Friendship sure is strange sometimes.

Nico's still giggling to herself about the moustache when she stumbles upon a tiny Christmas section. She reaches towards the tacky reindeer antlers that she can’t imagine anyone is buying in May and then pauses as something else catches her eye.

Instantly, she remembers their original mission, the whole reason they’re still loitering around the mall in the first place.

She takes a breath. She might’ve just found the perfect fit.

“Hey Maki!” Nico calls out. She twists around, looking to see where her shopping companion went.

Maki rounds the corner, hugging the ugliest stuffed animal the world has ever seen close to her chest. It's big and lumpy with a sad, droopy face and Nico's pretty sure any child who received it as a gift would have nightmares for months. She's not even sure what it’s meant to be. Nico's not a zoologist or anything, but she's pretty sure she's never seen any animal look like that before.

Maki stares with smug expectation, waiting for Nico to react to what surely must be the worst thing they've seen all day. But Nico can't let herself get distracted. She's so excited by her discovery, she can barely form a coherent sentence.

“Maki! Swans!”

Maki glances down at the vague representation of a four-legged beast in her arms and shakes her head, misunderstanding Nico’s exclamation. “I know it’s pretty mutated, but it’s _definitely_ not a swan. I was thinking more of a kangaroo-elephant hybrid?”

“No, no, listen! I think I've found it!”

Maki’s blank expression shows that she has no idea what Nico’s referring to. Nico sighs impatiently.

“Think about it. What was the first thing you and Tsubasa ever talked about?”

Maki frowns. “Those... ugly ice sculptures?”

“Okay, so look up there! See it?” She points emphatically at the shelf above her head.

Maki scans the line of tacky snow globes that are almost all Christmas-themed. Then she pauses. She doesn't take her eyes off the shelf as she hands Nico the ugly stuffed animal, before reaching up and pulling one of them down. It’s slightly larger than her hand. A pair of deceptively elegant swans sit inside the glass, their long necks collectively curved into the shape of a soft, subtle heart. Nico hears Maki take an audible breath as she shakes it and unleashes a flurry of fake snow.

“This is so pretty,” Maki murmurs as she traces the swirling patterns carved into the surface of the glass. “Do you think-”

Nico nods eagerly. “I think it's _perfect._ ”

When Maki looks up again, her eyes are bright and shining. Still clutching the snow globe tightly, she steps forward and loops her arms around Nico's shoulders and it’s so warm and unexpected and so totally unlike her that Nico just _freezes_. Her arms are trapped between them and her hands are still gripping at the lumpy stuffed animal, and she's so glad. She's so glad that this stupid unidentifiable thing is in the way so Maki can't feel how crazy hard her heart is pounding.

When Maki pulls back from the hug, her cheeks are tinged pink with embarrassment. “Sorry,” she says, casting her gaze downward sheepishly. “I'm just really happy. I can't believe we found something!”

“Y-Yeah!” Nico tries to force herself to breathe normally, but it's hard when her skin is still tingling from the heat of Maki's touch. They both take an awkward step back, and Maki holds out the snow globe again, examining it.

“This is so good. Tsubasa's going to love this.”

Right. Of course. _Tsubasa._ The whole point of this shopping trip. Nico lets out a nervous bark of laughter and just nods in agreement. Maki gives her a strange look.

“You should go pay for that,” Nico suggests hurriedly. “I’ll go… I’ll go put this thing back.” She squeezes the ugly stuffed animal she’s still carrying. Maki lingers a moment longer, but she eventually excuses herself and makes her way towards the cash register. Nico watches as she goes.

Nico knows that she should be happy. She's had a fun afternoon, and it’s been really nice to see Maki go all-out for something for once. They found the perfect gift, and Maki and Tsubasa’s anniversary is saved. All in all, it's been a complete success.

So why does she feel so empty right now? Why does she feel like the world is suddenly closing in on her? What’s with this indescribable pain rippling through her chest as she sees Maki hand the snow globe over to the cashier with an air of satisfaction?

She tries to picture Maki giving the gift to Tsubasa. Maybe, like before, it’ll be over a fancy dinner worth more than a quarter of Nico’s monthly rent. They’ll probably giggle at the romantic memory of their first meeting, gazing sweetly into each other’s eyes. She imagines Tsubasa’s sharp, perfect face lit by candlelight, breaking into a smile as she toasts to a blushing Maki.

They’re perfect for each other. Nico’s known that from the start. She’s lucky to have even a small glimpse into their rich, gleaming world. She's lucky to be working for a creative genius like Tsubasa - lucky to have met someone as snobby, awful, adorable, smart, and stubborn as Maki. She’s probably the luckiest person alive, aside from Tsubasa and Maki themselves.

So why does it _hurt_ so much to think about?

Nico drags her feet along the store floor to the toy section and drops the ugly stuffed animal back down next to the pretty teddy bears with perfect shiny ribbons. She looks into its big, googly eyes and she feels a sense of solidarity. She feels like it _understands_ her. Nico shakes her head and sighs. She's losing her mind. That's the only explanation. She's really, truly losing it.

“If you're gonna miss it that much, why don't you just buy it?”

Nico jumps. She plasters a smile on her face before she turns around. “Oh, Maki! You’re all done?”

Maki gestures at the toy jokingly. “Sure you wanna leave it behind? I’ll get it for you if you want.”

“D-Don’t be silly! Let’s go.”

Nico nudges at Maki’s arm - the same way she has been doing all day - and then she catches herself. She tugs her hand back as though it's been scalded. Tactile gestures totally come naturally for a friendly people person like Nico, but she shouldn’t be so touchy-feely. Maki has a girlfriend. A wonderful, talented, perfect girlfriend. And Nico would happily avoid touching Maki forever if it meant she never had to feel this twisting ache in her stomach ever again.

Maki doesn’t seem to notice the way Nico hesitates. They leave the store together, and Maki has a literal spring in her step as they make their way through the busy crowds of shoppers. Nico only wishes she could feel the same.

“There’s still some time before the mall closes,” Maki comments, checking her watch. “Wanna get dinner? My treat. Since you helped me so much today.”

Nico almost says yes. It’s already on the tip of her tongue before she stiffens and catches herself.

“Actually.” She takes a deep breath. “Uh, actually, I need to get home. Soon. I’ve got… leftovers?” The excuse falls flat even as she voices it.

Maki has no right to look as taken aback as she does. Nico tries not to let the guilt creep up on her when she sees the other girl’s eyes widen in surprise - and a little hurt.

Maki doesn’t question her, though. She just looks down at her feet. “Oh. Okay. Maybe next time then.”

Nico only nods, because she doesn’t trust herself to say anything else. If she opens her mouth, she might just take up Maki on her offer after all. And that would be dangerous for a lot of reasons that Nico can’t bear to think about right now.

They don’t exchange many more words after that. It’s a sharp contrast to when they were running around shoving bizarrely shaped paperweights and excessively gaudy jewelry under each other’s noses, trying to make the other person laugh. It takes an eternity to finally reach one of the mall entrances. By the time they make it there, it's already dark outside. Nico hadn’t realized how late it had gotten while they were fooling around.

“Right,” Nico says, as they step out through the automatic doors into the warm spring air. “I guess I'm going that way.”

“And I'm going that way,” Maki says, pointing in the opposite direction.

Despite their plainly stated intentions of leaving, their feet stay rooted to the floor. Nico looks down at her shoes, but she can feel Maki's impatient gaze. She knows she wants to say something, but Nico speaks up before she gets the chance.

“Right,” Nico says again. “I hope you guys have a great anniversary-”

“B-Before you go!” Maki interjects, cutting Nico off. She clutches the strap on her purse determinedly.  “I just wanted to say thank you. I-I couldn't have done this without you.”

Nico tries to suppress the swell of happiness that rises in her chest.

“You're a good friend, Nico.”

 _Friend_. The word brings her back to her reality, grounds her. That’s all she is to Maki. And it’s a good thing! That’s all she even really wants. She should be overjoyed to hear something so nice from someone like Maki. But it takes a little more effort than usual for Nico to fix her smile into place.

“Of course I am! Nico’s the best friend you’ll ever have!”

Maki chuckles at the boast, her whole face softening, and it really isn’t fair. She’s so pretty. How does anyone stand a chance when she looks like _that_?

“Seriously.” Maki indicates towards the shopping bag with the snow globe. “I owe you one.”

“Don't worry! When I'm shopping for my hot future girlfriend, you'll be the first person I call.”

Nico must be imagining the shadow that flicks over Maki’s face, because in the next moment she’s grinning roguishly. “I hope so. I have some _excellent_ suggestions.”

Nico giggles. She’s a mess of trembling nerves and confusing warm feelings right now, but she can't deny that today was a whole lot of fun. But she needs to get going soon. If she lingers here for much longer, her heart might actually burst out of her chest.

“Anyway. I’d better go. I have to, uh, catch the train.” Nico doesn't mention that it comes every five minutes, actually. Maki doesn't need to know that.

“Yeah.” Maki nods. “I'll text you. To let you know what Tsubasa thinks of her present, I mean.”

Nico bites her lip. Why is Maki being so sweet and sincere today, of all days? She needs to put an end to this. Before things get any more confusing, before Nico says something she’ll _really_ regret.

“S-Sure. Say hi to her for me.” Maki continues to just stand there, as if waiting for her to say more, or hug her, or _something_ , but all Nico can think about is getting out of here. She's lost every single one of her world class social skills at this point. She doesn't understand what they did to deserve such an uncomfortable finish to their nice afternoon, but she knows for certain that it's all her fault.

Maki clears her throat. “Well. I'll let you get home. Don’t miss the train.”

“Yeah.” Nico laughs nervously. “Wouldn't want to get home late!”

Maki nods and says one final goodbye before she turns and walks away. Nico remains frozen in place, watching her delicate strides and the soft curls of her hair blowing gently in the breeze.  Her mouth is dry and she feels all gross and nauseous, but she knows this is probably just a one off. Just a simple side effect of spending all afternoon with a pretty girl. Nico’s sure that next time she sees Maki, everything will be back to normal.

Then Maki stops and glances back. She looks over her shoulder and she meets Nico’s eyes and smiles shyly and she’s so perfect and so beautiful that Nico’s heart almost stops. Maki turns quickly back around and starts walking again, at a much swifter pace than before. It’s such a simple, meaningless gesture, but Nico can barely catch her breath. She watches Maki disappear into the crowd and she steadies herself on the wall beside her as the nagging sense of unease she's been feeling all day crushes down on her so hard that she can barely stand up straight.

It’s been obvious from the start, what’s going on, only she’s been so purposely blind to it that she never even saw it coming.

“Shit,” she mutters under her breath as she turns and heads for the subway.

Nozomi was right.

And Nico has no idea what to do about it.

 

 

 

**ii.**

The news comes when Maki’s in the lab, gazing into a microscope at some promising samples. She’s so focused on the specimens that she nearly falls off her stool when Hanayo bursts through the double doors with a loud crash.

“It’s terrible!” she shouts, shaking her head so vigorously that her red glasses almost come flying off. She waves a piece of paper around as she repeats the exclamation. “Terrible!”

Maki looks around in alarm, half-expecting to see the lab equipment burst into flames. “What is it? What happened?” On the other side of the room, Rin also shoots out of her seat like an agitated cat.

Hanayo’s so worked up that it takes her several tries to string a coherent sentence together. “The drug trial! It’s been approved!”

There’s a long pause as the words sink in. Finally, Rin cocks her head.

“Isn’t… that a good thing?”

Hanayo blinks rapidly as if she doesn’t understand the question, but after a second, she nods. “Yes! It’s amazing! We can start at the beginning of next month!”

Maki lets out the breath she was holding in a relieved sigh. “God, you scared me. I thought something bad happened.”

“O-Oh!” Hanayo at least has the decency to look guilty as she hands over the paper she’s holding. “Sorry. I got excited…”

Maki flashes a smile to show she’s not angry, then skims the document. It’s an official email from one of their sponsors, and right away Maki can tell their lab results were received positively. In fact, it’s even better than she’d hoped - usually, it takes twice as long to get permission for clinical trials.

“Ooh, Maki’s happy!” Rin comments. When Maki looks up at her, she’s surprised to find herself grinning hugely. It’s a bit embarrassing, but she doesn’t hold back. It’s not every day she feels like her work is making a true difference in the world.

“This is really, really great news.” She holds up the paper for her friends to see and they quickly crowd her on either side. Pride swells in her heart as she glances at them fondly. They’ve been through so much together, and even with Rin’s carelessness and Hanayo’s nerves, she couldn’t ask for better research partners.

“Hug time!” shouts Rin, and before Maki can move, she loops her arms around Maki’s neck and pulls her in, reaching for Hanayo too. They all stumble into the nearby counter and Maki has to twist her arm at a weird angle to prevent the print-out from getting crumpled, but the messy embrace is so warm and loving that she can’t help but laugh.

“Alright, enough,” she finally says, after the hug has dragged on for more than half a minute. She shakes herself free of Rin’s grasp with considerable difficulty. Rin, for her part, clings onto Hanayo tenaciously, peppering her face with light kisses. Maki rolls her eyes. “Come on, what did I say about PDA in the lab?”

“R-Rin!” Hanayo pushes her away, blushing. She winces apologetically in Maki’s direction, but there’s no disguising the joy in her eyes. And Maki can admit that she loves seeing her friends so happy and in love.

“Take the rest of the day off,” she announces, on impulse. That gets Rin’s attention. She pauses her overt display of affection and her eyes widen.

“Really?”

Maki inclines her head. “Yeah. You’ve earned it. We’re just about done here, anyway.”

“Hurray!” Rin takes Hanayo’s hands and begins jumping up and down. “We should do something! Let’s celebrate!”

Hanayo gets caught up in her enthusiasm. “Celebratory snacks?” she asks hopefully, and her eyes are practically shining with excitement.

“Of course! Let’s go buy some.” Rin links her arm through Hanayo’s and tugs her towards the door. “You should come over and share with us, Maki! Tsubasa won’t be home until later, right?”

Maki considers it, but she spies how the two of them lace their fingers together, and that makes her hesitate. As much as she’d love to hang around with her best friends, they deserve some time alone, especially since they’ve been staying late hours at the lab for the past week. Maki stands up straighter and shakes her head.

“I’m kinda tired. I think I’ll just finish up here and head back too.” When Rin gives her a doubtful look, she stretches theatrically and rolls her shoulders. “I haven’t had a bubble bath in months.”

“Oh, okay…” Rin deflates so much that Maki feels a little guilty.

“It's not that I don't want to,” Maki reassures her quickly. “I just have that dinner thing later, so…”

“That's right! Your anniversary!” Hanayo rests a hand on Rin's arm. “We should leave Maki time to get ready. How about we try that new cafe out?”

“The ice cream place?” Rin's face lights up once again when Hanayo nods. “Sure! See you later, Maki! Have fun!”

Maki waves as they bustle out of the lab doors. She hums to herself as she rinses off some used beakers and wipes down the tables. All their hard work is finally paying off, and she’s got a bubble bath at home calling her name. There’s just so _much_ to be cheerful about lately.

She's still buzzing with energy when she leaves the building and walks to her car. She’s not usually the type to brag, but right now, she wants to shout out the good news from the rooftops to anyone who will listen. She even briefly considers making a post about it online, but she's not fond of publicly documenting all the minor details of her life. She just really wants to _tell_ someone - anyone!

She takes a second to ponder who to call, and only one face springs to mind. Someone who would definitely be excited for her. Before she can think twice about it, she's scrolling down her contact list and pressing the dial button.

The call connects on the second ring. “Maki?” Nico sounds surprised when she answers.

“Hey!” Maki exclaims, then frowns to herself. The rush of warmth that bubbles up below her throat at the sound of Nico's voice startles her. In an instant, she comes to her senses and realizes she hasn't thought much about what she actually wants to say. Fiddling with her keys and feeling suddenly shy, she stalls a bit. “How are… things?”

“Good,” Nico says slowly, dragging the word out. “Why are you, uh- Aren't you supposed to be at work?”

“I finished early! And-”

“And now you’re calling me up to brag about it? Well thanks, Maki.” Nico sighs. “I've still got another four hours to go.”

Heat rushes to Maki’s cheeks. She got so caught up in everything she hadn’t even considered that Nico has a busy day job too. “ _Right._ Sorry. I completely forgot that-”

“Just kidding! It’s cool. I'm actually on a break right now.”

“Oh!” Maki sighs with relief. “It's lucky I called at the right time, then.” She laughs softly. “Guess I must be psychic or something.”

“And since when did super scientist Maki Nishikino believe in that stuff?”

“I _don't,_ ” Maki insists. She shakes her head, even though Nico can't see her. “Maybe Nozomi's rubbing off on me. What would she say? That it's _fate_ or something?”

“ _Please_ don't learn any life lessons from Nozomi. In fact, don't ever listen to a word she says!” Nico laughs, but it's high pitched and something about it sounds _off_  “So, like... W-What's up?”

“I just wanted to tell you-” Maki falters. It'd probably sounds a little selfish and silly to most people, calling up to brag about something nice that’s happened. But Maki _knows_ Nico will be excited for her. She teases Maki about a lot of things, but she’d always be genuine about something like this. “I have some good news. And I just really wanted to share it with someone.”

The line goes so silent that for a moment, Maki thinks that maybe the call disconnected. When she lifts the phone from her ear to check though, Nico’s picture still displays on the screen. It’s odd. Nico normally would be all over her demanding more information already.

“N-Nico? You still there?”

From the other end, there’s the sound of a throat being cleared. “Did you and Tsubasa get engaged?”

“ _What?_ No! Why would you think that?” In her shock, her denial is more vehement than she means it to be. She tries to ignore the rush of panic that surges through her body and adds, more calmly, “I mean, no. It’s got- It’s got nothing to do with that.”

“Oh.” Maki can almost picture her shrugging her slender shoulders. “I just thought, you know, with the anniversary and everything...”

“Well, it’s not about Tsubasa. It’s about my work.” Maki takes a deep breath, trying to muster up her fast-fading excitement. The mention of Tsubasa threw her off, and she tries now to get back to the point. “You know that clinical trial I told you about? It just got greenlit.”

Nico gasps with some of her usual dramatic flair. “Really? Oh my god, that’s-” Abruptly, she stops. Maki’s brow furrows and she presses the phone harder to her ear and waits. When Nico speaks again, it’s flat and subdued. “That’s really great, Maki. I’m happy for you.”

Maki lingers, hoping Nico will elaborate, but there’s nothing. No shrill whoops of joy, no over-the-top celebrating, no million-watt smile that can literally be felt through the call.

The last of Maki’s enthusiasm fizzles out. “Yeah. Thanks.” She slumps back against the car seat, feeling like her heart has sunk all the way down to somewhere below her knees.

Nico coughs politely. “So… was there anything else? I'd better get back to work soon…”

It’s both egotistical and unreasonable to expect Nico to be excited about something she has no interest in. Maki knows this. But that doesn’t fill in the gaping pit of disappointment that’s spawned in her chest. A simple congratulations, an acknowledgement, courteous words. That should be all she’s expecting from the average acquaintance, yet somehow, down the line in her friendship with Nico, she’d just gotten used to _more_.

“No. That’s all,” she tells Nico. She tries to hold back a sigh. What was she thinking? She should never have interrupted Nico's well-earned break for something like this. “Sorry. I know you probably don't care, but I... I guess I just wanted to tell someone.”

“No, it’s totally fine! I'm happy for you,” Nico repeats. Then, more carefully, she adds, “And I bet Tsubasa was super proud when you told her.”

“Actually, I-” Maki tenses. She’d totally forgotten that she could’ve called Tsubasa about this. It’s embarrassing in retrospect, but without thinking she’d just chosen to call Nico first. “She doesn't know yet. I was gonna tell her later, so…”

There’s a long stretch where neither of them talk. Maki’s cheeks burn as she rubs a finger along the steering wheel absentmindedly. There’s no special meaning to why she wanted to Nico to know first, of course, but the realization bothers her anyway.

There’s a rush of static as Nico takes a deep breath on the other end of the line. “I should get back to work.” Her voice is flat, toneless.

Maki nods quickly, even though it’s just a phone call and she knows Nico can’t see her. “Of course. Sorry again for bothering you.”

“No problem. Oh and…” Maki perks up and she straightens her posture hopefully. “Say hi to Tsubasa for me. Your anniversary is soon, right?”

The temperature in the car seems to drop ten degrees.

“Maki? Still there?”

Through sheer force of will, Maki manages to squeeze an answer out of her throat. “Y-Yeah. We’re having dinner tonight, actually...”

“Cool. Have fun. Talk to you later.”

There’s a click and the call ends before Maki can even open her mouth. She’s left staring at the darkened screen of her phone blankly, still clutching the steering wheel. The pure joy she had felt a mere thirty minutes ago has completely disappeared.

She drops her phone down onto the passenger seat and through the numbness, starts her car.

She should've just gone straight home. She should've gone with Rin and Hanayo. She should’ve called Tsubasa. She should never have called Nico.

Maki’s never felt so stupid in her entire life.

***

“Here's to two wonderful years together.”

Maki smiles as she clinks her champagne flute against Tsubasa's. They couldn't have chosen a more wonderful location for tonight. There's a classical pianist playing, and Tsubasa looks so pretty in the dim light of the beautifully decorated restaurant, elegant as ever in a long silver dress. It's the perfect way to spend their anniversary. Maki couldn't be happier. And apparently, neither could Tsubasa.

“Tonight is _perfect_ ,” she declares, reaching for Maki's hand. “Thanks for booking my favourite restaurant.”

“Thanks for being here.” Maki feels her cheeks flush as she speaks, but she knows tonight isn't the time to be holding anything back. “I know things haven't always been easy for us… but I really do love you. I… I couldn't imagine my life without you.” Her gaze drops down to the white tablecloth. “I've been so happy lately and - and I know it's all because of you.”

“Ahhhh, Maki's so cute when she's honest,” a high voice cuts in from nowhere. “I'm so glad you finally appreciate Nico!”

“Huh?” Maki's head jerks up. When she looks around the restaurant, Tsubasa's nowhere to be found. And sitting across from her instead is - is _Nico?_

“What the-” Maki pulls her hand back. “W-Where's Tsubasa?”

“Who?” Nico tilts her head to the side. “You know, it's not nice to daydream about other girls on the night of our two year anniversary, Maki. Go back to telling me how much you love me!”

Maki splutters. “H-How much I... love… _you_?”

“Well, duh.” Nico takes her hand again and brushes her thumb across Maki’s knuckles. “At least that's what you tell me every night.”

Nico leans in closer over the candlelit table and it takes Maki's breath away, how _good_ she looks. Her long hair falls in loose curls over her pretty, pale shoulders. Her tight, red dress fits her perfectly, highlighting every soft curve of her body. Did she always look so mature? So _beautiful?_ Maki can barely take her eyes off her.

“Let's get out of here.” Nico's voice is practically a purr. There's a heat in her eyes that makes Maki shiver.

Before she can even open her mouth to respond, they're in a neatly decorated room with a large, plush bed. What happened to the restaurant? To the pianist and the dinner table? And most importantly, what happened to Nico's _clothes?_

Maki averts her eyes fiercely as Nico approaches slowly, wearing nothing but lacy black lingerie. She can't look. She won't look. She - oh God, since when was Nico so _hot?_

“What are you staring at?” Nico's fingers slide under the the hem of Maki's shirt. “Never seen your girlfriend naked before?”

Nico's right in front of her now, all warm hands and hot breath, and Maki’s drawn to her. She’s _captivated._  She can’t do anything but shift closer.

“I've been thinking about you _all day_ , you know.” Nico’s voice is a low murmur by Maki’s ear that makes her tremble. She can’t stop her hands from moving. They trail down Nico’s arm and into her long hair and before she knows it, she’s leaning down and her lips are so close to Nico's pretty pink mouth and -

Maki’s eyes snap wide open. She sits up, her chest heaving, and glances around wildly. For a few seconds, she has no idea where she is. Then, next to her, Tsubasa turns over in her sleep and she realizes she’s in her bedroom at home, where she belongs.

It takes a moment for her heartbeat to slow, and an even longer moment to remember why she woke up in the first place. She touches her fingers to her lips and they tingle with electricity.

_What the hell was that?_

Slowly, she sinks down, resting her head on the pillow. She pulls the covers up to her chin, the particulars of her dream still seeping back into her hazy memory. There had been the restaurant, Tsubasa, champagne -

 _Nico_.

The image of Nico’s slender figure, constrained only by thin, criminally skimpy underwear rises up in her mind and it takes all the willpower in her body not to scream in utter embarrassment and horror. How did her subconscious manage to conjure _that_ up? And _why_?

Maki forces herself to be logical. Obviously, her anniversary with Tsubasa has been at the forefront of her daily thoughts recently, which is why she’s seeing it in her sleep now. They’d had a great meal at the exact same restaurant featured in her dream, and it was an enjoyable evening, even though they were too tired afterwards to do much else. And as for the other part - well, if she’s being honest, Nico’s been a constant presence in her mind too lately. Just because they’ve become such good friends, of course. In fact, she'd spoken to Nico earlier in the day, during that phone call she'd rather not remember. So it’s no big deal if her brain had mixed the two factors together and created some bizarre fantasy out of them.

But while some details can easily be explained away, it’s harder for Maki to rationalize the heat that’s radiating from her lower body, or the vague sense of disappointment at how quickly the dream had ended. She drags her teeth over her lower lip and allows herself to wonder, just briefly, what would've happened if she'd slept for a few moments more. She knows she shouldn't dwell on those particular curiosities, but it's hard not to wonder how it might've felt. Whether Nico ever wears skimpy, sexy stuff like that in real life.

Tsubasa makes a soft murmur beside Maki, and the oppressive heat extinguishes and is rapidly replaced by an uncomfortable feeling of shame. She lies completely still, but Tsubasa makes no other sounds. Maki exhales and rolls slowly onto her side.

This is ridiculous. She's being ridiculous. It means nothing. It's merely an example of the troublesome and often humorous nature of the human subconscious. Maki dreamt she made her living off singing and dancing in front of hundreds of adoring fans once when she was younger, and that certainly never happened in the real world.

She forces her eyes shut and tries to ignore the stupid, sexy image of Nico in her mind. She just needs to sleep it off. Maki's sure she'll have forgotten about it by the morning.

But it's a long time before she can doze off again, and when she does, her slumber is restless and unfulfilling.

***

It's two days later before Maki feels brave enough to investigate further. She puts it off, makes excuses, distracts herself, wills herself to forget about it, but she knows she can't avoid it forever. She needs to confront it head on if she ever wants to put it to an end.

So she waits until the time is right, until Tsubasa's left the house, and as soon as the coast is clear she races over to the bathroom and starts the water running in their large, Western style bathtub.

She's going to need bubbles. A lot of them. This is an emergency.

Maki feels much calmer when she's safely entered the tub. Surrounded by lightly scented candles, submerged in steamy water that’s just short of scalding, she can feel the muscles in her shoulders and lower back relaxing, and she's finally able to organize her thoughts a little better. The nice bottle of red wine resting on the wooden bath board helps her along quite well, of course.

She's probably overreacting. That much is certain. Everyone knows the human subconscious is a fickle beast, with no rhyme or reason to it. She probably just ate a bad olive during their anniversary dinner and it caused a peculiar dream. That’s all. There’s absolutely nothing to be worried about.

But then why can't she forget about it? Why did it feel so _real?_ That's what she needs to find out.

Maki takes a large gulp of wine and she stares at her phone. She can’t just jump in and Google search “ _strange dream where my friend was naked??_ ” because even in the privacy of her own home, that would be mortifying _._ But she can't exactly text anyone to ask them about it either. As of recently, Nico been the main person she goes to for advice, but Maki would rather instantly cease to exist than have her ever find out about her dream.

It's not like she's spoken to Nico much anyway lately. Apart from that one awkward phone call, Maki’s barely heard from her at all since their shopping trip. In fact, their longest conversation as of late was when Maki told Nico that Tsubasa loved her present, and the only response she got was an underwhelming, “ _cool”._ Maybe for a regular human being, that’s nothing to be alarmed about, but for Nico hundreds-of-messages-a-day Yazawa, it’s _weird_. Maki didn't realize how much she'd gotten used to Nico's constant texts until they stopped. And it's not like Maki's been worried or anything, but... a tiny part of her wonders if maybe she's pissed Nico off or something. If maybe somehow she found out about Maki's terribly awkward and embarrassing dream. Maybe she knows and she's horrified, too disgusted to ever speak to Maki again.

Maki shakes her head. She knows she's being absurd. No more laughable speculation. What she needs are cold, hard facts.

She types _dreams_ into her search engine, and spends a good ten minutes skimming through the many results, consuming a large amount of online literature on the Psychology of sleep. It’s somewhat reassuring, actually. While scholars of the past had believed dreams to be full of hidden meanings and insights to the subconscious, most modern neuroscientists believe otherwise. It’s reassuring, but it’s still not specific enough. It still doesn’t relate to her unique situation _._ If she's going to do this, she needs to _commit_. She can’t go on like this any longer.

WIth shaking hands, Maki drains the wine in her glass, then swiftly types out, _why did I have a sex dream about my friend?_ She flushes as the results load, as words like _erotic_ and _intimate desire_ flood her screen.

She sifts through the first article she finds, and the nervous energy fluttering in her chest starts to subside. Relief spreads through Maki’s body. Sexual dreams about someone can mean a whole number of things. It can signify close friendship, an admiration of a person's positive traits… it doesn’t mean she wants to do those kinds of things with Nico afterall. Maki has nothing to worry about.

More confidently now, she goes back to the results of her search and reads some of the other links. They all cover pretty much the same points, but the reinforcement is nice. _3 Reasons Why Your Sexy Dream About Your Best Friend Is No Problem. 10 Ways Your Dreams Can Be Misleading_. _Should You Tell Your Friend About That Awkward Sex Dream You Had Last Night?_

There are so many articles, yet Maki finds herself clicking on link after link, glad to lose herself in the rabbit hole of terrible relationship advice web journalism written by people who are absolutely not even close to certified experts in their field. She gets a little distracted browsing, and it’s a good fifteen minutes before she blinks and realizes she’s gotten far away from her original, intended research and is now on an article titled _30 Best Ways to Talk to Your Crush_.

She hadn’t noticed how long she’s been in the tub already. Yawning a little, she prepares to close the tab, satisfied with her findings, when another suggested link catches her eye: _How To Tell You’re Slipping Into An Emotional Affair._

Maki’s brow furrows a bit as she sits up, interest vaguely piqued. Emotional affair? It’s the first time she’s ever come across the term, although it’s not exactly hard to guess what means. But how can you cheat if it’s not physical? Curiosity takes over and she clicks the link to find out.

There’s a brief description of the exact definition of an emotional affair at the top. She gets the gist of it - it’s when an originally platonic friendship becomes more important and emotionally intimate than a romantic relationship that one of the participants is in.

For some truly inexplicable reason, Nico’s face flashes across Maki’s mind, just once.

Reading more carefully now, Maki continues to scroll down. There’s a mini quiz at the end of it, a sort of self-evaluation to check if the reader’s possibly in the midst of an emotional affair of their own. Maki never really puts any stock into these frivolous online quizzes, but even she has to admit they’re addicting from time to time. They’re bad for your health, but you can’t stop - kind of like highly processed snack foods.

So she indulges her curiosity and takes the test. Just because she’s bored. Not because there’s a teeny, tiny part of her that’s suddenly a little apprehensive. There are only seven questions, each with a cheesy, colorful slider scale that runs from “not at all” to “all or most of the time.” It only takes about forty seconds to get through them all and send off her answers. She taps the “finish” button and the page refreshes.

Maki feels the blood in her veins freeze.

“100% LIKELY” is written at the top in flashing text, with a short description under it. Unbidden, her eyes leap to it.

 _Whoa there! Are you sure you're in the right relationship?_ read the green letters. _Maybe it's time to take a step back before anyone gets hurt._

Sweat forms on Maki's forehead. It's not because of the bath, which is barely lukewarm by now. She closes the tab quickly in denial.

It's ridiculous. Unthinkable. Nico's just a good friend. Besides, Maki's dating Tsubasa. She's in a great relationship, filled with everything she could ever want. Why would she have a… Why would she even remotely consider anything beyond normal friendship with Nico, of all people?

Maki's a respected researcher, and this was just one flawed test. Anyone who went to junior high school recognizes the importance of the scientific method. A single trial isn't enough to prove a hypothesis. And Maki's one hundred percent sure that if she takes another, less obviously biased quiz, she's sure to get a real answer.

She opens a new incognito tab. _Emotional affair quiz_ , she types. The resulting finds are mostly aimed towards men, but she taps on one anyway. Maybe the gender bias will actually work in her favor. Not that she's concerned, or anything.

Maki goes through the questions one by one. _Do you find yourself looking forward to hanging out with your friend all the time?_ She hesitates. She kind of does, but then again, everyone’s excited to spend time with their friends, right? _Do you tell that person things before you tell your partner?_ Yes, but that had only been because she knew Tsubasa was busy at work. _Do you feel emotionally closer to your friend than your partner?_ Well, Tsubasa isn’t exactly the type of person she can open up to easily all the time...

A sinking sensation settles at the pit of her stomach as she takes quiz after quiz. They all point to the same, impossible conclusion. After half a dozen, she lays her phone down carefully on the wooden board and nervously pours herself the last bit of wine in the bottle, then swallows it all in one gulp.

There's no reason to panic, Maki tells herself. These quizzes are arbitrary. They're unscientific. They're unworthy of consideration.

But images and memories come back to her unbidden now, despite how she tries to block them out. The night at the opera. The fireworks at the amusement park. Racing around the mall and laughing until her stomach hurt, more focused on Nico than her own girlfriend, when picking out the anniversary present. The way she’d watched Tsubasa’s face light up as she opened it and all she could think about was how much fun she’d had shopping with Nico. The little moments pile up like snow until they practically threaten to bury her.

She sinks her head under the cooling bathwater until she's completely submerged. She holds herself there for as long as she can, because it's peaceful, because when her lungs begin to ache the pain masks the burning of her too-fast heart.

She doesn't need a quiz to tell her what she feels. She already knows - has known for longer than she's cared to admit to herself. A terrible secret, one that can't be erased no matter how many times she clears her phone's browser history. She whispers it in a burst of bubbles beneath the surface of the water, where only she can hear.

Maki Nishikino is in love with Nico Yazawa.


	7. Lines In the Sand

**i.**

Nico steps out onto her balcony and breathes in the fresh, sea air. The early morning sunlight glitters as it reflects onto the calming waves of the crystal clear ocean in the distance, and it's so soothing that Nico's pretty sure she might actually be in paradise. They’re staying in a huge, fancy beach house that Kira Cosmetics has rented out especially for the shoot, and even just the chicly decorated twin room that she’s sharing with Eli feels more spacious than her entire apartment. And most amazingly of all, Nico's getting _paid_ to be here in Okinawa. Is this real? Is she dreaming?

She gazes out at the empty beach and the endless blue sky and everything seems _perfect._

The door to the balcony of the next room over clicks open and Nico turns her head just in time to see Maki yawning and stepping out through the glass doorway. It's obvious from her crumpled night clothes and her messy bedhead that she just woke up, and there's something both sweet and incredibly painful about catching her in such an private, every day moment. She raises her arms up into the air in a lazy stretch, and before Nico can pull back inside the room, Maki happens to turn and spot her.

Both of them freeze. Nico's mouth dries out instantly. Every nerve in her body scrambles. Thank God she already changed out of her bunny pajamas.

Maki quickly drops her arms back down and smoothes her hair back reflexively. “Oh. Morning,” she says, and Nico can hear an undercurrent of embarrassment. “I… I didn't realize you were next door.”

“Yep!” Nico makes a vague, superfluous gesture at the room behind her. “Me and Eli are right here. Did you sleep well? G-Great view, huh?”

“Yeah.” Maki barely glances at the insanely gorgeous scenery. She looks at her feet, at the balcony, and then, at Nico. “Uh. Before we start. I…  I wanted to ask-”

“Hey babe?” Tsubasa calls out from inside the other room. “Can you come back in here? I need you to-” She leans out onto the balcony. “Oh, hi Nico. Sorry to interrupt but I really need Maki. We only have thirty minutes, so hurry up.” Tsubasa hooks a finger under the thin strap covering Maki's shoulder. “Clothes off.”

Nico flinches as a visual image she really doesn't want forces itself to the front of her mind. It’s so jarring and unwelcome that it makes her feel nauseous. Maki, it seems, is equally taken aback.

“W-Why,” she splutters out, crossing her arms over her chest.

“We need to figure out which swimsuit will look better on camera,” Tsubasa leans against the door frame, holding up a selection of positively tiny bikinis. A sly smile crosses her lips. “What did you _think_ I meant?”

Nico doesn’t want to hear the answer to that question. “I-I'd better go check on the... makeup brushes! See you down there!” She backtracks swiftly into her room without another glance at the couple, heaving out a sharp breath as she slides the door closed behind her.

Eli turns towards the sound, midway through tying her long hair into a high ponytail. “Everything okay?” she asks.

Nico pauses to assess the facts. Maki and her powerful, flirty girlfriend are sleeping right next door. She has to spend all day acting professional around Maki while her stupidly hot body is covered only by the smallest of swimsuits. And Nico just so happens to be painfully in love with her.

“Everything's _great_ ,” Nico says. “I'm gonna head down and get stuff ready!”

Maybe not so perfect after all.

***

It's not that Nico hasn't been trying to put a respectable amount of space between herself and Maki. In fact, she's been trying so hard that she deserves a whole awards ceremony dedicated to her honorable conduct. Ever since that day at the mall, she’s been super careful about texting Maki, letting a suitable amount of time pass before replying and making sure every word is completely friend-appropriate. The urge to just message her at a normal, non-snail’s pace has been strong, of course, but Nico is an expert in interpersonal relationship and she knows - just _knows_ \- that the best way to get over this silly little dumb crush is to give it some time and space.

So she tries not to think about Maki. She tries not to wonder how she’s doing, or if she’s keeping up with the special, five-step skincare routine Nico outlined for her. She definitely doesn’t spend a mildly obsessive number of hours imagining how Maki’s anniversary dinner with Tsubasa might’ve gone (where they went, what she wore, if she was happy). Her chest doesn’t clench with startling pain when Maki sends her a hesitant, bashful update on the snow globe and how much Tsubasa loved it.

Yes, Nico’s determined to get through this. She’s going to quash every single improper feeling she has for Maki until there’s just good, wholesome friendship left in her heart. That’s the only way she can emerge out of this without causing any unnecessary awkwardness between her and Maki and Tsubasa. She owes that to them. It’s the right thing to do.

Of course, it’s a lot harder to stick to her convictions when part of her job involves literally touching the face and lips of the girl she’s not supposed to like.

Nico’s all tightly wound nerves and shaking hands as she fiddles with the bronzer on the makeup stand, but she knows she has to pull herself together. She made it here in one piece, despite how much Tsubasa and Maki strolling into the airport together yesterday evening looking like some perfect, fashionable celebrity couple made her want to turn around and leave. She survived sitting behind the two of them in Business Class on the plane; survived overhearing snippets of their conversation and trying not to stare at the glimpse of Maki through the gaps between the seats.

It’s only two days, Nico thinks as she paces around their large, spacious makeup tent. She should focus on how cool it is that she - and okay, the models - get their very own space to prepare and relax, right on the beach! And doing the makeup for the commercial might be kind of uncomfortable, but at least it’ll be the last time. The last time she’ll ever get to be so close to Maki.

“Wow, this place is so cute!” Nico jumps as Kotori rushes in excitedly and does a quick lap of the tent.

“Yeah, it’s pretty cool, right?” Nico agrees. She feels a warm rush of relief as Kotori starts setting up in front of the next mirror over. At least Nico won’t be stuck all alone with Maki if Kotori’s styling hair right there next to her. There’s no way things will get too awkward when there’s a whole bunch of them in here.

One of Tsubasa’s assistants - the taller, scarier one - ducks her head through the entrance of the tent, clipboard in hand. “Models are on their way. Get ready.”

Nico gulps and straightens up as the tall woman pulls back the heavy burlap flap and stands back to let the others in.

The photo campaign has so far mainly featured Maki, but Kira Cosmetics recruited a couple of models to help round out the shooting in Okinawa. The new models - Umi Sonoda and Honoka Kousaka - file in first, offering polite nods and cheerful greetings. Nico’s heard of them before, and while neither of them are internationally renowned supermodels, they both have a cheerful and energetic air about them that’s perfect for a beach commercial like this one. At any other time, Nico would consider asking them for their autographs, but she’s more than a little preoccupied as one more person enters.

Maki blinks rapidly as she gazes around the room, her eyes taking a moment to adjust to the sudden dimness of the tent after the bright sunlight outside. Nico’s breath is kind of just knocked out of her lungs all at once, and she can only watch helplessly until Maki turns her head towards Nico and locks eyes with her.

Nico’s hit by a wave of uncomfortable feelings. She missed talking to Maki. She hates how just being around her makes Nico feel elated and terrified all at once. Maki’s wearing just a light robe and it’s slightly open and Nico can tell that all she’s wearing underneath is one of those little bikinis Tsubasa was waving around on the balcony and she can’t do this. She’s hopping the first flight back to Tokyo. How can she possibly stay professional when Maki’s not looking away and Nico’s going to have to get so close and touch her face and -

“Maki,” Kotori chirps, waving her hand. “You’re over here with me!”

Maki turns away and just like that, the moment’s over.

Nico plasters on a grin and points at one of the models. “Then I guess you’re up first, Kousaka.”

“Honoka’s fine,” she replies cheerfully. “Isn’t it crazy how it’s so hot? It’s not even 9 in the morning and I’m already _dying_ -”

Nico gets to work, trying to settle into her usual rhythm. She’s only partially successful, though concentrating on responding to Honoka’s incessant chatter helps quite a bit with ignoring how nervous Maki’s presence makes her feel. She’s so busy matching color palettes for two strangers on the fly that the time passes more quickly than she anticipates, and for a moment she allows herself to hope that things won’t turn out too badly after all.

Unfortunately, her hopes are short-lived. She’s just finishing up with Umi when out of the corner of her eye she sees Kotori stepping back and nodding in approval at her own handiwork. The cute stylist clasps her hands together happily.

“All done!” She catches Nico’s eye and smiles. “Oh, looks like Honoka’s ready and Umi’s just about done too, huh?” Maki turns to look as well.

Nico’s heart skips a beat. “W-Well, Umi still needs a little work but-”

“Really?” Honoka butts in, peering into the mirror Umi’s sitting in front of. “But she looks great! And didn't you just say she only needs some powder or something?”

“W-Well, that might take a minute,” Nico says, laughing nervously. She tries to stall, taking her time to select a powder and a setting spray to make the makeup last under the hot sun, but everything is so neatly organized that the whole process takes, at most, two minutes.

“I'm gonna head out there and see if they need any help setting up,” Kotori says, gesturing towards the exit. “Do you two wanna come?”

“To the beach?” Honoka hops up out of her chair. “Always!”

Nico shoots a mildly desperate look in Umi's direction. “I-I still have to do Maki's makeup, but it's totally cool if you wanna hang out here-”

“Come on, Umi!” Before Umi even has a chance to respond, Honoka takes her by the elbow and pulls her up. “Let’s go look for seashells!”

Umi does dig in her heels, but only so that she can make a formal bow at Nico. “I'd like to explore the filming location a little more thoroughly before we start,” she intones dutifully. “Thanks for your hard work.”

“Yeah, thanks Nico!”

The three shuffle out before Nico can protest any further. Nico can hear Honoka's excited voice as it fades into the distance, leaving behind a deafening silence.

Nico stares down at her makeup collection. There's a long moment before either of them moves. Then, Maki stands and brushes away some miniscule, possibly imaginary flecks of dust from her robe.

“Guess it’s my turn,” she says, a little stiffly, and Nico can only nod. Without another word, Maki slides into the makeup chair and crosses one leg over the other.

Nico takes a deep breath to steel herself. She’s done Maki’s makeup before. She’s done it plenty of times! She just needs to calm down and be professional. Act like she always does - or did, before she realized her feelings for Maki, anyway.

She forces the biggest, most painful smile possible onto her face. “Let’s get started!” she chirps, and grabs some primer. Out of habit, she almost squeezes some into her palm, but then she pauses. Surely, Maki can at least put the primer on properly by herself now, and Nico's willing to take as many shortcuts as possible to reduce the amount of time she spends being far too close to her. She holds out the small container and attempts a casual shrug when Maki gives her a confused look.

“So it’s been a while, huh?” Nico says, reasoning that maybe if she attempts to make conversation then it’ll pass the time quicker.

“Yeah. Feels like a long time since you…” Maki looks down at her lap, her voice trailing off to a stop.

“Since I did your makeup?” Nico fills in.

Maki pauses, before she nods. “Yeah.”

They fall back into silence. It kind of reminds Nico of when they first started out, with neither of them speaking because of pure, mutual dislike, and she has to bite back a hysterical giggle. The reason for their silence is so different now. Nico has to wonder if they were better off before. Those were simpler times, at least.

It’s difficult for Nico to keep Maki at arm's length when her job description is basically _get all up in Maki’s face,_ but she definitely tries. In fact, she finds herself doing that quite literally, standing so far back that her arm is almost entirely straight as she applies Maki’s foundation. And though she _thinks_ she’s being subtle about it, apparently that’s not the case.

“Is that… comfortable?”

“Uh huh! It's a new technique! Makes it apply smoother.” Nico forces a cheerful smile, but Maki looks at her like she’s crazy. What is she doing _?_ She’s so hyper aware of Maki that she’s totally forgot how to act normal. “But I guess if you wanna do things the old fashioned way…”

She shifts a step closer and Maki flinches and for a brief, panicked second Nico's sure that she _knows._ But that's not possible. Maki's totally oblivious and Nico is nailing this whole acting normal for the sake of friendship thing and there's nothing to worry about, except how close Maki's face is and how nice she smells and oh God, why can't life give Nico a _break?_

“C-Can you turn your head?” Nico asks. She feels heat rush instantly to her cheeks when Maki's face is suddenly entirely too close to her chest. “Uh. Other way.”

“R-Right. Sorry.”

Nico reaches for her concealer and misses, cursing under her breath as she knocks over a whole row of neatly arranged products. She suppresses a sigh as she scrambles to stand them up again. This totally _sucks._ She’s being paid by her favourite company to spend two days in a beautiful place with people she likes, and all she has to do in return is apply makeup to attractive models. She's basically living the dream she’s always deserved, but she’s too wound up to actually enjoy it. She picks up her concealer - with no clumsy incidents this time - and turns back around.

“Nico...” Maki’s eyes are wide and full of concern. She’s so close that her breath prickles against Nico’s skin. “Are you… Are you okay?”

“Me?” Nico points at herself and looks around, as though it’s possible that Maki could be talking to someone else. “Oh, I'm fine! It's just super hot in here. I'm, like, totally overheating!”

By the way her mouth turns downward, Nico can tell that Maki’s not impressed by her flimsy excuse. But what she’s supposed to say? She definitely can’t tell the truth about why she’s so jumpy. She twirls the brush in her hand in a mock businesslike manner and forces herself to get closer.

“Anyway, less chitchat Maki. Lemme concentrate.”

Hurt flashes across Maki’s features. She opens her mouth, as if she’s about to protest, but then she just shrugs and slackens a little. Relieved, Nico scans her face, searching for any blemishes that need covering up. Maki’s never really needed much concealer, except for the bags under her eyes on occasion. After more than a month of not examining it carefully, though, Nico realizes for the first time how much clearer her complexion’s gotten. She almost asks if Maki’s actually been following her skincare instructions, but she catches herself at the last moment and refrains. Nico will keep any observations to herself today. She won't even chide Maki over the fact that she's obviously still not getting nearly enough sleep.

Nico busies herself with those dark circles, but Maki doesn’t do her the courtesy of closing her eyes. She just continues to look up at Nico, as if making Nico miserable is her whole life purpose or something. Or, okay, _maybe_ she isn't really acting so different to any other regular customer, but would it kill her to look away? Doesn’t she see how she’s totally throwing Nico off her makeup game?

“Why are you so quiet?”

Nico’s arm twitches dangerously at Maki’s sudden question. With careful, light strokes, she finishes up with the concealer and takes a step back before answering.

“I’m just… focusing! I know I make it _look_ easy, Maki, but the art of makeup requires absolute-”

“You weren’t this quiet during the photoshoots,” Maki cuts in flatly. She examines her fingernails, then adds, “You never shut up, actually.”

 _Crap_. That's a very good point. Maybe Nico's _not_ doing so well with the whole acting normal thing. She begins applying blusher to Maki's face with cautious, gentle motions. “Well, maybe things are different in Okinawa,” she says, evasively.

Maki narrows her eyes. In her peripheral vision, Nico sees her hands clench. She takes a deep breath, and Nico just _knows_ that Maki’s figured out her stupid feelings. She flinches, waiting for everything to come collapsing down on her.

Maki takes a breath and then pushes out her question in a rush, as if she was holding it in. “Are you mad at me?”

Nico hand slips and suddenly one of Maki’s cheeks looks _way_ more flushed that the other. _That_ isn’t what she’d been expecting. She blends furiously, trying to even out the mistake.

“Mad?” she repeats deliberately, to buy herself some time. “Why would I be mad?”

When Maki continues, her words come out more reluctantly. “You're acting _weird_ and you've barely sent me any annoying messages lately and I know I've probably done something to piss you off so-” Maki's tone softens, and she sounds less accusatory. More dejected. “So at least tell me what I did wrong.”

It takes a lot for Nico not to laugh at the irony that it's almost the exact opposite. It's unusual for Maki to be so direct, but from the look in her eyes and the tremble in her voice, it's obvious she's been really worried about this. Nico feels a rush of guilt. She's been trying to do what's best for their friendship and be less clingy, but she never really thought about how that might make Maki feel. She never dared to assume that Maki might miss talking to her too.

“You didn’t do _anything_ wrong. I’ve just been a little busy, that's all! You know how it is.” Maintaining an innocent, casual expression is a challenge for Nico, especially when she’s a mere few inches away from Maki’s face. She tries to focus on the makeup. If she works fast enough, then this conversation will be over sooner.

“I just…” Maki chews on her lip. She doesn’t exactly look convinced. “I thought maybe that's why it seems like you don't want to be here.”

Nico has to stop herself from wincing. She always thought she was a pretty good actress. She didn’t realize she was being so obvious. “I definitely do want to be here! Things have just been kind of crazy...”

“W-Well, you can talk to me, you know,” Maki says with an earnest look of determination. She's come along way from the cold, closed-off girl that Nico first met. “I might not have any good advice but - but I'm your friend. So if I did something wrong then-”

“I swear it’s not that! It’s just-”

Nico pauses. What can she possibly say? That it's actually all her fault? That she's ruined everything with the best friend she's made in a long time because she's selfish, because her stupid heart can't be happy that Maki's in a relationship with probably the coolest person on the planet. How she can possibly explain the terrible way she yearns for Maki, despite knowing it could never ever happen, despite not even really wanting it to because if it did… everything would change.

Nico turns away, sighing as she leans her weight onto the makeup counter. She looks down, avoiding her own reflection in the nearby mirror. She hears Maki shift behind her. Hears her move from the chair.

“Just what?” Maki’s voice makes her shiver. Nico can _feel_ how close she is, and she knows that if she shifted back even slightly they’d be touching. And part of her wants that. A selfish, reckless part of her wants to lean back against the heat of Maki’s skin - or to turn around, to close those few inches between their bodies just to see how Maki reacts.

But she can’t. She won't. She never will.

Nico swallows, but it does nothing to soothe her dry throat. “I’ve just… been busy,” she repeats lamely. When Maki tenses, she tries to soften the blow. “It’s not your fault. And I promise I'm not mad at you. Really. It's just… something I have to sort out by myself.”

It's not even a lie. Technically it’s true. And Nico really hopes that Maki believes her.

“Okay…” Maki sinks back down into her chair, and something about her expression seems relieved - more relaxed than before, though still wary. Thankfully, she doesn’t press the issue further. She just closes her eyes as Nico begins working on them.

The reprieve from her scrutinization gives Nico more time to consider how careless she’s been. Of course Maki noticed that something was up. The fact that she’s been bothered enough to ask about it fills Nico with an odd warmth. It doesn’t exactly help to know Maki cares, but it makes her happy anyway. Which is why, despite all her cautions, she can’t help but open her mouth once more.

“Maki?”

“Hmm?”

“Ah. So you _are_ still awake.”

Maki keeps her eyes closed, but her mouth twists into a smile. “Barely.”

Even though Maki can’t see her, Nico smiles back. For a moment, things just feel normal again. Maybe that’s why it feels so easy to say what’s on her mind. “I just wanted to say… thanks. For being so nice and checking in on me and stuff.”

It’s kind of funny, how Nico’s close enough to feel Maki’s face get warmer before she sees it. “I-It’s not like it’s been constantly on my mind or anything. I was just a little worried, that’s all.”

“Yeah, well…” Nico feels herself flush too, and she continues on quickly before she chickens out. “It seriously means a lot. Though it did surprise me. No offense, but it’s kind of not like you to be so direct and so open and so...”

Maki opens her violet eyes and Nico forgets how to breathe. Something about the warmth of her expression makes Nico’s words fizzle out abruptly. It’s impossible not to notice how close Maki is, and how soft her skin is. How she can feel Maki’s breath tickling her fingertips.

“It’s all thanks to you,” Maki says, softly.

Nico fumbles and she almost drops her makeup brush. “Huh?”

“You changed me, Nico.”

Nico’s pulse races. With one eye finished and the other half done, anyone else would look a crazy mess, but somehow, Maki’s still so _beautiful._ Of course, she’s always been attractive, but her soft expression and this new, wholehearted sincerity make her positively _radiant_ \- too bright to look directly at, too perfect to tear her gaze away from. There’s an ache in Nico’s chest that’s so overpowering she’s a little concerned her heart might actually stop beating, but Nico can’t blame herself really. Right now, it’s impossible to imagine someone _not_ falling for Maki.

“O-Of course!” she manages to wheeze out. Hopefully her cheeks aren’t as red as they _feel_ \- because if Nico gets any hotter her head’s probably going to spontaneously combust. “N-Nico’s an asset to society! Now, close your eyes again. I won’t allow us to get behind schedule!”

It’s easier to breathe when Maki’s eyes are closed again. Nico’s glad that years of putting on makeup has given her a infallibly steady hand, even when her muscles feel like jelly. She tries to hurry through the rest, if only so she doesn’t have to be so close to Maki anymore. But the words echo through her head even as she works silently: _You changed me, Nico_.

“Right,” she says, putting the cap back on the liquid eyeliner, if only as an excuse to break the silence. “I guess we’re almost done!”

Maki opens her eyes slowly, like she's just waking up, and Nico admires her excellent work. She’s done such a good job she wants to pat herself on the back. But then, who would expect anything less from the great Nico Yazawa, of course.

“Just the lipstick now,” she announces, her spirits much higher than before. All in all, things could’ve gone a lot worse. Sure, it was a little awkward at first, but they’re still friends, above all else. She’s been so worked up about her feelings, but if she stops to think about it, staying friends with Maki is still totally possible. Buoyed by the idea, she’s almost humming as she turns back around, clutching a nice shade of red.

Her good mood falls to pieces.

She miscalculated. She was too optimistic, too hopeful, and she let down her guard. And now she’s paying the price for it. Because there's Maki right in front of her, all ready for Nico to apply the lipstick, her lips slightly parted, her head tilted up, and her violet eyes are wide and shining and she looks just like someone waiting to be kissed.

For just one second, Nico imagines leaning forward. She imagines how it would feel if instead of the lipstick, she pressed her own lips against Maki’s. In the filtered lighting of the tent, it almost seems like the color in Maki’s cheeks is a flush of anticipation, though Nico knows that it’s just the blush she’d applied a few minutes ago. She notices, with an almost detached awe, the grace with which Maki’s eyelashes flutter as she blinks, the gentle rise and fall of her shoulders as she breathes.

How could she have been so careless? Maki’s the smartest, prettiest, most incredible girl she’s ever met - the one person Nico can’t have, the only person she’s _ever_ wanted this badly - and Nico really thought, for even one second, that things could turn out okay?

Of _course_ she and Maki can’t just _stay friends_.

“Nico…?”

Nico snaps back to reality at once. Shame settles deep in her stomach as it registers that she really just got lost in a daydream about kissing someone else’s _girlfriend_.

With an automatic motion, she places the lipstick at the corner of Maki’s mouth. She draws a careful line of red across the other girl’s lips. After so many months working at the mall, it’s a simple task for Nico to apply it without a single smudge. Her arm goes slack as soon as she finishes, and it’s only through sheer willpower that she doesn’t just drop it onto the wooden floor.

Maki gazes up at her questioningly. “How is it?”

Nico averts her eyes. She jerks her head towards the mirror, hoping Maki’s reflection will be at least slightly less blinding than the real thing. It’s not.

“You look-” A bunch of words spring to mind. _Beautiful. Gorgeous. So painfully pretty_. In the mirror, she sees Maki bite her lower lip. “All set for the commercial,” she finishes quickly.

“Oh. Great.” Maki almost seems disappointed. Nico’s not sure what she expected. She examines herself in the mirror, as if searching for something inside it. Her hand plays idly with a stray Q-tip that’s been left on the table. “Well. I guess that’s it.”

“I guess so!” Nico’s voice is an over-enthusiastic chirp. She just wants to get this over with and go back to the others, where it’s safe. “Let’s go show everyone!” she suggests, and without waiting for Maki to agree, she begins striding towards the exit.

“Nico, wait!”

The hint of desperation in Maki’s voice makes Nico turn back around, despite herself. Maki’s rising from her seat so fast she almost overturns it. She takes a step forward, her hands clenching into fists, her mouth opening to speak.

“Nico, I…” Maki takes a deep, nervous breath, and for just a second, Nico’s mind races with the possibilities. Which is stupid, she tells herself. Maki could be about to say anything. She could be about to say she needs to use the restroom. Or that she has indigestion.

Somehow, though, she knows it’s something more.

They stare at each other from across the tent. It’s so quiet that Nico can hear the distant cries of the seagulls outside. She doesn’t even dare to breathe. She just waits for Maki to say something - anything.

Then, Maki blinks.

She wavers, and her expression grows uncertain, like she's debating something. She abruptly shakes her head. “Nevermind. It’s nothing.”

In spite of herself, a prickle of curiosity rises up in Nico's chest. She steps forward, closing the space between them. “What was it?” she demands, more insistently. “Tell me!”

“It's nothing!” Maki makes a movement to back away, but Nico's ready for it. Without thinking, she reaches out for Maki’s arm.

It's like a shock of static electricity. Nico swears her fingertips actually burn when she touches Maki's bare skin. She inhales sharply at the contact. Maki’s violet eyes widen. Did… did she just feel that too?

Nico’s heart beats fast and loud as she and Maki gaze at each other. She really should let go, but her fingers refuse to cooperate. So she just swallows and asks again, more quietly.

“What were you going to tell me?”

A confusing mix of emotions flit across Maki’s face, too quick for Nico to even begin to speculate about. She knows enough to not push it; she simply waits for Maki to make her decision. But she also doesn’t loosen her grip on the other girl’s elbow.

Maki closes her eyes. She breathes in sharply. Her lips part.

“The thing is, I-”

“Hey, are you guys all ready?” Nico nearly jumps out of her skin as the friendlier looking assistant bursts through the entrance to the tent. She and Maki spring apart as if scalded. “Tsubasa wants to get going, like, basically now so-” She pauses and notices their wild expressions. “Is everything okay in here?”

“We’re good,” Maki blurts, her eyes dropping to the floor.

“All ready,” Nico agrees, and similarly studies the wood beneath her feet.

The assistant’s gaze lingers on them for a moment longer, then she nods and ushers them towards the exit. “Cool. Let’s go shoot a commercial! Robe off please, Maki. We’ll leave it in here.”

Maki crosses her arms tightly across her chest. “What? Why?”

“Well, you won’t be needing it out there!” The assistant chirps, tugging it from Maki’s shoulders.

Nico’s mouth goes dry. She knew that she’d be seeing Maki in a bikini at some point today, sure. She was totally probably kind of prepared for this eventuality. But she didn’t think it’d be _right now_. The robe drops and suddenly there’s a whole lot more of Maki’s smooth skin on display and it takes every ounce of Nico’s self control to avert her eyes, to stop her gaze from trailing down Maki’s barely clothed body.

This isn’t what Nico signed up for. She’s too weak to handle this.

It’s going to be a long, hot day.

 

 

 

**ii.**

Maki fully intended to keep her distance. She really did.

The revelation - that she’d developed feelings for someone other than her girlfriend - had been a shock, to say the least. It was quite an achievement that she hadn’t just drowned herself right there in the bathtub. She’d certainly considered it, because at least death would be easier and more comfortable than dealing with her feelings.

But, for better or worse, she’d pulled herself together. One very minor meltdown and several more glasses of wine later, Maki had calmed down and reviewed the whole situation in her mind. The inevitable conclusion, of course, was that she needed to shut down whatever weird feelings she has while she still had the chance.

It all made sense, when she thought about it rationally. Tsubasa's been so busy that she's basically had no time for Maki, which led to her feeling lonely. Then Nico came into her life - bursting with irritating opinions, with sparkling warmth and kindness - and a bunch of convenient situations had led to Maki getting attached to her. Due to her loneliness, perhaps a little _too_ attached. But that's pretty normal, right?

It isn’t love, of course. She might have jumped to _that_ conclusion, drunk off wine and soaking miserably in the bathtub, but in hindsight, it seemed almost laughable. Nico’s been a great friend and her primary emotional support for the past few months, and as a consequence Maki’s come to depend on her a _lot_ more than she’d ever planned to, but it isn’t _love_. It's _something,_ sure. An inconvenient infatuation. A close, warm, confusing admiration.

That’s all.

Maki felt certain that this must happen to other couples all the time. That all she needed to do was focus on her relationship. Remember how happy Tsubasa probably used to make her feel, and just concentrate on getting those good times back. She'd stop getting distracted by a certain irritatingly cute, makeup artist and re-devote herself to her actual partner. Because Tsubasa’s beautiful and kind and generous and loving. Because her parents have already accepted Tsubasa, however begrudgingly, as someone worthy of dating her. She’s lucky to have such a perfect girlfriend in her life - even Nico’s said as much!

She recognized the fortuitous timing of the Okinawa trip, too. The perfect opportunity to rekindle that flame that surely used to burn brightly between them. Wasn’t that the whole point of the campaign, anyway? She’d just lean into it. Finish the commercial, and everything will be back to normal. She just needs to enjoy the sunshine, have a few drinks with Tsubasa, and above all, stay the hell away from Nico.

She'd felt quite sure that it wouldn't be a difficult task, considering Nico hadn’t even messaged her once since that disastrous phonecall. It seemed pretty obvious, during that long, confusing week after her anniversary, that Maki was getting the cold shoulder, and although it was frustrating not knowing _why,_ then again, why not? Maki’s been a bad girlfriend and a bad person. It was entirely possible that Nico had caught onto her feelings and didn’t want the burden. If that was the case, she wouldn't even be annoyed. It's not like she deserves any better.

After a _lot_ of reflecting, it all seemed so clear to Maki. She’d use the Okinawa trip to get her life back on track. And when she was finally free of moonlighting as a model, she’d leave all of it behind and live a happy life with Tsubasa, keeping Nico as a close friend and nothing more.

It all made perfect sense.

Until Maki was left alone with Nico in that stupid tent.

Those minutes Nico spent touching her face, applying makeup with the gentlest of touches, had felt like the longest in Maki’s life. Even knowing she isn’t _actually_ in love with Nico hadn’t stopped her stomach from doing somersaults or her face from heating up like the surface of the Sun.

And when she found out - that Nico doesn’t hate her - well, she’d let her guard down. She’d let warmth bloom soft and hopeful in her chest and she’d said a lot of dumb things. In that moment, her resolve had wavered, and she’d let herself consider that maybe, just maybe, she’s making all the wrong decisions.

She'd come far too close to saying things she shouldn't even _think_ about. Who knows what would've happened if they hadn't been interrupted. Who knows what treacherous words would've come tumbling from her mouth.

Maki knows she can't keep putting herself in these situations. She can't indulge her deluded daydreams anymore. Nico might be a good friend and a great person, but her relationship with Tsubasa is her reality. Her only choice is to stay away from Nico until all of this blows over.

Predictably, that’s a lot easier said than done.

The commercial shooting proceeds without much of a hitch. Maki’s a little nervous at first; Umi and Honoka are professional models, after all, so it’s hard not to wonder how she’ll shape up next to them, whether she’ll be outed as some kind of modelling fraud. Everyone is more than accommodating, though, and the commercial doesn’t actually involve much aside from pretending to play in the water and posing for close up beauty shots.

It’s actually quite a pleasant distraction. Worrying whether her expression looks odd or if she should’ve eaten a smaller breakfast is preferable in every way to all those other thoughts that’ve been weighing on her mind lately. Once she gets into it, it’s even somewhat enjoyable. Eli makes several comments on how pleased she is, and Maki trusts her judgement enough to know that what she’s capturing must be really good _._ It’s a little off-putting at first, with way more people watching than she’s used to, but at least she’s not alone. Maki worried at first that the other models might be snobbish and look down on her for her lack of experience, but they’re nothing but supportive. They’re so genuinely positive that Maki almost forgets she’s being filmed. It _almost_ feels like a normal day at the beach with friends. Well... friends who she only met a day ago.

It's all going well, until Eli instructs her to change it up and Maki flounders momentarily. She might be much better at modelling now, but at this point she’s exhausted all four of her good poses and she has no idea what to do next. Thankfully, Eli picks up on that and gives her direction.

“Try turning your head to the left,” she says. “And don't look directly into the camera.”

Maki reluctantly complies. She’s been avoiding making eye contact with the rest of the crew during filming out of pure embarrassment, but there's one person she's been incredibly aware of anyway. She knows Nico's been there the whole time, observing the photoshoot from afar, standing a little bit behind the rest of their group. And somehow, when Maki looks away like Eli asks, Nico’s the first thing her eyes settle on.

Her expression surprises Maki. During their initial shoots she was always an excitable, Tsubasa loving, borderline annoying super fan, so it’s only natural for Maki to expect the same today. But Nico doesn’t look like that at all. In fact, her face is so serious that it’s kind of unreadable.

Nico snaps out of it quickly when she realizes Maki’s looking at her and flashes a reassuring smile in her direction. And then she strikes an elegant pose. Maki’s blinks in confusion, and then it occurs to her that Nico’s helping her again _._ She doesn’t really have anything to lose so she draws herself up taller and mirrors Nico. Maki looks back to the camera, and she hears Tsubasa gasp.

“That’s _perfect_ ,” Eli gushes. “Oh my god, don’t move. This shot is fantastic.”

Maki relaxes into the pose. She takes a deep breath of the fresh, sea air and all the tension she’s been holding onto slowly begins to leave her body. She’s proud to have been part of this campaign, proud she's been able to support Tsubasa’s hard work, proud she managed to pull off something that seemed so completely impossible. And she’s thankful, too, for the friends she made along the way. Everything has changed so much in these last few months. And, once again, Maki’s overwhelmed with the feeling that it’s all thanks to Nico.

Tsubasa claps her hands together as Eli lowers her camera, and everyone gravitates towards her naturally, the way they always do. “That’s a wrap! Thanks so much for your hard work, everyone. Now, let’s get all this packed away quickly so we can enjoy ourselves. We’ve all worked hard today, and I _insist_ everyone sticks around to celebrate.”

As everyone smiles and starts happily chatting, Maki’s gaze finds Nico again. And the strangest thing is, despite all the commotion, Nico’s eyes are fixed on her too. It’s barely a few seconds before Nico turns away, but somehow it feels like so much longer. And despite all her resolve, despite what she knows she has to do, all Maki really feels like doing is dropping back until she’s walking alongside her and asking how she did, just to hear Nico praise her once more before this all ends.

“Last one in the water has to buy us all dinner!” An orange blur speeds past her and cannonballs into the glittering, azure sea. The rest of them turn to watch as, a moment later, Honoka’s head pops up above the surface of the water.

Umi follows at a slower pace, panting slightly. “We were just _in_ the water,” she complains, even as she trudges across the soft, hot sand to join the other model. “And dinner is provided,” she adds, but there’s not much conviction in her tone, and Maki can spy a smile playing around her lips.

The rest of the crew - most of them not in swimwear - split off. Some of them set up umbrellas and clear away equipment. Others run back to the vacation house to grab beach-appropriate attire. Nico’s one of them. Maki can hear her excitedly commenting to Kotori about how long it’s been since she’s swam in the sea.

“Come on, Maki!” Honoka calls, her loud voice carrying over the waves. “The water’s so warm!”

Maki knows that. They spent most of the commercial either splashing about in the shallows or walking at the edge of the waterline, their toes squishing in the wet sand. After a whole three hours on the beach, not reapplying sunscreen would practically be _begging_ for a sunburn - or at least, a horribly uneven tan. But even at the hottest time of day, concerns about proper skin care aren't enough to make her rush back to the house and cover up.

Maki smiles and pivots to face the ocean. She digs her bare heels deep into the sand and propels herself forward. She grabs one of the big, colorful beach balls from the props area along the way and she runs a little to catch up. She doesn't often get a chance to be somewhere so nice. She might as well do her best to enjoy it.

***

It’s perhaps the nicest beach trip Maki’s ever been on, and she spent a _lot_ of time at her family's various summer houses when she was younger. But while those days were mostly passed lounging in the shade, reading novels and lacking anyone her own age to spend time with, this is completely different. Today, she's not sure anyone would allow her to retreat to a quiet spot on her own. And, more importantly, Maki’s not even the slightest bit inclined to do so.

While Tsubasa’s still busy reviewing the footage with Eli, Maki keeps to Honoka and Umi, who make perfectly pleasant company despite their polar opposite personalities. And initially, it works. She barely even thinks about Nico.

Only - it's harder to avoid her when they're all out in the open like this. Even when she's helping Honoka gather seashells along the shore, her gaze can't help but drift towards Nico, reposing languidly on a pink inner tube or building a sandcastle with Eli. And with the whole crew gathered together, it's not long before someone drags them all into a huge circle and tosses a beach ball into the mix.

While Maki mostly observes at first, it’s hard not to react when the ball speeds towards her. It’s hard not to go with the mood of the group, when a mere few minutes later, they’re all shrieking and diving across the sand, attempting to keep the ball in the air like a bunch of children chasing a balloon at a birthday party. It’s an entirely juvenile pursuit. But when Maki finally joins in, she finds that it's also incredibly fun.

“Quick!” Honoka yells excitedly as it hurtles towards her once again. “Get it, Maki!”

She reacts just in time, and puts her best efforts into sending it hurtling back in the direction it came from just before it hits the ground.

“Good save!” Tsubasa pats her shoulder. She turns and whoops loudly as Erena sends the ball flying high into the air. It’s quite unlike Tsubasa to get so involved in something as silly as this, but she seems to be having fun. Maybe Maki’s not the only one who’s changed lately.

There’s a shout as the ball bounces back over to Maki’s side of their misshapen circle. A few people down, Nico dives for it and misses by a mile, landing almost face-first right in front of Maki. Instinctively, Maki reaches out a hand to help her up, but when her shadow falls across Nico, the other girl looks up and blanches.

“I’m fine!” She hops back up on her feet quickly. The others laugh and call out words of encouragement, and Nico turns to meet them with a grin. She brushes sand carelessly from her body - gathered presumably from a particularly enthusiastic slide across the ground - and Maki’s eyes trail down, completely by accident. Heat spikes in her stomach as she looks away quickly, but not before she notices the light tan of Nico’s skin, the faint sheen of sweat drying in the hot sun. Stupid thoughts. _Dangerous_ thoughts.

As if Nico’s read her mind, she flounces off without a second glance back at Maki, this time positioning herself next to Eli, who’s standing on the other side. It's a brief interaction, but Maki's mortified by how much it makes her pulse race. _It’s just a stupid crush_ , she tells herself, but that doesn’t make things any easier. She watches Nico say something to Eli and throw her head back laughing, and something in her chest just _aches._

Maybe it’s the beautiful location or the fact that she had that whole brief panic where she thought she was in love, but everything Nico does seems infuriatingly adorable. She’s so bright and cheerful, so inconveniently pretty _,_ that it’s basically torture whenever she gets too close. Maki hates how easily she’s drawn towards her smile or her neck or the curve of her hips, even when her own girlfriend is so closeby. It's not like she _wants_ to notice. But her stupid brain won’t stop.

Despite her best intentions, her resolve is weak. Seeing Nico appear earlier in a bikini that flatters her slender figure perfectly with her hair tied up in two cute little buns had sent heat instantly rushing to Maki’s cheeks, and then lower as she'd realized Nico looks much better - much more _real -_ than she did in her dream. She'd dunked herself all the way under the water at that point and briefly considered drowning again. Even now, after recovering from the initial shock, it still keeps catching her off guard.

But that doesn't mean she's not trying. She makes her best effort to get her head back in the game, focusing once again on the people around them.

“Maki!” Someone shouts again, and like before, she hits the ball back just in time. One of the other girls makes a desperate dive, but it lands in the water with a splash. Everyone laughs, and Tsubasa shifts closer to her and wraps an arm around her waist.

“Nice job, babe.” She presses a quick kiss to Maki’s cheek. Surprised, Maki flashes an awkward smile at her, but her eyes dart back towards Nico once more. Maki _feels_ her gaze, but Nico glances away quickly the instant Maki looks her way.

She turns back to Tsubasa, who’s flushed with excitement and a happiness that Maki hasn’t seen on her face in a long time. It’s kind of hard to look at. The guilt weighs down heavily on Maki’s chest.

“Come on,” Maki says, and she grabs Tsubasa’s wrist, guiding her away from the circle of crew members. “Let’s grab some drinks.”

***

The rest of the day goes by in a blur of laughter and warm sunshine. Maki can't remember when she last spent so much time with such a large group of people, but it doesn't bother her as much as she'd expect. It's a lot of fun, plus it leaves her barely any time to be alone with her thoughts, which is definitely a good thing. The party continues at full tilt even as the sun dips below the horizon and they begin moving things back to the house.

She manages to find a brief twenty minutes or so alone to grab a much needed shower, then makes her way back outside. The sky is a deep purple when she emerges out into the evening air, with only traces of blurry reds and oranges in the west that are fast fading away. The tiki torches in the backyard have all been lit, and people are already availing themselves of the fully stocked bar. The smell of grilling meat and vegetables wafts merrily through the air, courtesy of the large barbecue racks that have been set up in the center. As the drinks flow, everyone's spirits seem even higher.

It's a beautiful night and a warm, friendly atmosphere. The air is much cooler now that it's dark - less stuffy and oppressive - and Maki enjoys a variety of interesting conversations with nice people. She sticks by Tsubasa as much as she can, and for a while, she’s simply content, with her stomach full and a cocktail in her hand, to just sit and listen. It’s simply enough to be the girlfriend for once, smiling and nodding along as Tsubasa regales everyone with her charm and wit.

If only they’d stop playing the music so loudly. Maki doesn’t mind it at first, but as the night wears on, the booming bass starts to bother her. She tries to ignore it and concentrate on the people around her, but the more animated everyone else gets, the more Maki finds herself slipping in the opposite direction. As the initial buzz of the alcohol wears off, she starts to deflate.

Maki watches the others playing with handheld fireworks and enjoying drinking games she hasn't thought about since college, and out of nowhere she’s hit with a wave of pure _detachment_. The whole party seems so silly all of a sudden. And that makes her feel so sad. She wants to be like everybody else. She wants to relax and have a good time. Wants to laugh along with the wild story that Honoka's telling.

She notices Nico and Tsubasa talking - too far away from her to overhear - and she feels a sudden rush of paranoia that somehow between them they'll work everything out. Maki's heart rate excels and once again, the weight of the whole situation crushes down on her shoulders. Her skin itches with the urge to escape. She takes several short breaths, trying to quell the uneasiness and utterly failing.

She stands up. It's too much for her. All she wants to do is go back to her room and crawl under the covers. But when she makes a motion to go back inside, she notices through the large windows that other people are already in the living room, drinking and chatting. If she enters now she risks getting dragged into another conversation.

She steals a glance at the others still out in the backyard. Most of them are crowded around the fire pit, listening to some story Honoka's telling. Tsubasa's back is turned, her attention focused on animated tale. No one is watching Maki.

She lingers for half a second, then makes her decision abruptly. She steals off, this time angling herself away from the house. Maybe a walk along the beach and some fresh air will do her good.

Maki lets out a breath. She starts to feel a little calmer as all the voices fade to something softer. She was always like this, even in her days as a student. She’d be having fun with everyone at the party one moment, and feeling completely disconnected the next. There’s always that breaking point, where she just needs some time alone.

With a newfound sense of freedom, she kicks off her sandals, enjoying the way the sand, which has baked all day in the early summer heat, is still mildly warm beneath her bare feet. She shivers a little as the sea breeze whips through her slightly damp hair and walks further from everyone else, towards a small campfire they'd built together earlier, still burning bright upon the beach. The flickering flames bring a welcome warmth when she settles herself down on the sand. She gazes into the orange-red core of the fire, and sits there for who knows how long, just enjoying the peace and quiet. It’s so hypnotic that she doesn’t notice the sound of footsteps behind her until a voice calls out.

“Mind if I join you?”

She whirls around and her breath catches when she sees Nico standing right there, her hair falling in long, loose waves. Out of everyone in the entire beach house, Nico’s the last person she expected to see. Maki _just_ saw her enjoying the party - laughing and chatting excitedly, and now she’s here, looking thoughtful, and maybe even a little nervous. Nico’s barely spoken to her since their makeup session this morning, so why is she here? Why now?

Nico cracks a tentative smile. She waves two cans of beer almost apologetically in Maki’s direction. “I come bearing gifts.” She points her chin at the spot next to Maki, wordlessly asking again for permission to sit down.

Maki knows what she should say. If she insists that she wants to be alone, there's no way that Nico will stay. But when Nico's right there, looking all cute and apprehensive, her smooth skin bathed in moonlight, how can she send her away? Rejoining the party and fixing herself to Tsubasa’s side is objectively the right thing to do, but Maki feels completely overwhelmed just thinking about that option. It's been a long day of avoiding Nico, and Maki’s weakened by how much she wants to just talk to her like everything is normal.

Besides, a few minutes alone together won’t harm either of them. And it won’t be all weird this time, since there’s no face touching or lip puckering involved. Yeah, it’s not a big deal or anything. Maki mostly just accepts Nico’s offer because she’s too exhausted to refuse and make a scene.

“Go for it.” Maki shrugs and gestures at the sand.

“Thanks!” Nico drops down beside her - far enough a way that another person could fit between them, to Maki's relief - and hands over one of the cans. “Ahhh, this is nice! You sure did pick a cozy spot to brood alone in, Maki!”

Maki accepts the alcohol begrudgingly and pops it open, sipping at the foam that bubbles forth. “Who’s brooding? I just wanted some quiet because you guys were so noisy.”

“Ah, so _that’s_ it. I kinda noticed you sneaking away and I-” Nico laughs and it rings out a little nervous. “I just wanted to check you didn’t drown in the ocean or something. You seemed kinda down, so...”

Maki drags her fingers through the sand and she tries not to think too hard about what that _means._ She didn’t think anyone had noticed her slipping away, but Nico did. And not only that… she followed her here. To _check on her_. Maki doesn’t get it. But then she doesn’t really understand anything lately, when it comes to Nico.

“I’m fine.” Maki shrugs and tries to look nonchalant. “I just wanted to be on my own for a minute, that’s all.”

“It is kinda crazy back there.” Nico nods in agreement, then her posture stiffens. “Crap. Wait. A-Am I totally in the way then? Sorry! I’ll head on back if you want.”

It’s the perfect opportunity to end this conversation before it really begins. The perfect chance to avoid being alone with Nico like this. But suddenly, she doesn’t really _want_ to be alone. Maki’s pretty sure that anyone else in the world would annoy the hell out of her right now, but if it’s Nico… if it’s Nico, then she doesn’t mind so much.

“It's fine. Stay.”

Nico bites her lip, hesitating for several seconds, but in the next moment her shoulders relax and she settles herself down, pulling her knees up to her chest. The two of them fall silent, gazing at the flames without another word, alternately sipping at their beers. Neither of them feel the need to make some awkward attempt at conversation. It’s just comfortable. Safe.

Maki cranes her neck upward. It's a wonderfully clear night. She forgot how nice it is to leave the city, to escape to somewhere she can see stars. They twinkle overhead, a thousand times brighter and more beautiful than anything she could see in Tokyo. Out of the corner of her eye, she spots Nico tilting her head up as well.

“It’s so pretty,” Nico murmurs, almost to herself.

Maki finds herself nodding in agreement. “Nothing like it in the city, huh?”

“Total paradise.” Nico smiles as she leans back further, taking in as much as she can of the neverending sky. “We're so lucky to be here!”

“Yeah. I've definitely had worse days at work.”

“God, me too. It’s gonna suck going back to the mall after all this.” Nico laughs, but then she looks quickly behind her, as though she's worried that someone from the Kira Cosmetics headquarters is going to stroll by and overhear. “N-Not that I hate it or anything. You know I'm really grateful for the opportunity! And I always-”

A small smile tugs at Maki's lips as she rests a hand lightly on Nico’s tense arm. “Relax. I'm not gonna judge you for admitting that being in Okinawa is cooler than spending all day in some bright, soulless mall.”

“Soulless?” Nico tugs her arm back, and it’s kind of impressive, the way she manages to cross her arms tightly with her beer still in one hand. “I happen to remember you having a _great_ time there before.”

“That wasn't because of the mall, Nico,” Maki says, softly.

Nico turns her head, and Maki winces. The image of Nico and Tsubasa talking at the party flashes in her mind once more, and she knows she’s got to be more cautious with her words. It’s embarrassing how easily these kinds of things keep slipping from her mouth. It’s just hard not to be honest around Nico.  

If it wasn’t for the rush of color in Nico's cheeks, Maki might have assumed that she didn’t hear at all. Luckily, Nico doesn’t dwell on her slip up. She just draws herself up, and points a stern finger in Maki’s direction. “W-Well, I’m just saying you should appreciate it, that’s all! There are some high quality gifts to be found there, as you know.”

“What are you, the mall mascot?” Maki teases, and Nico huffs. As Maki relaxes back into her position and listens to the sound of the waves against the sand, she finds herself smiling. It’s incredible how much better she feels now, her bad mood from earlier almost completely forgotten. “Today was fun, wasn't it?”

“Uh huh. It was a great way to wrap everything up.” Nico grabs a handful of sand and lets it sift aimlessly back through her fingers. When she speaks again, her voice is low and small. “I'm really gonna miss this, you know. T-The campaign, I mean.”

The heat that rolls through Maki’s body has nothing to do with the fire. Somehow, she knows Nico’s talking about more than the photoshoots. “Well, it’s not over yet,” she says, keeping her tone light. She raises her can in the direction of the ocean. “Why worry about it ending right now?”

Nico’s eyes widen and her mouth drops open just a little in an expression of almost comical surprise. Maki pulls in her arm defensively.

“What?” she asks. “Am I wrong?”

Nico’s lips pull into a smile, but it’s not mocking or smug. It’s pensive. “No,” she answers after a moment. “It just… isn’t really what I expected to hear from _you_ of all people.” She gently nudges Maki’s shoulder with her knuckles. “We’ll make a party animal out of you yet.”

Maki grins back at her. “I’m already a party animal. Or are you forgetting the opera?”

Nico throws her head back and laughs. It’s a carefree, jubilant sound. Maki’s fairly sure she’s never heard anything so genuine in her life. She can’t help but join in. Their laughter echoes out over the waves, carried off by the wind.

“You’re totally right,” Nico agrees, after she finally stops chuckling. She perks up as if she’s just had an idea, and staggers to her feet, brushing off the sand that’s clinging to her calves. Maki watches her in confusion until Nico raises her beer, tilting it towards her. “To Maki. The party animal.”

Maki lifts her arm up to meet Nico’s, modestly pleased by the silly gesture, and they toast. Nico takes a huge swig, complete with a little foam mustache that gets them both giggling again. She collapses back onto the sand, wiping away at her mouth, and sighs happily. Maki notes in the back of her mind that Nico's sitting closer than before. They're not touching or anything, but the distance between them is so small now that if she moved her leg just a mere few more centimeters sideways, she’d be pressed right up against her.

She should move, she knows, but she doesn’t want to shift away from Nico. It feels nice. And it’s not like there’s any danger in sitting like this. Maki’s spent the last two days worrying about getting too close, but now that they’re alone together, she wonders _why._ Right now, all she feels is warm and relaxed.

“You know,” Nico declares, after they’ve spent a few minutes just listening to the waves wash up the shore gently, “this is how it should be. When I’m a famous movie makeup artist, I’m gonna be working in places like this _all_ the time.”

Such a small person, such big dreams. Maki half-closes her eyes and nods. “I believe it,” she says, in complete seriousness. In the past few months, she’s come to believe that Nico can do _anything_ she puts her mind to. She’s nothing if not determined.

Nico, hearing no objections, expands on her potential future eagerly. “I’ll work on all the biggest movies and win awards for best makeup and costume design. And I’ll get to go to like… like England or America and meet a bunch of foreign actresses! And they’ll all want _me_ to work on them.”

Maki snorts into her beer. “That’s pretty far from Japan,” she comments. “Have you even left the country before?”

“Not everyone has doctors for parents,” Nico quips back. “No, no, don't feel bad! Come on, what about you, Ms. Only-Three-Vacation-Houses? If you could go anywhere in the whole world, where would it be?”

“Anywhere?” Maki echoes, grateful for the distraction from her mild guilt at Nico’s admonishment.

“Anywhere!” Nico chirps excitedly. She throws her arms out towards the sky. “There’s a whole universe out there, Maki! Don’t limit your imagination!”

Maki hums thoughtfully. She’s been to a lot of places in her life, first with her parents, then a few times with her friends, and then with Tsubasa. More often than not, she’s enjoyed herself. But now, faced with the question of which place she _most_ wanted to go back to, nothing in particular stand out immediately.

“You first,” she says, to buy herself sometime. “Where would you go?”

“Cheater,” Nico nudges Maki, but she breaks into a grin anyway. “But that's obvious, isn't it? I'd be in Hollywood watching them install my star on the Walk of Fame as the first makeup artist ever to get on there.”

Maki narrows her eyes. Nico had obviously rehearsed beforehand. “You call me a cheater but you had your answer ready,” she grumbles.

“Maybe I did.” Nico smiles angelically and she’s so cute that Maki's heart flips. “But what are you gonna do about it? You still have to answer. Those are the rules.”

“I…” Maki tries again. She thinks back to every vacation she’s ever been on, every beautiful garden, castle, museum, every sun-drenched tourist street and every aquarium suffused with dappled blue light she’s ever seen. She tries to conjure up yearning for the countries she’s yet to visit and all the food she’s never tasted, but she comes up empty again and again. She’s just settled on two possible contenders - that one summer night she’d spent under the starry sky of Paris and a particularly colorful scuba diving trip in Hawaii - when Nico shifts a little and, quite by accident, brushes her knee ever so lightly against Maki’s thigh.

Maki looks up at Nico. The light from the fire plays over her face, dousing it in flickering shadows. A gentle breeze ruffles at her hair. The warmth from that brief moment of contact burns against her skin like the aftermath of a static shock.

The answer finally comes to Maki, all at once. It’s simple, really, now that she thinks about it. All she really has to do is look at Nico, and the rush of warmth that stirs in her chest confirms it. It’s out of her mouth before she can even think about stopping.

“I’d stay here.”

Nico’s eyes widen. “H-Huh?”

Maki places her empty can down on the sand next to Nico's just so she can twist a strand of hair around her finger.

“Even if I could go anywhere in the world right now. I’d still…” Maki takes a breath. “I’d rather be here.”

“O-Oh?” Nico blinks rapidly and a startled half-laugh tumbles from her mouth. “Wow. Guess you must really like the beach!”

It’d be so easy to agree. So easy to explain it all away with the stunning scenery and the stars. A voice in the back of her mind whispers for her to pull back while she still can, while there’s still some hope of salvaging the situation.

But Maki doesn’t want to lie anymore. Not to Nico.

Nico looks at Maki curiously. _Cautiously._ Her teeth skim across her soft, pink lower lip like she's nervous.

There’s only one reason Maki would choose here over anywhere else. And no amount of denial or rationalization will ever change that.

“I don't mean the beach, Nico.”

Nico’s mouth parts softly in surprise, and before Maki can stop herself, she's reaching out. Her fingers trail down Nico’s arm, gently, _slowly_ , until she finds Nico's hand, until their fingers brush together on top of the soft sand.

Her thumb brushes across the ridges of Nico’s knuckles. She's hurtling off a 30-foot drop without a parachute, but despite the danger and the terrible consequences, it feels _right._

“Nico,” she says again, softly. Nico simply looks at her, waiting. She swallows, willing the right words to appear, stumbling over the enormous weight of them. “Do you think - Could we ever-”

She doesn't realize how much she's trembling until Nico touches her back. Her thumb finds Maki's cheek and brushes over it, just once, and it's so delicate and so simple, but it fires up every single nerve in Maki’s body. She wants _more_. She wants Nico closer, until there's no space left between them.

Nico leans towards her, a silent question hanging on the elegant curve of her lips. Her long hair falls forward, near enough to brush against Maki’s skin. It’s her last chance to turn back, but there’s no part of Maki that wants to. She lifts her chin - the tiniest of nods. She wants this. She’s never wanted anything so badly before. The desire beats such a frantic pulse against her chest that she has to close her eyes against it before it consumes her completely. Nico’s breath blows hot against her skin, against her _mouth,_ against her -

 _Boom_.

Maki’s eyes fly open just in time to see Nico leap back. She looks around in startled confusion, just in time to find an explosion of color against the dark, cloudless sky. She hears shrieks of excitement coming from the party back at the house as more and more fireworks shoot up into the air, lighting up the beach around them as clear as day. Under their bright glare, reality seems to ambush them.

Nico scrambles to her feet, a wild, panicked look in her eyes. “I’m so sorry, I- I didn’t mean to-”

Instinctively, Maki reaches out, trying to grasp for Nico’s warmth once more. But Nico backs rapidly out of the way, almost stumbling against the sand.

“I have to go. I have to-”

“Wait. Nico!”

But Nico’s already turning, taking off as fast as her legs can carry her. She practically runs back towards the beach house and Maki can’t do anything but watch. It feels like she’s just been doused with a bucket of ice water, and she shivers against the sudden chill.

It’s a long moment before Maki finally stands up. Every movement feels slow and far away, like she’s in some strange dream. Mechanically, she brushes away the sand from her legs and begins trudging back, following the path of Nico’s footsteps.

She should be horrified by her actions. She crossed the line. She did something terrible and unforgiveable, something she might regret for the rest of her life.

But Maki doesn’t feel guilty. Not one bit.

All she feels is a sort of grim satisfaction, a rebellious flare of hope and acceptance that breathes warmth back into her shellshocked limbs even when the fire is far behind her.

Only one thought remains as she makes her way back to the beach house.

There’s no going back now.


	8. In the Light of Day

**i.**

Nico makes Eli sit with her at the very front of the bus on the way back to the airport. Eli doesn’t complain, but she _does_ look confused, and Nico feels obliged to provide a lame excuse about it being the most comfortable spot or something. The real reason for her sudden interest in the view from the windshield is seated a good eight rows behind them. And even that feels much too close for her liking.

“Thank you all so much for this amazing weekend,” Tsubasa begins after the bus has taken off. Nico’s gaze flicks involuntarily towards the sound of her voice, and she spots her standing grandly in the aisle. “From myself, and of course the star of this campaign, thank you so much.”

Maki's thrusted quite suddenly into the spotlight as Tsubasa tugs her to her feet too. Maki's smile is polite, if not a little forced, and her eyes flit nervously between all the people who are looking expectantly in her direction. When she makes eye contact with Nico, Nico jerks her head back around so quickly her neck cracks. Trying to ignore the pain, she studies the patterns in the fabric of her seat as a distraction from the uncomfortable flip-flopping her stomach is doing.

“This campaign has meant so much to us, and I’m so glad I could share this trip with all of you. Each one of you has been an irreplaceable part of this project…” Tsubasa goes on, her speech full of praise for all the crew members on the bus. It’s supposed to be a feel-good wrap up, and a lot of people are smiling and nodding as they listen.

Each word only drives another stab of guilt into Nico’s heart. She has no right to be here, not when she’s done something so horrible. Memories of the night before keep playing over and over in her head, like a highlight reel of shame she can’t turn off. She still can’t believe she acted so recklessly. She knew better than to seek Maki out, than to leap headfirst into the kind of situation she's been trying to avoid for weeks. She should never have followed her out onto that beach, should never have sat next to her and talked softly with her by the fire, under the light of the moon.

She should never have tried to kiss her.

Now Nico’s pretty sure she can never face Maki again. When they reach the airport, Nico practically flees the group on the flimsy pretense of needing to use the restroom. She slips through security after everyone else has cleared off, and as she paces through one of the overpriced stores in the brightly lit terminal to kill time before boarding, she wonders again just _how_ she could’ve made such a huge mistake.

She’d allowed her heart to delude her. The pretty ocean and their easy conversation had lulled her into a false sense of relaxation, and when Maki had looked at her like _that_ , and said she wanted to stay with _her_ -

Nico shakes the image from her mind as she pretends to inspect some expensive, duty-free perfume. She can’t figure out what Maki could’ve meant. She’s not even sure she wants to. Maki’s _always_ been a mystery to her, ever since Nico first walked into the waiting room outside Tsubasa’s office and saw her sitting there. It’s Nico’s fault for trying to fit Maki into her own narrow ideas about the world. She got everything spectacularly wrong and what was the result, in the end? Almost destroying a perfect and well-established relationship between two of the people she respects most in the world. Some friend she turned out to be.

She doesn’t make her way to the gate until it’s almost time for the plane to take off. Passengers are already lining up to get in, and in the hustle and bustle, it isn’t too difficult to slip into step with Eli and act like nothing’s unusual.

“Where were you?” Eli asks as they hand over their tickets for inspection. “I was worried we'd take off without you. And Maki was looking for you too.”

Nico nearly loses the grip on the handle of her cute travel luggage. “I was checking out the shops,” she mumbles.

Eli quirks her head to one side skeptically, but Nico’s spared any further questions as they’re ushered to their seats. As they make their way down the aisle, she spots Tsubasa and Maki sitting by one of the windows near the front of their section. Nico’s and Eli’s seats are a little too close to them for comfort, and Nico quickly resolves to spend the two and a half hour plane ride feigning sleep.

She _does_ actually manage to doze off for about an hour, despite the swirling storm of her anxieties. She wakes up with a crick in her neck and a raging urge to pee when they’re about halfway back to Tokyo. Nico knew she shouldn’t have chugged the bottle of mineral water the flight attendant handed her. Still groggy, she doesn't waste any time unfastening her seatbelt and squeezing down the narrow aisles to reach the bathrooms at the front of the plane, throwing a stealthy glance at where Tsubasa and Maki are sitting. Maki looks deeply engrossed in looking out the window. Good.

There’s only one person waiting in line, and Nico’s feeling much more comfortable in no time at all. She calculates how long they have left as she fixes her hair in the mirror, wondering lazily if she has time to take advantage of the free, in-flight wifi to post some pictures of first class. She’s already captioning the tweet in her mind when she steps out of the bathroom, only to be arrested by a familiar voice.

“Nico.”

Damn! She’d been too careless. Nico looks up in dread to see Maki waiting outside, tucked away in the little alcove in front of the curtain that leads to the rest of the plane.

“O-Oh hey,” Nico says, forcing a casual smile. She takes a tentative side step closer, so there’s enough room for the person lining up behind her to reach the bathroom. “Stretching your legs, huh? That's nice. I'm just gonna head back-”

“Don't! Just… hear me out. I promise it won't take long.”

Maki look so sweet and so worried, that Nico almost gives in right away. It's hard to resist those eyes, but she's got to be strong. Her mouth has already formed a firm refusal, but when she glances back towards where the others are seated, she spots a large beverage trolley making its way down the aisle at a snail's pace, blocking the route back to her seat. She looks around and realizes with a vague sense of panic that her only other means of escape is at least a 10,000 feet drop, which at this point is looking pretty tempting.

She can't be alone with Maki again. She _just can't_. It makes her too reckless, too stupid. Even now, there's a tiny, terrible part of her that kind of longs to push Maki back against the emergency exit and kiss her until she's breathless. There's a tiny part of her that's deluded enough to think maybe Maki wants that too. And that kind of thinking needs to _stop._

“I think, um…” Maki hesitates, and then nods firmly. “We need to talk about last night.”

Nico looks down at the clouds, because it’s easier than looking at Maki. The idea of plummeting to her death really doesn't seem so bad.

“D-Do we?” She asks, evasively.

“Yeah. We do.” Maki steps forward assertively and Nico backs up so she’s leaning against the folded up flight attendant’s seat, right next to the emergency exit. It's not ideal really, but at least they're out of view from the others here. Nico's been avoiding eye contact with Tsubasa all morning out of fear that she'd take one look at Nico's face and just _know._ And if she saw them speaking in hushed whispers in the corner like this, who knows that assumptions she'd make.

“Nico…” Maki twists her fingers together. “Look. Last night was-”

“Nothing to worry about,” Nico cuts in quickly, firmly ignoring the way Maki flinches. She’d been dreading any confrontation like this, but at least she’s semi-prepared. “It was late. And we'd both been drinking. So… so let's just forget about it, okay?”

Maki's expression darkens. “You can't just pretend like nothing happened.”

Nico leans closer, so her voice is a soft, sharp hiss. “It _didn't_ Maki. You don't need to feel bad about it. It was all me. I made a mistake - a _stupid_ mistake - and I put you in a terrible position and… and I'm so sorry for that. That’s all there is to say.”

“That's not all!” Maki takes a deep breath and when she speaks again her voice is perfectly even, like she's forcing herself to sound calm. “I know now's not exactly a good time. But we need to talk about this. When we're back home we should meet up and-”

“I don't think that's a good idea.”

It hurts to see Maki's face fall. It hurts to have to be so dismissive. But it's for the best. Nico can't do this anymore. She can't push her feelings onto Maki and put her in situations that will undoubtedly compromise her relationship with Tsubasa. She can't be that selfish.

“You can't just avoid me forever-”

When Nico cuts in, it's a shock to hear how cold her own voice sounds. “Go back to your girlfriend, Maki. She's waiting for you.”

She turns away quickly and notices, with great relief, that the drinks trolley is no longer blocking the route back to her seat. She hurries towards Eli, blinking rapidly to stop her eyes from stinging with tears.

It's a good thing that the campaign is over. Because there's no way Nico can ever see Maki again.

***

Nico spends the next few days desperately trying to settle back into her usual routine. She tries to find joy in all the little mundane things, like grocery shopping and her daily commute. She records a video for her YouTube channel for the first time in _months._ She distracts herself to block out everything that's happened recently, because whatever that was, it's over now. It's time to check back into reality. To spend more time with her family and sink all her energy into being the best makeup artist at the mall. She's doing an excellent job, if she says so herself.

So it kind of throws her, when she gets an email asking her to drop by the Kira Cosmetics head office again for some last-minute payroll stuff. Of course, she plans to go. They've neatly worked the appointment in on her day off from the mall so there's no way could refuse, plus, you know, she would quite like to get paid for her efforts. But something about the vague invitation unnerves her, if only because she's never had to pick up a paycheck in person before. She's a little bit terrified of facing Tsubasa when there's a good chance Maki's already told her everything. Nico knows she probably _deserves_ to be fired and banished from the makeup industry forever, but that doesn’t mean she’s looking forward to it. In fact, she’s pretty sure she’ll keel over and die on the spot if she has to talk about what happened face to face with Tsubasa.

Still, she needs to face her demons sometime, so she sends off a reply and finds herself in front of the familiar, tall office building a few days later. The butterflies that flutter in her stomach when she walks through the front door are equal parts fear and excitement. One of the women on the ground floor reception nods at her in recognition and it still feels so crazy that she was briefly part of _all this._ Nico can put the campaign on her resume for the rest of her life, which is totally amazing. She tries to appreciate the chance to be here one last time, silently bidding goodbye to every mirror and chair and chic framed piece of artwork as she makes her way to Tsubasa's office.

Seeing the small waiting area where the whole Maki thing began makes her feel nostalgic and honestly kind of sad. At least, she tells herself, Maki isn't here to make things even harder. Nico pushes the thought aside and smiles as she greets the familiar receptionist.

“I have an appointment with Tsubasa?”

The receptionist consults her little schedule book and nods. It's mostly formality at this point.

“Sure, Nico. She stepped out for a meeting, but she should be back any minute now.”

Nico nods and she drops into one of the usual, fancy waiting chairs lined up against the wall. She examines one of the magazines idly, noticing with appreciation that it's a different issue from when she last came in here. Even the smallest details are attended to, here at Kira Cosmetics. She's just about to find out who her celebrity soulmate is when she's interrupted by the sound of the front door opening. She glances up eagerly, wanting to savor what could possibly be her last in-person meeting with Tsubasa Kira ever.

It takes a moment to realize that it's not Tsubasa.

It's the last person in the world that she wants to see.

The air suddenly seems ten times thinner. Nico nearly wheezes. She shrinks in her chair, praying that in the next two seconds she can magically and spontaneously produce the ability to render herself invisible. She can't believe her terrible luck. What is Maki _doing_ here?

“Is Tsubasa in right now? I need to talk to her.”

Nico lets out a silent breath of relief. It's okay, she still hasn't noticed. She silently discards the magazine and slides herself carefully along to the next chair, as inconspicuously as she can manage. There's got to be a way she can slink out of the waiting area without Maki noticing. In a gigantic building like this, there's got to be a fire escape or an air vent she can flee out of, right? She shifts a little further along the row of chairs, knowing that she has to keep making tiny baby steps towards the door. Nico's watched enough spy movies in her time. She's confident she can totally pull this off.

Out of the corner of her eye, Nico spots the receptionist shift in her seat. “Tsubasa’s running a little late today. I was just telling Nico.”

Nico freezes. She watches in horror as Maki turns her head at an impossibly slow pace. They lock eyes and Nico knows it’s all over. The slightly hysterical part of her brain - the only part that isn’t currently totally overrun with panic - revels in the way Maki’s face runs through an interesting array of colors, going from stark white, then red, before finally settling back to her normal complexion.

“Nico?” Maki still looks mildly stunned, but she collects herself just enough to take a step closer to her, not even bothering to respond to the receptionist.

Nico instinctively shoots up from her chair. “H-Hey, Maki.” She chuckles nervously and begins inching towards the exit. “Wasn’t expecting to see you here! I was, um, just leaving-”

Before Nico can make a break for it, Maki's striding across the room. She plants herself firmly between Nico and the door, cutting her off from any hopes of escape.

“I need to talk to you.”

Up close, it's easy to see that Maki hasn’t been sleeping as much as she should. She's not wearing makeup and her skin has definitely been better and her lilac shirt is kind of crumpled and of course, _of course,_ she still takes Nico's breath away. And that's exactly why Nico can’t be around her. She can barely look her in the eye without trembling in weakness. She has to get out of here immediately.

“Now's not a good time!”

Abandoning what scraps of dignity she has left, Nico makes a desperate attempt to slide past Maki. For a split second, she actually thinks she might even make it after all.

Then a hand latches around her wrist and stops her in her tracks.

Nico’s blood runs cold and hot, all at once. She whirls back around, wide-eyed, and only then does she finally notice Maki’s expression. She looks inexplicably _angry_.

“You’re not going anywhere,” Maki pronounces deliberately. Her eyes narrow, and she tightens her grip. She doesn’t wait for Nico to reply, but instead jerks her head up and looks straight at the receptionist, whose jaw is hanging open.

“Right,” she declares. She marches down the hallway, not letting go of Nico’s wrist. Nico considers digging in her heels, but they’re already making a scene, and besides, Maki’s a lot stronger than her. So she just trails behind her, bewildered.

Maki stops them in front of the door to Tsubasa’s office. Belatedly, the receptionist realizes her intentions and leaps to her feet. “Hey, you can’t go in there right now!"

Maki pulls up short and fixes the poor lady with a glare so withering that Nico’s surprised she doesn’t just turn to stone on the spot.

“I’m borrowing it,” she says, as if that explains everything.

The receptionist hesitates, like the gears are turning in her brain as she weighs the possible consequences. Finally, though, she gives in and sinks back into her seat, muttering some indistinct complaint under her breath. Nico kind of feels sorry for her.

Maki doesn’t stop to celebrate. She twists the handle and a moment later, they’re inside the elegant office. The door swings shut behind them with an ominous click.

Alone with Maki, Nico’s forced to regain some semblance of rationality. She pulls her hand free from Maki's grip and plants both of them firmly on her hips.

“Are you crazy?” she asks. “What's Tsubasa gonna say when she finds out we barged in here?”

Maki shrugs. “I don't care,” she says simply.

“Huh?” Thrown for a moment, Nico can only gape at her.

“I don't care. I need to talk to you. _Privately_. And since you've decided to dodge all my messages, then this is clearly the only chance I'm gonna get.”

Nico splutters at her direct, businesslike demeanor. “I- I wasn’t _dodging_ …”

When Maki crosses her arms, her weak protests fade to nothing. They both know that she’s lying. The clock on the wall marks the silence that follows.

“Why haven’t you been answering me?” Maki asks finally. Her tone is impassive, impossible to read.

“Because... there's not much to say?” Nico tries weakly.

The anger that flares on Maki's face makes Nico flinch.

“Nothing to say?” Maki repeats incredulously. “We almost _kissed,_ Nico.”

“Shhh!” Nico sneaks a panicked glance at the door behind her to check it's closed. She lowers her voice to a loud whisper. “And don't you think that's _why_ I’m not answering?”

A brief flash of something painful flickers across Maki’s face, and it’s obvious how much this whole thing has been hurting her. This isn't what Nico wanted. As cowardly as it is, she just wanted to quietly slip out of Maki’s life forever.

“I… I don't-”

“I _know_ I screwed up, okay? I know I shouldn’t have ever put you in that position. I shouldn't have even gone _near_ you knowing that…” Nico stops herself. She can't say it out loud. Not now, not _ever_. “Look, I know you're mad. And you have every right to be. I crossed the line and - and all I can say is I’m _sorry_.”

Maki blinks several times. And then slowly, her mouth twists into a wry smile. “You think I'm mad about the beach?”

“Well, yeah. I mean-”

“I'm mad because you keep running away.” Maki takes a step closer, and Nico unconsciously shrinks back. “Because you seem to think that if you just ignore my calls and blank my texts then all of this will just magically disappear. But it won't, Nico. Whether you like it or not, this is happening.”

Nico shifts back again and the heel of her shoe hits the wall with a dull _thunk_. Those few extra inches of height that Maki has on her feel magnified somehow. She shrinks back, knowing Maki must be really, _really_ pissed off to approach her so assertively. Nico thought that brief moment on the plane where Maki ambushed her by the emergency exit was bad enough, but at least there were other people around then. Now it's just the two of them. And Nico's literally backed into a corner here, with nowhere to run. As much as she wants to ignore this, she’s kind of out of options.

Nico exhales dejectedly, her shoulders sagging. “I don’t know what you want from me.”

“I want you to stop avoiding me,” Maki says. Reluctantly, Nico lifts her head a little to meet her gaze as she continues. “And stop blaming yourself for what happened on the beach.”

“But it’s _my fault_!” Nico insists, a flicker of frustration rising up inside her. Why doesn’t Maki understand? It's entirely obvious that Nico's the one to blame here. “I forced my feelings on you and-”

“You’re not. _Listening_.” Maki leans in even more, her face mere centimeters away from Nico’s, and it _kills_ her. Maki's so close she can barely breathe. “I left the party because I wanted to be alone. I could’ve told you to leave any time I wanted. But I didn’t. Do you know why?”

Nico shakes her head slowly. It scares her, how badly she wants to know. And how much she doesn’t.

“Because I _wanted_ you to come after me, Nico. You, not anyone else.”

The words hit Nico somewhere deep in her chest, and yet somehow she can’t believe they’re real. The faint buzz of panic in her ears must be affecting her hearing. Because there’s no way that Maki could’ve just said that. No way she could possibly _mean_ that.

“I know how wrong it is,” Maki continues. “And I know it makes me a terrible person. But I wanted it to happen. I wanted to kiss you. And if it hadn't been for those stupid fireworks then…” Maki takes a shaky breath. “Then…”

Nico teeth dig roughly into her bottom lip. There's no doubt about who's the terrible person here. Because hearing Maki say she _wanted_ to kiss her overwhelms Nico with racing thoughts of how easy it would be to grab her shoulders and drag her close and mess things up all over again, for real this time. She can't let Maki say anymore. She _can't_.

“Just- Just hold on a moment.” Nico lifts a shaky hand. Maki pauses and looks at her expectantly, and Nico swallows hard, searching for the right words. “Y-You don’t know what you’re saying-”

Her weak words do nothing to sway Maki. They only seem to make her face harden with determination.

“Don’t you think I’ve thought about this? Do you really think I’m saying all this on some stupid whim? Do you think it makes me feel good that I’ve spent the last few months by Tsubasa’s side, and all I could think of was _you?_ ”

Maki’s voice cracks and she looks like she might cry, and Nico looks down quickly, because there’s a thick lump in her own throat, and this is _exactly_ why she didn’t want to do this. Things are just getting more and more complex. Nico’s not sure if this is a dream or a nightmare, but there’s no way this is actually happening. There’s no way that Maki Nishikino - the person she’s inconveniently and desperately in love with, the girlfriend of her long standing idol - could be standing right in front of her, saying that she feels something for Nico too.

Nico closes her eyes, her head spinning. “This doesn’t make any sense,” she mutters.

“What do you mean?”

“It’s not _right_!” she snaps back, suddenly agitated. Her hands clench, nails digging into her palms as she struggles to put her thoughts into words. “You have _everything!_ Money, family, a girlfriend who loves you - why the hell would you even consider throwing that all away for someone like-”

Someone like Nico.

There's no contest. A rich, charming, beautiful CEO of an internationally known brand or a beauty advisor at the mall. There's no doubt about who would suit Maki best. And that's before even considering that Maki has a whole life already perfectly in place with Tsubasa.

Yeah, Maki's lost it. She must've fallen and hit her head or something. There's no way _anything_ she says can justify her even thinking about choosing Nico over her wonderful life with Tsubasa.

But when she looks at Nico, she doesn't look at all confused. She looks somber and resolved. Troubled, but _sure._

“Things aren’t perfect, Nico,” she says, darkly. “You of all people should know that.”

Images of Maki blinking back tears after fighting with Tsubasa, of her waiting all alone at the restaurant flash in Nico's mind. It’s true that their relationship hasn’t exactly been sunshine and roses, but that proves nothing. Nico’s seen them getting along just as frequently. During the beach trip, for example. They were all lovey-dovey then, so much that every laugh - every _touch_ \- made Nico's chest sting so sharply that she didn't think she'd ever recover. And if Maki had seemed a little distant, well, that was probably due to any number of other reasons. Photoshoot nerves. Nico's lack of self-control, causing all kinds of problems. All of that doesn’t change the fact that she and Tsubasa make an excellent couple.

“No relationship is perfect, Maki. But think of all the good things that’ve happened lately! You just had your anniversary and you've finally finished the campaign. Things just keep getting better and-”

“Nico.” Maki’s voice rings out in the still office, clear and sharp as a bell. She regards Nico with a deadly calm before she speaks again. “We’re breaking up.”

Nico doesn’t process the words at first. All that registers is how the world seems to be compressing, folding inward until all the air is squeezed out of her lungs.

By sheer force of will, she manages to find her voice again. “What…?”

Maki takes a wavering breath, but her tone is firm and determined. “Tsubasa and I... we're breaking up.”

This time, there’s no chance that she’s heard wrong.

“You’re joking, right? Please tell me you’re joking.” But when she looks at Maki, there’s no trace of humor in her expression. An icy stab of panic pierces her heart. “You… you can’t be serious.”

For the first time since they entered the office, Maki finally gives Nico space to breathe. She turns and walks towards Tsubasa's desk, her fingers tracing idly along the rich mahogany when she reaches it. Nico stumbles after her, barely even noticing her own movements.

“ _When_ did this happen?” Nico asks, because she can't help herself. A conflicting desire rises within her. She wants to know everything and nothing at the same time.

Maki turns her head, flinching slightly as she notices something. Nico follows her gaze, and spots what Maki was almost certainly just looking at. A small framed photograph of herself lined up neatly on the desk. If it hurts her to look at, it doesn't show on Maki's face. Her steely expression gives barely anything away.

“We haven't talked yet. But that’s why I came here. To break up with Tsubasa.”

The sheer _wrongness_ of it threatens to overwhelm Nico. She staggers a bit, contemplating the mere possibility. She can't even begin to picture it. It's just wrong - wrong for Maki and Tsubasa to not be together, wrong for Maki to be telling her all this.

Wrong for Nico to hope, deep down in the darkest part of her heart, that it's true.

“You can’t-” Nico begins, because she needs to try to stop this while she still can. But Maki presses onward heedlessly, like she's letting out a flood of words she’s been keeping locked away inside her.

“Things haven't been great for a long time. It was always going to happen. I was unhappy _months_ before I met you - you just helped me figure it out sooner. And I-”

“Maki,” Nico says, cutting in before she has the chance to say something she'll regret. “I get that things are tough. But you can't just throw it all away! As your friend, I forbid it.”

“You don't have that power, Nico. I’ve already made up my mind.”

“But-”

“It's not up for discussion,” Maki interjects, more sharply this time. “We don't have time _._ We need to talk about _this._ About us-”

“There is no _us_ , Maki!” Nico forces out the words harshly, though she's not sure who she's trying to convince more, Maki or herself.

Maki edges in, so close now that Nico can feel her huff out a breath of frustration. “Then _why,_ ” she asks, her voice trembling. “That night on the beach. Why did you-”

“We've been through this!” Nico says, and the words come out shrill and half-delirious. “I-It was late and there was the ocean and the stars and stuff and it was so pretty? It kinda felt like a movie, you know? And I just. I wasn't thinking straight, that’s all! It didn’t _mean_ anything.”

Nico knows how lame her excuses sound, and she's about to reel off something better, but she's distracted by a tremor of Maki's lips. Her violet eyes brim with tears and Nico's chest throbs with an ache she can't shift. Maki looks so completely _disheartened_. And Nico knows it's all her fault.

Maki twists roughly at her hair, coiling strands around her finger, her chest rising and falling visibly as she struggles to control her breathing. Her hands ball into determined fists.

“Well, it meant something to me.”

Nico sucks in a breath, heart pounding so hard she's sure it might burst. She wants so desperately to be honest. She wants to grab Maki by the shoulders and look her right in the eyes and confess that every single moment they've spent together has meant the world to her. But her gaze lands on the framed photo again, on the stack of neatly arranged papers with Tsubasa's name printed across the top.

Her hero. Her _idol_. One of the people she respects most in the world.

She can't waltz in here - after all Tsubasa's done for her - and do something like that in her _own office._

When Tsubasa finally gets in, Nico's sure that Maki will see the two of them side by side and realize that her girlfriend is everything that Nico's not. Nico can't be so foolish. She knows what's right. And she's sure Maki will take one look at them both and immediately come to her senses. She just needs to make her see.

Without thinking, Nico opens her mouth once more, hardly aware of what she's about to say until it's already out. “I think... maybe you’re just a little confused?”

Maki’s brows furrow. “What do you-”

“No, listen, hear me out.” Nico strikes upon a brainwave at last, something that'll explain Maki's bizarre behavior, and she practically laughs with relief. “You’ve had a lot going on. And we’ve been spending a lot of time together. Maybe Tsubasa hasn't exactly been there for you _all_ the time, so you ended up latching onto me! But it doesn’t mean things are _over_ for you and Tsubasa. I'm sure if you just talk to her about it, she'll understand and you two will be right back to normal again!” By the time Nico's finished, she's pretty much even convinced herself. It's kind of funny, how she never saw it before. “You're just _confused_ , Maki,” she adds, beaming, and she's so confident that she's finally found the right answer that she half-expects Maki to agree immediately.

The smile slips off her face when she sees Maki's stony expression. There's no hint that her brilliant deduction has gotten through to her at all. The office is so quiet now, Nico's sure she can hear her own heartbeat. She holds her breath, waiting nervously for Maki to react.

“You really think that,” Maki pronounces finally. It's not a question. Nico hesitates, then nods carefully, and Maki's expression hardens. “You think this is some dumb deluded fantasy that I'm making up because Tsubasa stood me up a few times?”

“T-That's not what I'm saying!” Nico says quickly, her momentary satisfaction fading fast. “I just think it's a possibility _,_ you know? I think maybe… maybe you should think about it a little more before you do something totally crazy.”

Nico didn't think it was possible for Maki to look more furious. Anger flashes behind her eyes, and Nico starts to think maybe Maki's not quite feeling her high-quality analysis of the situation.

“Think about it more?” Maki repeats, raising her voice. “All I've _done_ is think about this! I've been through every possible option, Nico. And trust me, falling in love with _you_ wasn't my first choice. It was my _last._ ”

Nico mouth drops open. She stumbles back a few steps, so delirious that she trips over her own feet in the process, and it's a miracle she doesn't crash to the ground.

“Y-You don't mean that! There's no way you can-”

Maki puts a hand on her arm, warm fingers gripping tight, scorching her skin.

“What do I have to do, Nico?” she asks quietly. “What can I possibly do to prove this is real?”

 _Nothing_ , Nico wants to say. But her treacherous mind alights on a different answer. A furtive, burning desire she’s had for so long that she doesn’t even remember when it started. And maybe Maki’s a mindreader, or maybe it’s written all over Nico’s face. But when Maki’s beautiful, violet eyes widen, Nico’s sure she knows exactly what she’s thinking.

It all happens so fast. Nico faintly registers the smell of shampoo and Maki's stupidly pretty face, so close that her vision blurs and then -

And then the next thing she knows, Maki's kissing her. _Kissing her._ For real this time.

It's an awkward collision at best, but it shocks the breath right out of Nico's lungs, and all she can do is gasp against Maki's mouth. Her eyes flutter closed on impulse - the only part of her body that isn't frozen stiff in surprise - because Maki's _kissing her,_ her dry lips pressed right against Nico's, and it's messy and it's clumsy and it's _electric._ Nico’s never felt anything like it. It takes a good few seconds for her body to react, and by that point, any rational thoughts have fizzled away completely. All she knows is that she’s kissing Maki back, and it feels _good_.

Nico arches closer into the heat of Maki’s body, hard enough to nudge her back against the desk. She almost melts when soft fingers fumble down her arm and take her hand. Nico squeezes back, and she can feel Maki’s pulse, racing just as fast as her own. Every touch, every soft sound, every answering movement of her lips confirms how wrong Nico was before. Maki _wants_ this, and the dizzying rush of that fills Nico’s heart with so much joy that it’s almost more than she can take.

She clings on desperately, her free hand grasping at the soft cotton of Maki’s shirt as her lips part a little, pushing harder in response to the eager pressure of Maki's wet mouth. Nico's waited for so long for this. She's pictured it. _Longed_ for it. Craved it completely, however shameful that might be. For the first time in months, she's _finally_ being honest. And it feels _so good_ to give in.

The relief overwhelms Nico so much that her legs start trembling, that she has to rest her free hand on the desk for support, just to keep herself upright. But her palm doesn’t meet wood like she expects, and when her hand slips a little, she hears paper fluttering to the ground.

Paper from Tsubasa’s desk.

Because they’re in _Tsubasa’s_ _office._

Nico snaps back to reality all at once and she instinctively shoves Maki back, breaking off the kiss. They’re both breathless, panting heavily, and Maki gazes at her, flushed, exhilarated, equally stunned by her own actions. Nico’s lips tingle from the sudden absence of warmth. She’d probably press her fingers against them, just to prove it was real, if her hand wasn’t still intertwined with Maki’s, keeping them locked close together.

“What have you done?” Nico whispers, though the answer is obvious. They’ve done the unthinkable. There’s no way to turn back now, no way to pretend everything is fine. Every secret is now laid bare before them in the hushed stillness of the office.

Maki’s eyes flash and she leans in closer. Nico recoils a little in panic, but Maki doesn’t try to kiss her again. All she does is tighten her grip.

“Tell me it’s the same for you, Nico,” she breathes, her voice husky and low, filled with urgency. “Tell me I’m not the only one.”

Nico swallows, hard. Maki already knows how she feels, she _has_ to. There’s no mistaking a kiss like that. But saying it, _really_ saying it, after all the time she’s spent hiding and denying and suppressing her emotions, fills her with terror. Because saying out loud makes it so much more real. And the reality of all this is so overwhelmingly complicated.

“I…” Nico wills herself to speak, trying to summon back the courage that’s deserted her. She sees the earnestness in Maki’s eyes, the quivering of her lips, and it’s clearer than ever that Maki really, truly is in love with her.

This is it. It's now or never. Nico clears her throat again and takes the plunge. “Maki, I-”

The door to the office flies open with a loud crash.

Startled, Nico and Maki leap guiltily apart. They both turn their heads towards the entrance and see the figure standing in the hallway.

It’s Tsubasa.

It only takes a moment for Tsubasa to absorb the scene before her. Nico watches in a sort of distant horror as her eyes dart from their faces down to their still linked hands, then to the piece of paper lying forgotten on the floor. She takes a step closer, letting the door swing shut behind her.

“What the hell is going on?” she asks quietly.

Maki pales. She glances at Nico uncertainly, clearly incapable of speech. Tsubasa taps her fingers against her tightly crossed arms, her gaze impatient, and it falls to Nico to shuffle forward.

“Tsubasa,” she ventures nervously, not knowing what she’s going to say. “Um, I can explain-”

Tsubasa pivots to face her. Her eyes narrow and it strikes Nico all at once that she’s never seen Tsubasa actually angry before. Not until this moment.

“Haven’t you done enough, Nico?”

The words are a dull knife in Nico’s heart. She stumbles backward as if she’s been struck, and her vision blurs with sudden tears. She’s overwhelmed with a need to run, escape, hide, do anything to get away from Tsubasa’s accusing glare.

Tsubasa is right. She doesn’t belong here. She never did.

Nico pushes away from the desk and rushes for the door, pulling it open. Tsubasa steps aside, making no movement to stop her. From behind her, she can hear Maki shift, calling for her to stop.

“Let her go,” Tsubasa commands, and Nico doesn’t stop to find out if Maki listens. She slips out the office and dashes down the hallway. She ignores the receptionist’s startled gasp, the offended muttering as she pushes roughly past another employee who’s just stepping out of the elevator, carrying a stack of papers. She almost slams into the elevator wall, turning on one heel at the very last second to jam her finger furiously against the button for the first floor.

Her knees finally give way as the doors close, and she sinks to the ground, the tears coming for real now. She covers her eyes with both hands and sobs until her chest hurts, until she can barely breathe. The image of Tsubasa’s face, twisted with betrayal and rage, flashes behind her eyelids again and again. Who knows what kind of pain she’s going through even now, alone with Maki?

It’s all Nico’s fault. She ignored every warning sign. She continued to be selfish, continued her friendship with Maki despite knowing the danger, and now it's cost her everything. And what for? A glimmer of obscene hope, a pitiful indulgence of her selfish wishes, a stolen kiss that was never hers to take.

The elevator pings and Nico scrambles to her feet, choking back sobs and making every effort to avoid glancing at herself in the mirrored wall. She keeps her head down as she charges past people in the lobby, dodging them clumsily and ignoring the way they gawk and stare.

She gasps for breath as she makes it outside, scrambling in her bag for the sunglasses she’s sure are in there somewhere in a vain attempt to cover up her embarrassment. The fresh air doesn't help at all. The enormity of what she's done weighs down on Nico once again, and it take every last bit of her strength to stop herself from collapsing down onto the pavement.

Her career. Tsubasa's respect. Any chance of speaking to Maki again. All gone. And the worst thing is, it's _exactly_ what she deserves.

Nico takes one last look back at the Kira Cosmetics building, her vision blurring with the sharp sting of tears.

Out of all the messy, turbulent, agonizing feelings scrambling inside her, only one thought rings clear.

She can never come back here again.

  
  
  


**ii.**

Maki doesn’t often get to see her girlfriend angry.

Tsubasa’s personality may be strong, but many long years of weaving in and out of the business world have tempered her emotions. She’s always had a high degree of self-control, and her ability to keep a level head despite any annoyance or anger she might be feeling has worked in her favor every time. In their entire relationship, Maki’s only ever made her truly angry twice - once, when she’d called Tsubasa’s entire industry frivolous, and a second time when they’d both been on their periods during a particularly cold winter season.

Tsubasa is angry now.

Maki takes one look at her stricken face and knows that, as much as she wants to, she shouldn’t try to go after Nico right now. She’s hit by a sweeping rush of nausea as she contemplates the severity of the situation in front of her. She’d never meant to hurt Tsubasa, never meant for things to turn out this way. Before they even left Okinawa, Maki had known that she couldn't return to their life together as though everything was normal. That’s why she left for her parents’ house almost immediately after returning from the beach trip, under the false pretense of a family drama she had to go weigh in on. So she could prepare herself for their breakup. Because she wanted to do things _right._ Maki spent days rehearsing, fully intending to do this in the kindest, most mature way she could manage.

But her good intentions failed spectacularly the moment she saw Nico. Just one glimpse of her, and the whole world faded away. She’d been so focused on how it was possibly her very last chance to talk to Nico face-to-face that all thoughts of Tsubasa had gone straight out of her head.

And now things have gone wrong, more wrong than Maki could’ve ever imagined. And she has only herself to blame.

“Tsubasa,” she says, and her voice comes out shaky and practically inaudible. Tsubasa's eyes flick towards her, her gaze so sharp and piercing that Maki physically recoils. “I-I'm so sor-”

“Save your apologies. I don't want to hear them.”

Maki winces. “I… I know I have a lot to explain. Do you want to, uh,” she gestures a shaking hand towards Tsubasa’s office chair. “Do you want to sit down?”

“I want,” Tsubasa enunciates slowly, “to know what the _hell_ you've been doing behind my back. With my _makeup artist_.”

Shame wells up in Maki’s chest. “It wasn’t behind your back,” she protests weakly, conscious of how unconvincing she must sound. “Y-You’ve got it all wrong, Tsubasa, I-”

Tsubasa takes a step forward, losing some of her cool. “How long has this been going on?” she demands, louder now, not pausing for Maki to answer. “Weeks? Months? God, are you two-”

Maki flushes hot as she guesses where Tsubasa’s line of questioning is headed. “Jesus! No! We never- What kind of person do you think I am?”

“I don’t _know_ , Maki!”

A ringing silence follows her outburst. At a loss for how to respond, Maki simply stands there, feeling useless. She watches Tsubasa’s shoulders sag. Suddenly, she seems more weary than Maki’s ever seen her.

“I don’t know,” she repeats, more quietly. She gazes at Maki, her eyes full of hurt and confusion, and Maki’s breath catches in her throat. “I thought I did, but apparently, I was wrong.”

As much as Maki wants to avert her eyes, she forces herself to look at Tsubasa - _really_ look at her. Tsubasa, who she cares deeply about, even if she knows their breakup is inevitable. Tsubasa who she's spent _two years_ of her life with. Her first real girlfriend. Her first love.

Maki’s treated her so cruelly that she can barely stand it. And now she has to try and make things right.

“I never meant for this to happen.” Maki tries not to cringe at how pathetic she sounds. Already drained from what happened with Nico, she barely even knows where to start. “Not like this. I came here to see you today. To talk to _you._ I had no idea that Nico was even going to be here!”

Maki doesn't miss the way Tsubasa’s lip curls at the mere mention of Nico's name. “Really,” she says, flatly. “You just _happened_ to bump into her outside my office?”

“Yes. I know that sounds unbelievable, but-”

“You're damn right it does!” Tsubasa snaps. She draws herself up taller, no slouching shoulders left in sight. Her eyes narrow. “Were you even at your parents’ house? Or did you spend the last two days with _her?_ ”

“I didn’t!”

“I should've known,” Tsubasa mutters angrily to herself, taking short, violent strides as she begins to pace back and forth. “She kept inviting you out. Texting you all the time. And I was stupid enough to think she was just being nice.”

“Tsubasa-”

“I can’t believe I could’ve been so blind. I really thought she cared about the campaign. Turns out, all she wanted was to get in your pants-”

“Tsubasa!”

Unable to take it anymore, Maki reaches out in desperation and grabs Tsubasa’s hand, stopping her in her tracks. Tsubasa whirls on her, her face twisted half in surprise and half in outrage, and Maki knows she needs to speak fast.

“Tsubasa, listen to me. This has nothing to do with Nico, okay? I mean she helped me realize a lot of things, but-” Maki shakes her head. It would be too complicated to explain. “ _Nothing_ happened between us before today, I swear. We hadn’t even spoken since we got off the plane. I didn’t come here to meet her. Why would I? I came here to see _you_.”

Tsubasa scoffs disbelievingly. “Oh yeah? And why is _that_ , Maki?”

Maki stiffens. Here it is. The opening she needs. She wishes to God that she didn’t have to take it.

“Tsubasa.” Her voice cracks as she loosens her grip on the other girl’s fingers, taking them gently as if that will soften the blow. Her throat is tight. She hates this. It's _horrible_. But she has to go through with it, as much as it's going to hurt.

“We have to break up.”

Maki hadn’t known how Tsubasa would react. She’d expected tears, maybe. Anger, for sure. She’d imagined Tsubasa, righteously infuriated and hurt, telling her to get out of her office and never return.

What she _didn’t_ expect is the way Tsubasa’s face just immediately blanks and shuts down. Her expression is so instantly wiped of emotion that it almost seems like an illusion.

Three nearly tangible seconds of utter stillness tick by. Then, Tsubasa’s mouth opens.

“No,” she says simply.

Maki blinks. “What?”

“I said _no_.” Tsubasa jerks her hand away from Maki’s as if it’s a hot wire. “You're being ridiculous. And I don’t want to do this here. Just… go home.” She strides towards the window behind the desk, refusing to look at her. “ _Think_ about what you're saying. We'll talk about this later when you've come to your senses.”

Maki feels a painful twist of sympathy, as she watches Tsubasa glare furiously out at the street below.

“I'm not going to change my mind,” she says, her voice firm. “I’m sorry but… I'm not leaving until you understand. There's no other way, Tsubasa. We _have_ to break up.”

Tsubasa whirls around, her eyes widening, and Maki sees the first flash of some actual emotion.

“Can you hear yourself?” Tsubasa snaps. “You want to break up with me? Because of _Nico?_ You didn’t even like her before. You _hated_ her! And now you want to throw the last two years away to go skipping off into the sunset with her because she's cute and she paid you a tiny bit of attention?”

Maki splutters. “I-It's not like that-”

“Does she know? Do you think she'd still _like you_ if she knew how much you bitched about her? All those hours you spent whining to me about how rude and obnoxious she was?”

“That's-” Maki falters. She's said a lot of things that she's ashamed of. For someone who's supposed to be smart, sometimes she's shocked by her own stupidity. “That was before I got to know her. Things have changed.”

“ _Clearly_. Last week we were happily drinking cocktails at the beach and now-” Tsubasa scoffs in belief and thrusts her arm out wildly. “Now you're leaving me for her.”

Maki exhales slowly. There's so much to explain, and she's already gone through enough emotional turmoil to last her the year. She's _exhausted._ She wants to hide under Tsubasa's desk and pretend none of this is happening. But if Maki's worn out by the heavy weight of all this, then how must _Tsubasa_ feel?

“I’m not leaving you for Nico,” Maki says, as calmly as she can manage. “I know what it looks like. Really, I do. But she’s not the reason I’m doing this. Things haven't been working for a long time, since way before any the campaign even started. We've been pretending everything's fine for so long. And I… I can't do it anymore. We’re just…” She squeezes her eyes shut, the truth ever more excruciating now that she has to say it aloud. “We’re just not good for each other.”

Tsubasa’s expression turns thunderous. “What are you _saying?_ ” she demands, her voice cracking. She holds up one hand and begins listing on her fingers. “I've tried so hard to make this work. When you said you hated my friends, I stopped asking you to come to my parties. When you said you were worried about your family, I did everything I could to make your parents like me. When you said we were spending too much time apart, I made this _whole, stupid campaign for you_. I never stopped trying to make you happy, Maki! Never!”

Maki blinks away the tears that have sprung up in her eyes. She can feel more than ever just how much Tsubasa has done for her, and that makes things so much harder.

“I know,” she chokes out. She does her best to suppress a sob. Now’s not the time to self-pity. She sniffles a little, then looks up at Tsubasa, trying to keep her voice firm. “That’s the problem, Tsubasa.”

Tsubasa gazes at her, uncomprehending, and Maki hesitantly attempts to explain further. “I know how hard you've tried. And I know it doesn’t look like it right now, but I tried too. I really did. We were both doing our best for this relationship, fighting to keep it intact, but -” She inhales deeply, shakily. “But just _trying_ isn’t enough, sometimes. And I- I think the more we tried, the unhappier we both got.”

Tsubasa crosses her arms again, her expression hard. “You’re wrong. You just gave up.” But there’s a defensiveness in her posture, a wavering that Maki can just barely make out. She’s known Tsubasa long enough by now to read between the lines.

“Are you sure?” she asks quietly, in as gentle of a tone as she can manage. “You've never considered it, even once? Never had any doubts?”

Tsubasa doesn’t answer right away, but the way she bites her lower lip is enough. Maki, framing her words carefully, takes advantage of the lull in their argument.

“If… If I thought there was some chance, Tsubasa. If I thought staying would make it work - I would. You’ve done so much for me, and I’m so… so grateful. The last thing I’d ever want to do is hurt you.”

“Then _don’t_ ,” Tsubasa insists. She leans forward, suddenly earnest. “We can still fix this. You don’t have to do this. This is just a - a rough patch.”

Maki shakes her head sadly. “That’s what I kept on telling myself all these months, that we were just going through a rough patch, that things would get better.” Her mind flashes back to all the waiting up, the lonely nights, the stilted and forced conversations they’d have after fights. “That’s why I agreed to be in the campaign in the first place, because I thought that maybe - just maybe - it’d help. But now…” Maki looks down. “Now things are even worse.”

“I don’t get it.” Tsubasa runs her hands through her hair roughly, gripping so hard that she messes up the short style that always falls perfectly into place. “Why didn't you tell me? If you were so unhappy, couldn't you have mentioned it earlier? We could’ve worked it out… The campaign, I wouldn’t have done it if I’d known...”

Maki takes a deep breath. “I did, Tsubasa,” she says quietly. “I tried to. But… you never listened. Not really.”

Tsubasa flinches. She opens her mouth as if to protest, but doesn’t say a word. Maki wonders if she’s thinking back to all the times she pressured Maki into agreeing to things, dismissed her worries, and prioritized her work over their time together.

“And?” she asks quietly, after a pause. “What if, after all this, you still aren’t satisfied? What if you’re never happy, no matter who you’re dating?”

Maki draws herself up taller. She’s considered the possibility many times. Before, she even used it as a reason for staying, because the fear of being alone was stronger than the monotony of their relationship. But she knows different now.

“Then I guess that’s just how it’ll be,” she says simply, feeling the truth of the words as she voices them. “But that doesn’t change my decision _now_.”

Tsubasa goes quiet at that. Her lips tremble, and Maki’s sure she’s going to cry. Indeed, her face crumples and she sinks into the chair behind her desk, as if all the weight of her sadness is too much for her to bear.

But when she looks up at Maki again, her eyes are dry.

“You're serious, aren’t you?” she asks finally. “You’ve already made up your mind.”

“Yeah.” Maki nods, with as much conviction as she can muster. “I have.”

“And nothing I can do or say will stop you.”

Maki hesitates, then inclines her head again. “It’s for the best,” she adds, a bit hollowly.

The last remaining bits of energy seem to leave Tsubasa’s body. She leans her head forward until she’s resting it against her hands, her elbows propped up on the table in front of her. Maki’s never seen her look so defeated. When she speaks again, her voice is low and weary.

“I need some time to think. To… process.”

Maki's heart aches with sympathy, but she doesn’t dare try and comfort her. She’s the last person who could possibly help Tsubasa right now.

“Sure,” she says softly, instead. “I'll - I'll go back to my parents’ house. Take as much time as you need. We can talk when you're ready.”

Tsubasa nods, her face still hidden, and then exhales, shaky and unsure. “Can you do one last thing for me?”

“Of course,” Maki replies instantly, grasping at any opportunity to make this just a little more bearable for the both of them. “Anything.”

“Apologize to my receptionist. And tell her to take the rest of the day off.”

“No problem,” Maki says. She gets that'll be an awkward conversation. But considering she's the one who brought all this drama to Tsubasa's office, it only seems fair. “I… I’ll talk to you later, then.”

Tsubasa doesn’t reply. Maki didn’t expect her to. Her whole body feeling heavy, she turns and makes her way for the door, conscious that this might very well be the last time she’s ever here.

She can’t help but look back just once more, right before she exits the office. Tsubasa cuts a forlorn figure, sitting at the desk by herself, her head still in her hands. Maki sees the way her shoulders shake, and it takes all her willpower not to walk right back in and offer some final apologies, some meaningless words of comfort.

But it’s not Maki’s place to do that anymore. And anything she does will just make it all the more painful and useless. She’s already made her choice. She needs to concentrate on her own future now, and just trust that Tsubasa will get through this with her own strength.

She owes that much to Tsubasa, at least.

And with that in mind, Maki turns once more and steps out of the office, letting the door close behind her.

***

It’s a perfect day.

There’s not a cloud in the bright blue sky, and there’s a light breeze blowing that’s unseasonably refreshing for a July day in Tokyo. In short, it’s prime picnic or hiking weather.

Instead, Maki spends the morning moving the rest of her stuff out of the house she once shared with Tsubasa.

There’s not much, in the end. Maki never thought of herself as much of a minimalist, but as it turns out, most of the stuff in the house had been bought by Tsubasa in the first place. When she arrived, Tsubasa had already gathered most of her personal possessions in just two boxes and a suitcase. It had barely taken any time to move, and it all fit easily into her car. All two years’ worth of her relationship with Tsubasa, packaged away neatly.

Maki steps back and inhales deeply through her nose as she turns to face the house she's lived in for almost a year. It’s a bittersweet sensation, and the memory of how excited she’d been when she’d first moved in flashes in her mind.

“Is that everything?”

Tsubasa appears beside her so suddenly that Maki has to will herself not to jump. When she turns, Tsubasa is standing a polite distance away, regarding the open trunk with a carefully neutral expression. She’s acting so normally that if it weren’t for the arms crossed tightly over her chest, it'd almost seem like Maki was loading up her car for a particularly long camping trip instead of moving out.

“Yep! Looks like it!” Maki’s highly aware of how fake her cheeriness sounds, but she figures it’s best to at least attempt to play along with Tsubasa’s efforts to pretend that everything is fine.

They both gaze at the boxes, a thick awkwardness seeping into the air between them. The driver’s seat is looking more and more inviting by the second, but Maki knows she can’t just hop in and run off without saying a proper goodbye, no matter how badly she wants to.

“Um, thanks again for-” Maki gestures towards her car.

Tsubasa waves her hand dismissively. “Don’t mention it. It’s best to do these things as quickly and painlessly as possible.”

“Yeah,” Maki says softly, and she tries to ignore the sinking guilt that twists in her gut, knowing that in reality, none of this has been painless. “Yeah, it is.”

From the distant look in Tsubasa’s eyes, it’s clear she’s thinking something similar. She clears her throat and shifts, her business-level efficiency slipping right back into place.

“So you’re certain you don’t want to take the piano?”

“I’m sure.” Maki nods. “It’d be a lot of trouble to try move it, and… and you play sometimes too, right?”

“Rarely. Not as much as you.” Tsubasa bites her lip looks back at the house, as though she’s considering going inside to fetch all 500 pounds of it herself. “Are you sure? It’d be quite easy to hire a removal company and-”

“No. Please. Keep it.” Maki insists. If she looks up, she can just about make it out through the gaps in the blinds. She’d be lying if she said it didn’t hurt a bit to let it go - her favourite spot in the whole house, where gentle sunlight always streamed in just right. But there’ll be other pianos. Other houses where she’ll live.

“Keep it,” she says again. “It... looks good by the window.”

Tsubasa considers it, and then concedes. “All right,” she says. “I suppose you won’t have much room for it anyway. Nico told me once that her apartment was smaller than the dressing room down at the studio, so...”

She laughs, a tinkling sound that rings out false, and Maki has to do a double-take.

“Wait. What did you say?” Maki gawks at her in disbelief. “Do you think I’m going to live with _Nico_?”

Tsubasa tilts her head, looking equally surprised. “Well, aren’t you?”

Maki shakes her head forcefully. “No! I’m going back to stay with my parents. Until I can move into my own place. Do you really think I’d go from living with you and jump head-first into...”

She trails off as Tsubasa crosses her arms again, this time a little sheepishly. Of _course_ she would assume something like that. They haven’t discussed Nico since Tsubasa basically caught them kissing in her office. She sighs and looks Tsubasa square in the eye, determined to set the record straight.

“Look,” she says sincerely, “I haven’t talked to Nico since- since you and I last saw her. She probably doesn’t want anything to do with me. So I’m _definitely_ not planning on moving in with her.”

“Oh.” Tsubasa’s shoulders untense fractionally and for the first time that day, a hint of uncertainty flashes across her features. “I just thought-”

“I know.” They both fall into stilted silence once more. Maki’s mildly appalled that Tsubasa’s been picturing her leaping straight into a new relationship, when the reality is that Nico hasn’t contacted her once since the incident.

And why should she? Maki reflects with no small amount of self-directed bitterness. Maki's the one who'd dragged her into Tsubasa’s office and forced a confrontation out of her. A poorly timed confrontation that still makes Maki's cheeks burn with heat and shame, when she thinks about kissing her _right after_ making it perfectly clear that she hadn’t broken up with Tsubasa yet. It's no wonder Nico's ignoring her. She probably thinks she was just being used as a flimsy excuse or a rebound. Maki wouldn’t blame Nico if she never wanted to talk to her again.

It stings, knowing that somehow she's come out of this by hurting two of the most important people in her life, all because of her own selfishness. But Maki can’t think about that right now. Not when there are so many other things that she still needs to sort out. She clears her throat and forces herself to return to the moment at hand.

“I meant what I said, you know,” she says, winding a tight coil of hair around one finger out of habit. “I didn’t break up with you because of Nico. Things were broken long before she showed up.”

Tsubasa's lips press tightly together, but after a moment, she nods. “I see that now. It just… took me awhile to figure out.”

Her wavering tone gives away all the confusion and pain and sleepless nights that have surely made up the majority of the past two weeks for her. Maki wishes with all her heart that she didn’t have to put Tsubasa through that. But she's thankful, at least, that Tsubasa seems to believe her. That she hasn't tried to push too hard, to demand things Maki can't give.

Maki clears her throat, if only to prevent another uncomfortable silence from arising again.

“Anyway,” she says, with a forced briskness, “after everything that’s happened, I doubt she’ll even want to see me again. So don’t worry about it. Really.”

Maki tries to hide the bitter disappointment that seeps into her voice. She tries not to think about how happy she felt before, about all those days she spent with Nico where the smile barely left her face. Tsubasa shifts, her own expression landing somewhere between discomfort and sympathy.

“You love her, don't you,” she says simply.

Maki flinches. Because it’s true. Because it obviously hurts Tsubasa to say it. Because after all the pain Maki’s caused, she doesn’t deserve it.

Maki looks away. She blinks back a sudden surge of tears. “It doesn’t matter,” she replies evasively, after a pause. “It’s too late for all that, anyway.”

“So after all this, you’re just never going to speak to her again?”

Maki shrugs, averting her gaze, and she’s surprised to hear Tsubasa snort. When she quickly looks up again, Tsubasa’s shaking her head. Her lips twitch in amusement. “One thing’s for sure. I’m certainly not going to miss how stubborn you are.”

Maki opens her mouth, puzzled. “No, um. I…”

Tsubasa holds up a hand. “You don’t have to explain yourself to me. Not anymore. I’ll leave all that for you to figure out.” She regards Maki evenly, and while her gaze isn’t exactly warm, it’s still a lot softer than it was before. “Just... do what you think is right, Maki. And be _happy._ I’d like it if you were.”

At that, Maki smiles a little too, the first genuine smile she’s had in what feels like forever. “Thanks. I… I hope you’ll be happy too.”

“Oh, I’ll be fine,” Tsubasa replies heartily. “I’m already sleeping better now you’re not around to hog all the bed covers.”

The bags under Tsubasa’s eyes suggest otherwise, but Maki doesn’t mention it.

“I’m glad to hear it,” she says. She steals one last look at the house before giving her car a meaningful glance. “Well, anyway. I guess I’d better…”

“Yeah.” Tsubasa swallows and stands back, watching Maki open the door. She offers a tight, self-conscious smile as she adds, “Keep in touch?”

It’s a small, conciliatory gesture, but Maki’s grateful for it all the same. “Sure,” she agrees. She reaches into her pocket for her keys. “Just… let me know if you need anything.”

“I will. Oh, and um-” Tsubasa stops mid-sentence and frowns, as if debating something in her mind. She clears her throat and continues, “Send my regards to your parents.”

Maki tries not to think about how strange it is. That their lives were once so intertwined and now they never will be again. She wonders if they can even really stay friends after all this, or if they’ll just end up drifting apart.

“Of course.” She climbs into the driver’s seat and gives one final nod to Tsubasa before closing the door. She turns the key in the ignition and is just about to release the safety brake when she hears a tap on the window. She looks up to see Tsubasa rapping on it urgently with her knuckles. She rolls the window down quickly.

“What? Did you forget something?”

“Yeah, sorry, I-” Tsubasa take a deep breath. “Before you leave, I just wanted to ask you… about the campaign. The makeup campaign.”

Maki’s heart sinks. She’d honestly totally, utterly forgotten about it right up until this point. It occurs to her how, after all this, that it turned out to be nothing but a gigantic waste of time and resources for an already overworked Tsubasa. Just another thing to feel guilty about.

“ _Right_. God. I’m sorry. You worked so hard on it and probably put a lot of money into it and-”

“It’s fine,” Tsubasa interrupts her distractedly. She seems uncharacteristically nervous, like she’s gearing herself up to ask something. Maki’s not sure she wants to know what it is. “Actually, I was thinking… Would it be okay if we still used your images for it?”

The thought of her packages with her face being sold all over the country under the word _Forever_ , especially after breaking up with Tsubasa, makes Maki blanch reflexively. “I don’t know, Tsubasa. I don’t think-”

Tsubasa must see the panic in her eyes, because she hastens to explain herself. “It won’t be the same. We’ll rework the theme and stuff, obviously. I promise it’ll be different.” Maki's tense shoulders ease up, just a little, and Tsubasa continues on. “I won’t do anything without your permission, of course. I just… I think I might have an idea for it."

There’s an earnestness in Tsubasa’s expression that Maki finds hard to ignore, despite her instinct to refuse. It’s unlikely Tsubasa would choose anything in bad taste, and it means that those months in front of the camera won’t have been for nothing, either. She owes Tsubasa a chance, at least. After some deliberation, she finally shrugs in only slightly reluctant acquiescence.

“Sure. I trust you.”

Relief flashes across Tsubasa’s face. “Thank you. That means a lot to me.” She steps back, looking embarrassed. “I’ll let you go now.”

"Yeah. Thanks.” She considers making some pithy comment about how she hopes everything will turn out alright for Tsubasa, but in the end she can’t come up with anything. “Well, uh… better get going then." When Tsubasa nods and turns away, she rolls the window up.

Maki begins to pull out of the driveway, but then she puts her foot on the brakes. Completely on impulse, she opens the window once more.

“Hey, Tsubasa?” she calls, leaning out of it. Tsubasa, halfway up the driveway already, turns her head at the sound of her name. “Thank you. For everything.”

Tsubasa’s eyes widen. For a moment, Maki wonders if she’s only made things worse. Maybe she should’ve just driven off after all.

Maki waits, angled awkwardly out of the window, knowing that there’s nothing more she can say. She just holds Tsubasa’s gaze, hoping that something in her expression will communicate how much she really, truly means it.

Tsubasa doesn't say anything back. She doesn’t smile or frown. She just raises her hand in a small wave of acknowledgement, then turns and walks into the house.

It might not be much.

But somehow, it feels just right.

Maki flicks on the radio as she pulls out of the driveway, almost laughing at how inappropriate the upbeat pop song that blasts out of the speakers is. She leaves the window down and drives a little faster than usual, enjoying the breeze that sifts through her hair.

There are a lot of things she needs to work out. A lot of things she needs to set right. But for the first time in a long time, she allows just a trickle of hope to creep into her chest.

She feels sad, of course she does.

But most of all, she feels _free._


	9. After the Rain

**i.**

“Hurry it up, Yazawa. You’ve got three more appointments today.”

Nico bites back a stinging retort and plasters the fakest smile she can manage on her face. She makes a show of picking up speed on the nails she’s painting, although she goes back to her normal, leisurely strokes as soon as the manager turns away. The customer, who’s been engrossed in some endless, vapid phonecall over her Bluetooth earphones ever since she walked in, doesn’t even notice.

It’s been about two and a half months since Nico started working at this mid-ranged beauty salon. She’d applied on a tip from Nozomi, who’d given her a long, concerned look when she handed her the resignation form for her job at the mall.

“You don’t have to do this, Nico,” she’d said, her voice full of sympathy, but Nico had been adamant.

“No. I do. It’s the right thing to do.” How could she stay, after everything that happened? Her mind had kept flashing back to Tsubasa’s betrayed expression every time she even touched a Kira Cosmetics product. She didn’t deserve to be an employee there any longer.

So Nozomi had given in and pointed her in the direction of some places with openings and after a round of interviews, Nico ended up here.

It’s not so bad. It’s more fast-paced than the mall was, but there are benefits to not working in retail anymore. She's learning new skills practically every day since she's taken up additional hairstyling and nail duties, which come to her easily enough thanks to her natural talent and her beauty school education. It might not be her speciality, but she can get the job done and customers rarely ever complain. It’s good experience for her resume, and the pay is slightly better too.

And even if the hours are longer and some days she doesn't get a break or even five minutes to catch her breath, Nico prefers that. She likes to stay busy. She likes that the salon is different enough from her old job that most of the time, she’s able to push all thoughts of Tsubasa and Maki out of her head.

At this point, that's all she wants. To forget. To move on. To get through a single week without feeling an anxious gnaw of guilt in her stomach when something reminds her of how disastrously things ended.

She knew from the moment she left the office that her only option was to disappear from Maki and Tsubasa's lives completely. And considering she hasn't spoken to either of them since, she's honestly doing a pretty good job. Neither of them have bothered contacting her, which just confirms her suspicions of how badly she’s ruined things. She wishes she could apologize somehow, especially to Tsubasa, but it would only be for her own peace of mind.

And that’s not something she deserves.

So she puts her head down and keeps working hard, even though she doesn’t exactly love her new job. With her dreams of fame dashed by her own failures, the only thing she wants to do now is carve out her own small niche in this secluded corner of Tokyo and let the rest of the world fade away. Which starts and ends with making sure her customers are decently satisfied with her service and skills, so with a renewed sense of vigor, she waves off one customer and throws herself right into the next appointment in her busy schedule.

Bells jangle as the front door opens, but Nico doesn’t bother looking up at first. She’s too busy clipping hair into place and teasing strands into curls, and besides, whoever’s at the desk can deal with it. An emphatic exclamation from her manager, however, shatters her concentration.

“Tsubasa Kira? What- What an honor!”

Nico stiffens with terror and her head shoots up immediately. It can’t be. There’s no way Tsubasa could be here-

She catches sight of short, bobbed hair and flashing green eyes and turns cold. There’s no mistaking that sharp, angled face. Somehow, despite the impossible odds, Tsubasa Kira is at her salon.

Any hope that this is some sort of freak coincidence disappears when Tsubasa scans the room and spots her. For a moment, they just stare at each other. Then, she turns her attention to the manager, who’s busy fawning over her, and activates her usual charm.

“The pleasure is all mine,” she says graciously. “I’ve heard great things about your salon and wanted to take a look for myself. I know it’s terribly last-minute, but could you squeeze me in for a little manicure?"

Nico tries to push down the panic that's rising in her chest and studiously averts her gaze. She knows as well as anyone that they’re fully booked for the day. Tsubasa will have to come back another time, at which point Nico will be long gone and -

“It’s no problem at _all_ ,” simpers the manager. Nico’s underestimated his penchant for sucking up. He bows obsequiously and Nico has to fight the urge to gag. “We’ll free up our very best nail artist for you immediately. I’ll go get him now-”

"Actually," Tsubasa cuts in, smiling, “that’s very kind of you, but I already have someone in mind.” The salon falls silent, and Tsubasa's voice echoes clearly across the room. "Is Nico Yazawa available at the moment?"

Nico's hand slips. She hisses as she catches herself with the curling iron and only narrowly avoids scorching her whole hand.

"Yazawa?" Normally, Nico would be offended by her manager’s incredulous tone, but right now she’s just praying that he’ll be too snobby to bring her over. "But… um. She's still quite new here. Are you sure you wouldn't like to see someone with a little more… _experience?"_

From the corner of her eye, Nico spots Tsubasa shaking her head. "I'm familiar with her work, and I'd say she has more than enough experience. But please, don't let me inconvenience you. I could always come back another day-"

"No!" He leans over the desk, all but throwing himself at Tsubasa's feet. "Please. We can definitely fit you in. In fact, I’ll call her over right now. Yazawa!”

Nico cringes and looks up reluctantly, and her manager beckons her over with a sharp hand gesture. Desperately, she points at her oblivious customer’s head and brandishes the iron, mouthing, _I’m busy!_ But the manager just makes an impatient chopping motion, clearly indicating that Tsubasa takes priority over anyone else.

Nico sighs. There’s no way out of this one.

“Excuse me just a moment,” Nico says in her best customer service voice. She clicks off the curler and replaces it gingerly on the cart beside her before making her way towards the front desk. It feels like she’s a criminal, taking her last, lumbering steps towards the gallows awaiting her.

But although it's thoroughly tempting to push a nearby styling trolley across the salon as a distraction and make a run for it, Nico knows she has to be mature about this. She's not sure what the social etiquette is for bumping into an ex-boss after you've thoroughly betrayed them and kind of made out with their girlfriend, but she’s not about to make a scene right in the middle of her workplace.

"Yazawa," her manager says loudly when she approaches, “this is Tsubasa Kira.” As if Nico needs an introduction. “You’re going to be taking care of her today.” He lowers his voice and leans in so that Tsubasa can’t hear him. “Don’t fuck this up.”

Nico flashes Tsubasa a grim approximation of a smile and ducks behind the counter, pulling the manager down beside her. “What about my other customer?” Nico hisses at him, still looking for a way out of this mess. “And the other appointments for today?”

“Don’t be stupid, someone else will handle them.” He jabs a finger at her, just missing her nose. “Just give her anything she needs. And don’t you dare annoy her. I’ll be watching.”

He straightens up, ending the conversation before Nico can try and find another excuse, and all she can do is follow suit. She turns to Tsubasa, her smile fixed and her hands trembling, and says the only thing that comes to mind.

"Right this way please. Can I get you a drink before we start?"

She leads Tsubasa to the nail bar, conscious of how everyone else in the salon turns to watch them pass. When Nico makes eye contact with one of her co-workers, she clearly looks envious. If only she knew that Nico would give anything to exchange places with her.

Soon they’re seated across from each other, and Tsubasa still hasn’t said a word. Sitting so close to her makes Nico's stomach twist into knots. She can't look her in the eye. She's so nervous she can barely stay upright. In fact, the only thing stopping Nico from throwing herself to floor and spontaneously erupting into apologies is the fact that her manager is hovering nearby. Thankfully, no one else is scheduled for a manicure right now, so at least they’re mostly out of earshot from the rest of the salon.

"Uh. So." Nico fumbles for the treatment catalogue. She clears her throat, and when she speaks again, her voice is customer service chirpy. "We offer a great range of styles and colors, to suit every personality and budget! Please take a look and let me know if anything jumps out to you. U-Unless you already have something in mind?"

Tsubasa glances down at the catalogue, and then up to meet Nico's gaze. "You already know what I'm here for, don't you Nico?"

Nico's stomach drops. Oh God. Here it is. They're really doing this in front of everyone and Nico absolutely deserves it. She braces herself, waiting for Tsubasa to deliver a devastating indictment of her crimes.

But all she does is hold out her hands, showcasing her plain, unpolished nails.

"A French manicure," Tsubasa says pleasantly, her tone so light that Nico stares at her, completely dumbstruck. "A little predictable, I know. But you remember how I like them, right?"

Nico frowns for a second, but then it comes back to her. She'd complimented Tsubasa on her perfect manicure a couple of times, back when they were working together. But if Tsubasa really just wanted her nails done, surely she has dozens of more experienced people on hand, just waiting to jump at the opportunity. Why did she come _here_? None of this makes any sense, but it’s not like she can just ask Tsubasa to explain.

For now, all she can do is agree. "Sure," she says quickly. "J-Just leave it to me!"

Tsubasa extends her delicate fingers onto the table, and Nico prays that her own hands don't feel all gross and sweaty. A heavy silence quickly descends as Nico begins filing her nails. Her jittery hands tremble against Tsubasa’s cool skin, and Nico knows she must be able to feel it. Tsubasa, for her part, seems perfectly poised, with her back straight and her muscles loose, although Nico doesn’t have the nerve to look up at her face directly.

Nico, on the other hand, is a nervous wreck. She knows her manager must be sending her death glares, willing her to make small talk, but she just doesn’t know what to say. She listens to the faint sound of her coworkers, chatting away idly to customers about their jobs and their daughters and their neighbour's dogs and wishes she could just act normal. Somehow, she manages to file every nail into shape without uttering a single word.

Throughout her whole career, there’s only one other person that’s ever made her feel so speechless. And _she’s_ at least part of the reason why Nico’s in this mess in the first place.

“I looked for you, you know,” Tsubasa says, so suddenly that Nico's head jerks up.

"You did?" Nico squeaks.

Tsubasa nods. "I went to the store where we first met, but the manager there - Nozomi, was it? - told me you'd left more than a month ago. Of course, it wasn't much work to find you after. Your information was all in our files." She shrugs daintily, a small smile crossing her lips. "Perks of being the CEO."

Half a year ago, hearing that Tsubasa Kira herself was personally running around trying to track her down would've filled Nico with an indescribable euphoria. Now, she just swallows nervously.

“W-Why?” she manages to ask. She doesn’t want to know the answer, but she can’t avoid the question.

Tsubasa doesn’t reply right away. She just smiles enigmatically and abruptly changes the subject.

“Maki and I broke up. Did you know?”

By sheer force of habit, Nico manages not to drop the cuticle pusher. Whatever Nico expected her to say, it sure as hell wasn't _that._ It's clear that this conversation is going to be conducted entirely on Tsubasa’s terms.

"Oh. I, uh. Well, when I didn’t see the new makeup line, I kinda assumed-" Nico stumbles over her words too much to even finish her sentence. She was never _sure._ And the vague comments she’d heard in passing from Nozomi, who’d heard it from Eli, were never conclusive. "But I didn't know if-"

If it was real. If it was temporary. If they'd work things out and get back together.

"Ah," Tsubasa nods, as though Nico's babbling makes perfect sense. "Well, it happened. Right after you left my office, in fact."

This time, Nico really does drop the cuticle pusher. She snaps to attention. It’s the most direct reference to their last meeting so far, and all at once the memories she’s been trying so hard to repress come flooding back. She thinks back to the look on Tsubasa’s face when she’d walked in on her and Maki and the guilt is almost enough to make her sick. Before she even has time to think, everything Nico wants to say to Tsubasa comes racing out at once.

"I'm - I'm so sorry! I never meant to get between you and Maki, and I never expected things to turn out this way, and you have every right to be mad at me for ruining your relationship, and god I'm just- just so _sorry_ -”

“Nico.” Tsubasa raises a slender hand, stopping her tirade. To Nico’s surprise and utter confusion, there’s a hint of amusement in her graceful features. “I promise I’m not here to yell at you. I just wanted to talk.” She stretches out her arm across the bar once more. “Shall we continue?”

Nico hesitates, unable to wrap her head around Tsubasa’s actions. After the endless weeks of torment since she left the office, it seems practically inconceivable that Tsubasa could be anything less than furious at her. But she’s smiling now, in a manner that’s clearly meant to be reassuring. And even if that makes no sense, Nico's only option is to go with it.

She selects a nail polish that's the ideal shade and starts applying it as a base coat. Though her eyes are cast down at the table, Nico can practically _feel_ Tsubasa carefully considering her next words. The air feels heavy. And all Nico can do is wait.

“I’ll admit,” Tsubasa pronounces, after Nico’s about halfway done with one hand, “that I was angry at first. I mean, can you blame me? I _did_ walk in on you and Maki practically making out in my own office. Not exactly the best workday I’ve ever had.” She chuckles darkly. Nico fights the urge to offer another grovelling apology.

“Even after Maki explained things, I couldn’t stop blaming you. I’d taken a big risk hiring you, and honestly, I was hurt. I just kept on thinking that if it weren’t for you, Maki and I would still be together.”

Nico flinches. Of course, she always knew as much, but that doesn't make it any less painful to hear.

“But I’ve gained some perspective over these last few months. And I realized that things between Maki and me were already fragile, long before you arrived. I mean,” she adds, laughing a little, “I was desperate enough to create a whole makeup campaign to try ‘fix’ our relationship. Pretty pathetic, in hindsight.”

It's such a shock to hear Tsubasa speak so poorly of herself that Nico has to stop what she’s doing and look up. “That’s not true,” she protests weakly. “You were just… trying your best…”

Tsubasa lets out an ambiguous hum and chooses not to argue. “Well anyway, the more I thought about it, the more I understood that I was just searching for excuses instead of dealing with my problems. That the only way I’d really get closure is if I confronted them once and for all.”

Her back straightens as she takes a deep breath, and she looks straight into Nico’s eyes. Nico braces herself, sensing that Tsubasa’s gearing up towards something big.

“That’s why I’m here today, Nico.” She clears her throat. “To tell you that I don’t blame you for what happened. I’ve made my peace with it, and I wanted to make sure you know that I don’t hold a grudge against you. That’s all.”

With that, Tsubasa stops talking and gazes at Nico expectantly. She’s clearly finished with what she has to say, but for a moment, all Nico can do is gape at her.

“I-I don’t understand,” she stammers. Her brain is about three seconds away from short-circuiting. Tsubasa blinks at her patiently, waiting for her to continue, and Nico attempts to organize her thoughts. “The way I acted was totally unprofessional, _especially_ after everything you’d done for me. You have every right to be angry. If I were you, I’d totally hate me. And instead you’re being so nice to me and… and I don’t deserve it.”

Tsubasa tilts her head to one side. “You always were one for shouldering more responsibility than you needed to."

Nico shakes her head. “If I hadn’t been there,” she insists, “you and Maki might not have broken up - or at least you would’ve lasted longer-”

“Maybe,” Tsubasa agrees distantly, then gives a small, sad smile. “But do you think we would’ve been happy?”

Nico opens her mouth, then closes it. Honestly, the answer is no. In hindsight, it never took a genius to see that Tsubasa and Maki’s relationship was on the rocks.

When Nico's unable to respond, Tsubasa presses on, as if she’s proved a point. “You didn’t cause the problems between me and Maki, Nico. Maybe you made them a bit more complicated, sure, but we all played a part in what happened. Maki and I were always going to break up, with or without you. And that’s the truth. It wasn’t your fault.”

Nico’s eyes water as a wave of emotion washes over her. She didn’t know until now, how long she’s needed to hear those exact words. She’s spent the past few months trying to repress and forget everything that happened, but deep down inside, she’s never been able to get over the idea that she was the sole person responsible for causing so much grief to Tsubasa. Hearing she’s not to blame, from Tsubasa’s own lips, lifts a weight that she didn’t even know she’d been nursing.

She wipes the back of her hand across her eyes, rubbing away a stray tear. Tsubasa, tactful as always, doesn’t comment or interrupt. She just averts her gaze politely, letting Nico take her time to collect herself.

Eventually, Nico sniffles one last time and swallows hard.

“I-I’m sorry that it didn’t work out,” she says softly. “Really, Tsubasa. I am.”

Tsubasa inclines her head, acknowledging the final, underlying apology. “I am too.” She pauses. “But we can’t just dwell on the past forever. I need to move on from that point in my life, and you… you need to stop being so hard on yourself. I think clearing the air between us should help.”

Nico nods. “It _does_ help,” she confirms, and offers a tentative smile, which Tsubasa returns. The two of them sit for a few seconds of silence, the mood so much lighter than when Tsubasa first walked in. Funnily enough, Nico feels closer to her now than she had throughout the entire makeup campaign.

Abruptly, Tsubasa wiggles her fingers. “Well. Now that that’s over” she says, winking, “I believe you owe me a manicure?”

Nico lets out a watery laugh and gets to work, more confidently than before. She finishes up applying the base paint on the rest of Tsubasa’s nails, and when she starts on the white tips, her hands are no longer shaking.

“So…” she ventures, as she carefully arranges the stencils. “How are- How are you doing? Otherwise, I mean?” It’s a bit awkward, but now that they’ve made up, she figures a bit of small talk can do no harm.

Tsubasa takes to the topic easily. “Quite well, actually. We’re reaching quite a busy season of the year, what with Christmas sales starting in a couple of months, so we’re hard at work trying to expand our inventory.”

A bit of the old excitement flares up in Nico’s chest. She’s still a huge fan of Kira Cosmetics, after all. “That’s _so_ nice to hear!” she can’t help but exclaim. “Please tell me you’re bringing back the Christmas themed selection box? They sold out _so quickly_ last year!”

“I couldn’t possibly say,” Tsubasa says, her eyes twinkling. Nico feels certain that whatever her plans, they’ll be better than ever. “So how about you, Nico? Are you enjoying working here?”

“Well…” Nico decides that Tsubasa doesn’t need to hear about how the manager is a control freak or how the customers are usually annoying and settles on something more neutral. “It’s a job. That’s what’s important.”

“I see…” Tsubasa falls into a contemplative silence. In the meantime, Nico puts the finishing touches on the manicure and begins prepping for the drying. With every step of the routine she completes, she feels more and more like her usual self. Sure, things were nerve-wracking at first, but things have already turned out way better than she ever expected! And Tsubasa doesn’t hate her! It’s basically a dream come true. She’s just gearing up towards trying to pry a teeny little teaser about the Christmas makeup palette, when Tsubasa speaks again.

“So I have to ask…” she begins slowly, and Nico doesn’t miss how careful she’s being. “Have you spoken to Maki lately?”

Nico freezes, her grip tightening on the cap of the nail polish she’s clearing away. Instantly, all her anxiety comes flooding back. She really doesn’t want to discuss Maki, especially not with Tsubasa. But at least she can be honest this time. With equal caution, she answers.

“Uh... No. Not for a while now.”

“Not since…” Tsubasa hesitates, tactful as always. “Not since that day in my office?”

Nico’s eyes widen. “H-How did you-”

“I had my suspicions.” Tsubasa exhales softly, then waves a hand through the air in a dismissive motion. “Well. We all have to move on from these things. And if you’re happier not speaking then that’s obviously for the best.”

“That’s not- Um. I-It’s more like-” Nico interjects before she can stop herself, regretting it as soon as Tsubasa looks at her expectantly. “I don’t think Maki wants to speak to me. So… So that’s why-”

Tsubasa’s eyebrows raise slightly. “What makes you say that?”

Nico can think of a dozen reasons why. Her mind flashes back to waiting by her phone for Maki to text or call, the long months of silence, the fact that she had to learn secondhand that Maki had broken up with Tsubasa. She makes every effort to keep her voice light and her hand steady.

"Oh, just that, um. You know." Nico feels herself flushing as she tries to find the words to explain. "Maki hasn't exactly dropped by for a last minute manicure."

Tsubasa gives a tinkling laugh, and there's something almost fond about her expression. "Well, she's not really the type to go out and… get her nails done."

"Yeah!" Nico nods intently. "I know that! And I never expected her to! But-" She takes a breath, her voice softening. "But that's why I know she must be over all this. She hasn’t even tried to call so… so I'm _sure_ she's put the whole thing behind her. And, like, why wouldn't she, you know? I totally get it."

“Is that so," muses Tsubasa. For some reason, she sounds a bit amused. She affects a yawn that Nico would swear was fake if she didn’t know any better, and rolls her shoulders. “That’s too bad. You know, I always thought she looked so much happier and full of life when she was hanging out with you.”

Nico’s eyes widen. She darts a quick look at Tsubasa, wondering if she’s heard wrong, but Tsubasa’s expression is nonchalant, as if she hasn’t just dropped a bombshell on Nico’s head. Maki? Happy with her? Just what the hell is Tsubasa implying?

"Do you really think that she..." Nico struggles to find a casual way of phrasing it, something that won’t sound like she’s reading too much into things. "Y-You don't think she's just… written salons off for good?"

Tsubasa just hums, with an air of contemplative mystery that's enough to rival even Nozomi. "Who can say."

"But-" Nico's head is spinning. "But I thought-"

Tsubasa shakes her head, her smile polite, but firm. "It's not really something I can speculate on. And I’m not interested in discussing this any further. But if you were to make any…” Her mouth twists to the side as she pauses to think. “Any... _appointment enquiries_ in the future, then it certainly wouldn't be my place to stop you."

Nico's mouth drops promptly open. Her heart races at at least five times its usual pace. Tsubasa couldn’t _possibly_ be saying…

“Are you telling me I should-”

"Oh, I think they’re dry now.” Tsubasa cuts her off. She inspects her nails briefly, then nods. “That went by much faster than I expected. It helps to talk, doesn't it? Well done, Nico. They look good.” She gives Nico a pointed glance, and Nico knows that the conversation is over.

Nico's mostly in a daze as she leads Tsubasa towards the counter to pay. She fumbles as she takes the payment, thankful that her manager hasn't come rushing back over to intervene yet.

"I hope you're happy with your Mak-uh! _Manicure_." Nico forces a smile, hoping her embarrassing slip of the tongue went unnoticed. She can't focus. Her mind's all all over the place.

If Tsubasa heard, her smile gives little away. "I am. This is exactly what I wanted."

Nico's not sure if she's talking about the conversation or the manicure, but either way, it's a relief to hear it. She exhales deeply as Tsubasa heads towards the doorway.

“Oh, that’s right. I almost forgot.” Tsubasa turns on her heel suddenly, as if she’s just remembered something. The movement is too practiced and calculated to be unplanned. Nico wonders what else Tsubasa could possibly have to show her as she strides back over to the front desk. She rummages around in her bag, being careful of her nails, and finally pulls out a weighty manila envelope.

“I wanted to show you this,” she says, sliding over the package. She catches Nico’s apprehensive glance and raises her eyebrows. “Go on, open it.”

Nico reaches into the envelope and pulls out a familiar, glossy magazine. It’s just a makeup brochure, but one look is all it takes for Nico to freeze up in shock.

“Our newest line. I thought you might appreciate it.” By the sound of Tsubasa’s voice, she’s clearly enjoying Nico’s reaction. Nico can’t even bring herself to reply right away because she’s too dumbfounded.

Maki’s face peers out from the cover of the catalogue.

And as much as it hurts to see her, looking so carefree and so beautiful, the rest of the cover is even more distracting.

It’s the campaign - only it isn’t. Nico flips through the pages mechanically, taking in the pictures one by one. They’re all the same, for the most part, but touched up to look lighter, less edgy. The brochure itself is printed on a glossy, white background instead of the original black.

That isn't what Nico focuses on, though. There's another major difference that grabs her attention and holds her captivated. She turns back to the cover, hardly able to believe her eyes.

The design isn’t too much different from the prototype Tsubasa had showed her and Maki all those months ago, before the trip to Okinawa. But where the title had once spelled out “Forever” in large, bold letters, there was now a new word in its place.

“Freedom,” Tsubasa reads off calmly, also looking at the cover. “The Freedom to go anywhere,” she adds in an almost sing-song tone. “At least, that’s the tagline, anyway. What do you think?”

Nico’s unable to answer immediately. She just keeps staring.

Thematically, it makes sense. The new line is supposed to emphasize how resilient the makeup is, so the word “freedom” definitely evokes the image of being able to go anywhere or do anything without your mascara smearing. The angle is simple and effective.

For Nico, though, it’s more than just some clever marketing. And when she sees the careful, controlled expression on Tsubasa’s face, she knows it’s the same for her too.

“I wasn’t sure at first,” Tsubasa says lightly, when Nico remains quiet. “Actually, I wanted to pull the whole campaign. But the more I thought about it… It just felt right. I asked Maki for her blessing, of course. She approved.”

That breaks the spell Nico’s under. “It’s great,” she says quickly. She swallows past the lump forming in her throat. She can only guess how much heartbreak and healing Tsubasa had to go through to get to this point. “It’s really… I think it’s going to do really well.”

Her words are totally inadequate for expressing the gratitude that rushes through her body, but Tsubasa seems to understand. She nods and smiles a little.

“I'm pleased to hear that.”

They share a few comfortable seconds of silence, allowing the sounds of the salon to filter through to them. Out of the corner of her eye, Nico spots the manager doing what resembles a very strange dance. She belatedly recognizes that he’s shuffling back and forth, presumably debating on whether to step in and begin flattering Tsubasa once more.

Tsubasa grins as she spots him too. “Well,” she says loudly, making a point of checking her watch, “I suppose I should be heading off.”

Nico jumps to attention. “Oh, let me see you out.” She hurries over to open the door for Tsubasa, before the manager can come rushing over. Tsubasa inclines her head in thanks.

They linger a bit longer once they both step outside, the fading afternoon sun reflecting off the glass door.

“Thank you for coming by,” Nico says, hoping Tsubasa can hear how sincere she is.

“It was my pleasure,” Tsubasa replies breezily. She examines her nails once more, with an air of satisfaction. “They turned out quite well. Oh, which reminds me…”

Her hand reaches into her bag yet again. Nico wonders vaguely what other kind of surprise Tsubasa has planned for her. After everything that’s happened, she half-expects her to pull out a cardboard cutout of Maki or something.

But Tsubasa’s next move is nothing so extravagant. She simply takes out a small card holder. She sifts through it, settling on a small, plain business card with a name Nico doesn’t recognize.

“A friend of mine,” Tsubasa says. “From a local TV studio. I’m not sure if she has any job openings right now, but she’s often looking for qualified makeup artists.” She winks and leans in a bit closer, lowering a voice. “You’re too good for this place. No offense. I’d just hate for you to waste your potential.”

Speechless, Nico accepts the card and tucks it delicately into her pocket. It’s hard not to think back to all those months ago, when Tsubasa first handed her a business card. Even after everything that’s happened, she’s still looking out for Nico.

“Maki’s crazy for breaking up with you,” she blurts out, before she can even think about it. Tsubasa’s eyebrows shoot up and Nico winces. “Sorry, I mean- That came out wrong-”

To her relief, Tsubasa just chuckles. “Maki’s her own person,” she answers amusedly. “But that's kind of you to say. And now,” she adds, stepping away, “I really do need to get going. Take care of yourself, all right?”

“You too,” Nico says, still brimming with unspoken appreciation. Her fingers toy with the edges of business card, still tucked in her pocket. “Thank you.”

Tsubasa smiles. And then she turns away.

Nico’s not even sure what to feel as she watches her small figure weave into the crowd. When she woke up this morning, she was firm in her belief that nothing would ever change. And now… now one little conversation has left her questioning everything.

Her heart pounds hard with the thrum of possibility. With thoughts and desires she'd locked firmly away, with a brief flicker of hope that she'd thought had been extinguished forever.

It’s silly, really. In fact, it’s completely ridiculous. It’s been so long, any chance she ever had is probably long past. But she thinks back to the cover of the catalogue, to its new name, and her heart lurches. It’s enough. That image alone is enough to make her kind of want to do something crazy.

It’s a risk. There’s no guarantee she’ll even get an answer. But despite the huge potential for more tears and heartbreak, she still has to find out.

Nico pulls out her phone. She opens up her contacts and taps on a name she’s spent the last three months trying to forget, then begins typing in the message box.

_I need to talk to you._

She hits send. 

 

 

**ii.**

Maki is running late.

Grimacing, she presses her foot down on the gas pedal, blasting through the intersection milliseconds before the light goes from yellow to red. Not exactly the picture of safe driving, but right now, she’s more worried about the seconds ticking by on her watch.

This isn’t something she plans on missing.

She'd woken up way earlier than she needed to. She and Nico had agreed to meet in the late afternoon, but nerves had kept her tossing her and turning in a fitful slumber that she gave up on as soon as the sun rose. After making a perfunctory effort to clean around her apartment a bit, she’d given up and decided to just head to the lab, even though it’s a weekend. At the time, she’d thought that she could at least get some work done while waiting around - and give her overactive anxiety a break in the process.

She’d lost track of time, of course. Now she pushes her car twenty kilometers per minute over the speed limit, her mind going back once again to the moment she received Nico’s text.

To say that the message had come as a shock is the understatement of the century.

Maki didn't see it until after work, when she'd climbed into her car to go home. She doesn’t have much of a reason to check her phone at the lab anymore; now that she’s single, she doesn’t have many people to message outside of her family. Especially since she sees her two closest friends five days a week already.

Kicking her phone addiction had been difficult at first, but in the end it was better. Better to ignore the nagging ache of loneliness she felt every time she realized how many hours had passed without a single notification. Better to stop agonizing over old conversations, to stop drafting up messages and deleting them because they were too pointless to send.

So when she'd settled comfortably into the driver's seat and spotted the little notification light blinking, she’d expected it to be nothing more than an email offering 10% off at a store she once shopped at two years ago.

But it wasn't some advertisement, or a reminder from her mother telling her to eat.

It was a message from the last person she ever expected to speak to again.

_I need to talk to you._

At first, Maki was convinced that her tired eyes were deceiving her. But she'd read it several times over, checking the timestamp carefully to make sure it wasn't an old message she'd somehow stupidly missed.

There was no mistaking it.

The message really was from Nico.

_Nico._

For a good minute or two, Maki just stared. And then, she reacted the way anyone in her situation would have. She shoved her phone away in her glove compartment, planted her keys in the ignition, and agonized over it during the entire drive home.

By the time she made it back to her apartment, the list of questions she wanted to ask was so long it was practically out of control. _Why now? What about? Do you really? Is this a joke? Are you drunk? Did you send this to the right person?_

But as much as the desire to ask was burning inside her, she couldn’t bring herself to send any of them. Maki knew instinctively that it was an unmissable opportunity - a one-in-a-million chance - to talk to Nico one more time. And she wasn't about to risk scaring her off by saying the wrong thing.

So she'd thought on it some more. In the end, it'd probably taken her at least half an hour of typing and retyping before she finally settled on an embarrassingly simple reply.

_Okay. When?_

Things came together almost too smoothly after that. Before Maki could even register it, they’d worked out all the details. A date. A time. A place.

And that's how she ended up here, literally speeding towards Nico, her whole body thrumming with nerves and uncertainty.

She has no idea what's going to happen when she arrives. She’s not even sure what she _wants_ to happen. Right after she and Tsubasa had officially broke up, she would’ve given anything for a chance to talk to Nico again. But now, her fingers tremble around the steering wheel. She's terrified to find out just how much has changed.

A lot can happen in three months. Maybe Nico only messaged because she landed her dream job in a country far away, and she wants to air her grievances before leaving, drawing a line neatly under this whole thing. Maybe she wants to introduce Maki to her beautiful new girlfriend. The possibilities flash through her mind, all of them seeming like perfectly reasonable explanations for why Nico might want to meet after so long, and all disappointing enough to make her stomach positively ache.

It’s not like Maki holds any particular expectations. In fact, she’s almost entirely clueless about what outcome she's even hoping for herself. Logically, she knows there's no denying how Nico made her feel. Not a day goes by without thinking of their time together - of fireworks or brief, stolen kisses, of the warmth she'd felt that night on the beach. They flash in her mind like unwanted ads, in strange quiet moments that she can't avoid no matter how she tries to suppress them.

But what if, when she sees Nico again, she realizes that her feelings have faded? What if she looks at Nico and feels nothing? What if, after all this time, they have nothing left to say to each other?

By the time she pulls into her parking space and shuts off the engine, Maki's not even sure if meeting up is a good idea. It takes her trembling fingers several tries to get the key out of the ignition, and when she does, her breath comes out all wavering and weak.

She leans back against the seat and closes her eyes, inhaling and exhaling deeply like she’s at a yoga class, not sitting in her static car in a very public place. She focuses her energy, summoning her last remnants of courage. She has no idea what’s about to happen. But she knows she won’t get answers by keeping Nico waiting any longer.

Her pace is hurried as she rushes down the street, dodging around endless irritatingly slow walkers. She feels so agitated, so entirely unprepared. Her mind runs through the ways in which this could all go wrong before it even starts. Maybe she’s mistaken about the venue. Maybe Nico got tired of waiting. Maybe she changed her mind. Maki speeds up, her heart beating faster with every step, as though it might throb right out of her chest at any second. Everything - the cars on the street, her shoes scuffing against the pavement - seems unnaturally, unbearably loud. She rounds the corner almost at a run, praying to every god she can think of-

And she spots a familiar figure standing in front of the little coffee shop where they’d agreed to meet.

Warmth floods through Maki’s entire body. She slows almost to a stop, the swirling storm in her brain dissipating, then breathes in deep as she drinks in the first sight she’s had of Nico in three months.

She’s in a cute blouse and a cuter skirt, her long hair fixed in place with the kind of hair ribbon Maki might have rolled her eyes at, back when they first met. Maki notices the way she plays with her hands, twisting her fingers back and forth like she's nervous.

Nico's oblivious to her presence, and then she's not. And then she raises a hand to brush a stray strand of hair from her face, and catches sight of Maki. Even from several meters away, Maki can see the way she stiffens. Maki doesn’t have time to think about what that means. Because Nico’s right there and Maki’s close enough to smell her favourite perfume and it's so familiar that it hurts. It feels like stepping back into another lifetime. Maki's nerves reach boiling point, threatening to consume her completely.

She takes a breath as she finishes her approach.

"Hi Nico," she says shakily.

It’s only a small consolation that Nico looks just as unsure as Maki feels. She opens her mouth and closes it, her eyes darting up and down, making Maki feel self-conscious.

“Hey,” Nico finally replies. The corners of her mouth turn down in the smallest of frowns. “Did you have work today? I didn’t know you were so busy…”

For a moment, Maki has no idea what she’s talking about. Then, following Nico’s line of sight, she looks down and belatedly realizes she’s still wearing her lab coat. In her hurry, she’d totally forgotten to take it off.

“Oh god, no,” she says hastily, flushing. Instinctively, she begins shrugging off the coat. “I just dropped by the lab in the morning- I’ll go put it in my car-”

“No,” interjects Nico, and she thrusts an arm out to stop Maki before she can turn tail and run. “Leave it on. It looks-” Inexplicably, her cheeks turn red as well. She clears her throat. “It’s fine.”

Maki hesitates, then straightens up and tugs the garment back into place. They linger awkwardly in front of the cafe entrance, probably making an odd couple to anyone who deigns to notice them.

Finally, Nico clears her throat and gestures towards the door. “So, should we, uh. Should we go in?”

Maki just nods, her cheeks still burning. Nico takes the initiative and pulls open the door for her. The scent of freshly brewed coffee washes over them as they step inside.

The cafe is crowded for its small size - not unusual for a Saturday afternoon. They wait quietly in line, a polite distance apart. The barista takes Nico’s order over the chatter and bustle of the other patrons while Maki scans the room, searching in vain for an open table.

“Take-out, please,” she hears Nico say, and she spins back around, confused. Nico steps aside and shrugs at her sheepishly.

“Thought we could take a walk or something,” she explains in response to Maki’s questioning expression. “It’s a nice day, isn’t it?”

Maki glances through the big front window at the bright blue sky above. She inclines her head in agreement and steps forward to order.

A few minutes later, they’re back outside, both clutching their beverages in hand. Maki settled for the house special, treating herself to some variety from her usual black coffee by stirring in cream and half a stick of sugar. Nico, rather predictably, ordered the sweetest drink on the menu, some blended abomination of caramel and ice. Maki almost teases her for it but balks at the last second, not knowing if it would be too overfamiliar.

They wander aimlessly, eventually cutting across the street so they end up at the walkway by the nearby river. Maki’s glad that Nico suggested take-out. She feels much calmer out here than she would have felt cooped up inside a busy coffee shop. Plus, the weather really is perfect. There are plenty of other pedestrians out and about, walking their dogs or soaking up the sunshine, and they offer plenty of distraction. Both she and Nico make a pretense of people-watching as an excuse to not look at each other. The thick tension between them reignites Maki’s anxiety. Maybe they really don’t have anything to say anymore.

It feels like they walked miles before Nico finally breaks the silence. “So, um," she ventures. “How are you?”

Maki’s not sure how to answer that question. On one hand, everything in her life is functioning as normal. On the other hand, she’s here now, heart pounding, right beside Nico, and all she can think about is how much she’s missed her.

“Fine,” she answers, after a beat of silence. It’s the safest response, although, judging by Nico’s small frown, not exactly the most encouraging one.

“Cool." Nico's voice is breezy, but her gaze is cast anywhere but at Maki. “How's work? All that… sciencey stuff going well?”

Maki jerks her shoulders noncommittally. “Yeah. How about you? I heard…” She trails off, not knowing how to end the sentence. Nozomi mentioned in passing that Nico no longer worked at Tsubasa’s store when she’d last met up with her and Eli for drinks a couple of months ago, but she’s not sure Nico would be happy to know Maki’s still kind of in contact with her best friend. “I heard you’re not at the mall anymore.”

If Nico's surprised Maki knows that, she doesn't let it show. “Yeah. It… wasn’t quite working out. But I do have a new job!"

"Oh. That's good. Is it-" Maki takes a sip of her coffee, the hot liquid scalding her tongue. "Um. Do you like it?"

From the look in Nico's eyes, Maki's almost certain that whatever it is, she's not exactly living the dream. "It pays the bills, that's for sure. Oh, look! Who's this cutie?"

Nico propels herself towards a small white dog that's bounding along nearby, leaving Maki hanging. Maki might be annoyed at her for dodging the subject so blatantly if her excitement wasn't so refreshingly cute.

"Oh my god, he's so soft and fluffy!" Nico looks up and beckons her over. Maki shakes her head, but Nico only gestures harder. "Say hi, Maki! It's only polite."

Maki huffs and glances around resignedly for the nearby owner, who smiles and waves his permission. She steps forward and follows Nico's lead, reaching out and taking care not to spill her coffee. The dog’s tail wags furiously as she gives it a few tentative pats. She can’t help but smile, and her shoulders lose some of their rigidity. Nico beams at her over the dog’s furry back, clearly pleased that she’s playing along.

For a moment, it almost feels like nothing's changed. It feels like Maki’s stepped back in time to a bright, unpredictable world. To the kind of place where Nico lead her to the opera blind drunk, or down a terrifying drop on a rollercoaster, screaming out her lungs. A world where everything was loud of confusing and fun. _Really_ fun. Maki's missed this. She missed watching the way Nico throws herself at the world, finding joy in everything she touches. The way Nico draws her in and drags her along, out of the shadows and into direct sunlight. She feels a giddy rush of warmth. Being next to her just feels so _right_.

That is, until the dog gets bored and runs away, leaving Maki crouched down beside Nico, her face too close for comfort. Maki straightens up quickly, flushing. Nico smooths down her skirt, letting the owner and his dog pass by them on the walkway. She looks down at the ground, shifting like she just remembered how awkward this is.

"Sorry, I…" Nico shakes her head, her expression suddenly serious. "I really do want to talk to you." She scans the surrounding area, then points at a more secluded spot overlooking the river. "Let's go sit down over there?"

Maki follows her over to a bench beneath the trees. They brush off a few dead leaves, then sit down side by side. The wide gap between them might as well be an entire ocean, that’s how far away Maki feels right now.

The sound of Nico's straw is almost comically loud as she finishes up the last of her drink.

"Okay," she says, as she places the empty cup down beside her. "So I guess you're wondering what you're doing here, right?"

Not trusting herself to speak, Maki only nods. Nico sighs and folds her hands together, leaning forward until her elbows rest on her knees. They both stare out over the river. The afternoon sunlight reflects off the ripples and waves almost blindingly, and Maki has to squint against the glare.

Finally, Nico draws herself up and wets her lips, preparing to speak. When she opens her mouth again, her voice sounds unnaturally formal.

“First, I wanted to say - thank you for coming. I… I wasn’t sure if you would.”

Maki looks directly at her for the first time since they’ve sat down, and it strikes her that Nico's nervous too. That it must have taken a lot of courage to reach out like this, courage that Maki could never even begin to find.

“Of course I would,” she says softly, before she can stop herself. Nico’s lips quirk up in what could be a relieved smile, but just as quickly, it disappears.

“I’ve wanted to talk to you for awhile,” Nico confesses, going back to playing with her hands. “Ever since right after the… the last time we met, basically.”

Maki flinches at the sudden reference to the incident in Tsubasa’s office, but if Nico notices, she doesn’t show it.

“I wanted to, but I… just didn’t know what to say. I didn't want to get in the way of you and Tsubasa any more than I already had and then suddenly weeks had passed and I-" Nico shifts a little, her eyes fixed firmly on the river. "Honestly, I wasn’t even sure if you _wanted_ to talk to me. When I didn’t hear from you, I kinda figured that was proof enough that you didn’t.”

“That’s not-” Maki begins to deny, but Nico quickly cuts her off.

“It’s fine! I didn’t blame you then, and I don’t blame you now. Things were totally messed up and I completely understand why I wasn't a priority. So don't feel like you have to explain."

"But I-"

"Maki," Nico says firmly. "Just- Just hear me out for a sec, okay? Please. Before I chicken out or something.”

Something about her pleading tone stops Maki from trying to correct her, at least for the moment. Nico stubbornness hasn't changed much, that's for sure. And although some might say Maki occasionally has a stubborn streak herself, she bites back any instincts to protest. Giving Nico chance to speak seems like the kindest option here. And Maki owes her that much, at least.

She leans back against the bench, though it's too firm to be comfortable. The sun glares down harshly, and Maki's lab coat feels too heavy, too stiff against her shoulders.

"Alright," she says, meeting Nico's eyes. "I'm listening."

"Thanks. Well... Here goes?" A look of determination crosses Nico's cute features and she clears her throat twice before she begins. "So, like… When I said I didn't blame you for what happened, I meant it. But I could never say the same for myself. I felt like I'd betrayed you both. Like I'd spent months being too flirty and too touchy-feely, getting too close when I knew you had Tsubasa. And I… I couldn't stand the guilt. I _hated_ what I'd done. All I wanted was to be a good friend, a good employee. I never meant to hurt _anyone._ "

Maki practically has to bite her tongue to stop herself from butting in and pointing out that Nico has nothing to feel guilty about. Compared to Maki, she's just an innocent bystander. Someone who always tried her best to be kind. There's no doubt that all of the hurt inflicted in this situation came from Maki herself, not anyone else. Still, she can hardly protest when she just agreed to listen, so she has no choice but to let Nico continue.

"After everything that went down that day, I had no idea if you'd worked things out with Tsubasa. I thought I’d give you some time to figure things out. So I waited and waited, and when you never reached out to me… Well, it definitely hurt. But I thought that was enough of an answer, and I wanted to respect that. I was sure that you were better off without me over-complicating your life. It was so easy to believe that. _Especially_ since I knew you had my number. I just kept telling myself that if you wanted to talk to me, you would. In my mind, it was over. Done. And even though that made me really, really sad, I just sort of resigned myself to… to never speaking to you again.

"But then… out of nowhere, something changed." Nico swallows and her gaze lifts hesitantly until she meets Maki’s eyes. “I got a visit at work. From Tsubasa.”

This time, Maki isn’t able to stay silent. “You _what_ ?” she blurts, half in shock, half in horror. Nico? And Tsubasa? When did this happen? Why would Tsubasa reach out to her? What could she have to say to Nico? The endless possibilities flash through her mind - how rude she'd initially been about Nico during the campaign, how Maki had basically cheated on Tsubasa, how Maki had acted like a terrible human being in general. Just _thinking_ about it makes her blood run cold.

“I was surprised too,” Nico reassures her hastily, obviously noticing her panic. “To be honest, at first I kinda assumed that she was there to kill me. Or at least ruin my career for good.”

Maki chuckles at Nico’s weak attempt at humor, but it does little to allay her fears. She knows too well that, despite her generally kind and breezy demeanor, Tsubasa can be devastating when she wants to be. She holds her breath, waiting for the inevitable bad news as Nico continues to recount their meeting.

“But she didn’t do any of those things. I mean, I guess it's kinda obvious that she didn't murder me since I'm here, but…" Nico's laugh is a short, nervous sound. "But actually, she was really _nice_.”

Maki raises an eyebrow. She watches Nico blink a few times and there's this look of awed disbelief on her face, like she's still surprised by it, even now.

“So… we talked. And even though it was terrifying at first, she really helped me realize a lot of things. Like, that I was being too hard on myself. That it wasn't my fault that you guys broke up. That even though you might’ve _looked_ like a perfect couple, I had no idea what was really going on between you. It might sound dramatic, but honestly, it was kind of life changing. I was so convinced that Tsubasa would never, ever forgive me, and then she showed up and she was kinder than I ever thought I deserved and… and that made me realize how wrong I was about everything. And that's kind of what led me back to you...

"Suddenly I was all like, am I _sure_ Maki hates me? Do I _know_ that she blames me for everything? I realized that I'd filled in the gaps all by myself without even asking how you really felt. And part of me wondered if maybe you'd done the same." Nico catches Maki's eye, and her cheeks promptly turn pink. "N-Not that I thought you were just sitting around daydreaming about me or anything! I just kinda figured that if Tsubasa could stop by my salon and smile at me after everything, then _anything_ could happen. Then I really didn't know anything at all."

Nico shifts and takes a breath. "I invited you here on pure impulse. And I panicked the second after I'd done it. I seriously considered setting fire to my phone and buying a one-way ticket out of the country. But when I stopped freaking out, I realized just how much I wanted to see you again. To tell you how much I missed you and how sorry I was. Because after all this time, Maki I…"

Nico pauses, looking unsure, and Maki can't help but lean in. Her heart constricts against her ribcage, then accelerates to a speed she's certain any medical professional would find genuinely concerning.

"What?" she presses gently, when Nico bites her lip. Her pulse thrums with anticipation, with hope.

Nico breathes in deep and draws herself up. "I still care about you," she states firmly. "And I couldn't bear not knowing if you feel the same way or not. So even though it's totally selfish… I wanted to ask you face to face. I know you have every right to hate me. But on the off chance you don't, then…” The last of her words come out in a rush. “I was wondering if we could still be friends."

 _Friends_. Maki didn't realize how much she'd been expecting a different word until this one makes her recoil back as if she's been struck.

"Oh. Friends," she repeats. Try as she might, Maki can't keep the disappointment out of her voice. She doesn't even know why. Nico's offering complete redemption and closure, and the chance to hang out again. What more could she ask for?

Nico mistakes her crestfallen expression for some kind of rejection. "You don’t have to say yes," she hurries to add. "And I'd totally understand if you wanna take some time and think about it. I just wanted you to know…"

Maki shakes her head and runs a hand through her hair. “No, it’s not that,” she begins, wracking her brain for a good way to explain herself. “I guess I’m just… surprised, that’s all. I thought I was the only one who still wanted to-" Maki clears her throat softly. " _Reconnect_."

At those words, Nico’s eyes light up with their familiar, characteristic warmth.

“You did?” Nico asks eagerly, scooting a bit closer. Maki has to resist the urge to back away. She hadn’t exactly forgotten how little regard Nico has for personal space, but it’s been so long since she experienced it firsthand. She wills herself to focus, to ignore how close Nico's bare leg is to her own.

“I wanted to reach out," Maki admits softly. "Ever since I broke up with Tsubasa. It's all I’ve wanted to do, actually."

Nico tilts her head to the left and regards Maki, curious but not impatient or judgemental.

"So why didn't you?" she prods gently. "What stopped you?"

"I…" Maki hesitates, fully aware of how lame she’s going to sound. "I didn't think you'd want me to,” she confesses. “Between breaking up with Tsubasa and finding a new place to live, I had a _lot_ going on. I kept on making excuses, telling myself the time wasn’t right - that I was too busy to give you the attention you deserve, that I was too distracted to be a good friend. Before I knew it, so much time had already passed and… Well. I figured that if you actually wanted to see me again, you had my number too...”

Nico’s mouth drops open as she processes this information. “Wait,” she says after a moment. She points one finger at Maki and another at herself. “Are you saying that we _both_ just assumed the other person would make a move first?”

Maki’s cheeks color and she crosses her arms. “Well, how was I supposed to know you still wanted to talk? You ran right out of Tsubasa’s office and then I never heard from you again. I thought you hated me!”

Nico huffs and puts her hands on her hips. “I only stopped talking to you because I thought _you_ didn’t want to talk to _me_!” she shoots back accusingly.

Her announcement rings out into the air, and they both fall silent. A bird twitters above their heads as neither of them speak for a solid thirty seconds.

Maki snorts, loud and inelegant.

Nico's eyes widen in surprise and Maki covers her mouth, trying to disguise the embarrassing sound, but she can't stop the giggles from bubbling to the surface, because it's so stupid. _They're_ so stupid.

It takes a moment, but soon Nico's chuckling too. They build off of each other, until they’re practically collapsed over with mirth. Maki’s missed the sound of Nico’s laughter so much. It’s just so _good_ to hear it again.

After an indefinite amount of time, in which they attract more than a few concerned looks from some people walking by, they manage to rein themselves in. Nico wipes away some stray tears from the corner of her eyes, shaking her head.

“I guess we’re pretty dumb, huh?” she says, her lips lifted in a conciliatory smile. Maki nods back at her.

"Next time,” she says, “let's just talk to each other."

Nico waggles a finger, her expression mock stern. "Only if you call me first."

Maki snorts again. "Me?" She asks, pressing a hand to her chest. "But we both know you have _my_ number."

The weak joke is enough to get them giggling again. Maki’s pretty sure this is more laughing than she’s done in the past three months combined. Her stomach aches in the best way possible.

Once they’ve calmed down again, Nico turns her head towards Maki. Her eyes are bright and warm.

“So…” she ventures. “Now that we’ve established that we’re both complete idiots… Are we friends again?”

There's a hopeful optimism in her voice and a shy grin on Nico's face, and Maki almost says yes immediately. It seems foolish not to. She's missed this so much, and it's clear that Nico has too. Things could carry on like this. They could hang out again, talk again, laugh together again. Everything could just go back to normal.

For a second, that’s all Maki wants.

But when she looks at Nico, her cheeks still flushed from laughter, her nose crinkled in that way Maki’s always secretly thought was adorable, looking ridiculous and cute and pretty all at once, reality hits her.

She _can’t_. Because she can’t lie to Nico. She can’t lie to herself. And there’s something that’s been on her mind for a long time now, something that she has to know for sure.

Maki takes a deep breath and squeezes her hands into fists.

"No."

The smile slides off Nico’s face instantly and her eyes go wide. “O-Oh,” she says, subdued. "But - But I thought-"

"Not because I don't like you," Maki hurries to clarify. "Because I _do_ , Nico. Because I can't just act like everything’s fine until… until we talk about what's been going on between us."

Nico blinks rapidly. "What do you-"

Maki straightens her back, her gaze locked firmly on Nico. "I messed up before. I know that now. I kept hiding how I felt, thinking it was easier to keep quiet, easier to lock all my feelings away, easier to hope everything would magically turn out okay. But I just ended up hurting everyone, including myself. And this time, I’m- I'm not going to make the same mistake.”

Nico stares, her mouth set in a thin line. Maki’s throat is dry, but she can’t run away now. She plunges on, scrambling to organize her thoughts into something more cohesive.

“When we first met, I thought you were the worst human being on this planet. I didn’t understand how one person could be so annoying and so full of herself.”

Nico winces. “Ouch. You really don’t have to go into the details…”

“No, listen. I hated you. I complained about you. I did everything I could to make your life difficult. But you didn’t care. You did your job perfectly anyway. And…” Maki’s voice softens. “And _more._ You reached out to me when I was upset. You listened to me, when no one else did."

“I was just doing what anyone would’ve done…” Nico mutters, but Maki brushes off her interjection.

"That's not true. I was horrible to you. But there you were, dropping everything so that I wouldn’t be alone on my birthday. That might’ve been the nicest thing anyone’s _ever_ done for me.”

Nico flushes a little, and when she waves her hand through the air dismissively, it’s with little conviction. “That was… That was for the free dinner?”

Even in this situation, Maki can’t resist rolling her eyes. “And I suppose you just wanted a free ticket to the opera too?” she remarks sarcastically.

The corner of Nico’s mouth twitches at that. “No, that was definitely out of the goodness of my heart,” she quips back. “I wasn’t about to let you get bored to death.”

It’s just enough encouragement for Maki to press onwards. “You were there for me, Nico. Every time. Maybe that’s why…” Maki hesitates. “Maybe that’s why I started falling for you.”

When she sees Nico stiffen, Maki loses her nerve a bit. She has to look away. Her gaze drops down to her hands clasped in her lap, and she briefly second-guesses her rash decision to tell Nico everything. But it's too late to turn back now. And it's not like she can make things any _worse._

“I didn’t want to like you. And God knows I never meant to think of you as more than a friend. But somehow it just… happened. Being around you felt so _natural._ You made me laugh and you dragged me along to all kinds of weird places and... And you made me realize that life could be so much more than just _acceptable_.”

Maki doesn’t dare to look up. She doesn’t dare to find what kind of expression Nico’s making right now. She swallows hard, her knuckles white, and keeps speaking, hoping that at least a fraction of what she’s saying makes some kind of sense.

"I know you probably don't think of me in that way. I haven’t been a great friend. The fact that you even want to _talk_ to me again should be more than enough, but-" Maki's voice cracks a little as she strains to remain coherent. “But I’m through with hiding how I feel. So I just wanted you to know. That I felt that way before. And… that I still do.”

“Oh, Maki…” Nico sighs, and the sympathy in her voice is almost too much for Maki to bear. She thought she was prepared for rejection, but the idea that Nico could actually feel _sorry_ for how delusional she’s being makes her panic.

“I know it’s stupid,” she blurts, bunching up the fabric of her lab coat in her fists. “I probably shouldn’t have even bothered telling you because now it’s just going to make things more awkward between us and-”

“No, Maki. I-”

“But I can’t just pretend these feelings don’t exist, Nico! I thought I was over it when we stopped talking but just one look at you and I don’t know what to think anymore, and even if it messes everything up I just - I need you to know that-”

“ _Maki_.” Nico’s firm voice cuts through her babbling, shutting her up. “Maki, would you please just look at me for a sec?”

Reluctantly, Maki lifts her gaze. She expects to find disgust, maybe, or worse, pity. But Nico’s eyes are wide and shining, and not with surprise or anger. If she didn’t know better, Maki would’ve described it as a sort of bewildered awe.

"I’m sorry to cut you off but…" Nico pauses, and her mouth twists cutely to the side. "Honestly, I'm kinda lost here? I really don’t get _why_ -"

"Why… I have feelings for you?" Maki blinks slowly.

"No." Nico shakes her head, exasperated. " _No_. What I don’t understand is why you're so convinced that I don't feel the same."

Maki frowns. A beat of silence passes as she considers it.

"W-Well, why would you? I practically forced my feelings on you when I still had a girlfriend and then I ignored you for months and it's probably all my fault you lost your job and it's not like I was ever particularly good company to begin with and-" Maki swallows against the lump in her throat. "And-"

Nico’s hand finds Maki’s arm, and the delicate press of her fingers is enough to startle Maki into silence.

"Okay,” she says. “Next question. Did you fake your way into your super smart science job or something?"

"Did I... _huh_?" Maki blurts out in confusion. She waits for Nico to laugh, but her expression is soft and serious.

“See, I always thought you were some kind of genius. And yet you seem to think that I reached out and asked you to come here and spent all this time telling you how much I missed you because… because I don't _care_?"

“I-I never said you don’t care," Maki says, defensively. “But we can’t be talking about the same thing here, Nico. Y-You just said all that stuff about being friends!”

Nico throws up her hands. “We haven’t spoken in _months_! What was I supposed to do? Jump right in with a, ‘Hey Maki, I know it’s been a million years, but now that you’re single, I just wanted you to know I’ve always liked you more than I’ve ever liked _anyone_?’”

Maki’s breath catches. Her heart just about stops entirely. She finds herself frozen, her hand suspended awkwardly in mid air. She gapes at Nico, not daring to believe she heard her correctly. It seems like minutes pass before she can respond, her hand falling softly to her lap.

“Is - Is that true?” she manages to ask, though her lungs feel like they’re barely working.

Nico’s cheeks flush pink. Her eyes dart left, then right. Clearly, she hadn’t been planning on saying so much. “I… Um… Yeah…?” Panic clouds her petite features, and Maki worries for a moment that she might lose her again.

Without even thinking about it, she reaches out and grips Nico’s elbow, holding her in place. Her fingers brushing against Nico’s bare skin makes her recall that night on the beach, where they’d been so close - _so_ close - to admitting that there was something between them. By the way Nico glances up sharply, Maki can tell she’s not the only one remembering.

“Nico?” she murmurs pleadingly.

Nico’s expression loses its uncertainty, hardening into something more decisive. She straightens and faces Maki squarely. “I never thought anything would come of it, since you were dating Tsubasa. But I like you a lot, Maki. I’ve liked you for a stupidly long time now.”

Something inside Maki melts. A liquid warmth pumps with increasing urgency through the valves of her heart, spreading from her chest to the rest of her body. She shudders - with hope, or maybe with fear - unable to grasp the meaning of Nico’s words.

“Are you… Are you serious?” she manages to rasp out.

Nico’s blushing hard now. "Do you really think I'd _joke_ about something like this?"

"No, I just - I don't want to misunderstand." Maki's loosens her grip on Nico's elbow, her fingers fumbling for the ends of her own hair. "When you say _like._ You mean… as more than a friend, right?"

Nico groans and covers her face with her hands, and for a moment, Maki thinks maybe she _has_ misunderstood. But then she speaks, her muffled voice soft and trembling. "Y-You're really going to make me say it, aren't you?"

Maki's not even entirely sure what _it_ is, but her greedy heart aches to hear it anyway. "Please," she murmurs.

"Fine," Nico lowers her hands. " _Fine_. I think you’re great, okay? I think you’re smart and sweet and - and so pretty. God, Maki, I've never met anyone who even comes _close_ to being as pretty as you are and I think about that time we kissed _all the time_ \- like, an embarrassingly unhealthy amount - and I’m crazy about you. Is that clear enough for you?"

Maki’s whole face burns. It’s embarrassing and it’s cute and it’s everything she’s ever wanted to hear. It almost seems too good to be true, except there’s Nico, fidgeting nervously with the hem of her skirt as she waits for Maki’s answer. This is _real._ Maki wishes fervently that she could come up with something smooth to say, but she's so overwhelmed - her heart's so _full_ \- that she can only muster up a nod.

“It’s the same for me,” she whispers.

The corners of Nico’s mouth lift at the sound of that. She brushes her hair behind one ear delicately, and when her hand drops back down to the bench, her fingertips brush lightly against Maki’s. They gaze at each other shyly, and Maki feels sure she’s not the only one who needs a moment to take in the enormity of what they’ve just admitted.

“So,” Maki says finally. She clears her throat awkwardly. “Where do we go from here? Are we…” She stumbles over the question, tries again, unable to quite keep the tremble out of her voice, “Are we d-dating?”

At that, Nico’s face falls again. Maki’s anxiety comes rushing back; she’s not sure she could handle the disappointment if Nico rejects her. Not after all this.

“What is it?” she presses uneasily. “Did I say something wrong?”

Nico shakes her head. “No! Not at all. It’s just…” She bites her lip, then sighs. "Are you really sure about this?”

When Maki blinks in confusion, she expands reluctantly. “I’m… I’m not Tsubasa, you know. I can’t give you everything she’s given you. My budget's kinda more fast food than fancy ten course dinners, and I’m not, like, super rich or successful or anything. Are you _really_ sure?”

 _Oh._ So that’s what she was worried about. It’s such a relief that Maki almost laughs, but she catches herself when she sees Nico’s pained expression. This is obviously really bothering her.

“You’re right,” Maki announces. “You’re not Tsubasa.” Nico’s eyes widen, but Maki’s not finished. She takes Nico’s hand gently, running a thumb over her slender fingers. “You’re the cutest, kindest, weirdest, most talented makeup artist in the whole world. And that's more than enough for me.”

A slow smile steals over Nico’s face like a sunrise. The sight of it gives Maki the encouragement she needs. She takes a deep breath.

"I know my track record isn't great here. I mean, just look how my last relationship ended up.” She allows herself a mirthless laugh. “I'm not sure I'd date me, all things considered. But I am sure about _this_. For the first time in my life, I _know_ what I want. I want to be with _you._ And even if turns out to be a complete mess…” The idea of it makes Maki shudder. “Even if it doesn’t work out, I want to try. I really, really do. Because I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. Because I-”

It’s not until Nico raises her eyebrows that Maki comes to the sudden realization that she’s babbling. She halts her speech abruptly, mortified by how much has spilled out of her. She hadn’t meant to get so carried away.

When she doesn’t finish her sentence, Nico blinks a few times, as if coming out of a trance. She rubs the back of her neck wonderingly with her free hand, still grinning to herself.

“Wow, Maki,” she says, in a lilting voice. “Who knew you could be so honest?”

“D-Don’t get the wrong idea,” Maki stammers reflexively. She retreats up the bench a bit, already starting to regret being so candid. Nico follows her movement, scooting closer even as she backs away.

“Oh come on now,” she teases. “Don’t get all shy on me. Please. Go back to telling me how much you love me.”

Maki snatches her hand away and crosses her arms self-consciously. “I’m done,” she mutters, turning away. She’s already said enough embarrassing things to last her a lifetime.

"Hey." Nico’s tone turns sober immediately. She puts a soft hand on Maki’s shoulder, and when Maki faces her again, her expression is contrite. "I'm sorry. I know now's probably not the time to joke around, but this is all just… kinda overwhelming? I guess…” She breathes in deep, as if gearing herself up for something, and reaches for Maki’s hand. “I guess it’s just like, my wildest dreams are coming true. I've wanted this for so long, Maki. And... I really want to give this a try too.”

Maki’s heartbeat stutters. She lifts her gaze, searching for some sign of humor in Nico’s eyes, but finds only warmth and sincerity.

“Nico…” she whispers, unable to respond.

Nico’s grip tightens ever so slightly. She shifts closer, her fingers brushing over Maki's cheek. Maki gravitates towards her. It’s far from her first kiss, but she’s trembling like it's going to be. Just a little closer and -

"W-Wait," Maki blurts out, holding up her hand. "I think… I-I have coffee breath?” She swallows against her dry mouth, wishing she’d picked something more appropriate, like water or peppermint tea.

Nico laughs softly. Their fingers twine together. Just a soft tug and she’s right in front of Maki, so close she’s practically a blur.

“I think I can handle it,” she says.

When Maki thinks back to their first kiss, she remembers a mess of urgency and guilt. She remembers the hard press of the desk against her back, the overwhelming ache that their time together was numbered.

Their second kiss is nothing like that.

Nico’s lips press against Maki’s, and they’re softer than anything she ever imagined. She kisses her carefully, like she’s afraid Maki will break, or disappear. Her sweet breath sends subtle heat coursing through Maki’s veins, making her giddy and light-headed. All she can do is curve closer and let her eyelids flutter shut.

If their first kiss was an explosion, then their second is pure joy.

She clings to the soft fabric of Nico’s blouse, unable to bring herself to give a damn about who’s watching. She doesn’t ever want to stop, and they don’t until there’s no air left in their lungs and they have to pull back, gasping softly for breath. They break apart reluctantly, and Maki presses her forehead warm against Nico’s, unwilling to fully pull away. Nico’s eyes are sparkling with unabashed awe, as if she’s really seeing Maki for the first time.

“Wow,” Nico breathes.

Maki nods in agreement. They both chuckle a little at their loss for words. Just the sound of Nico’s laughter lifts a weight off of Maki’s shoulders.

“So… we’re…” Maki searches for the right way to phrase it but comes up empty. “We’re really doing this, huh?”

Nico smirks. "I mean, at this point, I’d be pretty pissed off if we're _not_. I’m kind of invested here."

Maki laughs. "Me too,” she says, softly. She squeezes Nico’s fingers, and Nico curls them so that they’re holding hands properly. A light breeze ruffles at Maki’s hair as she relaxes, the tension leaving her body for probably the first time in months.

“So what’s next?” Nico asks, kicking her feet a little against the bench. “Got any more crazy confessions? Any big speeches you wanna get out there?”

Maki shakes her head. “No. I think… I think something normal would be nice. Like maybe…” She blushes. “Maybe we could go on a date?”

Nico beams at her suggestion. “Of course!” She taps a finger to the bottom of her chin, pretending to contemplate something, then winks. “You _do_ still owe me a skydiving trip.”

Maki giggles a little hysterically as she pictures the two of them throwing themselves off of a plane right after all this. She’s pretty sure her stomach would still flip-flop around less while she’s hurtling through the sky than it has in the past hour or so.

"I was thinking something a little tamer. Like… dinner? Tonight, maybe?"

Nico grins and pretends to consider it. “ _I suppose_ I could be convinced. Where were you thinking?"

"I… I don't know actually. Anywhere’s good.” She frowns, then tugs at her lab coat. “As long as I can ditch this stupid thing first."

"Aw, why?" Nico bumps her shoulder as she shifts closer to take hold of the white fabric. Maki has a strong suspicion it’s more of an excuse to touch her than anything. "It’s a good look for you. Hot."

"I look," Maki says with quiet dignity, "like I'm a doctor slacking off during work hours.”

Nico waggles her eyebrows suggestively and tilts her face up. “Feel free to give me a checkup any time, Doctor Nishikino.”

Maki rolls her eyes. But moments later, she finds herself leaning in again.

This time, she’s more prepared. She’s regained use of her hands, for a start, and she has no problem drawing Nico in until there’s no space left between them. Maki fully intends to be cool and confident, but when their lips touch, her heart still hammers furiously in her chest. Her fingers trail through Nico’s soft hair as she leans into the movement of their mouths, and she’s overwhelmed by a thrumming desire and the heart-swelling realization that this is her life now. That she’s not dreaming. That she can just kiss Nico now, without feeling guilty or afraid.

When they finally draw back again, Nico looks dazed.

“I think…” she says slowly, “I think I need a more in-depth examination.”

Maki punches her in the shoulder. Nico throws her head back and cracks up. She continues laughing even as Maki narrows her eyes at her.

"You're the worst, you know that?" Maki grumbles, but it’s mostly for show. It’s hard to be angry when Nico looks so cute.

Nico smiles back sweetly, fluttering her eyelashes. "Maybe,” she says. “But you love me anyway."

Maki can’t deny it and, more importantly, she doesn’t want to. Ordinarily, she might jump at the opportunity to make some teasing comment about how smug Nico is, or how annoying, but the truth is that right now Nico could do _anything_ and Maki would still be hopelessly enamored with her.

“Well!” Nico announces, and stands up abruptly. When Maki gives her a confused look, she extends a hand out. “Let’s go. I’ll walk you back to your car. We can figure out what we want to eat from there.”

Maki lets Nico help her to her feet. Nico’s hand is warm in hers. They walk along the river at a leisurely pace, as if they have all the time in the world.

Maki doesn’t want to jump to conclusions. After all, she and Nico haven’t spoken for months, and they’ve only just made up. By all rights, she has no business feeling as confident as she does. But for the first time in her life, she’s not worried about where she’s going.

Somehow, she just knows that things are going to turn out okay.


	10. Epilogue

**i.**

“Nico,” Maki rasps out. “It’s almost 7:30. We really need to _-”_

Nico continues to trail soft kisses along her neck. “Need to what, Maki?” she murmurs.

“Need to go. Need to _\- ahhh-”_

The soft sound sends shivers down Nico’s spine. She presses harder, pinning Maki back against the door they were totally planning on heading out of before they got a little… _distracted._ Maki’s mouth finds Nico’s easily, and her weak protests fade quickly to a messy kiss that’s achingly addictive. Heat ignites somewhere low in Nico’s stomach, and she can’t even _think_ about being anywhere else but right here, with her hands trailing over the curve of Maki’s hip. Sure, okay, so _maybe_ they have places to be. But can anyone blame Nico for taking her time a little, when she has Maki practically melting in her hands like this?

“7:33,” Maki mutters when they pause for breath, and Nico almost laughs. Typical, sensible Maki, freaking out because it’s three whole minutes past the time they agreed to set off. 

“If you wanna go so badly,” Nico says, “then why don’t you stop kissing me?”

“ _You_ started it. I only asked you to zip up my dress. Which you never did, by the way.”

Nico slides her hands into the open space below the strap of Maki’s bra before tugging the zipper up slowly. Maki arches into the motion.

“Five more minutes?” Nico practically purrs, feeling a smug sense of satisfaction when Maki shudders.

Nico gasps in surprise when Maki grabs her by the face with both hands and pulls her in. They share another sweet, heady kiss that nearly sends Nico reeling. They’ve been dating for over three months now, but she still can't get enough. She could probably do this all day, every day for the rest of eternity and not get even slightly bored.

“There,” Maki says, pulling back, her lips tinged pink. Nico misses the warmth of her mouth already. “Is that enough for you? Can we go now?” 

“Are you kidding me?” Nico groans. “Now I _really_ don’t want to leave.” 

Maki huffs and lets go of her, turning away. “Don’t be a baby,” she says briskly, walking over to the sofa to collect her purse. Nico admires the view from behind, appreciating the way Maki’s midnight-blue dress hugs her curves as she bends down.

“Do we _have_ to go?” she whines, though she obediently begins slipping on her cute fancy shoes.

“Yes. Eli’s our friend. And besides, you were the one who wanted to go in the first place, remember? Something about fashion celebrities being there or whatever?”

Shoot. Nico can’t argue with that. She sighs dramatically, checking herself in the small mirror by the door. Her hair, curled to perfection only minutes ago, is tousled from when she pounced on Maki earlier, and she brushes hurriedly at it with her fingers. 

Maki, armed with her bag, steps around her and unlocks the door. “Come on. You look great.”

“Wait!” Nico says. She casts her gaze back towards the living room. “I need to get my other stuff too. I’ll die if I have to walk home in heels.”

“Why?” Maki pauses and looks back over her shoulder, tilting her head. “You’re staying over tonight, aren’t you?”

Nico’s heart skips a beat. 

“Uh, yup!” she chirps, trying to disguise how excited the prospect makes her. Maki’s eyes sparkle. She _definitely_ knows the effect she’s having, and it takes every bit of Nico’s inner strength to resist kissing her over again.

“Let’s get going then.” Maki pulls open the door. Nico grins and follows.

She’s already looking forward to coming back.

***

The gallery is bigger than Nico expects. Of course, she always knew that Eli was a big deal, but she kind of expected a small, intimate gathering, figuring that Eli would prefer not to make a fuss. Instead, she arrives and finds a huge room and polished wood floors, crammed full of admiring photographs that hang in every available space. Nico clutches her free champagne, gripping Maki’s arm in awe.

“Wow. This place is _amazing,_ ” she says, scanning the room. “Ooh, look! It’s you!”

Maki follows Nico’s gaze towards a photo of herself, posing on the beach in just a bikini, and Nico feels the way she shifts awkwardly. The newly designed campaign has been public for a while now, but Maki still seems to find her modelling photos embarrassing. Nico gets a special sense of satisfaction from making a show of pointing out billboards or magazine ads whenever she spots them. Mostly because it’s so cute to see her blush.

Maki angles them both away from it, steering them towards a different set of canvases. As a prolific fashion photographer, Eli’s shot a fair share of models, and Nico recognizes a lot of the attractive faces in the photographs. In her biased opinion, though, Maki’s much prettier than every one of them. She leans against Maki a little more, resting against the warmth of her arm. Even now, she can barely believe how much she lucked out.

“There they are. Over there,” Maki says, nodding. 

Nico smiles as she spots Eli, looking effortlessly cool and surrounded by a group of important looking people. She takes a few steps towards her, planning to linger nearby with Maki until she’s free. 

“So, you finally made it,” a familiar voice trills.

Nico turns to find Nozomi grinning at them. Her eyes shimmer, and Nico clocks her eyeshadow as a shade from the Kira Cosmetics Christmas palette she’s been dying to get her hands on. 

“A little late, aren’t you? Did you get caught up somewhere?”

“Who, us?” Nico shakes her head. “We’ve been here for ages. You must’ve just… missed us. Right, Maki?”

Maki instinctively pats down her hair, a motion that doesn’t escape Nozomi’s notice. She flashes a suggestive grin, which irks Nico, just a little. Nozomi’s always been annoyingly perceptive.

“You made it!” Eli approaches them just as Nico’s about to tell Nozomi to mind her own business. By the flush in her cheeks and the cheer in her voice, it’s obvious that she’s already had a few glasses of champagne.

“Hey!” Nico whirls around immediately, beaming the biggest smile she can manage. She pulls Eli in for a quick hug. “It’s good to see you!”

Eli squeezes her back, then reaches for Maki as well. “Thank you both so much for coming.” 

Maki returns the gesture. “Thanks for inviting us,” she replies. 

Eli steps back and glances around the gallery, waving her hand at the other guests. “I didn’t expect so many people to show up!” 

“Well, of course they would,” Nozomi says, a dreamy look stealing over her face. “You’re amazing.”

Eli giggles and wraps an arm around Nozomi’s waist fondly. Nico and Maki glance at each other with mixed amusement and faint exasperation. Their friends haven’t even begun to tone down their lovey-dovey routine yet, even though they’ve been together for way longer than half a year. 

“Yikes. You two are so gross.” Nico shakes her head and turns her attention to the rest of the room, scanning it eagerly. “Come on, Eli. Introduce me to some models!”

“What, seducing Maki wasn’t enough for you?” Nozomi quips. They all laugh at Nico’s offended expression. 

“No!” She pouts. “I’m just… I’m just scouting out my next potential clients!”

Eli lights up at that. “Oh! How's that going? I heard you’ve been making quite a name for yourself.” 

Nico flushes with pride. “Well…” 

“She’s working with actresses now,” Maki jumps in. “Pretty ones. Do you guys think I should be worried?”

As Eli and Nozomi laugh, Nico shares a secret smile with Maki. She gazes at her with warmth and reassurance, hoping Maki knows that she only has eyes for her. It’s a super nice moment, until Nozomi sticks her nose in, her eyebrows raised.

“Well, look at you two,” she teases. “And you call _us_ gross.”

“Shut up.” Nico reluctantly tears her gaze away from her beautiful girlfriend, just so she can glare at Nozomi. “Let’s go, Maki. I’ve had enough of being insulted. And I wanna see the exhibit!” She grabs Maki’s hand in mock indignation and begins pulling her away.

Eli waves them off. “Enjoy the party! Go check out the food table - it’s free!” The sound of Nozomi’s laughter follows them as they leave.

The rest of the party breezes by in a blur of fancy clothing, canvases, and bite-sized appetizers. Nico’s pretty much in her element, wandering around, trying to spot the models from the photos in the crowd at the party. She can’t help but giggle every time someone catches sight of Maki and does a double take. She feels like she’s on the arm of a celebrity - like a candid photograph of the two of them will appear on the front cover of a magazine the next morning - and honestly, she loves every moment of it.

It really is a perfect night. When the waiters and waitresses start subtly rounding up the guests and ushering them out the door, Nico’s practically heartbroken. It’s been so nice to catch up with Eli and Nozomi, not to mention all the cool people they’ve met throughout the night. Even Maki got involved in a bunch of conversations, and when Nico glances at her contented smile as they head reluctantly towards the exit, warmth bubbles in her chest. She totally feels like twirling Maki around or like... bursting into song or something! She’s _that_ happy. She wants to stay in this moment forever. Wistfully, she glances back across the room, wondering if they can still go back for one more little chat with their friends. 

And that’s when she spots a familiar, regal figure looking their way - one she’d recognize anywhere.

Nico freezes. She always knew there was a chance that Tsubasa would be here. In the hubbub of the party, however, she’d completely forgotten, and the sight of that sharp face and those flashing green eyes makes her heart flip in her chest. Maki, feeling her tense up, turns to look too and stiffens immediately, her grip on Nico’s arm tightening. 

Nico has no idea how to react here. Should she call out to Tsubasa? Should she wave or turn away? She doesn’t want to make a scene, but it seems wrong to just pretend that they haven’t noticed her. From this distance, it’s hard to gauge what Tsubasa might be thinking - whether she’s surprised, whether she’s angry to see Nico and Maki together. For a long, awkward moment, they all just stare at each other, unmoving.

And then the corners of Tsubasa’s lips curl into a small smile. She nods politely at them. Hesitantly, Nico nods back. Tsubasa holds her gaze evenly for a few more seconds, and then the woman she was talking to says something else and she turns her attention back to her. Nico watches as she leans in closer to listen, then laughs, and it’s so good to see her wearing such a carefree expression. She looks happier than Nico’s ever seen her. 

Nico glances back at Maki,  intending to make some lighthearted comment, but she stops short. Maki's expression looks distant, as if she’s reliving memories of another time, another place. For a moment, uncertainty takes hold of Nico, and her mind races to the worst possible conclusions she can conjure.

Then, Maki takes her elbow gently and tilts her head to one side. “Ready to go home?” she asks, and her tone is so sweet and sincere that all of Nico’s worries are swept away instantly. Her heart swells with affection and gratitude. 

“Yeah.” Nico smiles. “Let’s go.”

They step out into the night.

  


**ii.**

“I still can't believe," Nico says, as they shuffle into Maki’s apartment, “that you turned down that modeling job.”

“The campaign was a one-time thing,” Maki says, locking the door behind her. “I already told you I’m never modeling again.”

Nico slips off her shoes. “He should’ve asked me instead. I would’ve promoted the heck out of that sports drink and become a household name in the process!”

Maki hums. “A genius makeup artist, star fashion blogger, and sports drink model, all in one? I don’t think I could handle that much.”

“I know! You’re so lucky to have me!”

Maki smiles at that. “Yeah,” she agrees. “I am.” 

She reaches out and catches Nico’s arm, feeling bold and giddy from the nice evening and the free champagne. Nico glances up, her eyes big and bright, and before Maki knows it she's moving in, so naturally that it's barely a conscious choice, as inevitable as the pull of gravity. She leans soft and slow into the warmth of Nico's mouth, picking back up where they left off by the door to her apartment.

It’s so easy to just kiss Nico whenever, wherever she wants. And Maki finds herself wanting it a _lot_. Some days she feels like a teenager, hopped up on hormones and hungering for just another touch, another taste of her girlfriend’s lips. Although, considering Maki was still fervently repressing her sexuality by throwing herself into studies and extracurriculars during her high school days, maybe she’s just making up for lost time. 

They kiss their way into the living room, falling back against the sofa with a practiced motion. Maki’s lost track of the number of times they’ve traced this exact path - from the door of her apartment, past the shoe racks and the tacky art Nico forced her to put up because the walls were “too bare” - and ended up here, tumbled against the cushions, breathless and laughing.

Nico pulls away and raises herself up on her elbows, the weight of her body pressing Maki into the couch. She gazes down at Maki, looking smug, her face cast half in shadow because they hadn’t bothered turning on any of the lights on their way in. 

“Couldn’t even wait until we got changed, huh?” she whispers, so close that Maki can feel her breath upon her own skin.

Maki returns her taunting with a smirk of her own. “I just figured you wouldn’t be able to wait much longer. You were practically climbing into my lap in the taxi.”

“Lies. Nico’s a classy girl. I’d _never_ be so crude.”

“Remind me. Who was it who tried to jump me in my car the other day?”

“Oh, come on. You _loved_ that.”

“I was driving!"

"It could've been so hot." Nico sighs wistfully. “ _Such_ a missed opportunity." 

Maki suppresses a snort. “Nozomi’s right. We _are_ gross.” 

“Well _excuse_ me.” Nico presses a soft kiss to her neck. "It’s kinda hard not to be excited about how I’m the luckiest girl in the whole world.”

Maki flushes at the compliment. Nico’s long hair falls forward, and Maki reaches out to trail her fingers through it. Her curls have softened to loose waves now, falling about her petite face and framing it perfectly. Maki's overwhelmed by how pretty Nico is, even in half-darkness.

“That’s me,” Maki mumbles, and Nico leans back, her eyes wide. Maki almost loses her nerve under Nico's crimson gaze, but God knows they’ve been dating long enough that she’s not about to come over all shy now. “That’s me, Nico,” she says, more confidently. “I mean it. I love you so much, and I-”

Nico crashes down on her. That’s the only way Maki can describe it. She kisses Maki and waves of ocean warmth crash against her, kisses her until she’s positively trembling. 

“I love you too,” Nico murmurs against her lips. “Love you-"

There’s too much fabric in the way. Maki’s long dress feels thick and heavy pressed against her thighs, and she wishes she could shed her clothes by force of will, without breaking away from Nico’s lips for even the few seconds it might take to undress. Maki feels the thrum of Nico's heartbeat, racing just as fast as her own, and she opens her mouth a little, whimpering against the ungodly rock of her hips that takes Maki somewhere desperate and needy -

"Nico," Maki pleads, drawing back, because she can't wait any longer. “ _Please._ ”

Nico strokes her face with delicate fingers, so tenderly that Maki _melts_. “Come here.”

When they stumble towards the bedroom together, shedding their dresses along the way, Maki has a moment to marvel at how much her life has changed. Half a year ago, she never would have imagined feeling so much heat and desire and pure happiness just from a single touch. Now, as Nico pushes her back against the sheets, love swells frantically forth from the depths of her chest. Nico looks at her, and Maki sees the way her eyes roam down her body, and it’s so _good_.  Maki's almost embarrassed by how much she _likes_ it, how Nico makes her feel so wanted. She never felt self-conscious, even the first time they made love. Under Nico’s gaze, she always feels so _beautiful_.

“I love you,” Nico murmurs again, pressing herself against Maki’s bare skin. Maki shudders against the warmth of her, gasping, seeing stars.

She never knew it could feel like this. Not until she met Nico.

***

Later, they’re laying side by side, nothing between them. Nico has her arms wrapped around Maki’s waist, and her warmth under the thick sheets drives away the early winter chill, making Maki feel cozy and safe. 

She smiles as she feels Nico’s lips press against the back of her neck and stirs a little.

“Still awake?” Nico whispers. 

“Mm. Just about,” Maki murmurs, and Nico laughs softly against her skin.

“Tonight was… great. I just wanted to say that. I mean, I have a lot of great nights with you, but tonight was, like… like _especially_ nice, you know?"

Maki stretches sleepily and shifts her body, turning over to face Nico. “I think so, too. I really, really enjoyed myself, Nico.” 

Nico's smile is bright even in the dark. "I'm glad.” She snuggles closer, exhaling contentedly. “Mm. You’re so _warm,_ Maki. Let’s hibernate. I wanna stay like this all winter.” 

Maki snorts. "I'd give you five minutes before you start complaining that you're bored."

"Nope. Not possible. You're way too cute for that."

Nico taps her nose affectionately, and Maki flushes, embarrassed by how such a simple compliment could send butterflies fluttering straight to her stomach.

“I bet you say that to _all_ the models you date,” Maki jokes, to hide how flustered she is.

Nico half-shrugs against the mattress modestly, playing along. “Well, I have to say, it gets results.” She inches her head forward, and the kiss they share is more giggles than lips.

Maybe they _are_ worse than Eli and Nozomi. But at least they have the decency to wait until they’re alone. Maki can’t think of anything better than these quiet moments when they can steal away from the rest of the world, when she can be shamelessly upfront and honest about her feelings in a way she never thought she could be. Maki never thought that overt displays of affection were something that came naturally to her. But now, she can barely hold back.

“You make me so happy,” she whispers, and Nico grins.

"That’s not how you felt when we first met," she remarks, her thumb brushing Maki's cheek fondly as she reminisces. “Remember that first makeover? You wouldn’t even let me touch your face, but now you’ll let me touch your-”

Maki claps a hand over Nico’s mouth before she can finish. She ducks away, chuckling, but when she settles against the pillow again, her gaze is soft and full of warmth. 

"What I’m trying to say is… it’s amazing how much things have changed. In the best way possible.” Nico's lips twitch with amusement. “I mean, I spent last winter all cold and lonely, and now I'm lying in bed with a super hot scientist model. I'm literally living the dream here.”

Maki’s heart swells. She doesn’t have the words to describe how much Nico means to her, so she just wraps her arms around her even more tightly, hoping that’s enough.

Nico curves into the embrace willingly, tucking her head into the nook of Maki’s neck. “Ahhh,” she sighs happily. “My favorite spot. I could totally do this forever.”

Maki strokes her hair, loving the way Nico’s breath tickles her skin. This, she knows, is the most contented she’s ever been, and she never wants it to end. She’s feeling so relaxed, so full of joy, that the next words just kind of slip out before she even thinks about them.

“Then why don’t you?”

Nico shifts in her grasp. She leans back a little so she can look up at Maki’s face, her eyes wide with uncertainty. "Huh?"

Maki reaches for Nico’s hand and takes it, twining their fingers together. Her confidence gains as she continues speaking, suddenly knowing that this is it, this is _right_. “I’m serious, Nico. Why don't you move in here?"

"Move in?" Nico repeats. "Move in… with you?"

" _Yes_ ," Maki says, practically laughing at how awestruck Nico seems. "Why not? We practically spend every day together anyway. My parents like you and you make me happy and you make my place smell nice and… I love waking up with you. I want to do that _every day._ You're always running back to your place to get new clothes or - or telling me that there’s no way you’re going to let me pay for another taxi… so what if you didn't. What if you lived _here_?"

The incredulity in Nico’s face melts away as she gradually realizes that Maki’s not joking around. She squeezes Maki’s fingers, a slow smile spreading across her visage. It's a rare treat to see Nico so speechless, so overcome with emotion that it takes her a moment to collect herself.

“Y-You know… I was _just_ about to suggest that actually.” 

Maki laughs. “Liar.” 

“No, really! I was!”

Maki just shakes her head. “So…” Her thumb brushes across Nico’s gently. “Is that a yes?”

Nico hooks her arms around Maki and pulls her in for a kiss, one so filled with passion and love and joy that it leaves no room for doubt.

“Yes,” she breathes, when they pull apart. “It’s a yes. Oh, but you’ll have to let me bring all my idol CDs over, because _of course_ I wanna display them in the living room. And we should redecorate! How do you feel about hot pink?”

Maki smiles and lets herself get pulled into the conversation, despite herself. 

“Absolutely not. And you can have _one_ shelf for your idol crap.”

“Come on, Maki. I'm an expert, trust me! I’m gonna make this place so cute! I'm thinking fairy lights in the bathroom... Oh, and you’re probably gonna need to clear that entire set of drawers because I kinda have a lot of makeup.”

Shaking her head, Maki fakes a sigh. “Can I still change my mind on this?” 

Nico leans in and grins. “Absolutely not.”

Wrapped in each other’s arms, they talk long into the night. In her future, Maki glimpses a crowded closet, extra pairs of shoes lined up against the door, lazy Sunday morning breakfasts for two. 

With Nico by her side, there’s a lot to look forward to.

And Maki can hardly wait to see what happens next.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> About 9 months ago, the two of us met up in Japan for a karaoke session and forgot to sing Girlfriend by Avril Lavigne. One off-hand comment about how it was a perfect NicoMaki song later, an exciting fanfic collaboration was born. Writing a 100k emotional cheating fic isn't easy at the best of times, and collabing it added a whole other level of difficulty. There were plenty of tough moments, disagreements, and days where we hardly progressed at all. Overshadowing all that, however, was our fervent desire to create a fanfic we could be proud of, as well as our dedication to NicoMaki. This really isn't something either of us could have pulled off alone, and at the end of the day, this has been one of the most positive creative experiences either of us have ever had. It was totally worth it and we’re happy to say we have no regrets. Thank you to everyone who has stuck with us until the very end, and we hope you enjoyed reading it as much as we did writing it!


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